英文电影评论写作指导

A Short Guide to Writing about Film

Paragraph 1: Offer your overall impression of the film while mentioning the movie's title, director, and key actors. 当提到这部电影的影视字幕,导演,主要演员时出示你对电影的总体印象。 Paragraph 2: Summarize the plot of the film总结电影情节

Paragraph 3: How did the actors portray key character roles? Did they fulfill your expectations given your knowledge of the original novel or play (if one exists)?

演员如何扮演处主要的人物性格?他们满足你对原著小说的期望了吗?

Paragraph 4: Were any particular film techniques used in key scenes?

在关键的场景中用到了特定的电影技术了吗?

How did the film techniques and music enhance the setting and themes of the film? 电影的科技和音乐如何加强电影的背景和主题的?

You may need two paragraphs to explain this information.

Paragraph 5: Address how well the film the novel or play. 说出电影怎么很好的呈现出小说或剧本的Offer evidence for your opinion.对你的观点出示证明Remember to mention use of symbols and literary devices.记住象征和文学手法的使用

Do they "transfer" from the novel/play into the movie well? 他们很好的将小说/剧本转换成电影了吗?

Paragraph 6: Ending paragraph--your last opportunity to guide the reader. Offer a clincher that tells the reader to attend the film or not.

最后一自然段——你最后的机会去引导读者。提供一个能告诉读者去看电影还是不去的理由。

 

第二篇:英语写作指导及范文

1. A Film Review

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你们学校的英语社团组织了一次英文电影欣赏活动,请你写一篇英文电影评论。 词数: 100左右

分析:

本次写作任务是写一篇电影评论。影评一般包括三方面内容:电影背景介绍,电影内容简介和评论。其中电影评论是写作的重点。在对某部电影评论之前,作者要明确读者熟悉所评论的电影,至少应该有所了解。因此对影片的背景介绍能使读者对电影有一个大致了解,一般包括对影片的故事背景、演职人员和获奖情况的介绍。影片内容回顾能使没有观赏过影片的观众了解剧情,为下文的影评做好准备。影片内容回顾要简明扼要,切忌拖沓冗长,但也要清楚交待故事的进展情况,尤其是与影评相关的细节。这一部分一般不加入个人的主观评价,只需要客观陈述故事内容即可。评论部分是影评的重点,可以从剧情的编排、演员的表演或者观后感悟等方面进行评价和论述。对高中生而言,我们只需要针对其中的某一点进行深入评论即可,不用面面俱到。需要注意的是,尽管作者可以放开思路进行评论,但始终不能背离所介绍的电影。影评写作一般用现在时态。

初稿:

Forrest Gump is my favorite movie which I have seen almost five times. On the one hand, I’m really moved by the real life of American people that time, on the other hand, by the confidence and courage taught by Gump’s mother. She would sacrifice anything to make her son understand the meaning of life and make him believe he is like everyone else. Just like Mum said: life was like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re gonna get. So that is why he always did everything seriously from his deep heart. Stupid is as stupid does. I think maybe we should be stupid sometimes in our real life now. Life is a gift and we should not waste it.

教师点评:

这篇初稿不惜笔墨大谈电影观后感和收获,但是忽略了对电影内容的介绍,这是一个较大的失误。尽管《阿甘正传》是一部家喻户晓的电影,但仍应在文章开头对影片进行简单介绍。

其次,在个人感想上,作者的思维比较混乱。虽然涉及到了很多方面,但是都不够深入。可以就电影感人的原因和观后启发深入探讨。另外,在表达方式上,文章还需要从以下几个方面进行改进:

1. 短语用法错误:on the other hand意思是"另一方面",在英文中,"另一方面"必须和"一方面"所说的意思相反,建议改为:not only ... but also ... 。

2. 连词用法错误:Just like Mum said: ... So that is why he always did ... "So"在英语中往往表示因果关系。仔细推敲这两句话,并不能由前句得出后句的结果,建议将"So ..."句改为"Gump does everything seriously with the belief that he could do the best as long as he makes effort."

下面我们来看修改后的成稿。

成稿:

The film Forrest Gump is about a person with a learning disability who is also unluckily born with a serious back problem. Most people think that people like Forrest can never succeed in anything, but this unlucky man achieved more than most people. He became a football star, a war hero, and a millionaire, and he did many other amazing things. I’m deeply impressed by Gump’s

attitude toward life. He pays little attention to what people think of him. Instead, bearing the motto "stupid is as stupid does" in his heart, he always tries his best to pursue his own dream. He has taught me that I should never give up on my dreams, even when life gets very hard.

教师点评:

文章涵盖了要点内容,对电影内容的介绍把握得很好,简明扼要。个人感想段落,也表现了不俗的思辩能力,逻辑合理,由浅入深,体现了思维层次的渐进。同时在表达方式上,用到了一些复合句式结构,如定语从句(who was also unluckily born with a serious back problem.)等。同时,作者也有意识地使用了一些高级词汇和句子间的连接词,例如achieve, bear ... in heart, instead等等。此外,文章的句型结构很丰富,体现了句型的多样性。

Powerful sentences:

1. The film describes his life as he lives through important times in American history from a very unique angle.

2. The film advocates a traditional moral idea.

3. The actor’s naturally sincere performance makes you believe that the film is real.

巩固练习:

假如你的美国笔友Nigel最近推荐你看一部获奖影片Pride & Prejudice(傲慢与偏见),请你给他写一封回信,谈一谈你对此部电影的观后感。

1. 词数: 100左右;

2. 开头和结尾已为你写好,不计入总词数。

Dear Nigel,

I’m writing to tell

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________What did you think of this movie? I’m looking forward to seeing your comments.

Yours,

Li Lei

第5期巩固练习参考范文:

Dear Nigel,

I’m writing to tell you what I think about the movie you recommended called "Pride & Prejudice". The story is based on Jane Austen’s novel about five sisters in Georgian England. Their lives are turned upside down when a wealthy young man, Mr. Bingley, and his best friend Mr. Darcy arrive in their neighborhood. MacFadyen, who plays the part of Darcy in the movie, is an outstanding actor! Another great addition is Keira Knightly. She is a jewel. Her beauty and her excellent acting add a great deal to the movie. In addition, the scenery, the backgrounds, and the other actors seemed much more real than the ones in previous versions. The costumes and hairstyles also seemed in keeping with the times. Personally, I only wish the movie was 6 hours long. What did you think of this movie? I’m looking forward to seeing your comments.

2. A Letter

写作指导

■写作任务:

随着科技的发展,机器人在我们的生活中扮演着越来越重要的角色,科学家们也不断研发出更多的机器人参与我们的生活。如果有机会和机器人交流的话,你想对他说什么呢?请以信件的方式把你想说的话写出来。

注意:1. 词数:110左右;2. 展开合理的联想。

■分析:

本文的写作任务是给机器人写信,考查的是想象力。从哪个角度来想象,怎么去想象呢?下面提供这样一种思路:联系现实生活:机器人对人类社会发展做出的积极贡献→目前的状况和发展的局限性→改进的方法和建议。

1.首先结合现实。我们不妨先想想机器人为我们做了什么:去条件险恶的深海或遥远的太空探险开发;它们装备了高速运转的生产线,为人类提供了丰富的产品等等。就机器人对人类做出的贡献,我们首先要感谢它们。

2. 除了感激之外,还有什么呢?它们也被称为"人",但是和人类的待遇却大不相同:它们不能说话,不能享受各种现代生活的乐趣;相对它们的付出而言,并没有得到同等的回报,因此我们应该对它们说声"对不起"。

3. 为了使机器人发展得更好,我们能做些什么呢?——努力提高科研能力,争取改善机器人的功能,让它们早日说话。这样的思路能使文章内容丰富,且能突显思辨的层次。 ■初稿:

Dear robot,

I’m writing to tell what we human beings think.

Robots are our close friends. They not only provide us with products in high speed, but also replace human beings in dangerous explorations. Their thinking speed is incomparable. Therefore, they can solve problems more rapidly than human beings. I remember there is a report. When a big fire broke out, the fire is too big to break in. At this moment, robots went into fires to save people. They are true heroes. I want to say thanks to them, but they can not speak. What a pity!

I wish that one day you can speak.

Yours,

Jim

■教师点评:

本文表达了对机器人的赞美和感激之情,而且描写具体,具有很强的感染性,但是文章的内容略显单薄,只是表达了思维的一个层次:即机器人是英雄,没有进一步深入拓展话题。除此之外,作者在人称上还犯了一个较严重的错误,这封信先后使用了"you","they","you"的称呼,让人摸不着头脑,应统一成"you"。另外在语言的运用上还存在着一些不足:

1. 用词不准确。机器人是受人类控制的,它自己不能主动去大火中,建议将went into fire换为"were sent to",此外save不及rescue表达准确。再者,要辨别wish和hope的用法,wish常用于虚拟语气,本文应改为hope。

2. 注意句子的结构和动词时态。"When a big fire broke out, the fire is too big to break in."中主句时态错误。其次,这两个分句间并不存在时间上的逻辑顺序。可以将其处理为两个分句:A big fire broke out. And the fire was too fierce for firemen to approach.

■成稿:

Dear Robot,

I’m writing to tell you what we humans think about you.

You’re playing a more and more important role in our daily lives. In the deep sea or remote space, where explorers are either unable to or afraid to go, you’re sent to the front. Great

discoveries in these areas can be attributed to your sacrifices. If there weren’t you, we human beings could not get to the natural resources of the deep sea, or explore space as deeply as we do now. However, because of the limits of technology, you’re still unable to communicate or eat with us. The pains you suffer don’t pay off for you. We can understand you feel lonely and long to speak. We’ll try our best to make advances that will enable you to share your happiness with us.

Yours,

Jim

■赏析:

文章展开了合理的联想,既表达了人类对机器人的感激之情,又许下了对机器人的承诺,生动有趣,有吸引力。在文章的结构上,分两段叙述,条理清晰,层次逐步升华。此外,文章句式灵活多变,如定语从句(The pains you suffer),虚拟语气(If there weren’t you),表示原因用到了词组attribute to, because of。同时,本文动词词组的运用也是个亮点,send to, pay off, enable ... to ... 等等,都是学过的搭配,显示了作者较好的语言应用能力,值得借鉴。

■Powerful sentences:

1. Thanks to robots, we can probe space and the deep sea.

2. Factories equipped with robots can produce more.

3. With technological improvements, we bet your dream of being able to speak will come true. ■巩固练习:

现在科技在越来越多的方面渗透进人们的日常生活,并产生着多方面的影响。请你以通讯的发展为例谈一谈科技给生活带来的好处和坏处。

要求:1. 词数:100左右;2. 观点明确,逻辑合理。

练习参考范文:

Technology has greatly changed our daily lives. On the one hand, it’s convenient and fun. Several decades ago communication relied mainly on letters. Nowadays telephones, cell phones and especially the Internet have really sped up communication, to everyone’s benefit. Yet on the other hand, health and relationships have been badly affected. Long-term exposure to computers and cell phones can harm one’s hearing and even lead to cancer. Moreover, people are beginning to lose the skills of face-to-face communication. To sum up, we should not ignore the negative aspects of technology while enjoying its benefit.

3. A Letter of Sympathy

写作指导

■写作任务:

假如你叫李文,在报纸上看到英国某地发生了地震,请你给你当地的笔友Vikki写一封信,表达你对他的慰问。要求:用语适当;词数120左右。

■任务分析:

1. 本次的写作任务是慰问信(A Letter of Sympathy)。慰问信是向对方表示关怀、慰问的信函。它是机关单位或个人对某人、某集体所遭遇的困难或灾害表示慰问和支援而写的信件。在对方处于特殊情况时(如战争、自然灾害、事故),均可以写慰问信表示鼓励和安慰。慰问信的正文由两部分构成:首先表达作者的写信意图,即简述慰问信的背景和原因。接下来对对方的遭遇表示深切的同情和慰勉,并致以诚恳亲切、充满关怀之情的慰问之语。值得注意的是,在写作时应针对不同的对象和不同的事件使用合适的慰问用语。比如写慰问信给病人时,可以写一些被慰问者喜欢或熟悉的事物,如病人的爱好、兴趣等,以使病人得到宽慰;给遇挫的

人写信,可以多些励志之辞;给遭遇灾害的人写信,除了表达写信人对收信人的同情和安慰之外,还应明确表示提供支援和帮助的意愿。

2. 就本次写作任务而言,收信人是受灾地区的朋友,文章可以按以下步骤展开:首先表达你听到地震事件后的震惊和担忧,并询问你朋友的情况。接下来安慰和鼓励你的朋友(expressions of comfort and encouragement),这部分应是慰问信的重点,可以向其通报各国际组织对灾区的援救和世界各地人们的关注以令其安心,鼓励他虽身处灾区但仍应鼓足勇气面对灾害,最后也可以表示自己愿意尽一切所能来帮助朋友的意愿。写慰问信时,感情应诚恳真挚,设身处地站在对方的角度理解他们的真实感受,同时应做到文字简练,不必使用华丽的辞藻,因为在困难时期,没有人会有心情欣赏一篇华而不实的文章。

■初稿:

Dear Vikki,

How are you? I wish first of all a speedy recovery and return to school. A few days ago, I saw on TV that a strong earthquake hit your hometown, damaging many buildings and leaving some schools in ruins. Seeing dead bodies dig out from the ruins including many children, I can’t help tearing out of sadness, feeling very bitter. Although natural disasters are always terrible, the people of the world are giving a helping hand. They are donating money and sending their sincere love. I hope you are able to rebuild your homes as soon as possible, and return to school quickly. I hope you feel better. Be strong!

Yours,

Li Wen

■教师点评:

本篇习作涵盖了慰问信包含的两个基本方面,但在交际效果上慰问、鼓励效果欠佳,主要原因是作者对灾情场面的描述篇幅过多,使收信人的重点集中在对灾难的回忆上,因此应调整两个部分的侧重点。另外,文章在句式和词汇上还有待改进,表现在如下几个方面:开头问候语"How are you?"不合乎慰问信的写法。其次,在表达写作意图的情况下第二句话"I wish first of all a speedy recovery",显得突兀,建议最好用"I’m sorry to hear ..."句式来做开头。再者,正文中还用到了"dead bodies"这类让读者感到触目惊心的词,让安慰的效果大打折扣。最后,作者只谈到了外部援助,而没有表达相信人的主观力量这一观点,也并未表达自己提供支援和帮助的意愿,其真诚不足以让人信服。

■成稿:

Dear Vikki,

I’m sorry to hear that your hometown was affected by an earthquake. I got news from a report that the earthquake destroyed your hometown. Lots of houses collapsed and some of the people couldn’t find their families. I feel so sorry for your loss.

Please don’t feel sad. Kind-hearted people are always around you. They are trying their best to make your life easier. Many people are donating money and blood for you, so you should take

care of yourselves. I believe you are strong and can overcome the pain. No matter what happens, I’ll always be with you. Best regards and wishes.

Yours,

Li Wen

■成稿赏析:

文章涵盖了要点内容,条理清楚,叙述清晰。首先叙述灾情,然后表达个人的感情,最后鼓励他们战胜困难,这样的递进式结构,安排合理,符合思维习惯,显示了作者较好的思辨能力;同时,文章词汇丰富、句式多变,祈使句,让步状语从句等句式的交替使用,为表情达意增色不少。

■Powerful sentences:

1. I hope you always feel loved and protected.

2. Many kind-hearted people have contributed to the relief effort.

3. Please pass my concern onto your parents.

4. I know that your faith, family and friends will help you make it through this challenging time.

5. I want to write to tell you how sorry I am to hear about your loss.

6. While there is nothing I can say to ease your pain, I want you to know that I am grieving for and thinking of you all. 7. I am always here if you need me. I’ll be in touch soon to see if I can make myself useful in some way.8. Don’t feel lonely. Don’t feel abandoned. You are no longer helpless as our regard and love will accompany you all the time.

■巩固练习:

汶川地震中被压废墟70多个小时,截肢获救的小女孩李月一直牵动着很多人的心。尽管失去了左腿,但她仍然坚持着自己的舞蹈梦想。请你以李易的名义写一封英文信为李月加油!信的开头和结尾已写好,不计入词数。

要求:内容全面;词数120左右。

提示:Leg amputated 截肢

Dear Li Yue,I’m sorry to hear how you suffered during the "5.12"earthquake. ...Yours,Li Yi

第13期巩固练习参考范文:

Dear Li Yue,

I’m sorry to hear how you suffered during the "5.12"earthquake. I heard your story on TV. After being buried in the ruins for over 70 hours, you stuck to your dream of dancing and waited to be rescued. I can understand how hard it was for you to overcome both the fear and the pain both mentally and physically. Your enduring spirits won in the end. It’s unfortunate that you lost your left leg in the earthquake and I’m sure you must feel terrible about it, although I am sure you will achieve your dream all the same. As the old Chinese saying goes, "Where there’s a will, there’s a way."I believe your dream will come true someday and I will always be with you. Best regards.

Yours,

Li Yi

4. A Poster

写作指导

●写作任务:

某国际环境网站以"保护环境,拯救地球"为主题面向全球中学生征文。请你根据所给的海报,写一篇英文短文,呼吁大家改善环境,保护大自然。要求:1. 简要描述海报内容,并对其进行分析;2. 提出自己在保护自然、改善环境方面的建议;3. 开头已写好,不计入总词数;4. 词数120左右。开头:The human beings and the animals are living in an endangered environment. ●任务分析:

本次写作任务要求根据海报写一封有号召含义的短文,属于看图写作,其关键是看懂图画。写作任务要求对海报内容进行描述并进行分析,因此作者不但要看明白图画的表面内容,而且要看到其反映出的问题。否则,文章可能因为仅仅描述画面而流于肤浅。另外,图画只是为了

引出话题,因此描述画面时语言要简洁明了,重点应该放在对问题的分析上。就本次写作任务来说,文章可以分为三个部分:

1. 描述海报。对海报画面的描述不一定要面面俱到,可以选其中有代表性的一两点来展开,比如:汽车排放大量尾气、森林被伐、动物无栖身之地等有视觉冲击效果的内容,以给读者留下深刻印象。

2. 提出建议。根据从图画中总结出的环保问题,给出相应的解决方法,如建议人们骑车取代开车、退耕还林等。

3. 结尾段,仍应重申环保的重要和紧迫性以达到强化主题的目的。另外,由于本文是号召性文章,因此用语要有力,建议多用祈使句,以增强气势。

●初稿:

The human beings and the animals are living in an endangered environment. The growth of the population means more accommodation. Trees are being cut down. The land which was once full of grass and forests was turned into barren land leaving animals homeless and causing terrible floods. More and more cars are giving out polluted gas. It’s harmful to our health. And dirty water is flowing into the river, which kills fish. What’s more, more and more garbage is mounted in cities. Everyone should take action to protect our environment. In order to reduce the pollution, we’d better ride bikes and use environmental bags. In addition, we can plant more trees and grass to protect our lands. Moreover, we should not throw garbage into the river. In this way, we can have a more beautiful tomorrow.

●教师点评:

文章涵盖了写作要点,在描述画面和提出建议方面没有遗漏。但文章对画面描述和问题陈列的份量远远超出了解决问题的方法,混淆了主次内容。建议精简首段画面陈述,多着墨于问题解决的方案。在两段之间应给出一个过渡句,以更好地衔接上下文。文章结尾亦缺乏总结性内容,读起来有残缺不全之感,应对前文做一总结使文章完整。另外要注意用词得当:full是"充满"的意思,表示草地与森林覆盖应用"coverd with";废气的准确表达应是"exhaust gas"或"polluted air";环保袋的正确表达是"environment-friendly bag".

●成稿:

Human beings and animals both live in an endangered environment. The sky is grey and the rivers are turning black. Furthermore, certain species of plants have been greatly reduced due to the rapid growth of modern cities. Many animals are dying out due to the loss of forests and the polluted air is doing great harm to people’s health. This is the world we live in and it is high time we did something to improve our environment. We can start using environment-friendly bags instead of plastic ones. We can throw rubbish in garbage cans instead of on the ground. We can write letters to our friends on ordinary paper instead of sending cards. Moreover, we should plant more trees to create homes for wild animals. If everyone makes a bit effort, we can make a great difference to our planet.

●成稿赏析:

本文结构严谨,在看图和议论的篇幅分配上,比例均衡,同时,作者在第一段和第二段之间用了"This is the world we live in"来承上,用"it is high time we did something to improve our environment"来启下,衔接自然。其次,本文用词比较平实,但贵在准确;句式整齐,读起来朗朗上口,很具有号召性。

●Powerful sentences:

1. Only by changing the way we treat the environment can we find balance.

2. If we don’t take actions to protect the environment, we will have to face an increasingly

difficult situation.

3. We can help to publicize the importance of environmental protection.

4. Measures should be taken to protect the environment around us.

●巩固练习:

美国人Sidney正在做一个关于环境的调查,请你写一篇文章,向他简单地介绍一下你家乡的环境问题。要求:1. 逻辑合理;2. 词数120词左右。

第12期巩固练习参考范文:

My hometown, Jingzhou, lies on the bank of the Yangtze River. It’s abundant in rice and fish. The scenery is beautiful here and the town is comfortable for people to live in. However, in recent years, more and more houses and roads have been built. With these new developments, water and air pollution have become serious problems. A great deal of garbage is thrown into the Yangtze River. Many factories discharge poisonous gas without filtering it, which does harm to people’s breath. And the expansion of the population leads to the disappearance of big forests, causing terrible floods. In my opinion, Jingzhou should take effective measures to reduce the amount of pollution. Only if everyone loves and cares for our city, can it become more beautiful.

5. A Poster

写作指导

▲写作任务:

《疯狂的石头》要在你们学校大礼堂公映,为了方便来你校访问的美国中学生欣赏这部电影,请你写一个英文海报。中文海报内容如下:

片名:《疯狂的石头》

导演:宁浩

类型:喜剧小制作,新面孔,大笑料,保证你每五分钟笑一次

时间:10月25日星期六晚上7点半地点:学校大礼堂

票价:免费请到大礼堂取票,余票不多,欲领从速!

▲分析:

海报(poster)是一种具有宣传性质的广告,从文体上说属于说明文类型。海报所宣传的内容各不相同,因此写海报前首先要确定海报的内容和目的。语言要简洁明了,能够突出主要信息。一般来说海报要包括活动名称、时间、地点和费用等详细信息,必要时还要对活动的特色稍加说明;语言上,要具有一定的吸引力和号召力,从而达到广而告之的目的。如:This Week’s Film News

Name: Jane Eyre

Time:7:30 p. m., Dec. 16, Saturday

Place: The School Auditorium

Cost:2 yuan

Please apply to the Film Projection Group for tickets. Only a few are left. Buy now while they last.也可用一段说明性文字来写;也可以把二者结合起来用文字说明加分项排列的方式写,如:

Concert Announcement

A concert will be given by teachers and students of the Beijing Institute of Music. The program includes male and female solos, ensembles, choruses, and piano and other instrumental performances. Admission free.Time:7:30 p. m., July 7

Place: The School Auditorium

就本文来说,我们要注意两个方面:

1. 海报的内容要完整准确。这就需要我们根据所给信息,把时间、地点等信息如实反映。这是海报写作的基础。

2. 发出邀请,用语要具有号召力。就本文来说,为吸引大家的注意,我们可以使用"保证你笑个痛快","错过了一定会后悔"之类的语言。为增强文章的醒目性,写作时可以用Do you like ... 或Do you have time ... ?之类的一般疑问句式发出号召,效果会更理想。

▲初稿:

In order to enrich students’lives, we’ve decided to show the movie Crazy Stone. This movie was produced by a young director called Ning Hao and a group of no-name actors. It’s cheap, but the story will keep you laughing. Don’t miss it! It’s showing at half past 7, Saturday, October 25th, in the Great Hall. Don’t be late, and have fun!

▲教师点评:

文章涵盖了题目大部分要点,但漏掉了电影类别、票价、购票地点等基本信息。同时,文章中简单句太多,导致句子关系不够紧密,建议句式上适当合并。例如对电影演员、导演的介绍,我们可以用介词状语的句式来写:

Featuring the collaboration of non-famous actors and open-minded director Ning Hao, this movie is full of black humor.

▲成稿:

In order to enrich students’lives, we’ve decided to show a new comedy, Crazy Stone, on campus. It will be presented in the Great Hall at 7:30 pm, next Saturday, October 25th. It’s a dark comedy directed by Ning Hao and produced by Andy Lau. It’s been very popular, despite its low budget and cast of unknowns.

The film is currently a big hit in China, out-performing all other foreign films. If you like a good laugh, you shouldn’t miss this film.

Please apply at the Great Hall for free tickets. Only a few are left, so get them while they last. ▲赏析:

这篇文章涵盖了所有信息,内容完整;在全文的结构层次上分为三个段落,条理清晰,给人一目了然的感觉;在语言表达上,虽然比较平实,但贵在精练准确。

▲Powerful sentences:

1. Everyone is warmly invited to both events, and should come to the office for tickets.

2. Those who want to take part in the con-test should sign up at the office of the Students’Union before May 25th.

3. All are welcome to enter the contest.4. Come join the fun!

▲巩固练习:

你们学校将于10月18日(本周六),下午6点在大礼堂组织一次艺术展,展品包括学生及家长自制的带有中国传统特色的剪纸、皮影等艺术品,另外也有学校老师的书画作品。请你写一个海报,邀请你们学校的外国留学生来参加。

参考词汇:剪纸paper-cut 皮影戏shadow-play

要求:1. 内容完整,可以适当增加细节,使结构完整。2. 词

数100左右。

巩固练习参考范文

An arts exhibition will be held at 6 o’clock this Saturday, October 18th, in the Great Hall. The items on display are all made by students, teachers and parents. The exhibition includes a

variety of works, not only traditional Chinese paper-cut and shadow-play, but also excellent calligraphy and drawings. They have been chosen from hundreds of works. Further surprises not mentioned here are awaiting you. Don’t miss this if you’re interested in traditional Chinese culture. The artists will be available to discuss their works. See you next Thursday evening!

6. A Profile简介

写作指导

写作任务:

英语写作指导及范文

要求:1. 词数100左右;2. 不要逐字逐句翻译。3. 参考词汇:业余体校:the amateur sports school国家集训队:National Training Team亚运会:Asian Games世界乒乓球锦标赛:World Table Tennis Championships

●分析:1. 本次的写作任务属于人物介绍类的说明文。此类文章内容一般包括:人物基本信息介绍、突出特点或事迹描述以及对人物的点评。人物信息一般包括姓名、年龄等内容;人物的突出事迹,可以从他/她的获奖和贡献等方面展开;点评部分可以谈谈自己的看法,你欣赏他/她什么?从他/她身上学到了什么?2. 本文可分两段,一是人物介绍(introduction),这是文章的核心;二是评论(comment),属个人发挥的总结段落,写出你喜欢她的原因,一两句话即可,起画龙点睛作用。3. 本次的写作任务不仅考查人物介绍的能力,而且还有捕捉信息和组织材料的能力。材料中通过分类把写作对象的情况清晰地罗列出来,但是在写文章时,并不一定要按表格所给的性别和出生地等顺序展开。我们可以从中选择较为重要的信息,并对有关联的信息进行重新组合,因此对松散材料的组织能力也是本次写作任务考查的一个重要方面。另外,由于材料提供的内容较多,在不遗漏要点的情况下,用100词表达出来,考查的也是作者提炼语言的能力,用较少的词传递出较多的信息。

●初稿:

My favorite athlete is Deng Yaping. She is a world-famous table tennis player.

She is from Henan Province. At the age of 4, she began to play pingpong with her father’s help. When she was 8 years old, she won the ping-pong championship at a national competition. In 1988 she joined the National Training Team and won a lot of gold medals. Among her victories, she won gold medals in the table tennis competition at the 11th Asian Games and the 41st World Table Tennis Championships, as well as two gold medals in the 25th Olympic Games. She is only

1.5 meters high, but she worked hard and finally found the power in herself to win. She has set a very good example for us.

●教师点评:

本文基本涵盖了要点内容,三段式的结构清晰地展示了文章的层次。而且在时间的处理上,介词短语和时间状语交叉使用,避免了呆板。但是文章还存在一些需要改进的地方。

1. 总体感觉句式缺少变化,简单句使用过多,文章大部分句子都是以she开头的。有些句子稍加变化后,可整合为并列句或复合句,使句式多些变化。

2. 某些词语的用法不够准确,如:with her father’s help意义太宽泛,并不能精确地表达"指导"的意思,建议改为under her father’s instructions;二是要注意power的准确意义:power侧重于"天赋;力量;体力",建议改为ability,它侧重于"技能;做某件事所需的能力;才能;才智"。

3. 表达方面的错误。1.5 meters high应改为1.5 meters in height或1.5 meters tall。 ●成稿:

My favourite athlete is Deng Yaping. She is a world-famous table tennis player.She was the table tennis champion of the 11th Asian Games and the 41st World Table Tennis Championships, and she won two gold medals in the 25th Olympic Games.How did she become so successful even though she competed against people who were much taller than her? She kept working hard. At the age of four, she began to play table tennis under the guidance of her father. When she was eight she won the ping-pong championship at a national competition. In 1988 she became a member of the National Training Team. On her way to success, she proved that height was nothing and hard work was everything.

●赏析:

本文突破了传统的人物写作方法,把成就列在前,后叙述原因,有创意地把时间顺序融入到"前果后因"的材料组织中。同时,全文还特别注意了逻辑顺序和时间顺序,这点值得我们借鉴。在用词上,虽然并没有看到一些高级词汇,但是小词的准确运用,也收到了意想不到的效果,如:On her way to success, she proved ... 反映出作者很扎实的基本功。在求新的基础上,准确也是千万不能忽略的。

●Powerful sentences:

1. After several years of hard work, she mastered the basic skills and joined the National Training Team.

2. Her hard training helped her overcome many disadvantages.

3. Her success proves that where there is a will, there is a way.

●巩固练习:

基本信息:程菲, 19xx年5月28日出生于湖北黄石个人成绩:20xx年在雅典第一次参加奥运会,在自由体操上取得了第四名的成绩。之后,教练发现程菲腿部力量惊人,于是对她进行自由体操和跳马的专项训练。这两项是中国体操的传统弱项,但程菲不怕挑战,努力训练,终于完成了以她名字命名的“程菲跳”。在20xx年体操世锦赛女子跳马单项决赛中,程菲成功卫冕。

体育生涯:6岁时开始练习体操,10岁进入湖北省队。20xx年,程菲进入国家队。 请结合上面的材料,写一篇介绍程菲的英文文章。

要求:1. 不要逐字翻译,词数100左右;2. 参考词汇:跳马vault体操世锦赛World Artistic Gymnastics Championships自由体操floor exercise程菲跳Cheng Fei’s Jump

第8期巩固练习参考范文:

Chen Fei—My Favorite Gymnast

Cheng Fei, born in 1988 in Hubein Province, began to practice gymnastics at the age of 6. In 2001, she joined the national team. She won the women’s vault at the 40th World Artistic Gymnastics Championships in 2007. Three years ago, at the Athens Olympic Games, Cheng Fei placed fourth in floor exercises and became a new star. In 2004, China’s national team coaches

discovered that Cheng Fei had strong legs, so they decided to train her in vault and floor exercise, which China’s team had traditionally been weak in. Cheng Fei practiced hard and succeeded. Now, Cheng Fei has a signature move which is named after her. It is called the "Cheng Fei’s Jump".

7. A Short Essay

写作指导

●写作任务:

英语讨论会上,同学们对于古典音乐和现代音乐抒发了不同的看法,请你根据下面的表格,

英语写作指导及范文

开头:Last week, our class held a discussion about the differences between classical music and modern music.

要求:

1. 可补充适当的内容;词数100左右;

2. 参考词汇:格式:format 旋律:rhythm

●任务分析:

1. 本次写作任务是对不同的音乐风格进行讨论,属于说明文范畴,考查的写作技能是对比比较法comparison & contrast。比较(comparison)是分析不同的人、物、地点或观点之间的相同之处;对比(contrast)是分析它们之间的差异。根据命题要求,我们可以看出本次写作任务是比较二者的区别,因此是用对比法。在处理对比类的作文时,一般可以采取两种文章构架:一种是以比较的对象来进行,即把要比较的两个主体的特点分别罗列陈述,使读者对所描述主体一目了然;另一种是按照比较主体的各个特征方面展开,当主体特点较多时往往逐点进行比较,使读者较易掌握两主体间的差别。

2. 就本次写作任务而言,我们采用逐点比较法。从二者的发源时间、格式旋律和标题及歌词三个方面进行对比。在对比过程中为了避免要点的僵硬罗列,要注意使用表示比较对比类的连接词,如, while, compared with, unlike, different from 等。在完成这三点的比较后,还需要对全文做一个总结(sum-up),这样可以在内容上和开头相呼应,使文章结构完整。

●初稿:

Last week, our class held a discussion about the differences between classical music and modern music. The results are following:

Firstly, they happened in different times. One is from the 18th century in Europe and the other is from the 20th century, when different music all over the world influenced each other.

Secondly, they are different in formats and rhythms. Classical music has a serious format and rhythm, but modern music is informal. There are no limitations on formats and rhythms.

Thirdly, classical music has no lyrics and titles. And modern music is different. The above

are the results of the discussion. In a word, they are different from each other.

●教师点评:

文章基本是按照"由总及分"的格式展开,但是只是翻译了题目要点,没有对表格材料进行组织并深入详述。另外,different出现频率过高,可用compare和vary之类的动词表达"区别",以避免用词单一。文章中的语法和词汇错误较多,表达不准确,具体表现在以下几个方面:

1. 中式英语痕迹明显:"结果如下"可以表达为"The results are as follows";或者"Above are discussion results."

2. 用词不准确。Serious确切的意思是"严肃的,认真的",这里要表达"严格",应为"strict";"but"表达前后转折之意,如要表达前后对比,建议用"while";否定词"no"和"and"连用并不常见,建议换为"neither ... nor ..."。

●成稿:

Last week, our class held a discussion about the differences between classical music and modern music. By contrasting different sides of the two kinds of music, we sum up the differences as follows.

First of all, they have different origins. Classical music started in Europe during the 16th century and has been developing ever since due to contributions by great musicians such as Beethoven and Tchaikovsky. On the other hand, modern music began in the 20th century with roots in the blues and rock and roll. Secondly, the both vary in formats and rhythms. Classical music has a more strict format and rhythm, while the latter is more free and can change due to local conditions. Thirdly, they differ in titles and lyrics. Classical music has a different kind of titling system. The title in classical music can tell you the feeling of the piece or the artist’s inspiration. In modern music most titles are simple and show a more direct relationship to the lyrics.

In one word, they differ from each other, but both enjoy importance in the history of music. ●赏析:

文章完全涵盖了要点内容,作者"由总及分",层次较清楚。文中句式富于变化,避免了总是以they开头的单调、呆板的写作模式。文章用词比较恰当。

●Powerful sentences:

1. They differ in three items as follows.

2. We can distinguish them in three aspects, including...

3. There is an obvious difference in their origins.

●巩固练习

假如你们学校的英文校报针对网络购物这一新兴事物发起一场讨论,征集关于网购和普通购物的比较文章,请你写一篇110词左右的文章投稿。

第11期巩固练习参考范文:

These days many people can do their shopping in the comfort of their own home with the help of the Internet. Compared with traditional shopping, shopping online saves time and money. No longer do you have to make the trek to the grocery store or discount store as the traditional shopper does. You can order anything you want with a click of your mouse. And the price offered online is usually lower. However, traditional shopping has its own advantages. It brings irreplaceable joy, security and satisfaction. Shopping with friends or family is a way to communicate with others and share happiness. And you don’t have to worry about online scams and piracy. To sum up, they have their own advantages and bring different joys and convenience to

different groups of people.

8. Adventure

写作指导

写作任务:

你校学生会于上周组织全体师生去野生公园游玩,请你写一篇报道记叙此次活动,并刊登在校刊英文版上。活动内容包括:1. 参观室内展厅;2. 和户外野生动物近距离接触。写作要求:1. 主题突出,内容完整;2. 语句连贯通顺,无语法错误;3. 词数:100左右。

写作分析:

本次写作任务要求写一篇报道,属于记叙文的一种。报道是对某一事件的发生、发展、结果的真实反映,因此,报道也要遵循记叙文写作的几个基本要素,即时间、地点、主要对象、事件、起因和结果。报道的写作目的在于向读者介绍某一次事件。为了吸引读者的注意,报道往往在开头部分用简短的篇幅对此次事件做要点性描述,正文部分再进行具体介绍。在语言方面,报道虽以记叙为主要表达方式,但也穿插有描写、抒情和议论。人称可以采用第一人称或第三人称,时态宜用过去时。

本次写作任务要求报道一次出游活动,因此在文章的第一部分应对活动的时间、目的地、参加者和组织者进行简单说明。正文部分具体介绍活动的内容和经过。根据题目中给出的要点,同学们可以得知,此次参观活动分为两个部分,先参观室内展厅,然后去户外和野生动物近距离接触,具体的活动细节,同学们可以根据自己的经历,或合理发挥想象进行补充。在室内展厅里,同学们可以看到哪些图片或标本?在室外环境中,同学们又见到了哪些野生动物呢?需要注意的是,报道并非故事创作,应注意内容的合理性,要站在一个客观的角度,如实报道活动的过程和期间所见所闻,而不要出现太多个人情感的抒发。在文章的结尾处,应说明此次出游活动的结果和意义。由此看来,要想写一篇吸引读者的报道,同学们不仅需要突出主题,更要在事件或活动中找出亮点,令你的报道内容充实,具有可读性。

初稿:

Last week, all the students and teachers in our high school went to the Wild Animal Park. The trip was organized by the Students’Union.The Wild Animal Park is divided into two parts: indoor exhibition and outdoor area. It was lucky that there were not so many visitors that day. The indoor exhibition showed pictures of various kinds of wild butterflies, dinosaur fossils and other ancient wild animals. There were wild animals in outdoor area, such as lions, tigers and wolves. These animals were fed with live chickens. We had a great time during the trip to the zoo. We not only watched these wild animals in a very close distance, but also learned lots of knowledge of wild animals.

教师点评:

初稿内容完整,语句连贯通顺,无语法错误,但细读之后便会发现,初稿的第二段更像是说明文的写作方式,而非记叙文。初稿的第二段介绍了野生公园的布局,市内展厅及户外环境中都有什么,而对于此次活动的叙述明显不够,并且"It was lucky that there were not so many visitors that day."这句话在文章中的作用不大,下文也没有交代清楚作者写此句话的目的所在,可以删去。此外,初稿第一段语言稍显繁琐,应在成稿中加以改正。

成稿:

Last week, the Students’Union organized all the students and teachers to visit the Wild Animal Park.

First we visited the indoor exhibition. Many colorful pictures there showed us various kinds of butterflies, dinosaur fossils and other wild animals. Then we caught a bus and entered the outdoor area to see the wild animals, such as lions and tigers. For most students, it was the first time they had seen the wild animals so closely. It was really exciting. Through this activity, we learned a lot about wild animals, and about how humans can live happily with nature.

教师点评:

经过修改后的成稿主题突出、内容完整、语句通顺,突出了报道这种体裁的特点,是一篇不错的文章。正文部分具体叙述了此次活动的行程,对参观的两个部分各有侧重地进行了描写,令文章读起来更加详实丰富。成稿的语言更加简洁,适当地使用了first和then等词,使文章更显条理性,体现了作者清晰的思维。最后一段点明此次出游的目的和意义,使整篇报道更为完整。

Powerful Sentences:

1. The Students’Union will organize the contest.

2. We can see various animals in the Wild Animal Park.

3. The activity, held by ..., was very successful because ...

4. All the members were divided into three groups.

5. We not only had a wonderful time, but also learned a great deal during the activity.

巩固练习:

如果给你一次探险的机会,你将怎样安排自己的旅程呢? 请你计划一次探险之旅,参加某英文网站举办的主题为"Adventure"的征文活动。词数:120左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

My Adventure Trip

I like climbing. If there is a chance for me to go on an adventure, I want to climb the highest mountain with my friends.

Before setting out, we need to prepare. We must bring all the necessary equipment, including sports shoes, clothes, food, water and the tools we will need. While we climb, we can compete to reach the top of the mountain first. After we all reach the top, we will be able to appreciate the beautiful view and have a picnic. Then we can put on parachutes and glide from the top of the mountain down to the bottom. This adventure trip will give me a good opportunity to challenge myself, and I’m sure I’d really enjoy the time I will spend with my friends.

9. Advertising

写作指导

写作任务:

假设你叫李华,想通过某国际交友网站结交更多的外国朋友以提高自己的英语水平。现请你用英语写个交友广告。

内容要点:

1. 表明广告的用意;2. 具体介绍自己并描述笔友条件;3. 给出联系方式并表达自己美好的期望。

写作要求:

1. 条理清楚,层次分明,行文流畅;2. 120词左右。

写作分析:

本次写作任务是写一个交友广告,是一篇应用文。广告是以推销为目的的宣传性文体,通过对广告对象的描述和对其特征的描写让读者对所宣传的人或物有所了解,从而产生了解或购买的愿望。本次任务是通过广告向陌生人宣传自己,所以写作的重点应放在该交友广告的交际意图及其所应达到的效果上。因此,如何更好地向陌生人宣传自己才是本次写作的核心所在。在写作过程中,我们必须抓住人物的主要个性特征和突出品质,才有可能让读者更好地了解自己,从而给读者留下深刻的印象, 达到宣传自己的目的。由于写作任务中已经给出写作的内容要点,所以对于此类文章,我们可以按照要点进行构思。此外,由于是写广告,所以要注意写作内容的真实性,不能出现虚假信息。

就本次写作任务而言,我们可以按照如下思路构建写作的框架:

1. 确定中心话题。第一部分应该是写明广告的意图,即主要目的是交友,提高自己的英语水平。这部分非常重要,否则广告的作用就不能很好地体现出来。

2. 明确要点。第二部分作为广告的重点是要具体介绍自己,包括年龄﹑性别﹑爱好等,并在此基础上描述笔友应该具备的条件。此部分为写作的重点所在。写作过程中对于个人情况的描述介绍与笔友的条件的描写,可以分为两种写作方式,第一,先逐点介绍自己,然后再逐点描述笔友的条件;第二,两者结合起来,介绍自己某一个性特征之后紧接着描述笔友是否也应该具备这一特征。在介绍个人情况时,要注意信息的取舍,尤其要突出性格特征和兴趣爱好。

3. 总结文章。既然是通过广告给自己找笔友,那么就要写明自己的联系方式,以便有意向的外国朋友和你取得联系。此外,还要表达自己美好的期望,如I look forward to receiving your reply.等等。

初稿:

Making a Penfriend

I want to make a penfriend with people from all over the world.

Allow me to introduce myself first. My name is Li Hua. I am fifteen years old. I am a senior one student in Shandong Province. I am Chinese. I have a round face, black hair and brown eyes, and I am the tallest in my class. Whenever I spend time with my classmates, I always try to make them happy, but I am also a careless person who sometimes makes ridiculous mistakes. I am interested in traveling, swimming, playing table tennis and singing. I hope my penfriend is opening that has a lot in common with me.

My goal is to improve my English and learn more about foreign cultures.

教师点评:

文章按照任务要求基本涵盖了内容要点,表明了广告的写作意图,对自己的年龄、性别、爱好以及笔友的条件都逐一作了描述,达到了广告所要起到的效果。时态使用也基本正确。但是文章也存在一些不足之处:1. 信息冗余,个性特征不突出。比如文中对自己的外貌描写没有必要,属于无用信息,不具代表性,不是交笔友所要参考的必需信息,无法反映自己的个性特征,建议删去,而应加入更多反映自己兴趣爱好及性格特征的内容。2. 文章句式单一,且措辞不当。比如第二段基本上全部是单句,且句式一样,一连串的I am ...句式使文章读起来单调而无节奏感。此外,opening一词本意是"开始的,第一",而此处要表达思想开放的、活泼开朗的,应改为open-minded。

成稿:

Making a Penfriend

To improve my English and learn more about foreign cultures, I’d like to make a penfriend with anyone from an English-speaking country.

My name is Li Hua and I am a senior one student in Shandong Province, China. I’m

interested in traveling, swimming, playing table tennis and singing. In addition to these, I also like planting flowers at home. In my mind, I would like to meet a penfriend who is also fifteen, preferably a girl who has similar interests to mine. I hope to share my traveling, studying and gardening experience as well as anything else we have in common with my penfriend. Please pick up your phone and contact me now. My telephone number is ******. You can also send e-mail to me at lh3256@126.com. I look forward to receiving your reply soon.

教师点评:

成稿结构完整,内容全面。在开头表明广告的用意后,直接介绍自己,紧接着提出了自己心目中笔友的条件,最后给出了自己的联系方式以及表达了美好的愿望。文章行文流畅,条理清晰。同时,句式更加多样,用词也更加准确。例如, 过渡性的词汇in my mind, 高级词汇preferably, similar to, share with, in common以及look forward to等的使用,使文章增色不少。

Powerful Sentences:

1. I want to make an English penfriend to improve my written English.

2. With a penfriend, I would be able to share my experiences with him or her.

3. Making foreign friends is a good way to learn about foreign cultures.

4. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

5. My pen pal shares her happiness and sadness with me all the time.

巩固练习:

假设你有一台二手的收音机想要出售。现在请你写一个英语小广告张贴在你们学校的英语角公告栏上。

内容要点:1. 表明小广告的用意;2. 具体描述收音机的外观、性能以及售价等;3. 给出联系方式并表达自己美好的期望。

写作要求:1. 内容充实,结构完整,语义连贯;2. 120词左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

A Second-Hand Radio on Sale

Since I will graduate from middle school in a month, I am intended to sell my radio. The radio, TECSUN brand, has 12 short-wave bands and can pick up short-wave signals very easily. It also has digital function buttons. Its dimensions are 12cm×7cm×2cm, which makes it very easy to move around. It looks very modern and comes with a pair of earphones which match the radio. As for the price, we can discuss it face to face.

If you’re interested in this radio, please call me at 85873396 or come to my room 236, Dormitory Building No. 12. My name is Gao Fei. I look forward to hearing from you.

10. Animals

写作指导

●写作任务:

在你市举办的宠物选美比赛中,你班同学李华的宠物获得了第一名。作为校刊英文版的小记者,现请你写一篇文章报道此事。写作要求:

1. 主题突出,比赛场面描写生动详实;

2. 内容连贯通顺,无语法错误;

3. 词数:120左右。参考词汇:

宠物选美比赛Pet Beauty Contest

●写作分析:

本次写作任务要求写一篇报道,属于记叙文范畴。记叙文就是以叙述为主要表达方式,向读者介绍某一事件的文章体裁。报道属于记叙文的一种,是对某一事件的发生、发展、结果的真实反映,因此,报道也要遵循记叙文写作的几个基本要素,即时间、地点、主要对象、事件、起因和结果。报道为了吸引读者注意,往往首先揭示要报道的事件本身或结果,用简短的篇幅将最关键的时间、地点、人物、事件和结果告知读者,然后再回头追述其起因和经过,通常使用的是倒序法。正文对事件的描述和一般的记叙文无异。有一点需要提醒同学们,记叙文虽以记叙为主,但往往也穿插有描写、抒情和议论。

本次写作任务要求报道一次宠物选美比赛活动,属于侧重记事的记叙文,应以事件的起因、经过和结果为记叙重点。同学们可以根据报道的特点来安排文章的结构。首先,宠物选美大赛事件中最关键的是大赛结果,因此,首段要逐一报道大赛的时间、地点和结果。接下来是文章的正文部分,应集中记叙比赛的情况,包括参赛宠物的数量、比赛的过程,以及李华家的宠物摘得桂冠的经过。这其中当然应该有对获奖宠物的简单描写。题目中并无规定该宠物是什么,因此同学们可以自由发挥,选择一种自己喜欢的、熟悉的小动物进行描写。最后可以谈谈自己对该比赛的评价或由比赛引发的联想,如城市中的人和小动物应该和谐相处,人类需要尊重小动物等,以起到画龙点睛的作用。在叙述过程中,应注意文章的详略安排,抓住事件的高潮部分重点叙述,切忌平分笔墨。

●初稿:

My classmate Li Hua has a dog. Its name is Hero. Hero has big brown eyes and very cute small ears. Li Hua has been keeping Hero since he was ten years old. He loves his pet very much. Last Sunday Li Hua took Hero to the Pet Beauty Contest and won the first place. The contest was held on the sunny Sunday afternoon. More than one hundred pets took part in the contest. The officials of the contest had a short speech, then all the pets gave their performances in turns. Hero danced and played with a ball to the music. At last, Hero won the gold medal. Many people like dogs because they are people’s good friends. They’re good listeners and always on our side when we feel sad.

●教师点评:

初稿文章内容较完整、表达较流畅、基本完成了写作任务的要求,但在内容安排和文章结构方面仍存在一些问题。

首先,初稿的第一段有脱离主题内容之嫌,文中只是说李华有一只叫Hero的小狗,丝毫没提比赛的内容,尤其是最后两句话"Li Hua has been keeping Hero since he was ten years old. He loves his pet very much"尤其与主题无关,更不用说报道事件的关键要素。其次,第二部分的信息量不足。比赛的举办地点没有交代,另外Hero为什么得到了第一名也没有说明,建议在成稿中增加描写Hero表演的内容。此外,初稿最后一段画龙点睛的作用不明显。作者说明了狗是人类的好朋友,但缺少一句有分量的句子总结全文。

●成稿:

My classmate Li Hua’s pet dog, Hero, won the gold medal in the Pet Beauty Contest held on last Sunday afternoon in the City Square. More than one hundred pets took part in the contest. After the brief speech from the officials, all the pets lined up and performed for the audience one after another. Hero is a black dog with big brown eyes and small ears. He danced and played with a ball to the music, which attracted all the andience’s attention. As a result, his interesting performance and cute look won him the first prize. Pets are people’s good friends and can even be our family members, so we should respect pets and keep a good relationship with them.

●教师点评:

经过修改以后的成稿详略得当、层次分明、内容完整,完全符合报道的写作要求。首先第一段用一句话让读者获取了宠物比赛的大部分信息,基本说明了事件的概况。第二段完善了对选美比赛的记叙,不仅交待了比赛的举办地点,也较为详细地描述了Hero的有趣表演,使文章读起来更加生动形象。最后一段作者将文章主题升华至人与动物的关系,并以"we should respect pets and keep a good relationship with them"结束全文。在语言方面,成稿运用了定语从句,如"He danced and played with a ball to the music, which attracted all the andience’s attention."和连词短语"as a result"使文章读起来连贯通顺。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. She’s a pet lover.

2. Everyone is encouraged to bring their dogs, cats, birds, rabbits, fish and other pets to take part in the contest.

3. My pet is a ... with ..., which is called ...

4. As a result, ... won the first place / the gold medal because of its ...

●巩固练习:

请你写一篇文章记叙你和动物之间发生的一件事,投稿给校刊的"Animal Story"栏目。词数:120-150。

本期巩固练习参考范文

Lost Love

I once had a cute pet dog called Jerry. Every day when I got home from school, Jerry would run to the door and greet me. I would then pick him up and give him a hug. Jerry is like a member of my family. One day, when I came home from school, I didn’t see Jerry at the door. My mother told me that Jerry had died in an accident. When I heard this, my heart broke. I couldn’t accept the fact that I would not see Jerry anymore. The past flashed before me like a film. In the following week, I could not help going to his little house, but it was empty. I realized that Jerry had left me. I just hope there are no cars in the heaven where Jerry lives now.

11. Animals

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你和你的同学正在参加一个环保公益活动,请你为呼吁拯救藏羚羊(Tibetan antelope)

英语写作指导及范文

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务要求说明藏羚羊的现状、数量锐减的原因和应该采取的措施,内容比较清晰,注意使用适当的连词或句子过渡即可。

2. 文章以海报的形式呈现,目的在于呼吁社会对藏羚羊数量锐减的问题引起足够的重视。

初稿:

Tibetan antelopes are facing danger today. Where large groups of Tibetan antelopes were running together, we can hardly see one now. The population decline is mainly due to illegal hunting. According to a survey, each year about 20,000 Tibetan antelopes were killed by crazy hunters to get their valuable fur. What’s more, their activities were destroyed greatly by human activities, which made their life very hard.

It is high time that we took some measures before it is too late. The government should set down more laws to give a heavy attack to the Tibetan antelope markets. And more nature reserves of Tibetan antelopes should be set up to protect Tibetan antelopes.

教师点评:

初稿是一篇比较通顺、完整、条理清晰的作文。但是仍然存在一些不足之处:

首先,文章使用了太多的复杂句型,不符合海报的语言特点。海报的语言应该是简洁的,读起来节奏明快。

其次,文章的结尾没有明确对保护藏羚羊这一问题进行呼吁。

成稿:

Illegal hunters are pushing Tibetan antelopes to the edge of extinction. Every year about 20,000 Tibetan antelopes were killed. The antelopes’ beautiful fur is the main reason. As a result, the number of Tibetan antelopes has been greatly reduced. What’s more, the natural behavior of the remaining Tibetan antelopes has also been affected.

Many believe it is high time that we took action against these hunters before it is too late. Due to the fact that Tibetan antelopes’ fur trade in some countries has not been banned, more laws should be created to prevent people from buying and selling it. In addition, it is necessary for the antelopes to have their own nature reserves. Only by taking these steps can we solve this problem. We must work hard to protect this beautiful animal!

教师点评:

1. 文章的开头直接点题,既概括了藏羚羊的现状,又说出了造成这种情况的原因。

2. 文章的语言准确简洁,过渡词语运用恰当,例如:as a result, what’s more和in addition。

3. 文章长短句结合,句式富于变化。

Powerful Sentences:

1. They are now in danger because of ...

2. Without air, water and sunlight, nothing can live.

3. Human beings can’t survive without all the plants and animals around.

4. If we want to live a better life and have a bright future, we must learn to act in ways that do not harm other living things.

5. If we know more about what causes extinction, we may be able to take measures before it is too late.

巩固练习:

你的网友Bob近日看了日本著名动画片《龙猫》之后,对龙猫(Chinchilla)十分感兴趣,请你给他做一个简单的介绍。可参考下面的图片和表格所提供的内容。(词数:120左右)

英语写作指导及范文

英语写作指导及范文

本期写作指导参考范文

The chinchilla is a lovely animal that everyone will fall in love with. It has a tiny round body with a pair of small shining eyes. It loves to jump around like a naughty child. Besides, it is curious about everything. Whenever it finds a new thing, it will smell it and then try to bite it. In spite of its lively personality, it prefers living in a quiet environment. A chinchilla can live for as long as 8 to 10 years. It may owe its long life to its eating habits. It eats little, but eats many times a day. Many people choose chinchillas as pets because they are very clean.

12. Around the World

写作指导

■写作任务:

假如你是李磊,你将自己寒假期间登长城的照片贴在了自己的博客里,你的英国网友Jack对此非常感兴趣。请你写一封信向他简单叙述此次旅行的所见所闻。开头结尾已给出,不计入总词数。写作要点:

1. 介绍旅游景点;

2. 记叙旅游经历;

3. 谈谈你的感受。写作要求:

1. 条理清晰、详略得当;

2. 连贯通顺、无语法错误;

3. 词数120左右。

Dear Jack,

I went climbing the Great Wall with my parents in winter vacation. I’m so glad to hear that you are interested in this trip. I’ll tell you as much about it as I

can.______________________________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________

Yours,

Li Lei

■写作分析:

本次写作任务要求写一封信介绍一次旅行,属于记叙文中的游记类写作。书信的格式已经练习过多次,相信同学们已经很熟悉了,在此不作赘述。游记就是将自己在游览过程中的所见、所闻和所想记录下来。游记类文章主要是向人们介绍风光景点、名胜古迹、风土人情等,抒发自己参观游览的体验感受。游记类写作也要参照一定的写作顺序,可以按照旅游日程的时间顺序来写,也可以按照旅游景点的更换来推进文章的进展,这样才能使文章条理清晰、层次清楚。在记叙的过程中应该多注意对景点本身的描述,如其历史、地理位置、景色等,这样能够使文章的内容充实饱满。

本次写作任务已经将内容要点罗列出来,同学们只要按照提示的三个要点展开记叙即可。首先介绍长城的概况,篇幅不宜过长,一两句话即可。然后具体记叙游览的经历,这部分是文章的重点。旅行中哪些景色、人物或事件令作者感到印象深刻?又有怎样的感想呢?游览过程

中,所见所闻颇多,但并不是都要写到文章里去。游记虽然是对游览过程的记录,但不是面面俱到的记录。写游记最容易犯的毛病就是记"流水账",将出发前的准备和路上的琐事全部记下来,而关于游览本身或景点特色却只有寥寥几句。这样的详略不当会使文章读起来主题模糊。同学们应将重要的行程、有特色的景观、对表现文章主题有重要作用的事物进行重点描写,其它的则应一笔带过,或者干脆略去不写。最后,可以通过向Jack推荐长城这个景点,或邀请他来中国时参观长城结束全文。语言方面,游记类文章对语言的要求较高,同学们可以通过使用恰当的形容词和副词,令文章读起来生动形象。

■初稿:

Dear Jack,

I went climbing the Great Wall with my parents in winter vacation. I’m so glad to hear that you are interested in this trip. I’ll tell you as much about it as I can.

The Great Wall of China is one of the greatest wonders of the world. It attracts thousands of tourists at both home and abroad every day. It looks like a dragon, running across the mountains. I had seen the pictures of it many times, but when I really saw it, the feeling was so different. I still remember that day. When my parents and I reached the Great Wall at eight o’clock in the morning, we were so excited. Then we began climbing the Great Wall and took photos. About two hours later, we finally got to the top. I felt really happy. If you come to China, I’ll be glad to take you to appreciate the beauty of the Great Wall.

Yours,

Li Lei

■教师点评:

初稿包含了写作要点中的三点内容,无语法错误,但在详略安排及文章结构方面仍需较大改进。

首先,初稿对长城的介绍篇幅过长。本篇文章的重点应为游览的过程,因此,对于长城的介绍只需一两句即可。其次,在记叙游览长城的过程时给人以记"流水账"的感觉。初稿作者只是简单罗列了时间和动作,缺少生动的描述及内心感受,令文章读起来平淡无味。另外,有些句子和用词仍需斟酌,如"I had seen the pictures of it many times, but when I really saw it, the

feeling was so different."句中两个表示看的词都用see表达,而且转折表达的重点是感受,而不是when从句,建议修改或删除。

■成稿:

Dear Jack,

I went climbing the Great Wall with my parents in winter vacation. I’m so glad to hear that you are interested in this trip. I’ll tell you as much about it as I can.

The Great Wall is one of the greatest wonders of the world which attracts thousands of tourists every day. It is running across the mountains like a dragon.

When we arrived there, we were so excited that we started climbing immediately. The steps sometimes were flat, but sometimes steep. After two hours of climbing, we finally got to the top. I enjoyed the beauty of the mountains and took a lot of photos. I felt really proud and thought of the famous saying: "A man who has never been to the Great Wall is not a true man."If you come to China, I’ll be glad to take you to the Great Wall so that you can appreciate the beauty of the Great Wall.

Yours,

Li Lei

■教师点评:

成稿相对于初稿来说,结构更加合理,详略更加得当,行文更加流畅,描写更为细致。对长城的介绍简单明了,接下来对旅游经历的记叙尤其精彩。成稿作者通过描述初登长城时的激动心情,生动地体现了当时欢快且兴奋的状态。并且还引用了"不到长城非好汉"这个大家都十分熟悉的说法。另外在语言上,成稿作者运用了"so ... that ..."句型,使文章读起来紧凑生动,且长短句的配合也为文章增色不少。

■Powerful Sentences:

1. My trip to ... was really exciting / interesting / surprising /, because I ...

2. When / As soon as / The moment I arrived at ..., I saw ...

3. ... is well known for ...

4. This is the first time I’ve been to the ...

■巩固练习:

假如你是李华,在寒假期间你和家人一同去美国旅游。现请你以"我的美国之旅"为题写一篇游记,登在班级的英语板报上。词数:120左右。旅游行程安排如下:

1. 在大峡谷领略大自然的美丽风光;

2. 在好莱坞欣赏经典电影;

3. 在纽约中央公园拍照并野餐。参考词汇:

1. 大峡谷the Grand Canyon National Park

2. 悬崖cliff

3. 好莱坞the Hollywood

4. 中央公园the Central Park

本期巩固练习参考范文

My Trip to America

In the winter vacation, my parents and I took a wonderful trip to America. Our first destination was the Grand Canyon National Park. When I saw the cliffs, I was amazed by their beauty. I couldn’t help crying out how wonderful the sight was. The next day we went to the Hollywood, the movie capital of the world. We saw some classic movies there. Before we left, we paid a visit to the famous Central Park in New York. That was our last destination. We took photos there, and had a picnic in the park. I enjoyed the trip so much that I’m looking forward to another one next holiday.

13. Art

写作指导

●写作任务:

某英文报社为了纪念世界著名的意大利歌唱家帕瓦罗蒂(Luciano Pavarotti)去世一周年,准备举办一次英语征文比赛。请你根据以下参考资料,写一篇短文简要介绍他的生平。(词数:120左右)

帕瓦罗蒂,19xx年10月12日生于意大利。19xx年,5岁的他就开始用他的第一把吉他伴奏唱一些民歌。19xx年,他在纽约一个著名大歌剧院演出,并取得了巨大成功。19xx年,他携手另外两位当代最杰出的男高音歌唱家在罗马首次成功举办了大型音乐会。20xx年12月,帕瓦罗蒂全球巡演到达中国。20xx年9月6日在家中去世。

●写作分析:

本次写作任务要求根据材料介绍一个人物,在体裁方面属于记叙文。在文章时态方面,因为帕瓦罗蒂已经去世,所以记叙他的生平和取得的成就都要使用过去时。在人称方面,应该使用第三人称。

●初稿:

Luciano Pavarotti was a famous opera singer in the world. He was born in Italy, on October 12, 1935. In 1940, when he was five years old he began to sing folk songs with his first guitar. In 1972, Pavarotti performed at an opera in New York, which got great success. In 1990, Pavarotti and two other famous singers held a concert successfully. In December, 2005, Pavarotti gave good performances in China, which left unforgettable impression to Chinese audience.

Pavarotti passed away at his home in Italy on September 6, 2007. As a world-famous artist, the death of Pavarotti brought deep sorrow to the people who love him.

●教师点评:

初稿的优点在于文章的开头和结尾呼应得非常好,使文章的整体性很强。文章将帕瓦罗蒂的童年和他所取得的成就描写得都很详细,也使用了一些复杂句型。但是仍然存在一些不足之处:表述事件的句型太单调,都是先写时间,再写人物,最后写事件,不免读起来有些枯燥乏味。

●成稿:

Luciano Pavarotti, a famous opera singer, was born in Italy on October 12, 1935. He was born to be a singer. When he was only five years old, he began to sing songs with his first guitar. Pavarotti did not become famous until 1972, when he gave a performance at a big opera house in New York. After the performance, the audience clapped and cheered for a long time. In 1990, Pavarotti, together with two other great singers, held a concert successfully in Rome. In December, 2005 Pavarotti also won the Chinese audience’s heart with his wonderful performance.

Pavarotti passed away on September 6, 2007. As one of the greatest singers in the world, his death brought deep sorrow to the people around the world.

●教师点评:

成稿既覆盖了所有要点,又将写作任务所给出的参考资料进行了认真分析,斟酌选取,适当扩展,添加了一些细节和评价,使得每个事件之间过渡自然,例如:He was born to be a singer.

而且对每个事件的描写使用了多样化的句型。尤其是"Pavarotti did not become famous until 1972, when he gave a performance at a big opera house in New York. After the performance, the audience clapped and cheered for a long time.",不但用"not ... until ..."句型表达出帕瓦罗蒂的首次巨大成功,而且用"the audience clapped and cheered for a long time"来形象地表现出观众对帕瓦罗蒂的认可。这种灵活使用语言、生动活泼的表现手法,非常值得同学们借鉴。 ●Powerful Sentences:

1. With the popularity of the Internet, it is more convenient for us to download our favorite songs and enjoy them.

2. The world-famous painter, ... , painted in such an amazing way that many generations of people have been studying his works.

3. The books are about magic and fantastic adventures, but they still teach us about real life. ●巩固练习:

假如你的美国朋友对中国的相声艺术(crosstalk)产生了浓厚的兴趣,并向你询问有关知识。请你为他简单介绍一下中国的这门传统艺术。(词数:110左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

Crosstalk is only done in China. Crosstalk has a long history, which dates back to the Qing Dynasty (1644-1911). At that time, two performers brought laughter to audiences by telling jokes and funny stories. Nowadays, crosstalk is a little different. It can be performed by one person or even a group of people. They often talk about real things in society in an artistic and funny way. In recent years, some people have come to China to learn crosstalk because it is a traditional artistic form that is accepted by people of different ages. The more you learn about it, the more interested you will become in it.

14. Art and Literature

写作任务:

你们学校在学期末举办了一次艺术节(art festival)。请按下列要点写一篇120词左右的文章:

①你们班要在星期五下午聚会以庆祝艺术节。

②先是音乐、舞蹈活动。

③接下来是各种比赛。

④5点钟以后是最激动人心的节目——烹饪比赛。

⑤虽然艺术节结束了,但你们仍意犹未尽。

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务为根据提示写一篇关于学校艺术节的记叙文。注意记叙文的六要素:时间、地点、人物、事件、原因、结果,英语里叫做when、where、who、what、why和how。并且还要注意文章所用的时态为过去时。

2. 提示给出了时间先后顺序,"先是"、"接下来"、"5点钟以后",注意合理安排文章顺序和段落。可以用一些表示时间先后顺序的词:at first, first, then, afterwards, following that, meanwhile, several minutes later, later on, soon, finally, at last.

3. 本文给的提示点比较多,注意审清题,可以先列出内容提纲。

初稿:

Our school held an art festival at the end of the term. On Friday afternoon, our class had a party to celebrate the festival.

First we had music and dance. My friend Mary sang a pop song. And some others gave us dances. All these made us very happy.

Then we had some competitions. The most exciting program is the cooking competition after 5 pm. Each group had to make some special dishes. At once students became cooks; they are very happy, though most of them cook by themselves for the first time. At seven o’clock all dishes were ready. "Oh, they taste delicious," we all said happily.

At last we have to finish our party.

教师点评:

本文基本概括了提示要点,叙述清晰,前后顺序安排合理。但也有一些不足:

1. 结尾缺少了最后一个提示要点中的"意犹未尽"。

2. 文中时态混乱。3. 文中多次使用同样的修饰词happy / happily,词汇量显得贫乏。 成稿:

Our school held an art festival at the end of the term. On Friday afternoon, our class had a party to celebrate the festival.

First we had music and dancing. My friend Mary sang a pop song. Some others danced for us. We were all very happy.

Then we had one competition after another. Before we knew it, it was five o’clock. The most exciting program began: the cooking competition. Each group had to make some special dishes. The students had turned into cooks, though they couldn’t tell salt from sugar the day before.

At last we had to finish our party. When we said goodbye to each other, we had the same feeling in our hearts: We want to have more wonderful times at school.

教师点评:

本文覆盖了题目要求的所有要点,结构完整,层次清晰。文章开头总的介绍学校举办艺术节。接下来从第二段开始就具体叙述作者所在的班为庆祝艺术节而举办的一次聚会,以点代面,烘托整体。写班里的聚会时,从低潮向高潮展开,先写唱歌、舞蹈,再写烹任比赛,使聚会达到高潮。最后,作者写出同学们一致的心愿:学生在紧张的学习之余,需要生动活泼的娱乐活动。本文语言流畅自然,是篇中学生不可多得的好文章。

Powerful Phrases:(叙述事情经过)

first / at the beginning

next

at the same time / meanwhile then half an hour later / after a while / after that after they finished ... later on

finally / in the end / at last

巩固练习:

请以你最喜欢的一本书或一部电影(如《海底总动员》)为题,写一篇文章简要叙述故事的经过。(词数120左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

My Favorite Film: Finding Nemo

I love watching films, especially cartoons. My favorite one is Finding Nemo. It’s a tale of an interesting and exciting journey of two fish: Marlin and his son Nemo. Nemo lost his mother when he was very young, and it was his father Marlin who brought him up. On Nemo’s first day of school, he was caught by a diver and taken to live in a fish tank in a doctor’s office. Marlin and his new friend Dory set out across the ocean to find Nemo. At the same time, Nemo and his tankmates were trying to find a way to get out of the tank before he became the doctor’s niece’s new pet. In the end, the father and son met again after many adventures in the sea.

15. Back to the Past

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你班准备以"国外古老建筑"为主题创建一个英语角,在每张建筑的照片下附一张英文卡片,介绍它的主要信息。请你为大英博物馆制作一张卡片,应包括以下要点:

1. 大英博物馆(the British Museum)始建于1753年,是世界上最早的博物馆之一。

2. 共有100多个陈列室,面积六万多平方米,藏有展品400多万件。

3. 其收藏的艺术品极其丰富,其中以埃及馆、希腊馆和罗马馆最引人注目。

4. 还以其图书馆闻名。这里曾是马克思(Carl Marx)收集资料写作的主要场所,许多参观者慕名前来寻找马克思当年常坐的座位。

写作分析:

1. 文体为说明文,宜用一般现在时。

2. 要点较多,注意恰当衔接。

3. 切忌简单生硬地翻译要点。

初稿:

The British Museum in London was established in 1753, and is one of the oldest museums in the whole world. It owns more than 4,000,000 pieces of exhibits. It has more than one hundred showrooms and covers more than 60,000 square meters in all. There are a large number of artworks, including ones from Egypt, Greece and Rome. It is also famous for its library. Carl Marx once collected information and wrote there. A lot of visitors came there to visit his working place. The British Museum shows the ancient cultures of all human beings, so it is a good place for scientists and the public to learn about the past.

教师点评:

文章要点全面,语句通顺,用词基本准确,也做到了前后呼应。

但是句子变化较少,因而文章显得呆板。此外,作者没能正确理解第3个要点的意思,因而没有把埃及馆、希腊馆和罗马馆的突出性彰显出来。

成稿:

Established in 1753, the British Museum in London is now one of the oldest and most famous museums in the world. There are more than 4,000,000 things in the exhibition, with more than one hundred showrooms. And it covers over 60,000 square meters. Of all the exhibits, the most famous ones are from Egypt, Greece and Rome. The museum is also world-famous for its library, where Carl Marx often collected information for his own writing. Many visitors go there to see the place where that great man once worked. The British Museum shows us many things about ancient cultures and events in history, so it is a truly wonderful place.

教师点评:

1. 文章开头既生动活泼,又提领全文,突出了大英博物馆的重要地位。

2. 句式变化多,灵活应用了限制性定语从句和非限制性定语从句,文章生动,有层次。

3. 文章前后呼应,浑然一体。

巩固练习:

假如你是李华,"五·一"在去敦煌莫高窟旅游的路上遇见了一位美国小朋友Lucy,并与她

英语写作指导及范文

参考词汇:

莫高窟Mogao Grottoes n.

佛教Buddhism n.

壁画mural n.;

遗产heritage n.

本期写作指导参考范文

I’d like to tell you something about Mogao Grottoes. It is located in Dunhuang City in the northwest of China. It has more than 1,600 years of history. After many generations, it has become the biggest historical place for Buddhism, with 735 caves, and 45,000 square meters of colorful murals made over many, many years. It has such an important place in human culture that UNESCO added it into the list of World Cultural Heritage Sites in 1987. Every year, visitors from home and abroad come to this amazing land, and admire the wisdom of ancient Chinese people. We are very proud of this place and I’m sure you will enjoy this trip.

16. Between Parents and Us

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你们班开展了一次关于"父母与子女关系"的英语主题班会,有的同学认为双方的关系应该是平等的,有的同学认为子女应该服从父母。请你写一篇短文总结这次主题班会的讨论结果,并谈谈你个人的想法。(词数: 120左右)

写作分析:

1. 这是一篇总结观点的文章,宜用一般现在时。

该文体通常采用"三段式"写作结构:导入话题——议论主体——结果/总结。这种结构的优点是使观点更突出、结构更明了,且可达到前后照应的目的。2. 写作提示是同学们的两种观点,比较抽象,写作时应予以阐述。这是本文的写作难点。

初稿:

Our class had a heated discussion about the relationship between our parents and us. We had different opinions, and generally they can be divided into two kinds.

All of us were very interested in the topic of family relationship, because many of us face the problem of generation gap. We spoke out our opinions actively. Some students thought that the relationship should be equal. Some students thought that children should obey their parents. It should be pointed out that parents and children love each other. So we should take active attitude towards this problem.

教师点评:

1. 作者基本完成了写作任务,覆盖了要点。

2. 第二段意思混乱,结构不清晰。作者写了一些与主题无关的话,却没有对观点进行阐述,致使观点显得孤立,内容单薄。

成稿:

Our class had a heated discussion about the relationship between parents and us. We had different opinions, which could be divided into two sides.

Some think that the relationship should be equal. They believe that an equal relationship leads to a good relationship in the family. Parents and children should get along with each other like friends.

Others hold the view that parents should have the most power because they have a lot of experience. Children are expected to listen to their parents. It is necessary for parents to tell their children what to do.

In my opinion, parents and children should spend time exchanging ideas. In this way, it will be easier for them to understand each other.

教师点评:

1. 本文采取了"三段式"的写作手法,条理清晰、结构合理。

2. 作者先把双方观点写出来,然后分两段进行阐述,观点鲜明、理由充分、内容丰富。 Powerful Expressions:

(开头)

1. We had a heated discussion about ...

2. We have different opinions about / on ...

3. Our opinions are divided into two sides.

4. Our opinions are as follows.

(结尾)

1. In short, / In a word, it can be said that ...

2. Every coin has two sides, so it is hard to tell which is better.

3. It may be briefly summed up as follows.

4. From what has been mentioned above, we can come to the conclusion that ...

巩固练习:

假如你叫李华,你的美国网友Bob向你抱怨他的父母不理解他,请你给他发一封e-mail劝慰他,并就如何加强父母与孩子之间的沟通提出几点建议。(词数:120左右)

本期参考范文

Dear Bob,

I’m sorry to hear that your parents don’t understand you. It seems that both you and your parents don’t understand each other. You must remember that they love you and you should also know that it is not only your parents who are responsible for your problems. You need to make an effort to change things too. Try communicating with your parents by telling them about your life at school. Share your life with your parents and listen to their ideas. Day by day, you will slowly begin to understand why they are doing these things. When you really understand them, you will know that they are trying to help you and give you what you need. Just remember to talk more with your parents and your relationship should get better.

Best wishes!

Yours,

Li Hu

17. Biography of a Person

写作指导

▲写作任务:

假设你是某中学生英语报的兼职小作者,受约为该报纸"人物志"的栏目撰稿,请你根据提示内容写一篇人物传记。马克·吐温,美国十九世纪最著名的作家之一。1835年生于美国密苏里州密西西比河畔的一个小村庄。12岁的时候父亲去世。之后的10年,他在很多城市的印刷厂里工作过。成年后曾在密西西比河的船上当水手,也就是在这个时候,他开始写短篇小说。马克·吐温是其笔名,意为水文测深标上的"两个刻度"。马克·吐温写过许多小说,其中最著名的是《汤姆·索亚历险记》。他的作品被译成多国文字,深受全世界读者的喜爱。注意:可根据内容要点适当增加细节使行文连贯;不得逐字翻译;可适当针对主题进行发挥。

词数:120左右;

参考词汇:密苏里州Missouri密西西比河the Mississippi River《汤姆·索亚历险记》The Adventures of Tom Sawyer杰作masterpiece刻度mark

▲任务分析:

本次写作任务是人物传记,属于记叙文体的一种。人物传记一般是对一个人的一生或目前取得的成就做一个概括或总结。人物传记的写法一般是介绍人物的成长经历(包括生活、工作和学习)并辅以对人物功绩成败的评论,有时也可以在记叙成长经历的同时加入一些议论。其中对人物生平的介绍要包括出生日期和地点(Birthday and birth place)、家庭背景(Family background)、教育(Education)和人生大事(Big events in his or her life)几个方面,对人物经历进行介绍要遵循时间顺序。就本次写作任务而言,我们注意到中文介绍就是按照这一顺序展开的。因此,今后在写类似的人物传记时,我们都可以从以上几个方面展开。在本次任务中,我们需要注意以下几点:

1. 灵活处理中文内容。写作要求明确规定不得和中文一一对译,因此,在语言的表达和信息的选择上就需要变通,即并非所有提示都是有效信息,作者可以根据对人物刻画的不同需要选择有用信息。

2. 在提示信息基础上适当扩充。中文资料只是参考,要想成功完成一篇人物传记还需要作者对写作对象有更多的了解。将文章在提示信息基础上扩充得更加饱满也是一次再创造。概括起来,写人物传记要以时间为序组织材料、概括人物一生;突出人物重点活动,介绍人物思想精髓,详略安排要得当。

▲初稿:

Mark Twain is famous for a writer. He is one of the greatest writers in the 19th century. Born in a small Missouri village near the Mississippi River in 1835, his father died as he was very young. And since then, he began to make his own living. He was working in printing shops in many cities for 10 years. And later, he became a sailor on the Mississippi and he got his pen-name "Mark Twain". It means two marks. He started to write short articles. In his life, he created many masterpieces, and the most famous is The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. His works are translated into many languages and introduced to many countries. In my opinion, he is a great writer. ▲教师点评:

文章要点齐全,时态准确,但文章也有明显的缺陷:

1. 文章只是对原中文内容进行简单翻译,未进行材料的重组整合,信息要点显得零乱分散。修改时要注意使用连接词,适当增删信息,使全文详略得当。

2. 作者对马克·吐温的成长经历叙述有余,对其作品的介绍不足,未能突出其作为作家的知名度及其成就,成稿要注意这两部分内容的调整。

3. 句式表达上也有不妥之处,如"born in ... his father ..."这一句话,前一分句的逻辑主语是Mark Twain,而后一分句的主语则成了"his father",导致逻辑混乱。由于两句表达不同意思,并无太大关联性,因此可以分为两句。再如"famous for"后加原由,而famous as后加职业身份。在此处作者想表达"他是著名作家"的含义,建议换为"famous as a writer"为好。再就是as和when的用法区分。As和when 引导时间状语从句的区别是:when强调的是某个时间点,而as强调的是动作伴随的状态。例如:"As you grow up, you will acquire more and more knowledge about the world."意为"随着你的成长,你会对世界了解得更多。"When I grow up, I will become a teacher."意为"我长大以后当老师。"文中"his father died as he was very young."一句中的"as"应改为"when"。

▲成稿:

Mark Twain is one of the greatest writers in the world.

He was born in a small Missouri town on the Mississippi River in 1835. His father died when

he was only twelve years old. For the following 10 years, he worked in printing shops in many cities. Then he became a riverboat pilot. During this period, he started to write short articles in his spare time. It was at this time that he adopted the pen-name "Mark Twain", which means two marks. This was used on the riverboats at the time to tell how high the water was. In the following years, he wrote the novel The Adventures of Tom Sawyer which is one of his most famous works. His masterpieces now have been translated into many languages.

He is not only a great writer but also a famous humorist.

▲赏析:

这篇文章写得不错,不仅涵盖了要点内容,而且句型结构也较为丰富。文中所用的词汇虽然都很平实,但是比较得体。另外,文中还有效地使用了语句间的连接成分,使全文结构紧凑,过渡自然。

Powerful Sentences:

1. The people have come to regard him as an inspiring leader.

2. He devotes his life to ...

3. We regard ... as our role model.

4. People speak highly of him and all respect him.

5. ... has been praised for his ...

巩固练习:

请你为校刊"Figure"栏目写一篇稿件,描述你心目中的英雄。要求:逻辑清楚词数:120左右

本期参考范文

Jay is one of the talent musicians and singers I admire most. His talent and persistence in music is really touching. As a boy, Jay was called dull and stupid. But his mother noticed that the quiet, shy boy seemed to dance when he heard western pop music she used to play. He was sent to a piano school at the age of 4. After he had grown up, he developed the ability to instantly play anything that he heard. However, he did not rise to fame instantly. He was laughed at as a bizarre man. He never gave up his dream when others denied him. Instead, he concentrated on his music and finally made a big breakthrough. I admire Jay because he has tried his best to change his life and make the grade.

18. Buildings and Living

写作任务:

假设你是李华,你的美国朋友Mary 要来你校学习,并请你帮她找一个住处。你根据报纸上的广告帮她找到了一处住房。请你回信给她介绍住房情况及周围的居住环境。(词数:120左右)提示内容如下:

单元房出租

1. 两室一厅,月租金1000元,家具齐全。

2. 交通便捷,地铁站和汽车站距住处500米左右。

3. 附近的设施有:医院,购物商场,公园和电影院等。

参考词汇:

rent n.租金; convenient adj.方便的; shopping mall n.购物商场

写作分析:

1. 题目明确要求是回复书信,使用第一人称,时态使用一般现在时。

2. 要点提纲如下:

(1) an apartment (two bedrooms and a living room)

(2) convenient to live

(3) There is ... nearby.

初稿:

Dear Mary,

I received your letter, and I’m very glad to know that you are going to come to China and study in our school. I have found an apartment for you. It has two bedrooms and a living room. There is some furniture that you can use in it. It lies in the city center and near the bus stop and the subway, which are about 500 meters away. The rent is 1,000 yuan per month.

You will feel it convenient to live there. There is a hospital, shopping mall, cinema and park nearby. You can enjoy yourself there. I feel it is a suitable place for you. But if you don’t like it, you can let me know, and I will look for another one for you.

I am looking forward to seeing you.

Li Hua

教师点评:

这篇习作的优点在于作者在信中完整地表述了写作内容。文章的开头及结尾也富有人情味,达到了与目标读者交流的目的。

不足之处在于中西方思维方式的不同造成了某些语言应用的失误。

1. 开头啰嗦。不符合西方开门见山式的思维方式。我们写信时开头习惯说"收到你的来信,我很高兴,得知你要来我校上学我也很高兴等等",在西方的语言交流中,却更习惯于简单地说"I am glad to know that you are coming to China and studying in our school."

2. 西方思维更重视文字间的逻辑关系。例如,此房有两室一厅和家具,中文中看似是并列和排比的关系,但用英文表达则应为"It is a two-bedroom unit with a living room and it is fully fur-nished."

3. 某些表述欠妥。例如:"You will feel it convenient to live there."中的"feel"改为"find"更合适。又如:"I feel it is a suitable place for you."中的"feel"最好改为"think"。

成稿:

Dear Mary,

I am glad to know that you are coming to China and studying in our school. I have found an apartment for you. It is a two-bedroom unit with a living room and it is fully furnished. It is located in the city center, close to the bus stop and the subway. They are about 500 meters away. The rent is 1,000 yuan per month.

You will find it convenient and fun to live there. If you don’t feel well, the hospital is just around the corner. A shopping mall, a movie theater, and a park are also very close to the apartment. In your spare time, you can go shopping, watch a movie, or go for a walk in the park.

It is a nice apartment and will meet your needs well. Please feel free to let me know if you have any question or if you’d like me to look for another unit.

Look forward to seeing you!

Li Hua

教师点评:

这封书信比初稿更流畅,语言使用更地道。改掉了初稿中语言表达不妥之处,尤其是"Please feel free to let me know if you have any question or if you’d like me to look for another unit. "这一句,非常值得同学们学习,它恰到好处得表达了"如果你不满意请让我知道,我很高

兴为你再找一间"。

要想解决由于思维方式所造成的语言应用失误的根本办法是善于发现两种语言文化之间的差异,模仿地道英语的表达方式,日积月累自然会写出地道的英语句子。

Powerful Sentences:

1. It’s a small flat of 25 square meters, with a bedroom and a kitchen.

2. As is expected, it’s near the school where you’ll study.

3. It’s large enough for a single person like you to live in.

4. It is well equipped; therefore you can wash your clothes and do the dishes by yourself.

5. Let me introduce something to you in details about the house.

巩固练习

假如你是王明,你预计在下学期去美国的某中学学习,想让你的美国笔友Bob帮你在该校附近找一间公寓居住。请你给他写封信,说明你对住处的要求。(词数:120左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Bob,

How is it going recently? I have good news to tell you. I’m going to study abroad in your school next fall, and we will meet each other then.

Would you please help me to find an apartment? I hope to find a clean and bright house, and not very far from our school, so that I can go to school by bike. It would be wonderful if there is a cinema or a supermarket nearby, which would make my life very colorful.

Thanks a lot for your kindness. Please tell me if you get any information about it. I’m looking forward to seeing you.

Yours,

Wang Ming

19. Communication

写作指导

● 写作任务:

2008北京奥运会招募外国志愿者

要求:1. 报名者的年龄下限为16岁;2. 具备基本的汉语交流能力;3. 要求能够在北京奥运会期间至少服务7天,具备志愿者服务的基本知识。申请人可登录

进行报名,报名时间截止到6月30日。

假设你叫,你有一位美国笔友Kevin。他在美国一所孔子学院学习中文,对中国文化很感兴趣。上次通信他告诉你打算暑假来北京。看了这则启事后你觉得他很适合招募志愿者的要求,应该去试一试。请按以上要点给他写信告知此事,并表示可以提供帮助。

注意:

1. 词数: 100左右;2. 可适当增加细节,以使行文连贯;3. 参考词汇:deadline n. 最终期限recruit v.招募Confucius college 孔子学院

●分析:

本次的写作任务是要求用书信的形式转述一则消息,文章要涵盖启事中的所有要点,不能遗漏。除此之外,这封信还有一个目的,即希望Kevin看信后能对志愿者招募活动产生兴趣并报名参加。因此在转述消息时要有技巧地把Kevin的个人情况和这些要求相结合,从而达到说服的目的。在具体写作中,我们可以使用两种方法来构造文章:

1. "点——点"对应。文章开头在转述招募志愿者的消息后即提出让Kevin报名参加的建议。接着将启事中的每一点具体要求与Kevin的自身情况结合起来,说服Kevin参加招募。

2. "面——面"结合。这封信包含两个方面的要素:信息传达和说服,因此文章也可以从这两方面展开。第一部分介绍启事信息,以自己的建议为承上启下的过渡句,引出第二部分对Kevin个人情况的描述,说明他符合招募条件。注意在转述消息时,切忌逐字逐句的翻译。在把Kevin的个人情况和要求相结合的时候要突出Kevin最具优势的特点,这样才能使说服更有力。

●初稿:

Dear Kevin,

I saw a news that 2008 Beijing Olympic Games would recruit foreign volunteers. I think you are studying Chinese in Confucius College in America and you are able to speak basic Chinese. So I think you could take a try. And you’re 16 years old, meeting their requirement. And the Beijing Olympic Games will be held during your summer vacation, which makes it possible for you to serve 7 days at least. Your former volunteer experience will help you a lot. The deadline for application is June 30th. You could apply for it at . If you need, I can help you!

Yours,

Li Wei

●教师点评:

作者只是简单地翻译了题目中的要求,对信息的介绍也只是单纯地罗列,没有任何的发挥,缺乏层次感。另外,句子之间没有过渡,频繁使用and显得表达较为单调。语法和用词上的错误较多,具体表现在:

1.中式英语的痕迹明显,表达不准确。在文中,作者多次使用了I think,但I think一般表示不太肯定的语气,在英语中大多数情况下都是可以省略不用的。结尾句"If you need, I can help you!"是中式英语,正确的说法是:If you need any help, don’t hesitate to call me!

2. 语法方面:news是不可数名词,"一条新闻"应该说a piece of news,这句话可以说: I saw a piece of news. / I got some news. 再者,2008 Beijing Olympic Games前应该加定冠词the。

3. 标点符号使用不当。"I think you are studying Chinese in Confucius College in America and you are able to speak basic Chinese."和"So I think you could take a try"应该是一句话,用逗号连接。

●成稿:

Dear Kevin,

I read a piece of news about foreign volunteers at the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. Since you are such a fantastic Chinese learner, I think you more than meet the requirements listed.

As far as I know, you are 17 years old, which meets the age requirement of being a 16-year-old at least. Moreover, your fluent Chinese is undoubtedly beyond the basic communicating ability they require. In addition, your previous volunteer experience enables you to excel in this position. I know you will spend your summer holiday in Beijing, so you will be able to serve seven days at least, the minimum required. The deadline for application is June 30th, so you must hurry to register at . If you need any help, don’t hesitate to call me!

Yours,

Li Wei

●成稿赏析:

文章涵盖了要点内容,条理清晰,并根据内容展开了合理发挥,如提到Kevin的年龄、以前的志愿者经验和暑假的安排等。文中还运用了多变的句式结构,如:插入语(As far as I know),连接词或词组(Moreover, In addition),原因状语从句(Since you are such a fantastic Chinese learner, I think you more than meet the requirements listed.),非限制性定语从句(which meets the age requirement of being a 16-year-old at least)。此外,文章还用到了一些闪光词汇,如:a fantastic Chinese learner, excel, enable ... to等。文中结尾处用语也比较得体。

●Powerful sentences:

1. I think you are competent for this job.

2. You are a student of Confucius College and have specialized in Chinese, which enables you to meet the requirement of fluency in Chinese.

3. Your abundant experience as a volunteer makes you perfect for the job, not to mention your fluency in Chinese communication.

4. If you need any help, please don’t hesitate to contact me.

●巩固练习:

某外语网站正在举行话题为"The Importance of Communication"的征文活动,请你写一篇100词左右的短文,向这个网站投稿。

本期参考范文

Communication serves as a bridge in our daily lives. Although new technologies are changing traditional ways of communicating, I think communication by language can never truly be replaced. Lost in a strange city, I always ask the local people for directions. A kind reply can solve my problems immediately and shorten the distance between two hearts as well. While studying, communication with others improves my progress, for example, a heated discussion provides any opportunity for every student to give his or her own opinion and learn from others. When we study English, a face-to-face chat with a foreigner is wonderful for improving our oral English. Everyone needs to communicate with others; that way the world will become a more beautiful and peaceful place.

20. Computers

写作指导

●写作任务:

英语课上,老师给大家展示了一系列机器人模型来说明机器人时代已经到来,其中一款吹喇叭的机器人尤其引人注目,请你根据下图所示及参考信息,写一篇英文短文。参考资料:

高:120cm重:35kg功能:可吹奏乐器;四肢可自由移动;可独立完成如开门、扫地等任务。

要求:1. 描写清楚有序;2. 展开合理想象;3. 词数120左右。

●任务分析:

本次写作任务要求对实物进行说明介绍,考查的是对信息的组织能力。介绍一个实物时,应首先对实物的形状、大小、颜色、材质等外部特征进行描写,以使读者对所描述对象有一个基本的形象概念。但仅仅描写这些外部特征是不够的,还需要根据具体实物的特征进行深入拓展,如物品的功能、历史及价值等等。这样才能使读者全面、深入地认识并了解所描述的对象。另外,通过观察图片和阅读参考资料,我们得到的都只是静态信息,要使文章更加生动、形象,我们还需要加入合理的想象。就本次写作任务而言,我们可以分为三个部分来展开说明:

1. 首先介绍这个机器人的来历或第一眼给人造成的视觉震撼。这样做是为了突出说明机器人的显著特点之后再依次介绍其它特点,以达到吸引眼球的效果。

2. 对机器人的特征逐一进行说明。在对事物进行描写时要遵循一定的顺序。我们可以按照从整体到细节、从上到下、从具体到抽象的顺序进行描写。在这一部分我们还可加入对机器人功能及和人的互动方面的联想,使它的形象变得更生动有趣。3. 在描写结束后,我们还可以对机器人的发展前景进行展望以保持文章的完整。

初稿:

With the current level of technological development, robots are more and more common in our daily lives. Due to their convenience, robots are welcomed by all kinds of families. Now let me introduce a robot that can sing. The robot is 120cm tall and 35kg in weight. Its arms can move like a human’s so that it can play musical instruments like us. It is also worth mentioning that its lips can open, so that it can sing. In addition, it can also help the elderly open doors, clean the floor and so on.

The company invented such robot to help take care of old people. And it can also make their retirement more colorful. In a word, this robot is really clever and lovely.

●教师点评:

这篇文章涵盖了写作任务的所有要点内容,四段式的结构使文章层次分明,基本完成了写作要求。只是本文在精练和想象力上显得有些薄弱,主要表现在以下几个方面:

1. 科技发展的大背景虽然不错,但套用在本文显得生硬而牵强,建议删掉。这也提醒我们,"With the current level of technological development, ... more and more ... "的模版并非万能于所有科技文章。

2.全篇大部分句子都是以it或its ...开头,句子之间缺少衔接,只是简单生硬地堆砌,无法体现生动性和形象性,建议变换句式表达,使语言丰富。另外表达"能够"这一意义时,除了用can外,还可以用be able to,has the ability of ...来表达。

3. 作者没有充分发挥想象力,对机器人与人的互动这一话题用open doors, clean the floor两个短语一笔带过,让读者感觉机器人仍然是一个冰冷的工具而缺乏生动性。

●成稿:

As we can see from the picture, the robot is playing a trumpet. It has lips that move with the same finesse as human lips. With its hands, it is able to play a musical instrument as a human would do.

In addition to its musical talent, it can carry out a wide variety of tasks by using its hands. For example, open doors and clean the floor. With a height of 120cm, and a weight of 35kg, the robot walks on two legs similar to a person, making it easy to become accustomed to, especially for old people. The company developed this robot in order to care for the elderly and children. And his ability to sing can make their life colorful.

●成稿赏析:

本文不仅如实地介绍了图片内容,还加入了个人的想象,在内容上显得饱满且生动;同时,在文章的结构上,作者的思路清晰,重点介绍了机器人的特点,并且对其功能和设计设想进行了合理想象,这样的安排值得借鉴。语言的表达上,介词短语和分词结构的交叉使用使得整篇文章连贯顺畅。

●Powerful sentences:

1. The picture above shows ...

2. It is not only able to sing, but it can also do daily tasks.

3. This robot is designed for the elderly, and can enrich their retirement.

●巩固练习:

周末你们班组织去古生物博物馆参观,其中图片展馆中一幅关于恐龙的图片给你留下了深刻印象,请你根据下图所示写一篇短文作为学校英语科技周的参赛文章。

本期巩固练习参考

A little boy stands in front of a picture of a giant dinosaur, as if the dinosaur were coming up to him. He can’t help wondering, "Will dinosaurs return?"

As everyone knows, dinosaurs died out millions of years ago. And the cause of their extinction troubles scientists to this day. Based on fossil evidence, scientists are working on copying a dinosaur. I believe that the development of technology may enable the return of the dinosaurs some day. However, if the dinosaurs came back, could they survive in such a polluted environment? In addition, could humans be kind enough to this rare species? Who can guarantee that the dinosaurs would be able to live peacefully with us?

21. Cultural Relics

◆写作任务:

假如你是王明,在暑假游览泰山时看到有些游客随意乱扔垃圾以及乱写乱画,有些古迹已经遭到严重破坏。请你给某英文报社写一封信反映这些情况,并对如何保护国家文化遗产提出一些建议。(词数:120左右)

◆写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是一篇书信体裁的作文。

2. 本文应使用第一人称,时态应主要使用一般过去时和一般现在时。

3. 展开书信写作时,开头要简要介绍旅游时所见到的人们乱扔垃圾或破坏当地环境的现象,然后就如何改变现状给出自己的建议,结尾最好用一些呼吁性的话语。在提建议时可适当发挥,但也要注意紧扣主题,切勿偏离主题内容。

◆初稿:

Dear Editor,

Some days ago I visited Mount Tai and I am worried about it. I saw some of the cultural relics there have been destroyed badly. Rubbish like paper and wasted bottles is thrown about by visitors. Some even draw pictures or their names on the old trees. Thousands of tourists visit Mount Tai every day. If the visitors don’t pay attention to it, the cultural relics will be destroyed. I am worried that part of the history will be lost. So I think first of all, more announcement of protecting our places of interest should be made. Maybe we can make a website about it. Second, the government should put glass wall in front of the old wall. Let’s protect our cultural relics together.

Yours,

Wang Ming

◆教师点评:

这篇习作优点在于完成了题目规定的要求,所使用的词汇和语法结构基本准确,能满足写作任务的要求,基本达到写作目的。不足之处在于:

1. 本文开头有些词语使用不当,指代不清。

2. 可以看出作者在尝试使用一些复杂的语法结构和词汇,但运用不准确,表达有误。

3. 个别句子时态上有错误。

◆成稿:

Dear Editor,

A few days ago I visited Mount Tai. I became very worried about the cultural sites there after I saw how badly damaged some of them were. Some people threw paper and empty bottles everywhere, and others drew pictures or wrote their names on the old trees.

Thousands of tourists visit Mount Tai every day. If the visitors don’t pay attention to their behaviors, the cultural sites will be destroyed. I am worried that part of our history will be lost. I strongly suggest that we encourage people to protect our cultural relics. Maybe we can make a website about it. At the same time, the government should put the glass wall in front of some of the most important places.

The 2008 Olympic Games are coming. Let’s keep Mount Tai beautiful and welcome our dear guests from all over the world to a beautiful and clean country.Yours, Wang Ming

◆教师点评:

1. 本文覆盖了题目要求的所有要点,结构完整,层次清楚。文章语言流畅、自然,提出的建议切合实际,容易被人们接受。

2. 本文运用了较地道的表达法,如:I strongly suggest that we encourage people to protect our cultural relics.

3. 结尾结合20xx年奥运会的到来呼吁大家保护环境,更是起到了号召作用。

◆Powerful Sentences:

1. Tourism contributes a lot to international understanding.

2. With so much contact between people from different places, the exchange of cultures and ideas is sure to be improved.

3. Since visitors are especially fond of ..., some new industries are developing rapidly to meet their demands.

4. It is everyone’s responsibility to protect the cultural relics.

5. We know that lots of cultural sites are being destroyed.

6. Immediate and effective measures should be taken to protect ...

◆巩固练习:

假如今年暑假爸爸带你到北京旅游,去了长城和故宫,请你以此为内容写一篇120词左右的游记。题目为"A Visit to Beijing"。具体内容包括:

1. 第一站:长城(绵延6000多公里,为防御外敌入侵而建)

2. 第二站:故宫(有很多的展览,最喜欢青铜器展)参考词汇:Forbidden City故宫; bronze n.青铜

本期写作指导参考范文

A Visit to Beijing

This summer holiday, I went to Beijing with my father. It was the first time that I had been to our capital city. It left a deep impression on me. First I went to the Great Wall. It is more than 6,000 kilometers long. The Great Wall was built over two thousand years ago. It was built to keep the enemy out of the nation. I was very surprised when I went to the Forbidden City, which is located in the center of Beijing. I spent about three hours walking around, reading and enjoying the exhibits there. Various collections there were very interesting, especially the ancient bronze exhibit. There seemed to be endless things to see. I had a wonderful summer holiday and am looking forward to visiting Beijing again.

22. Culture Shock

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你的一位朋友Mark去英国留学,因为文化的不同,在他与同学们交往的过程中产生了一些摩擦,影响了他的学习和生活,这使他很苦恼。请你给他写一封信来帮助他走出困境,从而更好地适应生活。内容要点:

1. 分析原因;

2. 提出建议;

3. 表达祝愿。

写作要求:

1. 思路清晰,语言有条理;

2. 词数:120左右。

●写作分析:

本文要求给Mark写信来帮助他解决困难,属于建议型或问题解决型的书信写作。这种类型的写作重点在分析原因并提出解决对策上。文章一般分为三个部分:阐明写信的目的——分析问题、阐述原因——提供解决方案和建议。由于文章是以书信形式展开,因此除了已给出的写作框架外,还不能忽视信函的交际性目的。

就本次写作任务而言,解决与同学们交往过程中产生的摩擦是写信的原由,文章的重点在于对问题的分析和解决。信件第一部分可以简单表达一下对朋友处境的充分理解和安慰。 第二部分进入正题,分析朋友与外国同学发生摩擦的原因。可以从不同的文化差异导致的沟通不利来分析,也可以从语言障碍导致的理解偏差着手。提出建议的部分可以与原因分析放在一起来阐述,即分析一个原因提出一个建议,也可以将建议与原因分析分开表述,即分析原因后给出解决问题的所有建议。

最后可以表达对朋友的美好祝福,祝愿其尽快调整自己的状态,融入到新的生活和集体中去。

●初稿:

Dear Mark,

I heard of that you quarreled with your roommate John last Friday night. He played rock music very loudly, so you couldn’t sleep well. As you had an exam the next morning, you needed to sleep well. I know that you need sleep before your exams. I also know that many British students love rock music, because they think it can help them to relax. I think you should talk to him directly and ask him to turn down his music or advise him to wear headphones. If he does it again, you can ask the supervisor for help. Maybe he will let you change a dorm.

Good luck with your study!

Yours sincerely,

Anne

●教师点评:

初稿是一篇通俗易懂的书信。从三个方面构建文章框架,符合建议型书信的写作要求,大体涵盖了所有的要点,基本上完成了写作任务。但是在文章的整体构思、语言组织与表达方面还是存在较大的缺陷。

首先,文章内容的构思存在一些问题。在首段介绍冲突时,语言过于啰嗦;而且分析原因时,只罗列表面问题,而没有真正点明内在的原因,即与文化差异的关系。

其次,文章用了太多的简单句,语言过于口语化,使文章结构略显松散。比如I know ..., I also know ...略显口语化。所以,要注意语言的精练与严谨,建议适当使用复合句、连词等来丰富文章的句式,使句子结构更加紧凑。

●成稿:

Dear Mark,

I’m sorry to hear that you had an argument with your roommate. You know life is never easy especially when you suddenly move to a new place. Conflict and culture shock are common for people living aboard.

I think the main cause of your conflict is culture shock. Since you live in a different country with a different culture, it is natural that your lifestyles are different. A famous saying goes as "When in Rome, do as Romans do", so I advise you to learn about British culture and mix together with your new friends. Things will be better as long as you communicate with your roommate. You will find that your teens are all very friendly!

Good luck with your studies!

Yours sincerely,

Anne

●教师点评:

相对于初稿来说,成稿语言更加规范,用词更加准确,句式更加丰富,文章结构更加紧凑,涵盖了所有的写作要点,很好地完成了写作任务。此外,在文章写作过程中,强调了问题产生是文化上的差异造成的,并在此基础上给出了很好的建议。是一篇合乎要求的好文章。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. It’s a good idea to ...

2. Different countries have different cultures and lifestyles.

3. Turn down ... It’s too late. Otherwise, you will disturb ...

4. If you can not solve this problem by yourself, you can go to ... for help.

●巩固练习:

你的朋友Sarah写信向你倾诉她的烦恼,诉说她与父母在兴趣与学业的选择上产生的分歧。请你给她回一封信,分析她与父母产生矛盾的原因并提出好的建议,帮助她解决烦恼。 写作要求:1. 思路清晰,分析具体,语言精练;2. 词数:120左右。

本期参考范文

Dear Sarah,

As your friend, I can understand how you feel; however, your parents’worry is necessary since study is a very important task for you right now. I think you and your parents are thinking the same thing from different points of view. I believe that your parents hope you can achieve something, but they may not know what you really want. Therefore, you should tell your parents your dream and show your talent for dancing. Also, I advise you make a timetable for your dancing course, and arrange your dancing course and studies properly.

I hope you have a good day!

Yours sincerely,

Anne

23. Customs

写作任务:

假如你是李明,你的美国朋友Bob来信表示对中国文化特别感兴趣,尤其想知道中国人是如何欢度春节的。请你给他写一封回信介绍有关情况。(词数:不少于120)

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是一篇书信体裁的作文。它要求学生能够将所学的知识充分运用到实际生活中去,能够清晰准确地用英语传达信息。

2. 本封信的内容是向你的一个外国朋友介绍我国过春节的情况。通篇文章应使用第一人称,时态主要使用一般现在时。

3. 展开书信写作时,首先要问候对方;其次介绍我国人是如何过春节的,如:On the New Year’s Day ...,也可以写写自己过春节的感受;最后邀请他有机会到中国来过春节。

初稿:

Dear Bob,

I’m glad to hear from you. You said that you are very interested in Chinese customs, especially the Spring Festival. Several days before it, people are busy shopping and cleaning. On the New Year’s Eve, the whole family usually get together to have dumplings, set off fireworks, and watch TV programs. On the New Year’s Day, people always get up early and put on new clothes. Everyone looks happy and says "Happy New Year" to each other. Children can also get lucky money from their parents and other adults. When you take a walk in the streets, you will be struck by the sight of beautiful decorations. Some doors are decorated with red lanterns. This is something about our Spring Festival. And welcome to our country some day.

Best wishes.

Yours,

Li Ming

教师点评:

本文覆盖了写作任务中规定的所有内容,所使用的词汇和语法结构基本准确,语言连贯,结构完整,基本达到写作目的。但是仍有个别地方有所欠缺,有待修改和完善。

1. 文章没有段落,显得有些缭乱且思路不清。

2. 本文大多是单纯的叙述和介绍,缺少作者本人的情感和一些带有人情味的语句,读起来给人感觉颇为生硬。

成稿:

Dear Bob,

I’ve received your letter, and I’m glad to hear that you are very interested in our traditions, such as the Spring Festival.

The Spring Festival is one of the most important traditional festivals in China. Both adults and children look forward to this great day, just like Christmas Day in the West. Several days before it, people are busy shopping and cleaning. The night before, the whole family usually gets together to have dumplings, set off fire-works, and watch TV. On New Year’s Day, people always get up early and put on new clothes. Everyone looks happy and says "Happy new year" to each other. I like the Spring Festival because I can get lucky money from my elders. Walking down the street, you will see many beautiful decorations. Many homes are decorated with red lanterns and other things.

Isn’t the Spring Festival interesting? I’m sure that you will love it. I hope you can join us

during a Spring Festival.

Best wishes.

Yours,

Li Ming

教师点评:

本文简要介绍了我国春节以及人们过节时欢天喜地的情形。文笔流畅,层次清楚,遣词造句恰到好处。许多短语运用恰当,如look forward to / be decorated with等。尤其难能可贵的是,本文的情境描写栩栩如生,给人一种身临其境之感,如:Walking down the street, you will see many beautiful decorations. Many homes are decorated with red lanterns and other things. 不失为一篇佳作。

Powerful Sentences:

1. It is a time for rest and relaxation. Children spend their time playing and having fun.

2. It is a delightful time for everyone, especially for those who have been working very hard for the whole year.

3. Public places are filled with people of all ages. Many people go traveling during the holiday.

4. In the daytime, there are many kinds of activities, such as visiting friends and relatives, and going to parks and temples.

巩固练习:

李明在给美国朋友Bob回信介绍了中国的春节后,又想了解西方除了圣诞节还有什么节日备受欢迎,于是向Bob询问他最喜欢什么节日。假如你是Bob,请你给李明写一封120词左右的回信,向他介绍西方的万圣节(Halloween)。回信要包括以下要点:

1. 万圣节的时间(10月31日);

2. 在南瓜上挖出脸形,里面放蜡烛,做成南瓜灯;穿戴稀奇古怪的面具和衣服;准备一个袋子。挑灯拿袋,挨家挨户讨要小奖赏,不然就会搞恶作剧。

参考词汇:

pumpkin n.南瓜;

mask n.面具

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Li Ming,

My favorite festival is Halloween. Besides Christmas Day, Halloween is one of the most interesting and popular festivals. It is mainly considered to be a day for children. On October 31, children cut faces into pumpkins and put burning candles inside. They put on strange or frightening masks and clothes. After all these preparations, they carry boxes or bags from house to house and shout, "Trick or treat". The adults must put some candies into their bags, or the naughty children may play tricks on the adults or play some other practical jokes on them. I like Halloween not only because it is a crazy day, but also because it brings me the satisfaction of being young.

24. Disaster

写作任务:

据报道,近年来太湖遭到工业垃圾的严重污染,水质不断恶化。加之今年4月以来,太湖流域高温少雨,被污染的湖水和这种气候条件极其适宜蓝藻的生长,以致6月蓝藻在太湖大规

模生长。蓝藻腐烂后,湖水散发出刺鼻的臭味,无锡市太湖饮用水水源地也受到了严重影响。请根据这篇报道写一篇120词左右的英语短文,投给某英文杂志社,题目是"Algae Outbreak in Lake Tai and Environ-mental Protection"。

参考词汇:

algae n.蓝藻

ecological adj.生态的

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是由典型事例引出议论的夹叙夹议的文体,正确审题是写作难点。根据题目要求,文章的重心在叙述"Algae Outbreak in Lake Tai"和对"Environmental Protection"发表自己的看法两个方面,不要写成一篇纯粹的关于生态灾难的新闻报道。本文的第一段写太湖蓝藻污染事件,写作时,应提炼写作要点,合理安排顺序,不要逐字翻译。第二段写措施或看法,并号召保护环境。

2. 本文是夹叙夹议文体,因此时态运用视情况而定。

3. 本文与环境污染和环境保护有关,写作时可以运用以下句型:

With the development of economy and growth of the population, ...

send waste water directly into the lake

be seriously polluted by ...

do great harm to

be in danger

use environmentally friendly materials

初稿:

Algae Outbreak in Lake Tai and Environmental Protection

Terrible algae broke out in June in Lake Tai. It is famous for its beautiful scenery and clear water. The water was smelly after the algae died, which had a bad effect on the drinking water supply for millions of people in Wuxi City. Why did algae grow so much? There are two main reasons for the disaster of algae. One is that factories sent waste water directly into the lake, so the lake water was seriously polluted. The weather is the other reason. Since April of this year, it has been hot and seldom rains. It is suitable for algae to grow a lot in the hot weather and polluted water.

Our living surroundings have been badly damaged. It is high time that we took some measures to protect our environment.

教师点评:

1. 本文清楚地描述了太湖蓝藻事件,并运用了一些适当的语法结构。比如:It is high time that ...等等。

2. 但是作者审题有误,把讲述太湖蓝藻事件确定为写作重心,而强调环境保护时却一笔带过。显然,不符合写作目的。

3. 语言运用能力有所欠缺,表达不精炼。

成稿:

Algae Outbreak in Lake Tai and Environmental Protection

A terrible case of algae broke out in Lake Tai in June, an attraction ever famous for its beautiful scenery and clear water. Smelly algae has seriously polluted the lake and threatened the drinking water supply for the millions of people living in Wuxi City. There are two main reasons for this disaster. The first is that some factories in the area have been pouring a lot of waste directly into the lake. The other reason is that the local weather has been hot with little rain since

April. In this case, it is very good for algae to grow.

This natural disaster shows how the ecological balance in this area has been badly damaged. It is high time that we took some measures to protect our environment. For example, there should be laws introduced to stop factories from pouring their waste into the lake. Also we should make use of environmentally friendly materials in our daily lives. Most importantly, the public should be taught the importance of environmental protection.

教师点评:

1. 本文审题正确,结构安排合理。第一段叙述太湖蓝藻事件,第二段发表评论,符合题目要求。

2. 在叙述蓝藻事件时,作者没有逐字翻译,而是根据提供的材料概述了事件的前因后果。

3. 短文运用了一些恰当的语言表达方式。如:

Smelly algae has seriously polluted the lake and threatened the drinking water supply for the millions of people living in Wuxi City.

Powerful Expressions:

(表达环境破坏)

1. With the development of economy, factories are producing more and more waste.

2. Factories often pour waste directly into rivers and lakes.

3. The rivers and lakes have been seriously polluted.

4. The pollution is so terrible that it has done great harm to both human and the environment.

5. Much pollution has caused many serious problems such as global warming.

6. Many trees were cut down.

7. More and more good farmland has turned into desert.

8. Human beings, animals and plants are all in danger.

巩固练习:

假如你校正在开展"秋季防火"安全教育活动。请根据下面的提示,为你校校报英文专栏写一篇题为"A Forest Fire"的报道,并发表个人看法。(词数:120左右)

1. 时间:昨日深夜

2. 地点:大山林场(Dashan Timber Land)

3. 起因:一个过路人乱丢烟头(cigarette end)

4. 经过:消防队员立即赶到现场,经过5小时的奋战,终于控制住了火势

5. 后果:1/3的森林被烧毁,一人死亡,两名消防队员受伤

本期写作指导参考范文

A Forest Fire

A terrible fire broke out in Dashan Timber Land at midnight yesterday. On hearing the news, the firefighters hurried there at once. Although the fire was very big and the smoke was heavy, they bravely fought against it. The fire lasted for five hours before the firefighters were able to bring it under control. To everyone’s sorrow, almost one third of the forest was destroyed in the fire. Worse still, one person was killed and two firefighters were badly injured. According to research, the fire was started by a live cigarette end thrown carelessly by a passer-by. The accident has taught us a lesson that measures should be taken to prevent forest fires. For example, notice boards should be made to warn passers-by of the dangers of throwing out cigarette ends. All in all, the public should be taught the importance of preventing fire.

25. Dreams

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你是李华,你曾想将来成为一名作家,可是这个寒假后,你的理想改变了,因为你在农村外婆家度假时结识了一个小女孩,由于那里师资匮乏,她所在的学校的学生只能隔一天上一次课。你听到后很震惊。请你写一篇120词左右的短文来描述这件事情,并谈谈自己的感想。 写作分析:

注意人称和时态:因为要谈自己所经历的事,所以人称宜用第一人称,此外由于所记叙的事情已经发生,所以用过去时态,当然,在直接引语中仍然要用一般现在时。

初稿:

When I was young, I felt so happy all day and I thought that everyone was just as happy as me. At that time, I dreamed to be a writer. However, in the winter vacation I meet a girl and she changes my mind. I met this girl in my grandma’s village and soon we become good friends. She told me that she can’t go to school every day as her school had not enough teachers and classrooms. She wants to go to school and meets her classmates every day very much. I am shocked when I heard that.

Since then, my dream has changed. I have got a new dream now. My dream is that one day all children can go to school. My dream is that all people will live a happy life. I have a dream ... 教师点评:

本文概括了题目中所有的要点,情节基本完整,语言表述基本清楚,尤其是结尾的排比句用得很好,但要注意以下两点:

1. 文章的基本时态应为一般过去时。本文中的时态有些混乱。

2. 结尾泛泛而谈,没能具体地表述出自己的理想是什么。

成稿:

Before this winter vacation, I thought that everyone was just as happy as me. I once dreamed of being a writer. However, after the vacation I changed my dream.

I met a girl in a small village where my grandma lives. Soon we became good friends, and she told me about her life. Because of a lack of teachers and classrooms, the students there had to go to school every other day. She wanted to go to school and meet her classmates every day. I was shocked when I heard that.

Now my dream has changed. My new dream is to be a teacher and go to the poor villages to teach kids there. I believe that my new dream can help many children and can hopefully change their lives.

教师点评:

本文语言平实、流畅,写得生动感人,真实地反映出了作者的心理感受。作者幼小的心灵被现实生活中一件事情所震撼,由此改变了自己原来当作家的梦想,转而要当一名乡村教师来改变更多人的命运。习作中长短句结合,读起来有很强的节奏感。句型用得驾轻就熟,突出了文章主题,为一篇不可多得的中学生习作。

Powerful Sentences:

1. I had a dream that I could ... Then I would ...

2. I have had many dreams from my child-hood until now, and they continue to change as I grow older.

3. Where there is a will, there is a way.

4. Through hard work, I believe that my dream will come true in the near future.5. My dream is to become a ... I want to make good use of my knowledge to make our country even better.

巩固练习:

假如你是王英,一天在某英文网站上你看到下面这位名叫Mary的女孩的苦恼,请你给她回一个帖子给她提些建议。(词数:120左右)

My name is Mary. My dream is to be-come a dress designer, but I am afraid that it is a dream that will never come true. The truth is I failed the last math exam. I think that the teacher doesn’t pay much attention to me. My parents even told me that I should give up my dream, and it seems so far away now. I really don’t know what to do. I feel lost.

本期参考范文

Dear Mary,

I think I can understand how you feel, since I once had the same problem. Let me tell you what I think. To make your dream come true, you need do a few important things. First, you need to study harder, so that you can pass your exams. The teacher cares about all of the students, but he probably won’t help you unless you ask him for help. He’s just waiting for you to ask for help because he wants to see that you want to learn and that you want to improve. Don’t feel sad. Change your own situation. Second, you should have more confidence. Remember the saying, "Failure is the mother of success." You could also say, "Confidence is the son of success. "Face your dream bravely. For you, it is not only a dream, but also a bright future. Finally, I hope that your big dream will come true in future. I’ll be waiting to hear the good news. Best wishes.

26. Education

写作任务:

假设你校上周在学生中就家庭作业的必要性开展了一次讨论,请你以"The Advantages of Homework"为题写一篇120词左右的短文,简述你和同学们的讨论结果并发表自己的看法。写作要点如下:

1. 家庭作业为学生制定了学习计划,帮助其温故而知新。

2. 家庭作业能够帮助学生克服惰性,培养学生的自学能力。

3. 家庭作业能够向老师反馈学生对知识的掌握情况。

4. 适当的家庭作业能够对学生的学习起到促进作用。

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务属于观点态度型议论文,它与学生的生活密切相关。应该根据提示阐明自己的观点,抓住要点,做到论述层次分明、有理有据。写作时应使用第一人称,时态以一般现在时为主。2. 写作思路如下:(1) 开头部分:提出话题,阐明论点和学生讨论得出的不同观点。(2) 中间部分:阐明自己的观点,并且分层叙述,要包含所有的写作要点。(3) 结尾部分:总结上文,结合自己的实际,重申自己对论点的态度。

初稿:

The Advantages of Homework

Homework is a part of our life. Some of us think homework is necessary for it helps our study. The other students think it is unnecessary for it robs our freedom.

In my opinion, homework has advantages for students. First, homework helps us to set a studying plan. By doing homework, we can go over the old knowledge and gain the new knowledge.

Secondly, homework helps us to get over your laziness. We are often lazy and unwilling to

do homework. Homework helps us cultivate our ability to teach ourselves.

Thirdly, homework tells teachers whether we have understood what we have learnt. If we do a bad job in homework, teachers will know that we don’t understand.

In a word, I think proper homework can have a positive effect on our study.

教师点评:

初稿的优点是层次清楚,表明了作者的主要观点,完整地涵盖了写作要点。不足之处主要是出现了许多语法错误,并且用词和句式较为单调。

1. 代词的前后不一致。Some of us 和The other students不一致,应改为The others;helps us to get over your laziness中的your应为our。

2. 句式单一,缺少必要的关联词语。如在第一段中可以插入while表对比。

3. 表示顺序时,前面用了First,后面最好用Second ...;或者前面用Firstly,后面用Secondly ... 以保持前后统一。

成稿:

The Advantages of Homework

Recently there has been a heated discussion on homework. Some students say homework is necessary since practice makes perfect, while others say it robs them of their freedom.

In my opinion, homework is necessary. Firstly, homework helps us work out a study plan. By doing homework, we can review old knowledge and gain new knowledge.

Secondly, homework helps us to get over our laziness. As young people, we are often too lazy to study, so homework can help us develop a habit of self-study.

Thirdly, homework allows the teachers to find out whether we understand the subject or not. If we do a poor job, our teachers will know that we do not understand what we’ve learnt, and so they will take further measures to help us.

In the end, I think proper amount of homework in proper forms can help us do a good job in our study.

教师点评:

本文比初稿词汇丰富,关联词语的使用使句式更加多样化,更加灵活生动,流畅自然。

开头"Recently there has been a heat-ed discussion on homework."一句起到了统领全文的作用。改掉了初稿中语言表达不妥之处。在结尾处用"proper amount of homework in proper forms"表达了作者的期望和观点,使文章更加丰满。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Recently, we have discussed ...

2. People’s views on ... vary from person to person.

3. There are different opinions among us as to the necessity of ...

4. Some people hold that ... However, others believe that ...

5. Therefore, we’ve come to the conclusion that ...

6. All in all, some measures should be taken in time to ...

巩固练习:

假设某英文报纸正在开展假期征文活动,请你以"My Opinion on the Winter Vacation Homework"为题写一篇120词左右的短文,阐述你的观点和态度。

本期写作指导参考范文

I think the winter vacation homework is necessary and has a good effect.

Firstly, doing winter vacation homework is a must in order to review all the knowledge we have learned in the last term. It prevents us from forgetting what we have learned as well as allows

us to develop our understanding.

Secondly, as a guide to study, the winter vacation homework creates a timetable for us to follow, which tells us what we should do every day instead of killing time.

Thirdly, since we are at home alone, it is very helpful in helping us to think independently.

Finally, I think the winter vacation homework should consist of more interesting activities. Also every one of us should make efforts to do it carefully. After all, the vacation should not just be a time to relax.

27. English Learning

写作任务:

下周有一节英语写作课,老师要求每位学生提前准备一篇演讲稿,介绍一下自己在英语写作中的心得体会,和同学们在课堂上交流,题目自拟。(词数:120左右)

写作分析:

1. 这篇习作是典型的开放式作文,要求学生将自己在英语写作中的心得体会用英语写出来,不限要点。

2. 文章的题材为演讲稿,结构宜用总——分——总的结构。第一部分重点在引出话题,第二部分细述写作中的心得体会,第三部分对整篇文章进行总结概括,最好能够做到首尾呼应。

3. 文章宜用第一人称,时态的使用则比较灵活,过去时,一般现在时或现在完成时均可适时使用。

初稿:

How to Write a Good Composition

I think writing is not very difficult as long as you do it step by step.

Firstly, when I begin to write a composition, I make a writing plan to decide what I will write in each paragraph. Secondly, I will collect some information ac-cording to the task. Thirdly, when I begin to write, I choose different sentence structures to express myself, especially complex sentences. Fourthly, I always pay much attention to the relationship between sentences, and use some words to connect them. Finally, after writing, I never forget to check out the passage to see whether there are some mistakes.

In a word, if we have confidence, and practise more, we can succeed in English writing. 教师点评:

本篇习作结构完整,层次清晰,语法使用基本正确,可以看出作者有一定的英文功底。但也存在一些不足之处。

重点不够突出,文章只是将写一篇作文的基本步骤叙述出来,没有侧重点。也没有写出自己对英文写作的独到见解。作为介绍写作经验的演讲稿,缺少对听众足够的吸引力。另外作为演讲稿开头缺少呼语,结尾缺少结束语。

成稿:

How to Improve English Writing Ability

Hello, everyone! I’m glad to share with you my thought about English. I once thought it was rather difficult to write an English composition, but now I am confident that I can do a good job. Let me share my experience with you.

I have a notebook where I collect all of the good sentences I read in the books. I divide the notebook into several parts, such as Travel, Sports, Technology, and School Life and so on. Then I

write good sentences in each part. Most importantly, I read them every now and then so that I can remember more and more good sentences. As a result, when I begin to write a composition, these sentences naturally flow out.

I hope that my experience can help you. I also hope that I can learn more from everybody here. Thank you all.

教师点评:

文章首尾呼应,用词生动,内容重点突出,听后会给人留下深刻的印象。

难能可贵的是,可以看出这篇习作确实是作者的经验之谈,而且这些经验亦有可鉴之处。 Powerful Sentences:

1. Usually, a good learner gets twice the result with half the effort.

2. One should have a good study plan and be good at thinking.

3. You can solve many problems with the help of books, such as dictionaries and reference books.

4. In order to write well, you must read a lot.

5. If you want to improve your writing, you can study phrases and sentence structures, and try to make sentences with them.

巩固练习:

假如你是李明,是高一的学生,即将面临期末考试。除了英语作文,你对英语的其他题目都很有信心。因此请你给以前的外教Nancy 发一封电子邮件,向她请教如何提高英语写作技能。(词数:120左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Nancy,

I’m in senior middle school now, and I’m preparing for the final exam. I’m sure I can do a good job on all of the questions in the English exam except for the writing composition question. I have been putting my heart into English writing, but I still cannot write a good composition. Every time I begin to write a composition, it seems like all of the words run out of my mind, and I always make many mistakes when I write. What should I do? I know that English writing is very im-portant, so I’m getting more and more worried about the coming exam. I’d be grateful if you could give me some advice on how to improve my English writing. I’m looking forward to hearing from you soon. Thanks a lot.

Best wishes!

Yours truly,

Li Ming

28. Environment

写作任务:

假设联合国正在组织"爱水日"活动,请你以"保护水资源"为题写一篇小短文,呼吁大家一起来保护珍贵的水资源。(词数:120左右)

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是根据提示写一篇阐述自己观点的文章,属于开放型的议论文。文章要注意层次分明、有理有据。

2. 写作时可以先阐述目前缺水和水污染的现状,如有些地区人们缺少饮用水,是什么造成了水体污染,以及水污染所引发的一些社会问题,如导致河道里的鱼无法生存,人类因喝了受污

染的水而引发各种疾病。接着给出几点防止水污染的建议。最后呼吁大家从我做起都来保护水资源和我们的生存环境。

初稿:

Save Water Resources

Water is important in our life. In some parts of the world, such as Africa, people even have not enough water to drink. They are living a hard life because of lack of water; at the same time, water is being polluted by waste poured by factories. It is very important to protect water. Waste water should be cleaned before being poured into rivers and lakes. Laws should be made to prevent factories from polluting water. So we should protect water and our earth.

教师点评:

初稿的优点是基本能够把作者的观点阐述清楚,并有一些典型的词句,如:lack of ... / It is very important to ...等,但仍然存在一些不足:1. 文章缺少了因为水污染导致了怎样的后果的论述,显得论证不足,说服力不够。2. 文章的开头和结尾太过平淡,很难引起读者的兴趣。 成稿:

Save Water Resources

As we all know, there is not enough water on the earth now. In some parts of the world, such as Africa, people do not have enough water to drink. They live a very hard life because of the lack of water. At the same time, the little water that we have is being polluted by factories that create lots of waste. Fish in the polluted waters are not safe to eat any longer, and some people have even died from diseases caused by the polluted water.

It is very important to protect our water. Waste water should be cleaned before it is poured into rivers and lakes. Laws should be made to prevent factories from pouring waste into or near rivers and lakes without cleaning it first.

We hope that everyone can protect our water and keep it clean because we only have one earth and we must all share the same water.

教师点评:

本文紧扣题目要求,先写水资源的短缺,再写有些水资源被污染以及所导致的后果,层次分明,循序渐进。文章语言流畅自然,结构合理。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Our living conditions are getting worse and worse because the environment is being destroyed.

2. Laws should be passed to protect the environment.

3. Measures should be taken to reduce pollution.

4. The recycling of paper, steel, and plastic helps us protect the environment.

5. We should stop factories from pouring waste into rivers and polluting the air.

6. More environmentally friendly materials are expected to become part of our daily lives.

7. We need to create public awareness about environmental issues.

巩固练习:

假如你是光华学校高一年级的一名学生,几个月前学校附近新建了一个小型造纸厂,每天浓重的气味裹着黑烟从工厂烟囱里飘出来,严重影响了全校师生的健康。请你以"My School Is Polluted"为题写一篇文章,呼吁社会及有关部门重视并解决这个问题。(词数:120左右)(参考范文见下期)上期写作指导参考范文

本期写作指导参考范文

My School Is Polluted

Near my school a new small paper factory was set up several months ago. Since then, we have had a bad neighbor —a tall chimney. Every day the chimney lets out deep black and smelly smoke. We are always unhappy when the east wind blows because much of the smoke goes to our school. We all feel uneasy and uncomfortable. Fortunately, there are some trees on our campus. They have been protecting us a little, but they can’t protect us completely. We hope that those who care will read this and help us. The factory needs to take some measures to clean the smoke before it comes out of the chimney. We hope we can work and study in a clean environment.

29. Environmental Protection

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你是红星中学高一年级的赵琳,请你根据以下学生会的倡议书给某英文报社写一封信,叙述这次活动的内容并发表自己的看法。

倡议书

为了增强同学们节约能源、保护环境的意识,我们倡议同学们利用家中的废弃纸杯、塑料袋和易拉罐等生活废弃物手工制作生活日用品,请同学们踊跃参加。

活动意义:保护环境、激发学生的创造力和动手能力

时间:4月10日下午3点

地点:校操场东北角校学生会4月2日

写作要求:

1. 可根据内容要点适当发挥,但不要逐条翻译;

2. 信的开头已给出,不计入总词数;

3. 词数:120左右。

Dear editor,

My name is Zhao Lin. I am a student of Senior Two in Hong Xing Middle School.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________________________

Yours,

Zhao Lin

●写作分析:

本次写作任务要求写信描述倡议书中的活动内容并发表自己的看法,以记叙为主,同时也带有议论文写作的性质。这种类型的写作重点在于对事件本身的描述,并在此基础上发表自己的观点。这种转述活动的记叙文与描述人物或事件类的记叙文不同,不会涉及太多的描写性的语言,而重在将事件本身交代清楚,包括活动的目的、组织者、具体活动项目和自己对此的看法和评价。另外,要注意文章虽然是对倡议书的转述及看法,但不能逐字逐句地翻译,否则就变成了英文通知,因此可以通过个人对活动的点评将它和通知区别开来。

就本写作任务而言,我们可以将文章分为三个部分:

第一部分,可以简单介绍一下自己所在的学校以及所倡议的环保活动本身,引出文章写作的话题。

第二部分,进入正题,具体介绍环保活动。根据倡议书,我们可以从以下几个方面入手,比如活动内容、活动意义、活动地点和时间。这一部分只要将倡议书内容客观描述出来即可。

第三部分,要发表对环保活动的看法和观点。可以以自己为例来说明如何支持或参与这次环保活动,或者是对这次环保活动的评价及对其寄予的希望。

●初稿:

Dear editor,

My name is Zhao Lin. I am a student of Senior Two in Hong Xing Middle School. Next week our school will start up an environmental protection activity. The activity is organized by the Students’Union and the main content is making full use of our daily wastes, such as used paper cups, plastic bags, cans and other wastes. And the main aim is to raise students’awareness of environmental protection and improve their creativity and handmade ability. The activity will be held in the northeast part of our playground at 3 p.m. on April 10th.I think this activity is very good. My family has a lot of useless materials. Throwing them away will be a real waste and a serious pollution to our surroundings. So I hope the Students’Union can make this a good tradition and pass it down.

Yours,

Zhao Lin

●教师点评:

初稿基本涵盖了写作任务中所有写作要点,结构基本完整,逻辑关系表达比较清楚。首先,简单介绍了自己以及环保活动本身,引出主题。其次,具体介绍了环保活动。最后,表达了自己对于此次活动的看法。但是,在具体的写作过程中也存在不足之处:

首先,文章结构完整但安排不合理。比如第二部分,尽管对倡议书内容进行了全面的介绍,但感觉像是流水账,一一罗列活动的组织单位、内容、意义、地点和时间,而结构安排没有任何新意。因此建议在构思文章结构时,在保证结构完整的基础上注意内容的新意。

其次,句式简单且单一,而且句子之间缺少过渡。比如第二部分中的the main content is ..., the main aim is to ...和The activity will be held ... 等句子,表达相似,语言缺乏生动性。因此,建议适当使用复杂句或者连词,增强语言的丰富性以及文章的连贯性。

●成稿:

Dear editor,

I am a student of Senior Two in Hong Xing Middle School. In order to protect the environment and inspire students’creativity, the Students’Union will put forward an environmental protection program.

In the activity, students are encouraged to do the handmade work with used paper cups, plastic bags and waste cans so that these useless materials can be made full use of. The activity will be held in the northeastern part of our playground at 3 p.m. on April 10th.As for me, I support this activity because it is fun and meaningful. I hope the Students’Union can make this an annual tradition and pass it down. I hope our human garden will become more and more beautiful.

Yours,

Zhao Lin

●教师点评:

文章结构清晰,要点完整,叙述准确明了,紧扣题目要求。整篇文章注意了结构的安排。文章最后还表达了作者对于此次活动所寄予的希望:I hope the Students’Union can make this an annual tradition and pass it down..此外文章用了几个很好的短语,如make ... a tradition, pass ... down等,从而增强语言的丰富性以及文章的连贯性,使得行文流畅,结构紧凑。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. Though the environment doesn’t have a mouth to protest against what humans have done

to her, she protests through action.

2. Measures should be taken to protect the environment.

3. Corporations should pay special attention to the effect they have on the environment and work out solutions for the problems.

4. Governments should forbid the destruction of vegetation, rivers, lakes, oceans, and the atmosphere.

5. The public should be made totally aware of the importance of protecting the environment. ●巩固练习:

假如你是长安中学的高中生李明,你们学校的环保社团为了倡导同学们从点滴做起保护环境,向全校学生征求保护环境的新点子。现在请你写一封信给该社团,表达自己的想法。内容要点:

1. 出行尽量乘公交车,骑自行车或步行;

2. 尽量不用一次性物品;

3. 进行垃圾分类。

参考词汇:

one-off 一次性的

classify waste by category 垃圾分类

写作要求:1. 观点新颖,语言精炼; 2. 词数:120左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

Dear Sir,

I am a senior middle school student. I support your environmental protection activities. Here, I have some ideas about what we can do. First, we can use public transportation, bikes or walk instead of using cars, as cars produce waste gas and fill cities with noise. Secondly, we should stop using one-off supplies such as one-off chopsticks, lunch boxes and so on. They not only waste natural resources, but also pollute the environment. Last but not least, we should classify waste by category.

Environmental protection still has a very long way to go and everyone should pay more attention to it and make greater effort. Because only by saving the environment can we save ourselves!

Yours,

Li Ming

30. Experience

写作任务

假如你校的英文报正在以"A Meaningful Experience"为题进行征文活动,请你根据图片提供的信息以第三人称用英语写一篇征文。短文需包括所有图片内容,内容要连贯、完整。(词数:100左右)

写作分析

1. 本次写作任务是根据一组图片描述两名学生帮老人打扫卫生的过程,属于记叙文,侧重考查学生观察理解的能力及运用语言的能力。短文应包括事情发生的时间、地点、人物、过程和结尾。宜用过去时态。

2. 看图作文的难点在于不知从何下手。因此,首先根据图画内容整理出几个要点,再根据这些要点决定行文的整体脉络。

1)一个周末的上午,小芳和小明去王奶奶家打扫卫生。

2)他们擦窗户。

3)他们个子矮,够不着窗户的顶端。

4)小明找来一根棍子,把抹布绑在棍子上。

5)很快他们把窗户擦得干干净净。

6)打扫完,他们回家了。

3. 短文应以时间和事件发展为顺序,因此,需要使用适当的表示时间和顺序的名词、副词、介词短语、分词短语等。如:one Sunday morning, one day, at 9 o’clock, when, while, after that, then, and, having cleaned the window 等。

初稿:

A Meaningful Experience

Last Sunday, Xiao Fang and Xiao Ming went to Grandma Wang’s home to help her clean the windows. They took the cleaning tools, and cleaned the windows carefully. Some windows were so high that they couldn’t reach them. Then Xiao Ming thought up a good idea. They tied the cloth to a stick, and cleaned the windows which were beyond their hands. After all this was completed, they said goodbye to Grandma Wang, who saw them off at the door. She welcomed them to come to play at her house next time, and promised that she would prepare some delicious food for them. 教师点评:

短文覆盖了写作的主要内容,故事叙述基本完整。所使用的词汇和语法结构能满足写作需要,基本完成了写作任务。同时使用了一些句型和短语,如:so ... that ..., tie ... to ..., see off 等。并运用了and, after, then 等连接词。但仍存在一些不足:

1. 由于缺乏连接词和有些连接词使用不当,使文章逻辑不太连贯。

2. 可以看出作者在尝试使用一些复杂的语法结构和词汇,但运用不准确,表达有误。

3. 没有适当的发挥,造成文章内容不太充实。

成稿:

A Meaningful Experience

Last Sunday, Xiao Fang and Xiao Ming, who were students in a middle school, went to Grandma Wang’s house to help her clean the house. As soon as they arrived, they began to wipe the windows carefully with a cloth. After a while, however, they found that some windows were so high that they couldn’t reach them. Suddenly Xiao Ming had a good idea. They tied a piece of cloth to a stick and used it to clean the windows which were beyond their reach. After cleaning the windows, they cleaned every room carefully as well. A whole day passed before they knew it. They were very tired, but they were happy. Grandma Wang was deeply moved and she thanked them. In the late afternoon, they said goodbye to Grandma Wang and went back home. They had spent the day in a meaningful way!

教师点评:

1. 本文覆盖了图片包含的所有要点,结构完整,条理清晰。

2. 在讲述事情经过时,短文采用了富于变化的多种过渡语:As soon as ..., After a while ...,

A whole day passed ..., In the end .... 不仅如此,however和suddenly, 的运用,使得文章具有层次感。

3. 另外,文章还使用了较多的语法结构和句型。如:so ... that ..., help ... (to) do ..., tie ... to ..., say goodbye to ... 等。

4. 并且文中还有较为地道的表示法,如:... and used it to clean the windows which were beyond their reach.

Powerful Sentences

(花费时间)

They spent two hours cleaning the windows.

It took them two hours to clean the windows.

Two hours had passed before they finished cleaning the windows.

(想出办法)

Suddenly he had an idea.

Then he had a good idea.

He thought up an idea.

An idea struck him.

巩固练习

假设你叫李华,是北京某中学的学生,你写信给你的加拿大笔友Bob讲述你和同学们去北京郊县捡"白色垃圾",为"绿色奥运"尽自己的一份力量的经历,并邀请他20xx年到中国来。信件需包含下列内容:

1. 早上8:00乘车出发,9:00到达目的地。

2. 村子附近黄沙连天,只有零星的几棵树。

3. 捡"白色垃圾"的活动持续到傍晚。

4. 谈谈自己的感受。

注意:

1. 信件字数在120左右。

2. 注意文章的连贯性,可适当发挥。

3. 信的开头已写出,不计入总词数。

Dear Bob,

I’d like to tell you about an unforgettable thing we did for the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. "Green Olympics" is one of its three themes. For this reason our school organized an activity for 本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Bob,

I’d like to tell you about an unforgettable thing we did for the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. "Green Olympics" is one of its three themes. For this reason our school organized an activity for protecting the environment. Early in the morning, I got up and hurried to school. I got on the school bus with my classmates at the gate. All the way, we sang happily. One hour later we got to the destination. It was a small village. Seeing the endless desert near the village, we were shocked. We began to pick up plastic bags, plastic cups and other garbage from the roadside. Time passed quickly. Before we knew it, the sun was setting, so we started to go back. On the way home, we were thinking that as students in Beijing, we have to play an active role in realizing the goal of the Green Olympics. We welcome you to Beijing in 2008. Our capital will be more beautiful then.

Yours,

Li Hua

31. Famous People

写作任务:

英语课上,老师让大家用英语来说说自己最喜欢的作家,大家兴高采烈众说纷纭。有的说喜欢《简·爱》的作者夏洛蒂伯朗特,有的说喜欢《三重门》的作者韩寒。请以"My Favorite Writer"为题,用英语写一篇120词左右的文章,要点包括:

1. 你最喜欢的作家是……

2. 他(她)最著名的作品和他(她)的写作风格。

3. 你喜欢他(她)的原因。

写作分析:

1. 从写作任务中我们可以得知,此文为一篇写人的记叙文,应以第一人称来写,时态为一般现在时。

2. 本文可以分三部分来写。首先需要开门见山地告诉读者你最喜欢的作家是谁,并做简要介绍。其次介绍你喜欢他(她)的原因以及他(她)的作品给你带来了什么样的影响。最后可以写你从他(她)身上或从他(她)的作品中学到了什么。

3. 可以用一些句型或词组:be good at, get along well with, admire at

初稿:

My Favorite Writer—Guo Jingming

Guo Jingming is a famous writer in China. All the students may know him. And he is also my favorite writer. He was born in 1983. And he has published many books, such as Visionary and The Summer Still Doesn’t Come. These books are very touching. I can cry while I am reading his books. I thought he was a pessimistic person but now I think he is a sensational one. He doesn’t want to grow up. Although he is a writer, but he studies well. His words are plain, but they might make people feel quite close to him. I want to be a writer like him when I grow up. 教师点评:

本文选材比较新颖,选取了目前在青少年中有广泛影响力的年轻作家郭敬明为写作对象。文章语言连贯。但仍有个别不足之处:

1. 本文段落不清,思路稍显混乱,不能给人一目了然的感觉。

2. 情态动词使用不当,如I can cry while I am reading his books. / ... they might make people feel quite close to him.

3. 各别语法错误:although和but不能连用。

成稿:

My Favorite Writer—Guo Jingming

Guo Jingming is a famous young writer in China. Most of the students have heard of him or read his books. And he is also my favorite writer. Born in 1983, he has published many popular books till now, such as Visionary and The Summer Still Doesn’t Come. These books touch the readers’heart deeply. My tears often run down while I am reading his books. His words are plain, but they have a magic power to make people feel quite close to him.

Guo, like many youths, doesn’t want to grow up. In fact, I find many of his ideas are the same as mine. Maybe that is one of the main reasons I like him. Besides, I learn a lot from him. For example, he is a good student as well as a talented writer. I often tell myself if I want to be a writer like him when I grow up, I must study hard.

教师点评:

本文思路清晰,语言简洁流畅。My tears often run down while I am reading his books.这一句用具体的词句来描写郭敬明的书如何使我感动,而没有简单抽象地说使我感动,从而增强了文章的表达力度。Besides, I learn a lot from him.自然地把喜欢郭敬明的两个原因连接起来。

最后一句I often tell myself if I want to be a writer like him when I grow up, I must study hard. 反映出作者的真实感情。

Powerful Sentences:

(人物外貌描写)

1. She is a woman of forty and has a 9-year-old daughter.她今年四十,有一个九岁的女儿。

2. She is a lovely girl, with a round face, big eyes, white teeth and long wavy hair.她长得很可爱,圆圆的脸,大大的眼睛,洁白的牙齿,还有一头波浪似的卷发。

3. He is thin, tall and wearing a pair of thick glasses.他是瘦高个,带着一副深度近视眼镜。

4. He is a tall man, with blue eyes, brown hair, and a straight nose. 他高个,蓝眼睛,棕色头发,还有一个直挺的鼻子。

5. He is a short and funny-looking man, with a thick moustache.他身材矮小,看起来很滑稽,胡须浓密。

6. He is as tall as 176 centimeters.他身高一米七六。

7. He is really a tall man, about 1.98 meters in height.他个真高,大约一米九八。

巩固练习:

某英文网站正在开展"你最喜欢的明星"的征文活动。请以"My Favorite Pop Star"为题写一篇文章投稿。(词数:120左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

My Favorite Pop Star

My favorite pop star is Zhou Huajian. I like him not only because he is very friendly, but also because his songs are very beautiful. On October 18, 2006, he gave a performance in Tianjin. About 2,500 fans went to see him. Almost all of them were students. Some of them were even from Beijing, which is about 200 kilometers from Tianjin. I really wanted to watch his performance, but unfortunately, I didn’t get a ticket. So I had to enjoy his songs on TV. Zhou is one of the most popular stars in China. He is living in Hong Kong. He and his kind wife and their three lovely children are living a happy life. He used to play football as a university student. However, he has no time to play football now.

I hope Zhou is happy for the rest of his life, and presents more wonderful songs for us.

32. Fashion

写作任务:

假如你是某中学的学生,最近在你们班的英语班会上就"中学生是否可以穿时尚的服装?"的问题展开了讨论。请你根据下表的讨论结果,给你校校报"英文写作"栏目投稿,客观地介绍讨论的情况。(词数:不少于120)

意见

60%的同学认为不可以穿时髦的衣服

40%的同学认为应该穿时髦的衣服

原因

1. 价格昂贵,而学生没有经济收入;(1). 好看,时尚;(2). 追求时尚会牵扯精力,影响学习;

2. 作为当代的年轻人不应该太保守,应适应时代的发展;

3. 学生应该穿着朴素,时髦的服饰不符合中学生身份。

4. “爱美之心人皆有之”,追求美是中学生的权力。

写作分析:

1. 根据写作任务得知,本文要求大家写一篇论说文,介绍关于时尚服饰穿着的讨论结果。全篇文章应该以一般现在时为主,人称宜使用第一人称。

2. 可将文章分为三部分,第一部分介绍论题,第二部分介绍关于时尚服饰穿着的正反两方面意见,第三部分总结讨论结果。

3. 正反观点可以用以下短语:

on the one hand, on the other hand, on the contrary等等。表述每个观点的逻辑关系时,可运用以下连词。表并列关系:and, or, not only ...but also;表转折关系:but, yet; 表因果关系:because, as, since。

初稿:

One day we had a discussion about whether students should wear fashionable clothes. 60% of the students are against the idea. They said, "Fashionable clothes are too expensive and we haven’t made money yet. We teenagers should put our hearts into study. Going after the fashion will waste our time and it will have a bad effect on our study. We should be dressed in a simple way, and fashionable clothes don’t fit in with the environment at school."

40% of the students said, "We can wear fashionable clothes, because they are good-looking and popular. As a young student in China, one should follow the fashion of the modern life." They also think that they have right to enjoy their beauty.

教师点评:

本篇作文条理清晰,明确表达了两种观点及其原因。但也有不足之处:

1. 作者只是将写作任务中的表格提示做了字面上翻译,语言略显生硬。

2. 在文章结尾处没有写出全班一致的意见。

成稿:

One day we had a heated discussion about whether students should wear fashionable clothes. There were two viewpoints. 60% of the students, who are against wearing fashionable clothes, said, "These clothes are often expensive. We don’t make money, however. And surely it has a bad effect on our school life to always follow the latest fashions. We, as students, should put our hearts into study, not dressing fashionably. Moreover, we are expected to dress simply, and fashionable clothes do not fit in with school."

But the rest of the students said, "We should wear good-looking clothes, including fashionable clothes. We are part of modern society, in which everyone wants beauty, so why not make ourselves more beautiful?" And they believe they have the right to own beautiful things. In the end, we all agreed that we could wear what we liked as long as we didn’t break the rules of our school. 教师点评:

1. 作者将要点整合,准确地表达了复杂的逻辑关系,条理清晰,使文章浑然一体。2. 在文章中使用了一些恰到好处的复杂句式,句型富于变化,主动被动交替使用,例如:60% of the students, who are against wearing fashionable clothes, said ... / We are expected to dress simply ... 表现出作者很好的语言功底。

Powerful Sentences:

(关于议论文的句式和结构)

1. Nowadays, some may hold the opinion that ... But others have a different attitude. As far as I am concerned ... My arguments are as follows ...

2. Faced with this problem, quite a few people argue that ... but others think differently.

3. Now growing numbers of people are coming to realize that ...

巩固练习:

假设你校最近制定了一条新规定,不允许把MP3带入学校,就这项规定同学们展开了激烈的讨论,请你写一篇120词左右的短文,向校报"英文天地"专栏投稿,反映同学们的意见

本期写作指导参考范文

Recently, our school established a new rule, which doesn’t allow students to bring MP3 players to school. This rule at once led to arguments. Some students argued that the new policy was reasonable. First, although the MP3 player can bring beautiful music, students should pay more attention to study. Sometimes we can’t control ourselves and listen to it in class, so it affects our attention to the class. Second, the MP3 player is expensive, and puts unnecessary pressure on students from poor families. But other students thought the rule was unreasonable. First, it’s normal for students to follow the fashion. Second, the MP3 player can be a study tool, especially for learning English. So they believe the MP3 player can raise their interest in learning. Finally, we all found that we had one point of agreement: Any tool should be used in a proper way.

33. Festivals

写作指导

■写作任务:

你校"英语沙龙"为了开拓学生视野,增进多元文化的交流将于近期举办一场西方文化展览,你作为会员要向同学们介绍一个你所了解的节日。当你在某杂志上看到了一篇介绍巧克力节的报道后,打算把它推荐给你的同学。请你阅读如下信息,写一篇英语短文介绍巧克力节。 内容要点:

1. 介绍巧克力节概况;

2.巧克力节活动的具体内容;

3.你对巧克力节的评价。

写作要求:

1. 词数:120左右;

2. 语言通顺,行文流畅,衔接自然。

参考词汇:手工艺品handicraft 盛宴feast

最甜蜜的节日

每年的10月中下旬,意大利佩鲁贾(Perugia)都会举办"欧洲巧克力节",向世界展现深厚悠久的巧克力文化。主办方会根据不同主题而精心推出各项特色活动,以展现巧克力令人意想不到的一面,通常会展出新颖独特的巧克力手工艺品,如"巧克力房子"、"翻开的巧克力书"、"巧克力名车"、"巧克力时装"和"大型巧克力墙",这些都成为巧克力节上一道独特风景;主办方还会推出许多有趣的游戏,如参加烹饪课程,亲自动手,制作一件独一无二的个性巧克力,举办与巧克力有关的音乐晚会,美食学院举办专题讲座等。巧克力节并非只是吃巧克力那么单调浅薄,而是一顿集饮食、旅游、艺术于一体的"文化大餐",是一次体验意大利风情的极致盛宴!

■写作分析:

本次的写作任务是要求同学们写一篇介绍性的说明文。说明文的对象是学生不熟悉的节日,因此要首先建立读者对它的基本印象,即节日的举办时间、地点、主题及日庆祝的主要目的。文章的主干部分是对节日的具体介绍,这一部分可以根据作者对节日的了解介绍其起源、庆祝方式、活动内容,并引申至其文化内涵等方面。当然,如果作者信息资源有限,又受字数限制,

就节日的某个方面进行重点介绍也未尝不可。另外,由于是说明文,所以文章的结构要简洁明了,用词要准确、精炼。

就本次写作任务而言,同学们可以按照内容提示将文章分为三段来完成。第一段简单介绍巧克力节的举办时间、地点和节日的宗旨。第二段具体介绍节日活动。由于巧克力节日并非作者熟悉的内容,因此可以采用多面浅层的介绍方法。从材料给出的信息我们不难发现,巧克力节的展示和庆典分为三个板块,即①巧克力手工艺品、②巧克力游戏、③巧克力文化活动,文章主体可以从这三个方面展开。第三段,作者可以对巧克力节作一个简单的评价。

在语言方面,学生们应注意用词,以介绍性的语言为主,做到准确、平实、生动的描述,并且尽量采用短小精悍的句式,而不要过多使用复杂的句式。此外,本文要求有适当的描写,因此,可以选用形容词和副词来丰富语言,使之更加优美、生动活泼。

■初稿:

The European Chocolate Festival

Every October, the "European Chocolate Festival"is held in Perugia, Italy. The festival attracts thousands of visitors. It is a very good chance to show chocolate culture to the world.

In the exhibition, chocolate houses, opened chocolate books, chocolate cars, chocolate dresses, great chocolate walls and other wonderful products always give deep impressions to the visitors. There are some games that the visitors can join in, such as making special chocolate works by themselves. People can also attend parties and lectures on chocolate. The host of the festival wants to make it a great feast of food, tourism and art.

People who attend the festival can not only enjoy the sweet taste of chocolate, but also enjoy chocolate culture, too.

■教师点评:

文章结构完整,思路清晰,内容丰富。第一段介绍了巧克力节的举办时间、地点和举办的意义;第二段详细描写了巧克力节中的活动项目和内容;第三段总结巧克力节不仅能给人以味觉上的享受,而且也是一场领悟巧克力文化的盛宴!算得上是一篇优秀的习作。此外,语言简洁,符合说明文的语言规范。但是文章还是存在一些不足:1. 语言缺乏生动性,结构松散。在描写巧克力活动项目时,语言过于单一,仅仅是罗列各种活动项目的名称,而且语句之间较少使用连接词,使句子不能很好地衔接。修改时可以适当改变句型,使用合适的连词。2. 文章结尾虽然做出了对巧克力节的评价,但是并没有指出巧克力节所蕴含的真正内涵与意义。所以,建议重新组织结尾。3. 文章中还存在少量语法错误。比如短语make an impression on sb. 而不是to sb.

■成稿:

The European Chocolate Festival

Every October, the European Chocolate Festival is held in Perugia, Italy. It attracts thousands of visitors from both home and abroad. It is a good chance to communicate and pass on chocolate culture.

During the festival, many wonderful handicrafts are exhibited, such as high buildings, opened books, world-famous cars, fashionable dresses and great walls. These are all made of chocolate, which makes a deep impression on the visitors. What’s more, visitors can make their own special

chocolate handicrafts by themselves. People can attend parties and lectures on chocolate as well. In addition, they can not only taste the sweetness of chocolate, but also enjoy chocolate culture.

All in all, the European Chocolate Festival is definitely a great chocolate feast, combined with food, tourism and art! It is also a perfect chocolate feast of Italian culture!

■教师点评:

成稿相对于初稿来说,篇章结构更加合理,结构紧凑,行文更加流畅,条理清晰,语言更加生动,描写更为细致。成稿中结构完整,把介绍性的内容,全部放在第一段,给读者以整体感;第二段充分展现巧克力节的各种活动;最后一段对巧克力节做出总结性的评价。其中第二段介绍巧克力节的部分,采用了连词和非限定性定语从句,使文章的句型多样化,句式结构更加紧凑。此外,还用both home and abroad,What’s more,all in all 等短语,使语言更加生动,结构更加完整。 ■Powerful Sentences:

1. The festival attracts visitors from all around the world.

2. The festival presents us ... , which makes great impression on visitors.

3. This exhibition is a wonderful feast combined with ...

4. There are many stories about the origins of ...

■巩固练习:

奥运会的举办吸引了很多外国朋友的目光,同时也让他们对中国传统文化产生了浓厚的兴趣。你的一位外国朋友Peter对中国的端午节非常感兴趣,请你写一封信向他介绍这一节日。 词数:100左右。

信息提示:端午节是我国的传统节日,在每年的农历五月五日庆祝。有关端午节的起源传说颇多,但是普遍的说法是为了纪念诗人屈原。对于庆祝端午节,各地都有不同的风俗,人们吃粽子,赛龙舟。端午节当天人们还在门上插艾草,祈祷家人平安健康。

参考词汇:农历lunar calendar 龙舟dragon boat 艾草Ay Tsao

本期参考范文

Dear Peter,

Since you are very interested in our Chinese traditional Dragon Boat Festival, I would like to tell you about some of the customs and culture connected with it.

The Dragon Boat Festival is celebrated on the 5th of May in the Chinese lunar calendar. There are many stories about the origin of the festival, but the most popular one is to remember Qu Yuan, a loyal poet in ancient China. Different regions have different customs. During the festival, people eat Zong Zi and race dragon boats. Some people also hang a kind of plant, called Ay Tsao, on their door for protection. If you want to know more about the festival, please don’t hesitate to ask me!

Yours,

Anne

34. Festivals

写作指导

写作任务:

请你把下面这首小诗扩展成一篇短文。

How Lucky to Have Had So Good a Father

How lucky to have had so good a father! On us his warm sun long shone. We were, of his hardworking life, the center,

Loved for the pure joy of love alone.

Strange is the necessity of pleasure, Coming as they do within the will.

Knowing well where lay his greatest treasure, Years on years of love he labored still.

要求:

1. 不得照抄短诗原文;

2. 必须结合短诗的内容,发挥想象,适当展开;

3. 必须突出短诗的主题,结构完整,语意连贯;

4. 短文不能写成诗歌形式;

5. 词数120左右。

写作分析:

1. 首先要理解这首诗歌。诗歌的句式多采用了倒装和不规范的形式,因此加大了理解的难度。例如: On us his warm sun long shone. 我们转化为正常句式就是:His warm sun shone long on us. 而We were, of his hardworking life, the center则可调整为:We were the center of his hardworking life. 这样处理后,就容易理解了。

2. 将抽象的语言具体化。诗歌的语言是简单而抽象的,当我们展开时,就需要适当添加一些具体的内容使其浅显易懂。例如:Strange is the necessity of pleasure, e Coming as they do within the will.我们可以扩充为:It’s strange that our father should give his hand or bring us joy timely when we are in need of help or pleasure. 在整篇文章中,我们都可以借鉴这一方法。 初稿:

How lucky for us to have such a good father! In our mind, he is like the sun, providing us with warmth and energy all the time. We are the power for him to work hard, so that he gives us an enjoyable life. As a result, we are lead to a world of "joy". When we feel lonely, he comforts us immediately. With his help, we solve problems on time. In a word, he gives us not only assistance, but also pleasure of life. We are his greatest treasure, so he is willing to work day after day, never saying tired.

We are all proud of having such a good father. So we all like him more and more.

教师点评:

文章涵盖了要点内容,作者写作时也注意到了句式的变化,用到了被动语态we are lead (led) to a world of "joy"和并列结构... not only assistance, but also pleasure of life等。但有些连接词使用不是很恰当,在语法和词汇的搭配上还有些错误:

1. As a result在原文中显得多余,这里并没有前因后果的逻辑关系。紧接其后的in a word,在这里也并不是总结性的话,没有必要用in a word。注意:句子间和段落间不是一定要用连接词才能做到过渡自然,有时句子以及段落之间是靠逻辑关系衔接的。因此,要"有效地"运用句子之间和段落之间的连接词才能使文章行文流畅,逻辑紧凑。

2. 有些语言表达不够准确。"never saying tired"(不叫苦)英文中一般不这么用,应改成without any complaints。另外,we are lead to a world of "joy",是被动语态,所以应改成led to。 成稿:

This poem shows our appreciation for our father. It is our great fortune to have such a good father. Serving like the sun, he gives all his energy to protect us, and he does everything he can to make our future bright. Never afraid of hard work, he devotes himself to providing us with a better life. When we need help or pleasure, he gives us his hand or brings us joy, which makes me think about how magic his love is —silent and deep. Year after year, he shoulders the burden of hard work without any complaints. We are considered to be his priceless fortune.

In short, we are growing up happily and healthily thanks to our father’s love.

Powerful Sentences:

1. Our love of ... grows with every passing moment.

2. The festival was set up to show our deep appreciation for ...

3. The festival was set up to honor the historic time when ...

4. On this special day, children are allowed to ...

5. ... is the most interesting part of the festival.

巩固练习:

英语老师布置了作业请同学们想象一个新节日,并陈述其原因。假如你想设立一个"手机节",可参考如下提示。

要点:手机在当今社会的重要性;提醒人们辐射的危害;应做好手机电池回收工作。参考词汇:辐射radiation n.; 电池battery n.

本期写作指导参考范文

I want to start the Cellphone Festival because cellphones are a very important part of our lives now. With cellphones, people can communicate with each other no matter where they are. They also make doing business and keeping in touch with people more convenient. In a word, cellphones are really useful for many of us.

At the same time, the Cellphone Festival can remind people that using cellphones may be bad for our health. It may even cause cancer. According to some scientific reports, the batteries of cellphones are also very bad for the environment when they are thrown away. The festival will help people understand these problems better. In short, I think that this festival will be very meaningful.

35. Food and Health

写作任务:

随着社会的发展,人们生活水平的提高,大家对健康饮食越来越重视。假设班里要举行一场以Food and Health为主题的英语班会。请写一篇文章,谈谈你对饮食与健康的看法,诸如饮食习惯对健康的作用和影响,如何通过饮食促进健康等。(词数110左右)

写作分析:

1. 根据写作任务得知本文要求表达自己对饮食与健康的观点和看法。因此本文应采用第一人称来写作。

2.写作内容分为三个部分。第一部分先摆明自己的观点,可以用几句话来概括介绍健康饮食的重要性。第二部分具体阐述什么是健康的饮食或者如何吃得健康,可以用举例子的方法来阐述。另外还可以谈谈不健康的饮食会给身体带来什么不良的影响,如过多地摄入炸鸡腿,薯条,薯片等油炸食品或巧克力、冰淇淋等含糖量高的食品会导致肥胖等。最后一部分对全文作概括总结。

3.写此类谈原因、作用或者影响的文章时,可以参考以下表达方法:(表示原因或者影响)as a result, because, if ... then, lead to, therefore; (表示连接)First ... second ... third ..., above all, finally, last;(表示肯定程度)certainly, may, necessarily, perhaps, possibly, un-questionably …… 初稿:

Food and Health

Health is the most important part in our life. If someone is ill, he / she will be very uncomfortable. And it is not convenient to do something. So health is the first thing for us now.

But how to keep healthy? I think healthy food is good for our body. Everyday, we eat many kinds of food in order to keep our body in balance. We eat rice, vegetables, meat and other things. We get the nutrition from them. But sometimes, if we eat too much chocolate and ice-cream that are not good for our body, they can make us fat or get some diseases. So we must be careful about what we eat and how much we eat.

In a word, reasonable and balanced diets are the keys to staying healthy. And we should pay more attention to healthy food.

教师点评:

初稿的优点是基本能够将自己对饮食和健康的观点阐述出来,第二段谈如何保持健康时使用举例论述的方法比较有说服力,但是有些句子的组织不够简练,显得罗嗦,不利落,如We eat rice, vegetables, meat and other things. We get the nutrition from them。结尾In a word, reasonable and balanced diets are the keys to staying healthy.这句写得很好。可以看出作者语言功底不错,只是有些表达方法受中式思维的影响,略显生涩,不符合英文表达习惯,如第一段。另外,文章开头说健康对人很重要,然后举例说明健康的重要性,只谈了健康,而没有提到饮食与健康的关系。

成稿:

Food and Health

Nowadays, with the improvement of people’s living standards, health is a hot topic that many people are concerned about. But how to keep healthy? In my opinion, appropriate and healthy food is a key part in keeping healthy. Every day, we eat a variety of food in order to keep our body in balance. Our body needs various foods which offer different nutrients. But too much chocolate and ice-cream may get us fat or even sick. So we must be careful about what we eat and how much we eat. In a word, reasonable and balanced diets are the keys to staying healthy. So we should pay more attention to healthy food.

教师点评:

成稿覆盖了要求的所有要点,结构完整,层次清楚。文章语言流畅

PowerfulSentences:

1. Health is certainly more valuable than money because it is by health that money is procured (获得). —Samuel Johnson

2. Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.—Benjamin Franklin

3. Health is the thing that makes you feel that now is the best time of the year.—Franklin P. Adams

4. Doing exercise is another good way of keeping healthy. Exercise makes you healthier and helps you relax.

5. If you follow my suggestions, I’m sure you will be healthy.

巩固练习:

努力学习必须以好的身体做保证,如果只顾学习而不注意锻炼和休息,就不能全身心投入到学习中来。请以Work and Health为题,根据你自己的经历或者经验,写一篇短文,谈谈你的看法,投给学校英文校报。(词数110左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

Work and Health

Without good health, you cannot focus all your attention on your work. As a student, I used to work hard. I devoted all my time to my daily lessons and didn’t join in any outdoor activities. I ended up getting sick and had to stay in bed for two weeks. Because of my poor health, I fell behind in my studies!

From this experience, I have learned that good health is important to people who want to be a successful person. Now I spend fifteen minutes exercising early in the morning. I breathe fresh air and build up my body. I now know that of course we should work hard at our lessons, but we

should also pay attention to our health at the same time.

36. Friendship

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你是李华,在网上看到一个美国中学生Peter的征友帖子,请你给他写一封e-mail表达自己想成为他的笔友的愿望。信件的内容应包括以下几点:1. 你的基本信息:性别、年龄、年级等;2. 你的性格特点、个人爱好等;3. 表达出你想与对方成为笔友的诚意

要求:1. 词数:100左右;2. 可适当增加细节,以使行文连贯

分析:

1. 通常情况下,E-mail要遵循信件的格式,但由于它一般使用非正式的文体,因此正文(Body)前的称呼(Salutation)通常无需使用诸如"Dear Mr. John"之类的表达。在同辈的亲朋好友或同事间可以直呼其名,但对长辈或上级最好使用头衔加上姓。如:Tommy,或者Mr. Smith。信尾客套话(Complimentary close)通常也很简明。常常只需一个词,如:"Thanks", "Best", "Cheers"等即可,不需要用一般信函中的"Sincerely yours"或"Best regards"。

2. 写作任务中并未给出李华的详细资料,而是给出了一个内容提纲,即这封信应该包括的内容。我们在写作时应该注意包含提纲所涉及的所有内容,即个人基本情况介绍、性格特点、兴趣爱好和想成为对方的笔友的诚意。文章可以分为三部分:

第一部分,介绍你是如何得到对方的征友信息的,并简要表达一下自己想成为对方笔友的愿望;第二部分,介绍自己的个人信息,包括基本信息、性格特点、兴趣爱好等内容;第三部分,询问对方的兴趣爱好等,与对方产生互动。3. E-mail文体的另外一个特点是简单明了,便于阅读。E-mail的非正式的文体特点并不意味它的撰写可以马虎行事,特别是给长辈或上级写信,撰写业务信函更是如此。写完信后,一定要认真检查有无拼写、语法和标点符号等错误。 ●初稿:

Dear Peter,

I saw your information on the website and found that you wanted to make a Chinese friend. I am so glad because I am looking for a pen pal, too.

I am a teenager of your age. I am now in the first grade of high school. I am an outgoing boy. I love sports and music. I am on the school basketball team. I have won several prizes in singing contests in my school. I am the only child in my family and I love making friends.

Best wishes!

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

这篇初稿遵循了E-mail的写作格式,内容全面,包括了写作任务中给出的信息,语言也比较简练,总体来说是一篇合格的文章。但是还有一些可以改进的地方。首先,全文简单句过多,特别是在介绍自己相关信息的第二段,几乎整段都是简单句的堆砌。而实际上,这些简单句完全可以通过一定的连词和简洁、有力的从句表达出来。比如:"I am an outgoing boy. I love sports and music."就可以改成定语从句"I am an outgoing boy who loves sports and music."句子之间的连贯性不强,几乎都没有使用有效的连接词或者短语,导致全篇结构比较松散。最后,想与对方成为笔友的诚意还表达得不够明确,可以加上与对方的一些互动,例如:询问对方是不是也与自己有相同的兴趣爱好等,来增加与对方沟通的信息点。

●成稿:

Dear Peter,

I saw your information on the website and found that you wanted to make a Chinese friend. I am so glad because I am looking for a pen pal, too.

I am a teenager of your age and I am now in the first grade of high school. I am an outgoing boy who loves sports and music. I am on the school basketball team and I have won several prizes in singing contests in my school. I am the only child in my family and I love making friends.

What kinds of hobbies do you have? Tell me more about yourself.

I am looking forward to your reply.

Yours,

Li Hua

●Powerful sentences:

1. A friend in need is a friend indeed.

2. Friends are the relatives we choose by ourselves.

3. Friendship is a true treasure that is worth care and love.

●巩固练习:

假如你是李华,你的笔友Mary跟她的一个好朋友吵架了,不知道该怎么办,给你写了一封信,对你讲了这件事。请你给Mary写一封信安慰她,并给她提一些建议。词数110左右。

本期参考范文

Dear Mary,

I am sorry to hear that you had a fight with your best friend, but don’t worry too much about it. It is common among friends. I also had a fight with my best friend, but we cleared things up and we are still good friends.

I am happy that you trusted me and told me about your worries. To be honest, I don’t think your best friend will give up the friendship just because of one fight. Instead of avoiding her, you should talk to her and tell her what’s really on your mind. I believe that if you are honest and tell each other how you feel, everything will be fine.

It is never easy to make true friends, so protect them with all your heart.

Best wishes!

Yours,

Li Hua

37. Good Manners

写作指导

●写作任务:

假设你叫李华,今年暑假参加了一次中英学生夏令营活动。在这次活动中,你不小心把自己的英语字典丢了,这本字典对你意义重大。你在夏令营的BBS上刊登了寻物启事后,一个英国营友Jim捡到,并四处打听到你后,立即还给了你,你很感激他,请根据以上内容写一封感谢信。

注意:

1. 开头和结尾已写好,不计入总词数;

2. 词数110左右。

参考词汇:summer camp 夏令营

Dear Jim,

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Yours,

Li Hua

●分析:

本次写作任务是一封感谢信(Letters of Thanks / Thank-you Letters),其格式和一般信件一样。感谢信是对他人给予的帮助表达你的感激和谢意的一种文体。感谢信正文应该包括感谢的事由和你的感激之辞。就本次写作任务而言,我们要从以下两方面展开:

1. 简述整件事的过程,说明写感谢信的原因:这本字典对你而言的意义何在;Jim在捡到字典后,四处打听、不厌其烦,令人感动。我们在说明感谢原由的时候,应把握住这两个细节,这样才能使感谢信合情合理。另外要注意把握篇幅,避免拖沓。

2. 表达感激之情。在这一段中,做个综述即可。表达感激之情后,我们还可以顺带捎上祝福的话语,就本文而言,可以热情地邀请他来中国旅游,或者表达你想和他保持联系的想法等等,这样就是一篇完整的感谢信了。表达感激的话语有:I appreciate (am thankful for) your help. I’m really appreciated that ...I’m grateful that ...

●初稿:

Dear Jim,

I’m Li Hua. I’m very thankful for you helping me find my missed dictionary. I found my dictionary was left in the summer camp, which was given by my mother on my birthday. It is very precious and important for me. I put a "lost advertisement" on the Internet. But I think it may be lost forever. Therefore I was very sad. I was very thankful when you returned the dictionary to me for free. When you found this dictionary, you weren’t afraid of troubles to ask about me. How hard it was! Thank you so much. I hope everything goes well.

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

文章涵盖了所有要点内容,句子结构富于变化,词汇和表达切合题目要求,但初稿在格式和表达上仍存在问题,具体表现在:

1. 在书信中,写信人的姓名一般写在书信的结尾处,所以在文章的开头不用做自我介绍。

2. "非常感激某人做某事"的表达方式为:be thankful to sb. for something / doing

something。此句可以改为I’m very thankful to you for helping me find my (lost) dictionary.

3. 词语的用法上:注意"丢失的"表达方法,一般用作表语,因此"丢失的词典"表达为:lost dictionary或The dictionary is missing。

●成稿:

Dear Jim,

I’m writing to thank you for all your help and kindness. This English dictionary was a gift to me from my mother, and I treasure it dearly. Unfortunately, I accidentally left it at the summer camp when I went home. Luckily, you came across the dictionary and didn’t decide to keep it. Instead, you asked about its owner and spared no effort to find me. I am sure it wasn’t easy for you to find me. I am very grateful to you for returning it. I hope that good luck follows you wherever you go.

Yours,

Li Hua

●赏析:

文章涵盖了要点内容,条理清楚,叙述清晰。在第二段中,将事由清晰而有层次地表达了出来。另外,作者还注意了句式的变化和高级词汇的使用。而且,合适的连接词的使用,使句子流畅、过渡自然,例如Unfortunately ,Luckily等显示了作者较好的语言运用能力。此外,全文的整体语气也很得体。

●Powerful sentences:

1. I would like to thank you for ...

2. I was impressed with ...

3. I am looking forward to ...

4. With kindest regards.

●巩固练习:

假如你叫杨华,在你16岁生日这天,收到了英国笔友Ken邮寄给你的生日礼物,是一套《哈利·波特》的英文原版,这套书你在书店找了很久都因脱销而没有买到,你很喜欢Ken的这份生日礼物。请你以此给Ken写一封感谢信。

要求:1. 条理清楚,叙述详尽;

2. 词数100左右;

3. 参考词汇:《哈利·波特》Harry Potter

第6期巩固练习参考范文:

Dear Ken,

I’m writing to thank you for your thoughtful gift.

As far as I can remember, I only mentioned my birthday once. To my surprise, you remember it correctly and mailed an expensive gift overseas. I felt very moved when I received it. The Harry Potter books are my favorite and I’m crazy about learning English. Once I went to look for the English version of this classic novel in several different shops, but it was out of stock everywhere. I was really disappointed. Now you have sent it to me as a birthday gift. You can’t imagine how happy I am upon receiving such a gift!

Thanks again for your gift. I’m looking forward to meeting you this summer.

Yours,

Yang Hua

38. Great People and Great Inventions

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你是李华。你的外国朋友Lucy对中国诗人李白很感兴趣,写信向你询问有关诗人的相关资料,现请你根据下面的中文材料,写一封回信,向她介绍李白。词数:120左右。

英语写作指导及范文

参考词汇:

1. 诗仙Poetic Immortal

2. 《静夜思》In the Still of the Night

写作分析:

本次写作任务要求写一封信介绍中国古代的著名诗人李白,属于描写性文章。描写性文章是对人物、物体、场景、景观等进行描述的一种文体,一般是通过描述物体的外部特征或人物的内心感受来突出所描述对象的特点。本次写作任务为人物描写。人物描写除了对人物的外貌、语言、动作、内心活动或精神面貌进行正面描述来反映该人物的性格特点外,还可以从其他人对人物的态度或评价来侧面描述人物。为了使人物形象逼真、性格鲜明,同学们要善于观察,抓住描写对象的独特之处,并精于语言技巧,用生动活泼的语言再现人物鲜明的形象和性格特征。

针对本次写作任务,题目中已经以表格的形式给出诗人李白的相关信息,因此,同学们可以根据表格中的信息对人物进行描述,以突出李白的人物特点,从而使读者对李白有清晰、完整的了解和认识。文章从结构上来说可以简单地分为三个部分:信件第一段应该有对描述对象总体的介绍,可以用一两句话对李白的身份和名声进行简单地说明。第二段对人物进行具体地描述,如李白诗作的特点、后人对他的评价、他的性格特点以及有什么特别的癖好等。同学们可以结合自己对诗人本身的了解适当补充信息,充分发挥。最后可以用简单的一句话阐述自己对李白这位诗人的看法或表达对收信人的期望和祝福。在描写过程中,要注意层次分明、用词精准。需要注意的是,在写描写性文章的时候,不要对内容进行逐句翻译,这样只会使文章读起来平淡乏味,人物的性格特点不够鲜明。

初稿:

Dear Lucy,

I’m so glad that you’re interested in the Chinese poet Li Bai, and I’d love to tell you what I know about him.Li Bai was born in the Tang Dynasty. He was named as "Poetic Immortal". One of his great poems is called In the Still of the Night. His poems are full of romance. Li Bai is a bold man who loves freedom very much. He also loves drinking when he creates poems. I like Li Bai and his poems very much. That’s all I have learned about him. And do you know more about him? Please write me back soon.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

从结构上来看,这篇文章涵盖了表格中的全部要点,开头和结尾基本符合信件的要求规范,但是有一些问题需要引起注意。首先,文章对于人物的描写只是对照表格中的信息逐条翻译,平淡乏味,给人以生硬的感觉,建议重新组织语句,并适当加入自己的见闻进行描述。其次,文章的过渡不够自然。"作品浪漫、性格豪爽、追求自由、喜爱饮酒"初稿中都有进行描述,但怎样将这几个要点连贯通顺地组成文章呢?这是行文流畅的关键。初稿缺乏衔接语句和连接词,读后给人以平铺直叙的感觉。最后,初稿词数偏少,不符合题目要求,这些都应在成稿中加以改进。

成稿:

Dear Lucy,

I’m so glad that you’re interested in the Chinese poet Li Bai, and I’d love to tell you what I know about him.

Li Bai is one of the most famous poets of the Tang Dynasty. His poems are so great that he’s known as the "Poet Immortal". In addition, his poems are full of romance and imagination, such as his most famous one, In the Still of the Night.

Li Bai loved freedom very much, which was reflected in his poems. What’s more, he also

loved to drink while he was creating poems, and it seemed that drinking was able to inspire him. That’s what I know about Li Bai. Now do you know much more about him?

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

经过修改之后,成稿在对人物的描述上更加清晰完整,比起初稿,令人耳目一新。在过渡方面,也有很大进步,像"in addition, what’s more"这些短语的使用,不仅巧妙自然地衔接起前后句,还使作者清晰合理的写作思路跃然纸上。此外,成稿中作者对李白的描写更丰富,并增加了些许自己的观点,令其更加丰满,也可使李白的性格特点更加鲜明。最后,成稿体现了作者良好的语言功力,如His poems are so great that he’s known as the "Poet Immortal".和Li Bai loved freedom very much, which is reflected in his poems. 的使用为文章增色不少。

Powerful Sentences:

1. ... is so famous in China that he W she is known as ...

2. He died of ... , leaving the world more than ... poems W paintings W novels W ...

3. His work is considered a great contribution to the development of Chinese literature.

4. In his W her poems W paintings W novels W ..., you can find ...

5. During his W her life, ... has created more than ..., most of them are remembered as ... 巩固练习:

人类创造了很多伟大的发明。现请你写一篇文章投稿至校刊英文版的"伟人与发明"栏目,向同学们介绍一项发明。词数:120左右。

提示:可从其发明者、用途及为人们带来的好处等方面进行介绍。

本期巩固练习参考范文

Edison and the Light Bulb

The electric light bulb, invented by Thomas Edison, is one of the greatest human inventions. Edison was born in a middle-class family in 1847. As a child, he was very interested in science, and he always wanted to know how things worked. As an adult he invented many things, but is best known for the electric light bulb. As we all know, the light bulb greatly changed our lives, helping us do many things we couldn’t do before. With it, people could read, cook, and do their homework even after dark. This invention has influenced people’s daily lives in almost every corner of the world, such as in hospitals, schools, shops and so on. It’s almost impossible to imagine what our lives would be like without it.

39. Great Women

写作指导

写作任务:

假设你在某国际网站的论坛看到一个关于"Who Is the Greatest Woman?"的票选。下面给出三个备选人物,请你写一篇英语短文,做出自己的选择发表在该论坛上。要点如下:

1. 做出选择并简单介绍该人物;

2. 说明选择该人物的理由;3. 从该人物身上得到的启发。

要求:1. 理由充分,行文流畅,语言精炼;2. 120词左右。

Margaret Thatcher

the only female

Prime Minister of United Kingdom; iron lady

Helen Keller

an ordinary but great American woman; blind writer

Ziyi Zhang

world-famous film star

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是人物说明,包括对人物的描述与得到的启发,属于议论文范畴。写作任务要求通过事实材料来阐明自己的看法和观点,考查的是学生对信息的组织处理能力。题目中给出的信息非常简单,看起来似乎不好把握,但仔细分析就会发现,三位候选人物都是我们所熟悉的。对于人物描写与介绍,我们可以从人物的不同侧面,比如贡献、人格等方面入手。建议先确定描写的人物,再依据人物来组织材料。其中对人物的具体介绍与得到的启发是文章写作的主体。此类文章一般会用到这样的结构:Topic sentence: supporting material A, supporting material B. Conclusion.

2. 就本次写作任务而言,文章将分成三部分来写。第一部分,简单介绍自己选择的人物,从而引出文章的主体部分;第二部分,即文章主体,说明自己的理由,即对人物的具体介绍。此部分紧紧围绕所选人物进行,比如坚持不懈的奋斗精神、人格魅力和教育意义等,所以会用到比较积极的、励志的词语,如determination, encourage, struggle, inspire, admire等。第三部分,具体说明自己得到的启发,即对自己的激励以及由此所产生的变化,这也是本文的主体部分。

3. 在语言方面,由于涉及到对人物的介绍与描写,所以要注意材料的真实性和语言的准确、平实,此外还要注意使用形容词和副词来丰富语言,使人物更加鲜活。

初稿:

Who Is the Greatest Woman?

I will choose Helen Keller.

Why is she the greatest woman? She set a good example to blind people. She became blind and deaf when she was young. Later her teacher came and her life changed. She learned to speak and even graduated from college. As a blind writer, she wrote many books to encourage other blind people. She gave lectures all over the world and collected money for the blind. Helen Keller influences me very much. I admire her determination. Again and again she failed, but she never gave up until she won each battle. I will learn from her. No matter what difficulties there are, I’ll work hard to realize my dreams.

初稿点评:

这篇文章从整体上来说结构完整,行文流畅,三段式的结构使文章清晰明了;材料组织较为充分,足以支持主题;作者采用层层递进法把文章推向一个高度:首先明确写作对象Helen Keller,接着说明她的伟大之处,最后通过描写Helen Keller对自己的影响把文章推向高潮。但文章也存在一些不足之处:

1. 从结构上看,文章虽然分成了三部分进行构思写作,但是语言过于啰嗦,结构较松散。如第一部分开篇直接表明自己的观点I will choose Helen Keller显得太过唐突,后文也没有对Helen Keller 做简单介绍;第二部分开头Why is she the greatest woman?没有必要,应该直接切入主题,介绍Helen Keller的伟大之处;对于第三部分的启发,也是文章的主体部分,应该重点构思,使文章的内涵得到升华。

2. 句子之间的连贯性差,而且语言显得重复累赘。如第二部分的句子之间承接的不是很好,过渡不自然;最后一部分Helen Keller influences me very much.和I admire her determination.略显重复,这是同学们应该注意的地方。

成稿:

Who Is the Greatest Woman?

Among so many great women in the world, I vote for Helen Keller as the greatest one. She’s

an ordinary, but great American woman.

Born in America, Helen Keller became blind and deaf at an early age. However, she not only

learned to speak but also went to college. The wonder lay in her teacher and her own determination. In order to help more blind people, she wrote many books to inspire them. In

addition to this, she also gave lectures around the world to help collect money for the blind. Although she has passed away, her spirit of courage and hope remains.

Helen has set an excellent example to all of us and her story has inspired me greatly. No

matter what difficulties might lay ahead of me, I’ll work hard to make my dreams come true.

教师点评:

成稿结构完整、构思合理,注重措词的精确性和句式的多样性,人物形象更为丰满;一些衔接词的使用如not only ... but also ... ,although使内容衔接更为紧密;文章行文流畅、思路清晰、过渡自然。此外,成稿注意了语言的简洁性,这样整篇文章主题突出,段落分明,层层递进,最终文章在思想境界上达到升华,很容易与读者产生思想上的共鸣。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Owing to her perseverance, she finally ...

2. She is the example of all ...

3. He inspires me more than ...

4. Like a star, his brilliant light never dims.

巩固练习:

请你写一篇英语短文来描写对你影响最……的一个人,参加你校的英语演讲比赛。要点

如下:1. 介绍此人;2. 说明理由;3. 对自己所产生的影响。

要求:1. 句子连贯,过渡自然,行文流畅;2. 120词左右。

本期参考范文

The Person Who Influenced Me Most

As to the person who influenced me most, I think it is my father. His active attitude and

patience influenced me greatly. My father is a teacher and he is very optimistic. He often tells me that life consists of not only sunshine but also hard time. Every time I have a difficulty, he would encourage me: Cheer up! God will never fail a person who works hard. Keep on trying! In addition to this, my father is very patient with me. He says that those who make no mistakes achieve nothing, so my father never blamed me whenever I made a mistake; on the contrary, he always helps me work out solutions to my problems, which I always accept gladly.

All in all, we are more friends than just father and son. With my father around, I always feel

love, warmth and strength.

40. Great Women

写作指导

写作任务:

假设你班要在英语口语课上举行一次主题为"Great Women"的报告会,你们小组准备介

绍南丁格尔(Florence Nightingale),下面表格里是你们收集到的有关她的资料,请你代表你们小组写一篇120词左右的报告。

英语写作指导及范文

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是根据表格所提供的内容写一篇介绍南丁格尔的文章,属于记叙文,宜用过去时态,短文应包含全部要点。

2. 本文的写作难点在于要使各写作要点衔接自然流畅,做到条理清晰,层次分明。 初稿:

Florence Nightingale was born on May 12, 1820 to a rich English family in Italy. She had accepted a very good education since her childhood. Against her family, she decided to devote herself to the nursing of the sick.

She accepted a nursing training in Germany. Her dream to be a nurse was realized then. In 1854, the Crimean War broke out. She led 38 nurses to take care of the British soldiers. She was well known as "the lady with the lamp" to all England. In October, 1860, she established a formal nurses’ school. This is her greatest contribution.

To honor this great woman, her birthday, May 12th, is now known as International Nurses’ Day.

教师点评:

文章基本覆盖了所提供的人物信息,行文简明扼要,语言运用比较准确,较好地完成了写作任务,但仍存在一些不足之处:

1. 文章遗漏了其中一个要点:"夜深人静……",即关于"提灯女士"的来历。

2. 语法错误:She had accepted a very good education since ...中的accepted应改为

received。

3. 文章主要使用了简单句,因此上下文之间缺少连贯性,文章结构略显松散。

成稿:

Florence Nightingale, one of the world’s greatest nurses, was born in Italy on May 12, 1820, to a wealthy British family. She received a good education, and against her family’s wishes she decided to devote herself to nursing. She went to Germany to learn to be a nurse.

In 1854, the Crimean War broke out. Leading 38 nurses, she went there to take care of the British soldiers. When it was dark, she would make her rounds holding a little lamp. So she was called "the lady with the lamp".

In October, 1860, she opened a school to train nurses. To honor this great woman, her birthday became International Nurses’ Day in 1974.

Florence Nightingale sets a shining example because of the love and help that she gave to so many people.

教师点评:

1. 成稿层次分明,前后呼应。首段第一句话概括南丁格尔在历史上有什么地位,结尾段又用一句话对人物作了评价,再次点题。

2. 由于连词和从句的恰当运用,文章结构严密,错落有致,自然流畅。

3. 作者运用了一些地道的句子,显示出扎实的写作功底。比如:When it was dark, she would make her rounds holding a little lamp.

Powerful Sentences:

1. ... was born to a wealthy / poor family.

2. ... received a good education.

3. ... was known as ... to everyone.

4. His / Her ... spirit is a shining example.

5. ... is celebrated around the world to remember ...

巩固练习:

根据下面提示,用英语写一篇介绍著名美国作家赛珍珠(Pearl S. Buck)的短文。(词数:120左右)

1. 1892年6月26日出生于美国,由于父母是中国的传教士(missionary),她在中国长大。长大后回国接受教育,大学毕业后又回到中国生活,一直到19xx年。

2. 她20世纪20年代开始写作,一生写了70余部作品,其中小说《大地》(The Good Earth)获得普利策文学奖(the Pulitzer Prize in literature)。19xx年,赛珍珠获得了诺贝尔文学奖,她是第一位获此殊荣的美国女性。

3. 晚年,赛珍珠做了很多事去帮助那些需要帮助的人,她还成立了一个机构以帮助那些贫穷的亚裔美国儿童。(参考范文见下期)上期写作指导参考范文

本期参考范文

Pearl S. Buck was born in America on June 26, 1892, but grew up in China, since her parents were missionaries there. She received her education in America. After graduation from university, she returned to China, and lived there until 1934. So she spent most of her life in China. She began to write in the 1920s, and wrote over seventy works in all. Her novel The Good Earth earned her the Pulitzer Prize in literature. In 1938, Pearl won the Nobel Prize for Literature, becoming the first American woman to win this award. In her later years, she did many things for the needy. She even set up an organization to help poor Asian-American children. Pearl S. Buck was important to both the Chinese and Americans.

41. Health

写作指导

●写作任务:

最近在湖北5所学校中,研究人员就学习时间和患近视眼的关系对100名学生进行了访谈。请根据以下的调查结果,写一篇120词左右的文章说明调查结果,并发表自己的看法。

英语写作指导及范文

near-sighted:近视的

要求:描述表格内容并分析其原因,段首已为你写好,不计入词数。

A survey has recently been carried out among five schools in Hubei Province to find out the reasons for near-sightedness in senior middle school students, with 100 senior students being interviewed.

______________________________________________________________________________________________

________

●任务分析:

本次的写作任务是图表作文。图表作文要求学生首先了解图表的制作目的及其所展示的内容,进而准确清晰地进行分析、描述与概括,最后得出结论。图表常常是通过数据和事实对比说明问题。一般在图表作文写作中采取以下几个步骤:

1. 审查图表,了解表格、数据、分类、横行、纵列及比例和时间之间的逻辑关系。就本次写作任务而言,分纵横两个方向比较,即年级和比例两个方面。

2. 如实描述图表内容,条理清楚,不加评论。对表格的数据进行一定的描述,为下文的分析做铺垫。

3. 文章不应仅停留在对数据的描述上,对表格和数据背后所隐含的信息进行分析和挖掘是图表作文的写作重点。同学们要能从表面的数字看出所反映的实质问题,并对问题的原因加以分析讨论,最后得出结论。

分析本次写作任务的表格内容,我们不难得出如下规律:年级越高,学习时间越久,近视的人数比例越高。其原因主要有:高考的压力和老师布置的家庭作业随着年级的升高均有增加的趋势。作者可结合自身的经历做合理的发挥,然后再给出相对应的建议。比如就文章中学习时间越来越长的问题,我们可以建议学生采取有效的学习方法,提高学习效率,或者把集中学习的时间划分为几部分。作者也可给出其他有建设性的意见,只要合情合理即可。

文章可以由三个部分构成:第一部分简要说明图表主题;第二部分对图表内容进行描述;第三部分根据图表数据资料进行分析,得出结论并给出建议。

●初稿:

A survey has recently been carried out among five schools in Hubei Province to find out the reasons for near-sightedness in senior middle school students, with 100 senior students being interviewed.

By taking a talk, we get to know how many students are near-sighted. 55% of students in Grade One who study an hour after school are near-sighted, while 60% of students in Grade Two who study two hours each day after school are near-sighted. In Grade Three, 70% of students that study three hours a day after school are near-sighted.

We can conclude that the higher the grade, the heavier the study burden and so the more students that become near-sighted.

In order to reduce the number of near-sighted students, schools should reduce the burden on the students. The students should also look for better studying methods.

●教师点评:

本篇作文的开头对表格的分析比较具体翔实,体现了作者阅读表格的能力,但文章在结构和内容的充实方面还要做出如下改进:

1. 文章对表格进行描述后仅做了简单的总结,并未深入分析导致近视的原因,使数据失去了支持论点的意义,因此文章应该继续深入,说明学习时间的增加和近视率的提高都反映了高考给学生带来的巨大压力这一问题,并具体说明高考的压力与近视的关系。

2. 此外,需要展开的建议部分,略显仓促和草率,可能是作者看到字数超过要求就赶紧收尾造成的,因此作者要进一步合理地安排好文章内容。

3. 有些地方用词欠妥。如,take a talk是谈话的意思,但这里更多的是调查问卷的意思,应换为interview。在句式上,当描述排列或并列的事物时,不要用单一的表达法,动词稍有所变化会更生动一些,如:Grade Three studying three hours accounts for 70%.

●成稿:

A survey has recently been carried out among five schools in Hubei Province to find out the reasons for near-sightedness in senior middle school students, with 100 senior students being interviewed.

From this chart, we can see that time spent on study increases as the grade increases and the percentage of near-sighted students increases from 55% in grade one to 70% in grade three. The higher the grade is, the more students that become near-sighted.

The reason for this phenomenon is the pressure from the College Entrance Examination. Students spend every minute of every day studying for this exam and some of them are so absorbed in their work and hold a fixed posture for such a long period of time that their eyes don’t get enough time to rest.

To protect their eyesight, students should improve the efficiency of their studies. Long study hours should be divided into several parts, so that they can allow their eyes to rest.

●成稿赏析:

修改后的文章行文流畅、用词准确,显示了作者较好的基本功。文章句式丰富,富于变化,长句短句相结合,交替出现,避免了句式的单一呆板。和原稿相比,本文在分析原因和提出建议部分都处理得很到位。

●Powerful sentences:

1. According to / As is shown in / As can be seen from the table (diagram / graph / figures / picture / cartoon), we can see clearly that ...

2. The purpose of this picture is to tell us (show us / indicate / suggest) that ...

3. The figure indicates (shows / proves / suggests) that ...

●巩固练习:

在现代社会里,人们越来越注重健康。请你以"Healthy Life"为题写一篇120词左右的英语短文,倡导一种健康的生活方式。提示:你可以从保持健康的方法、摒弃不良习惯等方面展开。

本期巩固练习参考

Healthy Life

As everyone knows, we can benefit a lot from a healthy lifestyle; however, many people don’t know how to stay healthy although they may have made great efforts in this regard. If we want to maintain a healthy lifestyle, we’d better take the following advice. Firstly, we should have the right kind of diet. Eat plenty of high protein foods, vegetables and fruits. Do not overeat. Secondly, we should get the proper amount of sleep. Allow ourselves at least eight hours of sleep each day. Have a nap at noon if time permits. Thirdly, we should exercise regularly, because "life depends on exercise". Regular exercise strengthens our hearts and lungs. Finally, get rid of bad habits like smoking and drinking alcohol.

Leading such a lifestyle can guarantee more happiness in our lives.

42. Healthy Eating

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你们班要在英语课上分组讨论"How to Keep Healthy"这一话题, 你代表你们组总结发言, 请你根据下面的表格提示用英语写一篇120词左右的发言稿。

英语写作指导及范文

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是根据提示写一篇有关"如何保持身体健康"的文章,应以一般现在时为主,短文应包括全部要点,并且各要点之间的衔接要自然流畅。这也是提纲式作文的写作难点。

2. 写作提示已经勾勒出文章的结构层次,写作时应从三个方面入手:锻炼、饮食、休息,使用主题句,后面加以阐述。这样才能使文章条理清晰、行文简明扼要。

初稿:

Nowadays more and more people worry about their health. How can we keep healthy?

First of all, we should spend some time in taking exercise. For example, we can walk to school or ride a bike to school instead of taking a bus. We can walk upstairs or downstairs. Doing some housework is also a form of exercise.

Secondly, we should have a balanced diet, which means eating various kinds of food. Experts suggest us eating more fresh fruit and vegetables and less meat.

Lastly, it is also very important to get enough sleep. Those who are always busy with their work will ruin their health. And, good sleep will help us relax.

That’s all. Thank you.

教师点评:

初稿的时态运用正确,包含了所有的写作要点。不足之处:

1. 缺少总结。最后文章应对所陈述的信息进行概括总结,才会使全文完整,有说服力。

2. 用词不当。如:Nowadays more and more people worry about their health. 句中的worry about 应改为are concerned about, 反映当代人对自身健康的关注。

成稿:

As we all know, more and more people are concerned about their health nowadays. The question is, how can we keep healthy?

First of all, doing exercise makes our bodies stronger. Although we are busy with schoolwork every day, we can still spare some time for exercise. For example, we can walk or ride a bike to school instead of taking the bus. We can walk upstairs or downstairs instead of taking lifts. Helping our parents do some housework is another way to get exercise.

Secondly, we should have a balanced diet. Experts say that we should eat more fresh fruit and vegetables and less meat.

Finally, it is also important to get enough sleep. People who are always on the go from morning till night will ruin their health because too much stress can be very harmful.

In a word, doing exercise, having a balanced diet and getting enough sleep contribute to better health.

That’s all. Thank you!

教师点评:

1. 第一段提出问题,最后一段总结方法,首尾呼应。中间三段阐述了三种保持健康的方法,详略得当,每段还各有一句主题句。文章条理清晰,结构严谨。

2. 用词准确且富于变化,行文生动活泼。例如:

People who are always on the go from morning till night will ruin their health because too much stress can be very harmful.

Powerful Sentences:

1. Nowadays more and more people are concerned about ...

2. It is very important for ... to spend some time doing ...

3. As the old saying goes, ...4. Last but not least, it is also very important to ...

巩固练习:

某英文杂志"中学生习作"专栏正在征集稿件。请根据以下信息,以"I Prefer Chinese Food"为题目向该专栏投稿。

东方饮食

烹调方法多样化;在食物选择上广搜博取,营养均衡;蔬菜和水果占很大比例,有利于身体健康。

西方饮食

烹调方法简单易行;食物中糖和脂肪含量高,有害身体,尤其对牙齿和心脏不好。

要求:

1. 短文的内容要连贯、完整;

2. 词数:120左右。

本期写作指导参考范文

I Prefer Chinese Food Many teenagers like Western food very much. However, I have a deep love for Chinese food.

Firstly, the Chinese people have many different skills of cooking. For example, a chicken can be cooked in over ten ways. Chinese food is very popular in the world. Westerners mostly boil, steam, and bake the food.

Secondly, the Chinese people have a balanced diet. Most importantly, the Chinese people have a lot of fruit and vegetables every day, which does good to health. So, the Chinese people can keep fit and have healthy teeth. However, Western food usually contains too much sugar and fat, which are harmful to the body, especially to heart and teeth. So facing the two kinds of food, I’d choose Chinese food for sure.

43. Help the Need

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你在报纸上看到了题为"爱心中国之星——丛飞"的相关报道,要点如下表所示:

英语写作指导及范文

英语写作指导及范文

请根据以上材料,并结合你所了解的信息,谈谈自己的感想。(词数:120左右)参考词汇:眼角膜cornea n.

●写作分析:

本次写作任务是写读后感,顾名思义,这篇作文应包含两方面的内容,即读与感,那么文章也因此可以大体分为两部分。把握了这点后,我们就要合理安排篇幅,切忌一一罗列事迹或抛开材料自我发挥。材料和感想,两手都要抓。

在展开文章时,我们需要注意以下几点:

1. 简明扼要地介绍丛飞的事迹。从表格所提供的内容就可以发现丛飞的事迹很多,再加上个人对丛飞相关事迹的了解,两者加起来,仅仅丛飞生平的介绍就要占很大篇幅,何况还有感想呢?在这样的情况下,我们要有分寸地取舍。我们往往选择最重要的材料来突出人物。值得一提的是,在结合材料列举英雄事迹时,还要做到"短小精悍",意即篇幅不长,但足以为下文谈感想做好铺垫。

2. 文章的构思和结构都成熟后,就要用心地表达了。在从事迹谈到感想时,我们可以用这样的句子来过渡:Having read Cong Fei’s story, I am deeply moved by his generous spirit. 或Cong Fei died of cancer in April, 2006, which made us in deep sorrow.

●初稿:

Cong Fei, is a 37-year-old singer in the South China City of Shenzhen in Guangdong Province. Over the past 11 years he spent at least 3 million yuan to help 178 poor children pay for school expenses. Unfortunately, he can not pay for his medical expenses after he got cancer. He decided to give his corneas to the need ofter his death. Cong Fei’s story gave me a deep thought. It became an impossible story in modern society. We always complain that everyone is selfish, especially relating to money. Now I think helping others can bring us more happiness which money can not buy. Cong Fei sets a good example to us and I believe there will be more Cong Feis.

●教师点评:

该习作基本完成了写作任务,文章涵盖了要点内容且叙述详尽,把所给材料和个人所掌握的信息有效地结合起来,如:Unfortunately, he can not pay for his medical expenses ... 但遗憾的是时态弄错了,应该避免此类错误。另外,注意用词的准确性和感情色彩的表达,注意同义词的细微差别,并巩固基础语法知识。存在的主要问题如下:

1. 本文的开头Cong Fei, is a 37-year-old singer in the South China City of Shenzhen in Guangdong Province.时态应为过去时。

2. 句子Unfortunately, he can not pay for his medical expenses中can not的时态应改为过去时。而且not pay for不能准确地表达"负担不起"的意思,可换为afford。

3. It became an impossible story in modern society. "became"表达不准确,应使用"seems like"。

●成稿:

Cong Fei was a 37-year-old singer in the city of Shenzhen in Guangdong Province. Over about 11 years he spent at least 3 million yuan to help 178 poor children pay for school. Unfortunately, he could not afford his medical expenses after getting cancer. After he died on April 20, 2006, when he was 37, his corneas were given to someone who needed them.

Cong Fei’s story made me think very deeply. It seems like an impossible story in modern

society. We always complain that everyone is selfish, especially when it comes to money. Now I think that helping others can bring us happiness that money cannot buy. Cong Fei has set a good example to us and I hope that there will be more people like Cong Fei in the near future. ●Powerful Sentences:

1. A heated discussion began after his story was published.

2. His actions taught us that helping others can bring us happiness.

●巩固练习:

据统计,在我国等待眼角膜移植的病人有200万例,全国各大医院每年可以完成的眼角膜移植手术总共却只有2000-2500例,其最主要的原因就是眼角膜的来源问题。而在西方国家情况就大不一样,美国每年的眼角膜捐献达到10万多只,而美国本国的需要量只有4万多只。据此请你写一篇文章,谈谈这事实背后的原因以及应该采取什么措施。(词数:120左右)可参考以下提示:原因:主要受"身体发肤,受之父母,不敢毁伤"等传统观念的影响措施:应加大宣传力度参考词汇:捐赠donate v.

本期写作指导参考范文

According to a survey report, cornea supplies have fallen short of demand in hospitals in China. It is the opposite in Western countries. In the USA, for example, there are more than 100,000 corneas donated, while only 40,000 corneas are needed.

This reflects differences between different cultures and countries. Many Chinese people believe that their bodies, including the skin and hair, are given by their parents and the organs should not be removed from the body. The problem is that even something small can make a big difference in another person’s life. In order to change the present situation, the government should help more people understand the importance of donating organs, such as corneas, and change the traditional way of thinking. In this way, patients in hospitals who need corneas will have a better future.

44. Hobbies

写作任务:

假如你是某中学的高一学生李华,你想通过网络找一个英国笔友练习英语,交流心得体会。请根据下面表格里的内容,写一篇120词左右的短文,介绍你自己。

英语写作指导及范文

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是根据表格内容写一篇自我介绍的文章,重点介绍个人兴趣爱好,属于记叙文。时态以现在时为主。

2. 本文写作难点在于合理安排文章结构。因为需要写的要点较多,所以要做到条理清晰、层次分明。短文可分为三段,第一段介绍基本情况及写这篇短文的目的;第二段包括性格、

特长、爱好等方面的内容,是写作重点,注意不要逐条翻译;第三段为结束段,表达想找朋友分享快乐的愿望。

3. 短文要着重介绍自己的兴趣爱好,因此要注意词语和句型的变换。

初稿:

My name is Li Hua, a 16-year-old girl. I’m in Grade 1 in a senior middle school. I like English and have many kinds of hobbies. So, I would like to find a pen pal to practice English. And we may share the feelings on hobbies.

My character is humorous. And I’m get-ting on well with my classmates. After school, we often play football together. I’m also interested in traveling, which can increase my knowledge and make me stronger. To be more important, I have made many friends by traveling. Besides, I’m interested in music, especially pop music. Above all, I like English very much, and I once got the first place in the English competition in my school. And I want to make greater progress in English. For this reason, I try to make every chance to practice English.

If you are interested, you can get contact with me. My E-mail is Lh-808@yahoo.com. I’m looking forward to hearing your reply.

教师点评:

短文结构安排较为合理,开头和结尾前后呼应,表达了作者想找笔友的愿望。并且还运用了恰当的过渡词,使文章衔接自然、流畅。但是也存在一些不足之处:

1. 本文没有覆盖所有要点,漏掉了乐于助人的性格和集邮这一爱好。另外,作者直接翻译了一些要点,行文略显生硬。如:My character is humorous ...

2. 在介绍爱好时,句型缺少变化,行文显得单调。

成稿:

I’m Li Hua, a 16-year-old girl in Senior Grade 1. Being humorous and always ready to help, I get on well with my class-mates. English is my favorite subject, so I’d like to find a pen pal to practice English. We may, at the same time, share our feelings about hobbies. I have many different kinds of hobbies.

After school, I often play football with my friends. And traveling always brings me happiness. At the same time, I learn many things, and my body becomes much stronger. I also have a strong interest in collecting stamps, which enriches my life too. If you have spare stamps, we may exchange them. Furthermore, I’m fond of music, especially pop music.

However, all of these cannot be compared to my love for English. I once got the first place in the English competition in our school.

If you are interested, you can get contact with me. My E-mail is Lh-808@yahoo.com. I’m looking forward to becoming your friend.

教师点评:

1. 本文巧妙地将表格所列的要点的顺序做了适当地调整,顺利引出主题:以谈自己的爱好为重点向笔友介绍自己。

2. 文中所用短语词汇、语法结构比较丰富,体现了作者扎实的英语功底。如:different kinds of, Being humorous and always ready to help ..., look forward to等等。另外还运用了从句。 Powerful Expressions:(表达爱好)

show / have a deep love for

be interested in show / have great interest in

be fond of

be keen on have a taste for

have a preference for... always bring me happiness

巩固练习:

你们学校的英语校报招聘校园小记者,要求英语口语好,兴趣广泛。假如你叫王小英,请根据以下提示,以书信的形式写一段120词左右的个人简介去申请。1. 热情、大方、善于与人交流。2. 喜欢英语,曾经获得全市英语竞赛一等奖。3. 爱好音乐、绘画、摄影、体育等活动。 参考词汇:

申请v. apply for / n. application;

口语oral English

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Sir / Madam,

I’m Wang Xiaoying. I have learnt that our school newspaper needs an English journalist. I’m writing to apply for the post. As a warm-hearted and open-minded girl, I’m good at communicating with others. My favorite subject is English, which gives me a sense of success. My oral English is good and I once won the first prize in an English competition in our city. What’s more, I am interested in many things. For example, I enjoy music of many kinds. I’m fond of drawing and photography. I’m also a sports lover, especially ping-pong. I would be grateful if you take my application into consideration.

Yours sincerely,

Wang Xiaoying

45. Humor

写作指导

写作任务:

假设你班要在英语课上举行一次题为"My Favorite Artist"的报告会,你们小组准备介绍著名相声表演艺术家马季。下面是你们收集到的有关马季先生的资料,请你代表你们小组写一篇120词左右的英语短文。

1. 马季,19xx年生于北京,著名相声表演艺术家。

2. 苦涩的童年:14岁时,为养家糊口到上海一家纺织厂做工。

3. 后来师从相声大师侯宝林,不管多长的相声,他只要看过两遍就能背下来。他一边学习一边表演,从此开始了自己的演艺生涯。

4. 善于表演反映现实生活的相声作品,深受人们的喜爱。

5. 20xx年12月20日逝世于北京。

参考词汇:

1. 相声crosstalk

2. 纺织厂weaving factory

写作分析:

这篇习作是一篇人物介绍,属于记叙文。要求以提示内容为依据,对马季先生的生平给予准确和实事求是的叙述。

首先,使用时态时要注意"瞻前顾后",即记叙人物过去发生的事,通常用过去时,但评价一个人的时候,宜使用一般现在时。

其次,要注意代词的使用,即要适当地使用代词代替前面提到的人、物或事,从而达到行文简练。

初稿:

Ma Ji was born in Beijing in 1934. He is a well-known artist of crosstalk shows. His crosstalk shows always made his audience roar with laughter. His performance seems like the mirror of real life.

At the age of fourteen, Ma Ji had to take a part-time job in a weaving factory to support his family. His teacher was Hou Baolin, who was a great master in the area of crosstalk. Ma Ji was very clever and could remember all the crosstalk words easily no matter how long it was. He devoted himself to performing crosstalk shows.

On 20th December, 2006, Ma Ji died in Beijing, which brings deep sorrow to all of his fans. 教师点评:

这篇作文的优点在于运用了比较准确的语言,客观地对马季先生的生平进行了描述。

但是也存在一些不足之处,即句子与句子之间、事件和事件之间缺乏严密的逻辑性,行文不够紧凑。

成稿:

Ma Ji was born in Beijing in 1934. He is well-known for his crosstalk shows in China.

He had a very unhappy childhood. At the age of 14, he had to get a part-time job in a weaving factory to support his family. Then he met Hou Baolin, a great master of crosstalk. Hou was very surprised to find that Ma Ji could remember the crosstalk easily, no matter how long it was. After that, Ma Ji began to perform crosstalk shows. His performance, which was the mirror of real life, always made his audience roar with laughter, and were very popular in China.

On December 20th, 2006, Ma Ji died, which deeply saddened many of his fans.

教师点评:

本篇习作言简意赅,逻辑严谨,生动而真实地介绍了马季的生平和他在中国观众心目中的地位。能够准确地描写人物和事件之间的逻辑关系,不失为一篇佳作。

Powerful Sentences:

(描写人的句子)

1. Of all my teachers / friends, he impressed me the most.

2. He is a kind-hearted person and is always ready to help others.

3. He was always happy to help others and cared about others more than he cared about himself.

4. He was interested in ... when he was young.

5. He is someone that I think we can all learn from.

6. Such is ..., a kind and hard-working person. I’ll respect and love him forever.

巩固练习:

下面四幅图片描述的是星期天早上在Betty家的花园中发生的一件有趣的事。请你根据图片所提供的信息用英语为你校"英语园地"写一篇幽默故事,可适当增加一些情节。(词数:120左右)

本期参考范文

It was a sunny Sunday morning. Betty was playing with her dog in the garden. Suddenly she found some candy in her pocket. She took it out from her pocket, took off the packaging, held it to the dog, and said, "This is my favorite candy." Her dog smelled it for a while, but then it turned around and ran away. Betty shouted angrily at the dog, "You’ve made it dirty. Now you have to eat it!" Then, Betty’s neighbor, Tom, a naughty boy, rushed over to her, took the candy and ate it. Then, with a big smile on his face, he said, "Who were you shouting at? I love candy." "I was shouting at my dog!" Betty said and walked away. Tom just stood there without saying a word. Oh,

if only he could throw it up!

46. Humor

写作指导

写作任务:

幽默是一种生活智慧, 在人们日常生活中发挥着独特的作用。你是否留意过你身边的幽默?请写一篇短文记叙生活中的幽默之事,并发表在校刊英文版。词数:120左右。写作 分析:

本次写作任务要求记叙一件事表现生活中的幽默,并说明其发挥的作用,属于夹叙夹议体裁。通过审题可以得知,题目要求通过对一件事的记叙来体现幽默的作用。因此,本次写作仍应以记叙为主要表达方式,议论部分的作用是点明文章主题,即说明你认为幽默在生活中的作用或对你的影响是什么。因此在文章结构安排上,同学们要注意详略得当。写作重点应放在对此次事件的记叙上,记叙文体裁的写作同学们已练习过多次,在此不作赘述。

在第一段或文章开头,可以用一句话简单概述这件事,或引出事件中的主要人物。接下来是文章的正文部分,要求具体记叙事件。幽默是如何发生的?它是怎样令人感到有趣的?想要使读者在读后感到这种幽默,就要求同学们在记叙这件事时做到充分具体。同学们可以适当加入细节的描写,如人物的表情、动作和语言。但需要注意的是,细节描写不应占据大量篇幅,能表现主题即可。最后,用简练的一两句话点明文章的主题,如,幽默可以化解尴尬;幽默可以帮你与人沟通地更轻松;幽默让你保持积极的心态等等。抓住一点即可。在语言方面,形容词和副词的使用能够使文章读起来生动形象,充分体现出幽默的效果。既然是记叙生活中的事件,人称应使用第一人称或第三人称,时态为过去时。

初稿:

I love my grandfather very much. He is a person full of humor. I will tell you a story of him. One day at home, Grandfather was reading the newspaper. I noticed his grey hair standing in a mess. So I said to him, "Let me comb your hair, Grandfather."He smiled at me and asked, "Can you guess whose hair mine looks like?"I stared at his hair for a long time, but I couldn’t find out the answer. Then he told me, "Isn’t it like Einstein’s?"I laughed, and I felt very happy having such a funny grandfather. Whenever I meet difficulties, my grandfather’s smile and humor will encourage me to enjoy my life all the time.

教师点评:

初稿文章基本符合要求,而且故事描述也较为详尽,值得表扬的是文章用词和句法较为准确。但仍存在比较明显的问题。首先,文章通篇读后,没有表现出幽默所在,可读性不强。因此,同学们在选取写作素材时,一定要选择生活中有代表性的事例,能充分表现幽默在生活中发挥作用的事件。其次文章中的对话占据了过多篇幅,使文章读起来不够连贯,应在成稿中加以修改。最后,初稿的语言过于简单,缺少能够令文章精彩的形容词和副词,感觉较为平淡。 成稿:

My grandfather is an interesting old man who always brings laughter to us. He has grey and thin hair, but he always tells me that he is proud of it, which puzzles me a lot. One day, when I saw Grandfather reading the newspaper, I noticed his grey hair was in a mess. When I tried to comb it, he turned to me and asked whether I liked his hair or not. When I was thinking of how to reply, he said, "Don’t you think my hair looks like Einstein’s?"

Then I burst into laughter. I finally knew why Grandfather was proud of his hair. Whenever I meet difficulties, I always think of Grandfather’s humor, which encouraged me to enjoy life all the

time.

教师点评:

经过修改后的成稿,故事完整、主题突出、连贯通顺,是一篇不错的文章。首先,成稿丰富了事件内容,加入了初稿中缺失的部分"... but he always tells me that he is proud of it, which puzzles me a lot."以及"I finally knew why Grandfather was proud of his hair."所述事件完整,一个风趣幽默的爷爷的形象跃然纸上。另外在语言方面,成稿修正了初稿中对话过多的不足,以记叙为主要表达方式,文章读起来紧凑生动。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Humor is very important in our lives, and we can never have enough of it.

2. Without humor, life would be very boring.

3. Many students like Miss White because of her humorous teaching methods.

4. Humor not only makes us feel happy, it also helps us communicate more easily.

5. I believe that humor is one of the best ways to make life enjoyable.

巩固练习:

乐观的心态可以为我们的生活带来积极的影响。请你写一篇英语短文,叙述自己的一次亲身经历,说明乐观的心态对你的影响。

词数:120左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

This weekend, I hurt my arm badly while I was playing basketball with my friends. It was so painful that I couldn’t help crying out. My friends took me to the nearby hospital where I saw a little boy lying on a bed. He was going to have a very dangerous operation, but he still kept smiling. At that moment, I felt less painful. I also read the courage and confidence on the little boy’s face. Although the operation was dangerous, he was still very positive. In our lives, there are troubles now and then, but I think having a positive attitude will help us overcome these difficulties.

47. Language

写作指导

●写作任务:

你知道肢体语言(Body Language)是什么吗?你了解它在交际中的作用吗?假设你是某英文杂志的特约小记者,请你撰写一篇英文稿件,向大家介绍肢体语言。

内容要点:

1.肢体语言的定义;

2.举例说明肢体语言的含义;

3.说明它在日常交际中的作用。

写作要求:

1. 内容完整、主题明确;

2. 语句连贯,无语法错误;

3. 词数:120左右。

●写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务的体裁是说明文,要求对肢体语言这一抽象事物进行说明介绍。说明文是以解释说明为主要表达方式,对事物的性质、特点、功能做出客观、科学的解释,从而给人知识或传播信息的一种文体。本次写作任务的说明对象是抽象事物,因此介绍就无法从其形

态、构造等外部特征进行描述。为了让读者明白所介绍的事物,作者就要首先给其下定义以建立读者的初步概念,然后通过生活中的具体例子来深化印象,进而解释说明其含义。对于初步接触说明文的高一学生而言,只要能概括出抽象事物的定义并简单举例说明即可。

2. 文章的结构可以按照提示中给出的要点展开。首先对肢体语言进行简单定义,引出全文。所谓肢体语言就是用肢体和体态来表达交际内容的一种形式,其作用是交流信息。然后,举例说明肢体语言在日常生活中的使用。那么同学们可以考虑,人们在什么情况下会去使用肢体语言呢?人们经常使用的肢体语言又有哪些呢?第二部分同学们只需要对熟悉的生活实例进行客观描述即可。最后,点明肢体语言的作用。为什么人们要使用肢体语言呢?肢体语言同有声语言相比有什么优势呢?

在写作过程中,同学们要注意上下文的衔接,可以通过使用连词使段与段,句与句之间过渡自然,连贯通顺。

●初稿:

If we talk about communication, most people will think about words and sentences. But in daily lives we communicate more than just by speaking. Body language is also part of our language.

Body language such as eye-contact, touching, bowing and hand gestures can be widely used in daily communication. For example, shaking hands is helpful to keep good relationships with people. If anyone wants to shake hands with you, you should shake hands. And it is necessary to know when to shake hands and when not to. If you are not aware of these differences, you may offend people without even realizing it.

If you know well about body language, you can be really good at communication with different people.

●教师点评:

初稿文章结构清晰。三个段落各司其职,第一段引出话题。第二段举例说明肢体语言在日常交际中的运用。最后一段点明肢体语言在交际中的作用。在语言方面没有语法错误,语句较通顺连贯。但本文也有一些不足。文章第一段引出话题太过累赘,并没有对肢体语言进行有效定义。另外,第二段部分的内容过于单一,作者只以握手为例说明肢体语言在日常交际中的使用,读后感觉单调枯燥。且最后一段对于肢体语言的作用的说明不够充分具体。这些都应在成稿中改正。

●成稿:

Communication methods include not only spoken language but also body language. It refers to eye-contact, touching and the hand gestures people use to communicate with each other. Body language is widely used in our daily lives. People shake hands to greet each other when they meet. Some people use smiles as a way to show friendliness. They hug to express their love and frown to show their sadness. What’s more, students bow to express their respect to their teachers in school. Therefore, body language plays a very important role in daily communication. People use body language when they feel embarrassed to speak to each other. Body language is also very convenient, which enables people to express their feelings by simple gestures.

●教师点评:

成稿内容完整丰富,语言简洁通顺,上下文衔接自然,是一篇比较优秀的说明文范文。成稿按照内容要点的要求,分别对肢体语言的定义、使用和作用进行具体说明。值得称赞的是第二段的举例说明部分。作者通过使用较为丰富的实例令文章读起来丰富充实。最后一段对于肢体语言的作用的说明分为两点,结构清晰。在语言方面,成稿中加入了定语从句"... is also very convenient, which enables people to ... "及连接词,如what’s more和therefore,令语言更流畅。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. It is well known that ... is very important in our daily lives because ...

2. ... can not only ... , but also ...

3. ... is very important / convenient / helpful when people want to ...

4. ... can help you to ... when you ...

5. People use ... to improve their relationships.

●巩固练习:

如今,不少青少年在网络聊天的过程中经常使用一种被人们称为"火星文"的特殊文字。这种文字类似密码,由数字、字母或特殊符号组合而成。请你根据这一现象,写一篇120词左右的英语短文,刊登在你班的英文手抄报上。

内容要点:

1. "火星文"的定义;

2. 使用举例;

3. 流行的原因及影响。

参考词汇:火星文Martian Language

本期参考范文

Recently, a so-called Martian Language has become very popular among teenagers who often chat online. It is made up of numbers, letters and strange symbols that look like codes. Martian language is very strange to those who don’t use it. The word "3Q"means "thank you", and "U" has the same meaning as "you". If you say "Orz", it means that you really can’t believe something just has happened.

Some teenagers consider the Martian language as their own language. They send messages and write diary in this language so that their parents and teachers can’t understand their secrets. Also, teens regard the language as a fashion because of its special form.

Anyway, I think it is interesting as it can tell us more about teens and their lives.

48. Languages

写作指导

写作任务:

近年来"汉语热"在全球异常火爆,目前全世界学习汉语的外国人已超过3000万人,有100多个国家,2500余所大学开设汉语课。在一次英语课上,老师让学生们讨论"汉语热"这种现象背后的原因,讨论的结果主要包括以下三个方面:

1. 中国拥有悠久的历史;

2. 中国的经济发展迅速;

3. 国际交往日益频繁。

请你用英语写一篇120词左右的短文,总结这次课上讨论的结果,可适当发挥。

写作分析:

1. 这是一篇针对某种现象阐述原因的文章,因此文章的结构安排应为:第一部分介绍全球"汉语热"的现状;第二部分分析其成因:第三部分作总结。

2. 注意:介绍现状时一定要简单,分析成因才是文章的重心所在。

初稿:

Chinese fever has been spreading across the world. More than 30 million foreigners have been learning Chinese by various means. At the same time, 2,500 universities in more than one

hundred countries offer Chinese courses. Why does Chinese become so popular among foreigners? We think there are many reasons for it.

Firstly, China has over five thousand years of history. Secondly, more countries want to develop friendly relations with China. Thirdly, Chinese economy has rapidly developed and gained a completely new position in the world.

There is no doubt that the Chinese language will be more and more popular.

教师点评:

本文最大的优点是文章结构完整: 介绍现状、分析成因、总结。而最大的缺点则是对写作任务的理解有偏差。本题要求总结讨论"汉语热"背后形成的原因,可初稿花了很大篇幅来介绍全世界学习汉语的热潮,因此造成文章的重心偏移,而成因的分析没有充分展开。

成稿:

Chinese fever has been spreading across the world. More than 30 million people in other countries have been learning Chinese up to now. Why has Chinese become so popular? We think that there are three reasons for it.

Firstly, China is a country with a long history, which has made the Chinese language richer and more attractive. Secondly, the Chinese economy has developed very quickly in recent years, so many overseas businessmen who want to enter the Chinese market need understand China and Chinese culture. Most importantly, China is becoming increasingly active in the U.N. and has become the focus of many other countries’ attention.

In a word, there is no doubt that the Chinese language will become more and more popular. 教师点评:

1. 本文时态运用正确。句型富于变化,复合句运用合理。

2. 结构清晰紧凑,特别是运用Firstly, Secondly, Most importantly 使原因分析层层递进,层次分明且重点突出,而不是平铺直叙,使文章有起伏感。

3. 文章行文严谨,前后照应,把握住了文章重点,成因分析很充分。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Chinese enjoys international popularity.

2. Chinese is very popular across the world.

3. China is a civilized country with a long history.

4. China’s economy has developed very quickly.

巩固练习:

某国际学校在一家英文报纸上刊登了一则广告,招聘一名高中英语教师,基本条件如下:

1. 年龄不超过40岁;

2. 有较好的中英文语言表达能力;

3. 热爱教育工作,善于与学生沟通;

4. 有两年教育经验者优先录取。

假如你是李华,28岁,毕业于北京大学,曾经在北京第三十六中学任教两年。你看了招聘广告后想求此职,请用英语写一封求职信,简要介绍一下自己。(词数:100左右)(参考范文见下期)

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Sir,

I have just read your advertisement in today’s English paper. I’ve learned that you are looking for a teacher. I’m writing to let you know that I am interested in getting the job. My name is Li Hua and I am 28 years old. I graduated from Beijing University and I can speak English well. I also worked as a teacher at No. 36 Middle School in Beijing for two years. Thus I have some

teaching experience. I really love to teach and I’d like to be a teacher at your school. I hope that you will consider me for the position. I’m looking forward to your reply.

Yours,

Li Hua

49. Leisure and Entertainment

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你和家人上周六去郊外野炊,请根据以下三幅图画写一封英语短文记叙此次郊游活动。

写作要求:

1. 合理发挥想像力,内容充实;2. 意思连贯、语言通顺、语法正确;3. 词数:120左右。 写作分析:

本次写作任务要求同学们根据给出的三幅图画记叙一次经历,属于开放式看图作文。看图作文没有固定的参考模式,可以根据图画提供的线索写一篇记叙文,也可以找出图画所暗示的主题写一篇议论文。这种看图发表议论的写作训练以后会陆续向大家介绍,现阶段的看图作文大都是写一篇记叙文。看图记叙文由于受图画的空间限制不可能将事件的所有细节全部表现出来,而只是提供主要的事件线索。而一篇完整丰满的记叙文又需要合理丰富的细节,这就要求同学们根据图片内容,合理地发挥想像力进行写作。要想写好开放式看图作文,同学们首先要明确文章主题,然后根据主题搭建文章结构,使文章主题明确、层次分明。

本次写作任务要求同学们根据图片内容,记叙全家人周末去郊外野炊的经历。同学们在写作过程中要紧紧抓住记叙文的"六要素":时间、地点、人物、事件、原因和结果。"六要素"需要同学们在图画中寻找,尤其是事件的过程。在出游前,全家人做了哪些准备?在野炊中,发生了什么事情?在野炊结束后,又发生了什么?同学们需要仔细观察图片,并合理发挥想像力,令文章内容完整丰富。通过观察图片,同学们能够注意到,三张图片中都出现了纸袋,纸袋在整个野炊过程中起到了什么作用呢?一家人又为什么要带着纸袋呢?这些都是同学们可以进行合理想像的部分。

文章的主题确定后,便可以开始搭建文章的结构了。针对本次看图作文,同学们需要合理分配每张图片内容在文章中的比例,切忌对每张图片都花费同样的笔墨进行叙述,这样只会令你的文章读起来详略不当、主次不分。第一张图片描绘了野炊前的准备工作,用简单一两句话带过即可。文章的重点应放在野炊的过程,即第二幅图片。最后一张图片描绘了野炊结束后全家人的举动,也是全文收尾的部分。在语言方面,同学们可以通过适当使用形容词、副词及从句令你的文章读起来生动、紧凑、连贯。

初稿:

Last Saturday my family had a picnic. I got up early in the morning. Mother took food and water with us for lunch, and then we left home. About one hour later, we arrived in the park. The weather was fine and warm. The sky was very clear and blue. There we saw beautiful flowers and green grass. Then we took out food and water and had our picnic. We put rubbish and empty bottles in paper bags we took along. After the picnic, we played interesting games. And we picked up rubbish on the grass and put them into our paper bags. We had a lot of fun last Saturday. How nice the picnic was!

教师点评:

初稿语句连贯,无语法错误。对整个野炊过程的叙述比较完整,但通篇读下来,给人感觉平淡。文章像是流水账,机械死板地记录了野炊的过程,缺少亮点。既然三幅图画中都出现了纸袋,可将这一物品作为野炊活动中的一个亮点加以叙述。此外,最后一段缺少点睛之笔,令野炊的意义黯然失色。总结一下,同学们在写记叙文,尤其是看图作文时,要挖掘图片内涵,这样才可以使你的文章读起来言之有物。

成稿:

Last Saturday, my family had a wonderful picnic in the city park. Mother prepared kinds of food and drink and some paper bags as well.

The weather was fine and the wind was gentle. We enjoyed the fresh air and the delicious food. After the picnic, Mom told us to put all of our rubbish in the paper bags she brought. My sister found there was rubbish on the grass, so we collected it and put it into the paper bags. Before leaving, we cleaned up all the rubbish and felt happy about what we had done.

We had a lot of fun last weekend, and I learnt that we should not throw rubbish on the ground. Everyone should do their best to protect the environment.

教师点评:

成稿文章内容丰富,覆盖了图片包含的所有要点,且重点突出;结构完整,谋篇布局合理。全文以"纸袋"为线索,记叙了出游前的准备过程,野炊经过,和野炊结束后的感想。而这些叙述全都服务于本文的主题, 保护环境。作者在最后一段以简单一两句话点明主题,全文读下来令人感觉浑然一体,言之有物。在语言方面,连词和短语的使用,使成稿连贯通顺,显示出小作者不俗的语言功底。

Powerful Sentences:

1. I am expected to leave for the cinema in two hours.

2. The meeting was to be held yesterday, but it was put off to next Monday.

3. As soon as we arrived in the park, we began flying a kite.

4. I felt so hot that I stopped the bicycles under the tree and went swimming.

5. Some people threw their rubbish on the grass, which polluted the environment.

巩固练习:

夏天即将来到,很多同学都将游泳作为一种休闲娱乐的方式。请写一篇文章记叙你的一次游泳经历,刊登在你班的英语板报上。

词数:120-150。

本期巩固练习参考范文

A Swimming Race

One day in last summer, I went swimming with my classmate Wang Hai, and we had a wonderful swimming race. We invited another boy in the swimming pool to be the judge. The winner would be rewarded with an ice cream as a prize. As the judge said "Start", I jumped into water immediately. I thought I would definitely be the winner, but I felt so tired after swimming only twenty meters. Wang Hai swam so fast that he caught up with me soon. In the end, he won the race. According to our deal, I bought him an ice cream, but both of us had a great time.

I want to have another swimming race with Wang Hai in the coming summer. This time I believe I will be the winner.

50. Life style

写作指导

▲写作任务:

学校上周组织同学们参观了一场"城市变迁"图片展览。通过图片你了解了许多关于城市的古老记忆,感触颇深。请你写一篇题为"Our Life of Today and Yesterday"的英语短文给校英语广播站投稿。词数: 120左右。

要求:

1. 结合实际,观察发生在你生活中的变化;

2.注意前后对比,突出变化的具体方面;

3. 观点明确、意思表达连贯、语言通顺。

▲写作分析:

1. 本次的写作任务是对比今昔生活的变化,属于说明文范畴。考查的写作技能是对比比较法(contrast&comparison)。使用这种写作手法时,文章旨在指出不同事物之间的相似性(similarities)或相似事物之间的差异性(differences)。根据命题要求,我们可以看出本次写作任务是对比今昔生活所发生的变化,即不同之处,因此用对比法。

比较和对比一般采用如下两种文章框架:1)对事物的异同之处逐点进行比较对照,分别罗列,使读者容易掌握两个事物之间的差别,表述模式为:A1,B1;A2,B2;A3,B3 ... ;2)对事物的异同之处以比较对象为单位进行比较对照,使读者对事物的整体特点一目了然,表述模式为:A1,A2,A3; B1, B2, B3 ... 。

2. 就本次写作任务而言,我们可以采用逐点比较,从生活、教育、旅游等方面进行对比。举出具体的事例来说明今昔生活的变化。在对比过程中,要注意使用表示比较对比类的连接词或短语来衔接上下文,使行文流畅。如, while, whereas, unlike, compared with, different from等。在完成逐点的比较后,还需要对全文做一个总结,这样可以在内容上和开头相互呼应,使文章结构完整。

▲初稿:

Great changes have taken place in our daily lives over the past thirty years. Now take my hometown for example. The living condition is getting better and better. Our house was small and simple in the past, but now we’re living in a better-conditioned house with new-fashioned furniture, which makes our life extremely convenient. Very few students went to university in the past, while now more and more students have the chances to attend college. And even many students choose to study abroad. Moreover, we used to wear simple dresses, but now we dress much more beautiful and fashionable. Besides,more and more people travel abroad. In a word, our life has great changes in many aspects.

▲教师点评:

文章按照逐点对照法进行了对比,举出了生活水平、教育普及程度、出国旅游等方面的具体内容来展开对比,时态、语态的灵活变化突出了这种对比所呈现的时空转换。但是文章结构还显混乱,段落层次不清晰;另外,文章中用词过于简单,句式单一,使整个文章结构松散。具体的问题表现在以下方面:

1. 结构松散,层次混乱。原文虽然内容完整,但是没有条理。如文章前面写到The living condition is getting better and better,但后面又出现了衣着。因此,建议将主体段落分成三部分,把住房和穿着归为生活条件,然后再写教育和旅游,这样可以使文章更有条理、更清晰。

2. 用词不规范,句式单一。该文中house一词的使用极不规范,应该用更具体的room或

apartment替换。此外,整篇文章基本上是简单句的堆砌,句式缺乏变化。所以应注意选词的准确性以及句式的多样性。

▲成稿:

In the last thirty years, our country has developed very quickly. Great changes have taken place in our daily lives and we all witness them in different ways. In the past, several generations lived in a crowded simple room, but now most people have moved into modern apartments with convenient furniture and domestic appliances. In regards to higher education, colleges have opened their doors to more and more students than ever before. Increasingly, students want to study abroad, which contrasts sharply with the past. Compared to the past, there are many international companies and services that make our travel more convenient and more colorful than before.

To sum up, our lifestyles have changed a lot and become more and more comfortable. I hope it keeps changing for the better.

▲教师点评:

成稿注重措词的精确性和句式的多样性,使文章内容丰富,整体结构更加紧凑,如

Increasingly, students want to study abroad, which contrasts sharply with the past.;同时,一些连接词如what’s more, compared to等的使用使文章行文流畅,思路清晰;此外,篇章结构更加完善。通过第一段引出本文的话题,即great changes,第二段开始展开对great changes的具体阐述,第三段进行总结,呼应开头, 最后还表达了自己美好的愿望。

▲Powerful Sentences:

1. People were ... , while now ...

2. People were not aware of ... in the past, but now they are ...

3. There’s a remarkable difference in ...

4. The following items show how they differ.

▲巩固练习:

假如你的美国笔友Rose下个月要来中国学习生活,由于她不是很了解中国的生活习惯,因此写信向你询问。请你给她写一封回信,向她介绍我国与美国在生活习惯方面的不同之处。

要求:词数120左右。开头已为你写好,不计入总数。

Dear Rose,

I’m very happy to hear that you will come to study in Beijing next month.____________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________

Yours sincerely,

Tom

本期巩固练习参考范文

Dear Rose,

I’m very happy to hear that you will come to study in Beijing next month. Although there are many differences in the way Chinese and Americans live, I believe you will get used to and enjoy your new home quickly.

The Chinese have very special eating habits. Although Western people use forks and knives at every meal, we prefer chopsticks. There are obvious differences between an American and Chinese diet, and this is due to locally produced foods.

In our everyday lives there are also some distinct differences. Chinese see Americans as open-minded and a little too frank at times, while Chinese like to think of themselves as conservative and shy. We don’t often express our love openly in public, but friends do things to

show they care.

I believe you will see a very different way of life while in China. Most of these differences are due to cultural and historical differences. Yours sincerely, Evelyn

51. Media

写作任务:

网络在我们的工作、学习和生活中发挥着越来越重要的作用。请根据下面的提示,写一篇120词左右的英语短文,介绍网络的作用,题目是"The Internet"。

1. 我们可以借助网络了解国内外时事或搜寻其他信息。

2. 网络已经成为我们和外界交流沟通的主要方式之一。

3. 网络可以使我们放松身心。

4. 如果沉湎于网络,会极大地影响工作、学习和健康。

写作分析:

1. 这是一篇介绍Internet在现代社会中所起的作用的文章,宜用现在时态。写作时应注意条理清晰,言简意赅。

2. 行文时应适当加上一些过渡句,使短文既覆盖所有要点,又符合篇章结构要求。 初稿:

The Internet

The Internet plays a more and more important role in our lives.

Through the Internet, we can get the latest news at home and abroad without going out. We can also get all kinds of information that we want. In addition, we can chat, send e-mails and write blogs on the Internet so that we can communicate with people all over the world. What’s more, we can watch films or listen to music to relax ourselves after hard work.

However, many of us spend too much time on the Internet. In fact, it has a very bad effect on our work, study and health.

教师点评:

短文覆盖了所有的要点,并且层次清楚,时态运用正确。但也有一些不足之处:

1. 句型单一,缺少变化。很多句子都是We may / can ...的简单句型。

2. 文章结尾显得突然,缺少前后照应。

3. 没能对所要求的要点做适当地发挥,因此词数略显少,文章显得太单薄。

成稿:

The Internet

Recently, the Internet has been playing a more and more important role in our lives. As the old Chinese saying goes, "A man can know what happened in the world just by reading at home." Now, each of us is able to achieve this goal with the help of the Internet. The Internet provides users with news at home and abroad and it also offers all kinds of other information. Furthermore, it has become a popular method of communicating with others through using chat rooms, sending e-mails and writing blogs. And after hard work, we can relax ourselves by watching films or listening to music on the Internet.

However, spending too much time on the Internet can ruin our work and study habits as well as our health. So we should set a time limit on our surfing.

教师点评:

1. 本文既依据要点,又不拘泥于要点,适当地增加了过渡句,使文章前后照应,行文流畅。

2. 文章用了中国的一句谚语来引出下文,使文章增色不少。

3. 作者运用了多种形式表达"通过……方式"。如:with the help of the Internet / by watching films ...

Powerful Expressions:

(常见谚语)

All roads lead to Rome. 条条大路通罗马。

Rome was not built in a day. 冰冻三尺,非一日之寒。

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. 双鸟在林不如一鸟在手。

Kill two birds with one stone.一箭双雕。

Don’t put off till tomorrow what should be done today.今日事,今日毕。

Practice makes perfect. 熟能生巧。

God helps those who help themselves.自助者天助。

It is never too late to learn.活到老,学到老。

Many hands make light work.众人拾柴火焰高。

No pain, no gain.不劳无获。

Nothing is difficult to the man who tries.世上无难事,只怕有心人。

(通过……的方式)

By using the Internet, we can achieve this goal.

With his brother’s help, he managed to finish the task on time.

We will relax ourselves by listening to music.

巩固练习:

手机除了可以用来和别人通话和发短信外,它还具有很多其他的功能。假如你是某中学的学生,请根据下面提示,写一篇120词左右的英语短文,向你的外国朋友描述一下你理想中的手机。

功能:

听音乐、看电视、看电影、阅读、拍照、上网等

本期写作指导参考范文

Cellphones

There are many kinds of cellphones on the market. Which one do you like best? Allow me to tell you what I think makes a good cellphone. I think cellphones, as high-tech machines, should be able to be used in many ways apart from simply calling and sending text messages. It should be easy for me to watch TV and surf the Internet with them. In this way, I could also read the latest news at home and abroad. What’s more, I want to read e-books on my cellphone at any time and in any place. I also want to be able to store music and films on my cellphone so that I can relax in my spare time. I also think it would be wonderful if cellphones could be used as cameras too. Then I could record all of the important moments in my life.

52. Money

写作指导

■写作任务:

电视台的青少年频道做了一期主题为"Use Gift Money Wisely"的英语访谈节目。假如你是受邀嘉宾, 请写一篇文章,谈谈你对压岁钱的看法。内容要点:

1.说明压岁钱的意义;

2.孩子们使用压岁钱的现状;

3.提出合理使用压岁钱的建议。写作要求:

1. 观点清晰、内容充实;

2. 语言通顺、语法正确;

3. 词数:120左右。参考词汇:压岁钱gift money

■写作分析:

本次写作任务要求针对某一现象发表自己的观点,属议论文。议论文是以议论为主要表达方式,通过摆事实、讲道理,直接表达作者观点或主张的一种文体。本次的写作话题围绕同学们十分熟悉的压岁钱展开。因此,同学们在写作过程中可以结合自己的亲身经历和所见所闻,重点议论应如何合理地使用压岁钱。

在写作过程中,同学们应根据内容要点,围绕话题展开文章。首先用一两句话叙述压岁钱的意义,即什么是压岁钱?压岁钱是用来做什么的?比如,压岁钱是中国人用来庆祝春节的一种传统风俗,它寄托了长辈对晚辈的关爱和期许。然后通过列举实例描述孩子们使用压岁钱的现状,如购买玩具、衣服或CD等。但要明确一点,对压岁钱使用现状的叙述是为接下来提出合理建议做铺垫,所以不应花费过多笔墨。接下来,同学们可以通过评价、对比压岁钱的使用现状过渡到提建议部分。这是本篇议论文的重点。同学们可以结合青少年的心理特点和个人实际情况提出一些好的消费建议,令压岁钱的使用更加合理和有意义,如资助贫困地区的学生、植树美化环境等。

语言表达方面同学们要注意议论文的语言特点,做到夹叙夹议。遣词用句要客观、公正,充分表达自己的观点,切记不可过于偏激。可以适当地选用形容词和副词来丰富语言,使文章读起来更加优美生动。

■初稿:

Gift Money

Giving gift money is a traditional custom in China during the Spring Festival. The older generations give money to the younger generations to express their love and hope to them. In recent years children have been given more and more gift money. The amount has increased from 10 yuanto 1,000 yuan, or even more. So how to spend the gift money has become a problem for both the children and their parents. Some parents let their children buy anything they like, but some parents are really worried about that. They try to find some ways to educate their children on the value of money and teach them how to spend their money more meaningfully. I think that every student should learn how to use their gift money and make them more useful.

■教师点评:

初稿的第一段介绍了什么是压岁钱及压岁钱的意义。第二段对比了家长对待孩子使用压岁钱的不同态度。第三段总结了自己的观点:应合理使用压岁钱。整篇文章结构清晰、通顺流畅,没有语法错误,但还是存在一些明显的不足。

初稿没有按照题目要求完成写作。内容要点中要求同学们写出"孩子们使用压岁钱的现状",但初稿的第二段只是对比了家长对待孩子使用压岁钱的不同态度,没有具体讲孩子们是如何花这些钱的。内容要点中还要求同学们"提出合理使用压岁钱的建议",这个内容也没有体现在初稿的第三段中。因此,虽然初稿的语言和结构没有问题,但是内容不符合写作要求。 此外,初稿中的个别语句较复杂,如"They try to ... more meaningfully."这一句话中出现了较多的不定式结构,读起来冗长且费解。

■成稿:

Gift Money

During the Chinese Spring Festival, the older generations usually give gift money to the

younger generations to express their love and hope.

In recent years children have been given more and more gift money. Some children spent them on pop music CDs, expensive clothes and whatever else they like. But some children used it to buy study materials. In my opinion, children should use their gift money wisely. For example, we can donate it to poor children who can’t afford their school fees. In addition, parents should guide their children in the usage of their money. For me, spending the gift money on education is much more meaningful than on entertainment.

■教师点评:

成稿相对于初稿而言,内容完整、结构合理、自然流畅。首先在内容上,成稿依照内容要点,在第二段中对比了孩子使用压岁钱的现状,并在第三段里提出了自己的建议。其次在结构方面,从第一段引出话题,到对比使用现状,再到最后的提建议,清晰合理、一目了然。另外,成稿的语言自然流畅。通过"in recent years", "in addition", "for exam-ple"这些短语的使用,令上下文衔接自然。最后,成稿做到了夹叙夹议,通过列举事实,如"Some children spent them on pop music CDs ..."使文章论据充分、合情合理。

■Powerful Sentences:

1. I think that we should ... to make full use of ...2. Nowadays / Recently, ... has become a much bigger problem for children. 3. In my opinion / I think / For me, ... is much more important than ..., because ...4. With the development of ..., ... has increased so rapidly that ...5. It is (not) useful / meaningful / to ... so we should ...

■巩固练习:

你市将举办青少年英语作文竞赛,主题为"Time Is Money"。假如你被学校选中参加此届竞赛,请写一篇参赛作文表达自己的观点。词数:120左右。

本期参考范文

There is a well-known saying: time is money. But in my opinion, time is even more valuable than money, as money can be earned back, but time will never return when it has gone.

As a student, we should make full use of our time by studying and building our bodies for the coming future. Seize every minute and make every effort to learn knowledge and professional skills. It is meaningless to spend all our time watching TV and playing computer games.

In addition, we should form a good habit of saving time. Don't put off what can be done today to tomorrow. Laziness will not only bring us failure but it will also lead us to poverty.

53. Movies and Dramas

写作指导

写作任务:

你校英语俱乐部将放映电影《马达加斯加2》。假如你是此次活动的组织者,请根据下面表格中的提示信息,制作一张英文海报介绍这部电影,并邀请全校同学参加此次活动。 写作要求:1. 内容完整、主题突出;2. 连贯通顺、无语法错误;3. 词数:100-120。

英语写作指导及范文

写作分析:

本次写作任务要求制作一张电影海报,属应用文体裁。在平时的写作训练中,针对海报的练习较少,因此首先要明确海报的定义。海报是一种向公众介绍和发布有关电影、电视、戏剧、体育比赛、报告会、展览会等消息的宣传广告,有时配以绘画图案。海报一般张贴在公共场所,重要的海报也可刊登在报刊、电台广播或电视上。海报内容上方一般有"Poster"之类的标题。正文一般介绍活动的具体内容、举办时间、场所、方法以及注意事项,最后写明举办单位的名称和制作海报的日期。海报的内容须真实准确,语言生动,以吸引人们前来参加海报上宣传的活动。为便于阅读,海报的篇幅要尽量短小。可根据海报内容配以适当的插图,以增强海报的感染力。一般来说,海报都具有鲜明的目的性,都注重宣传效果,文字都力求准确、简明。 针对本次写作任务,同学们在审题后便可得知,这张海报的主要目的是宣传和通知,内容应包括两个部分。第一部分交代活动的时间、地点、影片名和活动组织者等基本情况,应包括几下几个要素。What’s the name of the film? When and where will the film be shown? How much are the tickets?等。接下来介绍电影的内容,应包括以下几个要素,What’s the film about? What stars are in the film? Why should people watch the film? 等。题目中给出的中文表格内容较细致,但同学们在写作中应注意,不要逐字翻译,可以通过连词、形容词和副词的使用,令你的海报读起来连贯生动。

初稿:

Welcome to watch the film Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa.In this film, Alex the Lion, Marty the Zebra, Melman the Giraffe and Gloria the Hippo, start to leave Madagascar. All of a sudden, they land in the wilderness of Africa. They four have troubles communicating with them after spending so much time at the Central Park Zoo. The movie will be shown in the school hall on June 15th at 4p.m.

Acted by Ben Stiller, David Schwimmer and Chris Rock, Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa is directed by Eric Darnell and Tom McGrath. All the audience are welcome!

教师点评:

初稿内容完整,语句通顺,基本完成了写作任务的要求,但在文章结构方面仍有需要改进的地方。文章第一部分应对此次放映活动做基本情况介绍,但初稿文章将放映活动的时间、地点和组织单位等情况放在了第二段结尾处进行介绍,让读者对海报的目的不甚明了,因此对剧

情的介绍也失去了宣传的目的,这样的内容安排有欠妥当。另外在语言方面,对于电影剧情的简介可以更加简练,不妨运用从句结构,可令文章读起来更显紧凑生动。

成稿:

The English Club will show the movie Madagascar:Escape2Africain the school hall on June 15th at 4p.m. for free. Those who are interested in English cartoon movies are welcome.

The movie tells the story how Alex, Marty, Gloria and Melman try to leave Madagascar. They land in the wildness of Africa by accident, where they don’t know how to live with other wild animals. Will they be able to come back to the Central Park Zoo? It is directed by Eric Darnell and Tom McGrath and acted by Ben Stiller, David Schwimmer, Chris Rock and Jada Pinkett Smith.

If you are interested in the wonderful movie, come and join us. You will have a great time! 教师点评:

经过修改后的成稿,覆盖了题目要求的时间、地点等所有要点,结构完整,层次清楚,符合海报的写作要求和特点。语言生动有感染力,尤其是对于电影内容的概括,原汁原味并言简意赅,从句"They land in the wildness of Africa by accident, where they don’t know how to live with other wild animals."的运用,显示出成稿作者较好的语言功底。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Organized by the Students’Union of our school, a football match will be held between our team and the team of No. 15 High School on Saturday at 5:00 p. m..

2. All the goods on show are sold at twenty percent discount. Please examine and choose carefully before you pay.

3. Based on the best-selling novel, the movie tells a story of ....

4. Hosted by the Students’Union, the second English Speech Contest will be held in the classroom No. 410 at 7:00 p.m., Thursday.

5. In celebration of the 60th anniversary of the founding of the People’s Republic of China, this magazine has decided to publish a special issue for high school students with the title I love My Motherland

巩固练习:

假如你校英语角最近排演的英语话剧《威尼斯商人》将在本周五晚7:30在学生中心演出。请你制作一张英语海报介绍此次演出,并邀请师生前来观看。

词数:100-120。

参考词汇:《威尼斯商人》The Merchant of Venice

本期巩固练习参考范文

Organized by the English Corner, the play "The Merchant of Venice" will be shown in the Students’Centre on Friday evening at 7: 30 p.m.. All the teachers and students are welcomed. Based on William Shakespeare’s scripts, the play is a famous comedy.

It tells the story of how the kind merchant, Antonio, wisely helps his friend to pay back some money. The three main characters in the play are acted by the members of English Corner, Li Xiang, Zhang Wei and Chen Fang. Our music teacher and language teacher are the directors of the play. What’s even more special is that all the costumes in the play are made by the actors themselves.

If you are interested, please come to Classroom 101 for free tickets.

54. Music

写作任务:

一家英文报社在中学生中开展了"What kind of music do you like best?"的调查,请你给报社写一封信谈谈你和你同学的观点。开头已为你写好,不计入字数。(词数:120左右) Dear Editor,

All of our classmates are interested in your survey "What kind of music do you like best?"We had a heated discussion.

_______________________________________________________

写作分析:

1. 这是一篇开放式作文,要确定文体、时态和写作要点。要用恰当的词语明确地表达自己和他人的观点。

2. 表达观点的文章属于议论文。因此,这篇短文以一般现在时为主。

3. 确定写作要点是本次写作任务的难点。要先介绍你同学们的观点,然后说说你自己的看法,最后做一个小结。

初稿:

Dear Editor,

All of our classmates are interested in your survey "What kind of music do you like best?" We had a heated discussion. Music is an important part of our life. Most students like pop music. Some like rock & roll, R&B and disco, and others like hip-hop. They like hip-hop best because they can dance to it. They believe that most young people are fond of hip-hop. And, they say that they love Jay Chou and his hip-hop. Some students like classical music. They think classical music is more beautiful than pop music, and many classical works are good cultural treasures of human beings. In a word, we have quite different opinions. I love all kinds of music as long as they are beautiful, encouraging and relaxing. As we know, music is important and it plays an important part in our life.

教师点评:

1、文章基本完成了写作任务,表述了一些中学生在音乐方面喜好的信息及其原因。

2、但信息的描述有些模糊不清,主要是因为:缺乏恰当的过渡词,文章显得散乱,没有层次。比如:在Some students like classical music.前缺少一个转折连词。

3、用词重复,句式单一,缺少变化。比如:多次使用think表示看法。"They like / love music."是本文用来表达喜欢音乐的唯一句型。

成稿:

Dear Editor,

All of our classmates were interested in your survey "What kind of music do you like best?" We had a heated discussion and found out we have different opinions. Most students like pop music, such as rock& roll, R&B, disco, jazz and hip-hop. Some have a deep love for hip-hop. They think that hip-hop can touch young people’s hearts. They say their favorite hip-hop singer is Jay Chou. However, a few students are fond of classical music. In their opinion, classical music is more beautiful than pop music, and many classical works are precious cultural treasures. Personally speaking, I love all kinds of music that are beautiful, graceful, encouraging, touching and relaxing. As we all know, music is a part of our life. Music makes our world colorful.

教师点评:

1. 本文结构严密,是典型的"三段式"结构:第一段引出文章内容;第二段详细介绍同学们的观点;第三段概括总结。层次清楚、连贯,清楚地说出了当代中学生对音乐的想法。

2. 运用了恰当的过渡词和过渡句,段落之间、层次之间衔接自然流畅。如:however / personally speaking等。

3. 作者所用词汇和句型较丰富。例如:在表达观点时,用了不同的句式:They think ... / They say ...等等。

Powerful Patterns:

(表述自己或别人的观点)I think ...I believe ...I hold the view that ...I’m sure ...In my opinion, ...Personally speaking, ...Some people think / believe / hold that ...

巩固练习:

假如你作为班长,星期五在你们班英语口语课上组织了一次讨论,讨论围绕"Where do you get your music? Why?"展开。请你对这次讨论的结果写一篇总结交给英语老师。(词数:120左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

Our class had a heated discussion on Friday about the topic "Where do you get your music? Why?".

We have many ways of getting music. First of all, we usually get music from the Internet —listening online or downloading songs to an MP3 player or other musical equipment. This way is the most popular, because it is free of charge as well as easy to manage. Music on the Internet is quickly renewed, so you can listen to the latest music. Another way of getting music is also popular —buying music CDs or DVDs. Although they cost a lot, some students have the hobby of collecting them. Of course, we have other ways to get music too, like listening to music by radio, and attending a live concert. In a word, life offers us different ways of getting music.

55. Neighborhood

写作指导

●写作任务:

有这样一个故事:

两家人隔墙而居,都以种植玫瑰为生,为此他们之间还发生过激烈的竞争。后来二战爆发,其中一家人被德国人抓走,临行前请邻居代为打理生意。二战后,被抓的一家人刚回到家,邻居的儿子便拿着厚厚的账本来交代生意。原来其父已去世,但他嘱咐儿子一定要把邻居的玫瑰园打理好。他们不负重托,把玫瑰园打理得非常好,规模也扩大了一倍。

假如你是李华,请你给你的美国笔友Bob写一封信来讲述这个故事,并谈谈你对于邻里之间应该如何相处的想法。(词数:120左右)

●写作分析:

1. 根据写作要求,本次任务是写一篇针对某件事情阐述自己想法的文章,因此,文章应该包含两个部分:故事的内容以及由此产生的想法。要求叙述与议论相结合。

2. 叙述故事时,注意要简练,不必描述过细。

3. 写自己的想法时,如果内容过多,可考虑分层来叙述,以便使文章脉络更清晰。常见表示顺序的副词有:firstly , secondly , lastly , finally等。阐述自己的观点时,可以用in my opinion, I think ... 等表达法。

●初稿:

Dear Bob,

Recently I read a story which happened around the Second World War. There were two families who were neighbors with each other. They both grew roses for sale. Unfortunately, one family were taken away by the Germans and asked the neighbor to take charge of his rose business. After the war, the family were set free. They were delighted to find their rose business well managed and had grown even twice bigger than before. I was moved by this story. We often hear people complaining about their neighbors. In my opinion, if we can be friendly, open-hearted and helpful to our neighbors, I am sure that we can get on very well with our neighbors and we can live a very happy life.

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

本篇写作条理比较清晰,记叙和议论相结合,基本上达到了写作的目的。并且根据叙述故事的需要还补充了一些内容,如Unfortunately ... / ... they were delighted to find ... / I was moved by this story.

而不足之处在于叙述故事时没能提炼出重要信息,有些拖沓,造成"叙"重于"议"的格局,影响到文章的总体结构,作者应在组织故事结构上再多下些功夫,做到言简意赅。

●成稿:

Dear Bob,

Let me share with you a moving story. Two neighboring families grew roses to sell. Then World War II broke out. One family was unluckily taken away by the Germans. The other family promised to help manage their rose business. After the war, the family returned and was surprised to find that their rose garden was well managed, and even twice as big as before.

This story serves as a good example for the people who are always complaining about their neighbors. Getting along with your neighbors can be very easy in my opinion. All you need to do is be sincere, friendly, considerate and supportive. It can make the relationship between you and your neighbors much better. Remember the old saying, "A good neighbor is better than a ralative who is far away."

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

1. 内容的适当补充使这封信更加充实,上下文衔接更加紧凑。

2. 在遣词造句方面更加精炼,且优美准确,如This story serves as a good example for ...

3. 结尾处引用了一句谚语,起到画龙点睛的作用。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. Nowadays many people feel lonely, but strangely they do not like to visit their neighbors to have a chat.

2. You may wonder how we can get along well with our neighbors. Let me give you some tips.

3. This short story left a strong impression on me.

4. A friend in need is a friend indeed.

5. A good turn deserves another.

●巩固练习:

请仔细看下面四幅图画,并根据图画内容写一篇发生在邻里之间的小事投给一家英文社区网站。(词数:110左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

It was a cold day and my parents were to go to Beijing for business. I saw them off at the train station and then I went back home. To my surprise, I could not find my keys. Where were they? Suddenly I realized that I had left my keys in my bedroom. "What should I do?" I said to myself. I just stood by the door with a helpless look. Just then, my neighbor came out of his house and asked me what the matter was. I told him about my problem and he invited me to his house and asked me to make myself at home. That evening I had a big dinner with his family. I am very thankful to my dear neighbor!

56. Novels

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你是李华,你的网友Bob正在为给表妹准备什么生日礼物而发愁,写信向你征求意见。请你给Bob写封回信,建议他买一本儿童小说。在信中简单介绍此书的内容和你推荐的原因。(词数:100左右)

可参考以下表格所提供的信息:

书名《爱丽丝漫游仙境》(Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland)

作者(英)刘易斯·卡洛尔(Lewis Carroll)

内容简介一个名叫爱丽丝的女孩,不小心掉进兔子洞后,发生了一系列奇妙的故事。 推荐原因

*好像睡前妈妈讲的故事。

*其中的故事几乎全部由儿童的想象世界组成。

*本书对激发和培养想像力有帮助。

*一个多世纪以来,它陪伴无数人度过了欢乐的童年时光。

●任务分析:

这篇文章是给你的朋友回一封信提出建议,因此应该注意写信的语气,及开头结尾的措辞。文章的主体部分其实是对一部小说的简单介绍,所以文章的时态应以一般现在时为主。

简单介绍小说的基本信息后,重点应放在阐述推荐的原因上。注意对所给出的参考内容要恰当地排序、增加或删减,使行文更流畅。在文章的结尾,要注意对所提出的建议进行总结。 ●初稿:

Dear Bob,

I’m very pleased to receive your letter. It’s my pleasure to give you a suggestion. My suggestion is a children’s book, such as the novel, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. It was written by an English writer, Lewis Carroll. It tells the story of a girl named Alice who falls down into a rabbit hole. It brings her wonderful experiences. All the stories in the book seem as if they are stories that your mother tells you before sleeping. All these stories come from children’s imaginary world. A great number of children consider this novel as their friend in their life. Reading the novel will help children to develop their imagination. It is a wonderful book.

So you’d better buy one for your cousin as a gift. I think she is sure to like it.

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

初稿注意了书信的写作格式、段落及段落之间的衔接,基本上把建议的内容写清楚了。但是仍存在以下三方面的问题:

1. 信的开头有些啰嗦,寒暄过多。

2. 信的结尾had better用得不恰当,显得语气非常生硬。

3. 文章的第二部分,只是把写作任务中的参考表格的原因硬生生地"晾"在那里,因而给人以凌乱之感,缺乏文章所应具备的连贯性。

●成稿:

Dear Bob,

Let me give you a suggestion about what kind of gift to give to your cousin. A good choice would be a children’s novel, such as Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. It was written by an English writer, Lewis Carroll. It tells the story of a girl named Alice who falls down into a rabbit hole and has many interesting experiences. The novel is made up of many imaginary stories that seem to come from a child’s mind. All of the stories are very interesting. They seem as if they are tales that your mother tells you before going to sleep. Since the novel was published, it has been very popular with adults as well as children. It helps to develop the readers’ imagination.

In a word, this is a novel worth reading for children. I think your cousin will like it, too.

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

首先,成稿的开头,开门见山,简明扼要。既注意了信件的措辞礼貌,又直奔主题。

其次,第二段的写作非常精彩。作者将推荐的原因巧妙地进行了整合,每句话之间的衔接自然紧凑,且具有很清晰的逻辑关系。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. More and more people like to read modern novels in English.

2. Good novels are like a bright, warm light on a cold day.

3. His books were translated into many languages and well received by readers.

4. He and his works are deeply loved by readers throughout the world.

5. He makes a living by writing, and his poems, short stories and novels have won many prizes.

●巩固练习:

假如你们班要办一期英语角,主题是"我最喜欢的英文作品"。请你根据以下表格所提供的信息,介绍一下马克·吐温的《哈克贝利·芬历险记》。(词数:100左右)

书名《哈克贝利·芬历险记》(The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn)

作者(美)马克·吐温(Mark Twain)

内容简介

哈克贝利·芬是个孤儿,无人管束,但心地善良。他帮助黑奴Jim逃亡,一路上遭遇了许多艰难险阻,但最终取得了胜利。评价深受全世界青少年读者的喜爱。有人称:“全部现代美国文学起源于马克·吐温的一本名叫《哈克贝利·芬历险记》的书。”

本期写作指导参考范文

My favorite English novel is The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by the American writer Mark Twain. This novel tells the story of Huckleberry, a boy who lost his parents when he was very young. Nobody took care of him, but he was very kind and always ready to help others. One great thing he did was that he helped the black slave Jim escape. They met various people and many difficulties on their way, but in the end they made it. The novel is very popular with

teenagers throughout the world because it is a very interesting adventure. Furthermore, it is recognized as the first work of modern American literature.

57. Novels and Stories

写作指导

■写作任务:

假如你是李华,你校英语俱乐部正在开展读外国名著的活动,请你写一篇读书报告介绍一本外国名著。写作要点:1. 介绍名著的基本情况;2. 叙述名著的内容;3. 简单说明你的读后感。词数:120左右。

■写作分析:

本次写作任务要求写一篇读书报告,是区别于记叙文、说明文和议论文的一种独立的文体。读书报告是读完一本书后的总结和心得,一般来说,一篇读书报告包括以下几部分:作者介绍、内容概要和读后感。如果没有篇幅限制,还可以介绍此书的独特之处或你读后最喜欢的部分。因为文章的写作目的旨在向大家推荐一本书,因此在写读书报告时,对书本身内容的介绍应是写作的重点,这部分一定要保证叙述的客观性,不要加入自己的评论。读后感应另起一段,和读者交流自己的感想或对书进行评价。

本次写作任务已经给出了读书报告的几个写作要点,同学们可以根据这样的框架进行写作。文章第一部分介绍该名著的基本情况,即该书的作者是谁?写作背景是怎样的?书的主题是什么?若有需要,可以对该作者进行简单介绍,但这部分并非报告的重点,一两句话即可。第二部分叙述名著的内容。由于是读书报告,因此叙述名著内容要求同学们具备较强的语言概括能力,用精炼生动的语言概括整个名著的精华内容。在概括时,同学们可以参考记叙文的写作方法,将名著中故事的六要素,即时间、地点、人物、起因、经过和结果交待清楚,让读者能够对名著内容有大致的了解。在语言表达上,应根据故事内容采用一般现在时或一般过去时。最后,简单说明你的读后感。在这一部分中,同学们既可以向读者推荐这本名著,也可以谈谈自己在读后有怎样的感受,比如对你有什么启发或让你有什么收获等。

■初稿:

Among all the books I have read, I like Oliver Twist best. This novel is written by Charles Dickens. He wrote this novel to reveal the darkness of the society in London. Oliver lived in a town and he didn’t have parents. His life was very poor. Then he escaped from the town and ran away to London. There he fell into the hands of a group of thieves. He was taught the skill of stealing. Oliver had suffered so much pain. At last, Oliver was adopted by a kind man. The thieves received what they should get. I like this novel because it shows the darkness of the society in Britain in the 19th century. And I learn the truth of life from the story.

■教师点评:

初稿文章框架结构比较清晰,基本涵盖了三个写作要点,但在内容安排和语言上仍有需要改进的地方。在内容安排上,首段对名著的基本情况交代不够细致,作家的国籍、生活年代以及名著所反映的时代背景都没有交代,没有做好推荐名著的信息准备。名著的写作背景放在末段显然不妥,应将这一信息置于首段。另外,第一段中"... to reveal the darkness of the society in London."与第三段的"... it shows the darkness of the society ..."重复,应在成稿中加以改正。在语言方面,初稿语言单调,缺乏变化。第一段介绍名著基本概况时可以使用定语从句衔接句子。第二部分对于小说内容的叙述整段使用单句,没有句式方面的变化。并且都是以He或Oliver作主语,表达较为累赘,信息之间的关联性不强,应适当变化句式结构、丰富表达形式。 ■成稿:

Of all the books I’ve read, I like Oliver Twist best, which is written by British writer Charles Dickens and reveals the darkness of London society during the 19th century. In the novel, Oliver Twist was an orphan born in a town not far from London. He was very poor, and when he escaped to London, he fell into the hands of a group of thieves. They forced him to steal. Oliver had suffered so much pain before being adopted by a kind man. In the end the thieves got the punishment they deserved. After reading the novel I am really moved by Oliver Twist’s kindness. The novel has taught me that the kindness will defeat evil.

■教师点评:

经过修改后的成稿内容完整、思路清晰、语言简练。作者通过使用定语从句,令文章紧凑、生动,如"... I like OliverTwistbest, which is written by English writer Charles Dickens ..."。另外在内容方面,第一段对于名著基本情况的概述更加具体。第二段叙述小说内容时语言连贯通顺、一气呵成。最后一部分作者清楚地说明了自己读完小说后的感受,是一篇不错的读书报告。 ■Powerful Sentences:

1. The book is a collection of short stories by British writer ...

2. The book, written by ..., is not only popular in the writer’s home country, but all over the world.

3. From the book we learn that the poor in Britain during the 19th century lived terrible lives.

4. I recommend you read the book, because you will learn ... from it.

■巩固练习:

假如你是王明。你在学校图书馆里阅读了一本童话故事,请你写一封信给你的外国笔友Rose,向她介绍并推荐这本书。词数:100左右。

Dear Rose,

Recently, I have read a fairy tale and I’d like to share the book with you.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________What do you think of the book? Look forward to your letter.

Yours,

Wang Ming

本期巩固练习参考范文

Dear Rose,

Recently I have read a fairy tale and I’d like to share the book with you.

The title of the tale is The Little Prince, and it was written by French pilot Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. The prince comes from a small planet. He falls in love with a flower, but he is too young to know how to love the flower. He leaves the planet and travels to other planets, meeting various people and learning what love is.

The book was originally written for children, but many adults are attracted to it because of its charm and depth. I love the story, and have learnt a lot about love and responsibility from it.

What do you think of the book? Look forward to your letter.

Yours,

Wang Ming

58. Old and New

写作指导

写作任务:

高中第一年很快就要结束了。相信在这一年里你的生活肯定发生了不小的变化。请以"Old and New"为题写一篇英语短文谈谈这一年里你的变化,在口语课上与同学们进行交流。 写作要求:

1. 内容充实,主题突出;2. 连贯通顺,无语法错误;3. 词数:120-150。

写作分析:

本次写作要求就高中生活一年来的变化和感受进行总结和描述,属于记叙文体裁。一年里的变化涵盖面较广,乍看之下,给人以不知从何下笔之感。此时,同学们可以想想生活中的变化都包括哪些方面?校园学习生活、与朋友的交往、丰富的课余生活、或是身体和思想方面的成长,这些都可以作为写作的素材。但同时需要注意的是,题目是"Old and New",同学们还需在文章中体现出这一年的新旧变化。比如学会了一种新的学习方法,令你的成绩有所提高;结交了新的朋友;又或者培养了一种新的兴趣爱好。同学们可以根据自己的亲身体验,选取其中的一两点进行写作,记叙发生在自己身上的变化,但切忌平铺直叙,缺少重点,应紧紧抓住自己印象最深刻,或自己感触最深的变化具体叙述。

分析了文章主题后,就可以开始构建文章结构了。首先在文章的第一部分,用一两句话简要概括这一年变化的大的方面,合理自然地引出下文。然后在第二段具体记叙这些变化。它们是如何产生的?新旧变化的具体体现是什么?可以通过使用while, unlike, compared to, in contrast to, be different from, be similar to等表示对比、比较的连词和短语来体现这种新旧变化。最后可以说明你对这一年来学习生活的感想;这些变化对你造成了怎样的影响;或是你从中都有什么样的收获或心得。在写作过程中,除了注意上下文的衔接,还应注意句式的变化和词语的选择,尽量使自己的文章读起来生动流畅、连贯自然。

初稿:

Great changes have taken place during my first year in senior school. With the help of my teachers, I became more interested in my school studies than before. I feel more pleased because I made progress, especially in English and Maths. I was praised many times by my teachers and my parents. I was getting along well with my friends and classmates. I talked about school studies and life by writing to my old friends. I also made a lot of new friends in this school. We talked more about our hobbies in our spare time.

All in all, I have lived a happier life and I feel more pleased with it.

教师点评:

初稿文章脉络较清晰,语句通顺,无语法错误,基本完成了写作任务的要求,但仍存在一些问题。首先在文章结构上,开头应用一两句话简要概括变化体现在哪些方面,而简单的一句"Great changes have taken place during my first year in senior school."并没有引出下文将要涉及到的内容要点,开头没有发挥其统领下文的作用。另外,由于文章缺少应有的衔接词,且句式单一,读后无法给人留下深刻的印象,感觉平淡,全篇像是一篇流水账。这些都应在成稿中加以改正。

成稿:

Great changes have taken place in my studies and life since I entered senior school a year ago. On the one hand, with the help of my teachers, I have become more interested in my studies, especially in English and Math.

Although it is much more difficult than what we studied in junior school, I’ve made great progress and was praised many times by both my teachers and my parents. On the other hand, I still keep in touch with my old friends as well as getting along well with my new classmates. I

often write to my old friends talking about my studies and life. Furthermore, I’ve made a lot of new friends in my new school and we often share our hobbies in the spare time.

In short, I’ve learned a lot from the books as well as from the people around me over the past year.

教师点评:

成稿文章开门见山地说明一年来自己在学习和生活方面发生的变化,从而明确了写作方向和主要内容,然后对这两个方面的情况作具体介绍。内容详实,表达准确,文章脉络清晰,层次分明。值得表扬的是"On the one hand"和"On the other hand"的使用将文章主要介绍的两个方面有机联系起来,过渡自然,显示出小作者清晰的写作思路。另外,状语从句"Although it is much more ..."和分词结构"... talking about my studies ..."的运用显示出小作者扎实的写作基础和比较成熟的表达能力,令文章增色不少。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Great changes have taken place in our hometown since the new policies and measures were introduced.

2. People are getting along well with their work and life here in this city.

3. Thanks to the efforts made by our government, villagers are living healthier than before.

4. They have been supplied with modern technology and new equipment, which make their work and life easier and more comfortable.

5. The beautiful environment has attracted lots of visitors from both home and abroad and has brought many new opportunities to our city.

巩固练习:

假如你是李华。你的美国笔友Lucy在网上看到关于你所在的城市发展日新月异,人们生活水平逐步提高的报道后,对此十分关注,并写信向你询问。请你给她写一封回信谈谈你的城市的变化。

注意:

1. 从身边点滴的生活变化来反映城市面貌的更新;

2. 内容充实,主题突出;语言连贯通顺,无语法错误;

3. 词数:120左右。书信的开头和结尾已经写好,不计入总词数。

Dear Lucy,

I’m glad to hear that you are interested in my city.

____________________________________________________________________________

Best wishes!

Yours,

Li Hua

本期巩固练习参考范文

Dear Lucy,

I’m glad to hear that you are interested in my city. As you read on the Internet, great changes have taken place here. It is more convenient to live in the city than before. Private cars are everywhere now. Lots of people shop on the Internet, which is especially popular among young people. What’s more, people are paying more attention to their health. You can find more people in the park or in their neighborhood, doing exercise. Even young people are paying lots of attention to their diet.

All in all, our city looks very different. I hope that you will be able to visit my city this summer holiday.

Best wishes!

Yours,

Li Hua

59. Plants

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你是李华,你的朋友Mary最近得到一份生日礼物——一盆兰花,请你用英语给她写一封120词左右的电子邮件告诉她应该如何种植兰花,要点如下:1. 土质要疏松;2. 不要在阳光下直晒;3. 不宜过多浇水,否则容易烂根;4. 及时剪去枯叶,尤其是有病虫侵害的叶子需及时清除。参考词汇:兰花orchid n.; 虫子worm n.

●写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是介绍如何种植一种植物,属于说明文,宜用一般现在时态。

2. 写作提示虽然逐条列出,但是一定要注意每条之间的联系,切忌文章太松散。

●初稿:

Dear Mary,

You asked me how to plant the orchid. Here, I have some suggestions for you.

The orchid needs a kind of special soil. The soil must be very loose. The soil should be easy for water to flow through. The orchid cannot be put directly in the sun. The orchid needs some covering. Don’t water the orchid too much, or it will die because its roots will rot. When some leaves become yellow, they ought to be cut off at once. Those leaves bitten by worms must be removed in case other healthy leaves are affected by them. If you follow the above suggestions, you will surely enjoy planting the orchid.

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

初稿时态运用正确,覆盖了所有要点。但是也存在一些不足之处:

1. 邮件的开头和结尾语气生硬,不太自然。可以改为:

I’m glad to hear from you. In your last email, you asked me how to plant an orchid. I’d like to share my experience with you ... Hope my experience will help you a lot.

2. 第二段层次不清晰,每句之间联系也不够紧密。比如可以在"避免阳光直晒"和"浇水"两个层次之间加上meanwhile或at the same time等连接词或短语。

3. 有些句子的表达略显生硬。应该加强对句型的掌握。如:The orchid cannot be put directly in the sun. The orchid needs some covering.可改为An orchid also likes shade, so please don’t put it directly in the sun.

4. 作者重复使用the orchid令文章显得很累赘,如果能用the plant, the flower或it来替代会使文章比较简洁。

●成稿:

Dear Mary,

I’m glad to hear from you. In your last email, you asked me how to plant an orchid. Let me tell you what I know. Good soil is the most important thing for the orchid. This plant needs a kind of loose soil to allow water to run through freely. The orchid also likes shade, so please don’t put it directly in the sun. You should also pay attention when watering it. Be sure not to water it a lot,

or its roots will rot and die. If some leaves turn yellow, cut them off at once, especially the ones that were bitten by worms, because they will affect other healthy ones. I hope this helps. Orchids are really nice plants. Good luck!

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

成稿最大的优点是虽然没有使用明显的表示层次的连接词,但是整篇文章衔接紧凑,自然流畅,尤其是第二段。仔细分析不难发现文中的一些用词其实已经起到了连接的作用。

例如:Good soil is the most important thing for the orchid. / The orchid also likes shade ... / You should also pay attention when watering it.

成稿的层次通过内在逻辑来表达的写作方式值得我们学习。PowerfulSentences:1. Be sure not to water ... a lot, or its roots will rot.2. I hope you will benefit from my experi-ence.3. Hope my experience will do good to you.

●巩固练习:

假如你的外教Jim 要过生日,你准备送给他一株文竹(asparagus fern)作为生日礼物,请你写一张120词左右的说明卡片,要点如下:1. 在中国它象征长寿与幸福;2. 在春、秋、冬三季,一般是盆土表面见干再浇水;在夏季,早晚都应该浇水;3. 不可暴晒。

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Jim,

Happy birthday! This is an asparagus fern, a birthday gift from me. In China, this plant is a symbol of happiness and a long life. Many people like its ever-green leaves, especially some scholars. Let me give you some tips on how to plant an asparagus fern.

The asparagus fern is easy to grow. The most important thing is how you water it. In seasons such as spring, autumn and winter, you are supposed to water it when the surface of the soil looks dry. In the summer it should be watered twice a day, in the morning and in the evening, because of the hot weather. Also remember not to leave it in the strong sunshine, or it will die.

I hope this helps you.

Yours,

Li Hua

60. Poetry

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你校正在组建一个英语诗社(English Poetry Society),请你写一封信申请入社。信的要点如下:热爱英语语言;对诗歌感兴趣;希望通过交流提高自己的英语水平。(词数:100左右)

●写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务要求写的是一封申请信,要使用第一人称,措辞要委婉礼貌。

2. 在写作时,要把多个要点的关系理顺,注意逻辑的严谨性和行文的规范性。

●初稿:

Dear Sir,

I am writing to you to show my wish to join the English Poetry Society.

I like English very much, and I am interested in poems very much. Every night I read both

Chinese poems and English poems. I want to write some English poems. I hope to make my English better by writing English poems, but I don’t know how to write. I never write English before. So I hope to join the English Poetry Society to improve my English and learn how to write English poems.

I am looking forward to your early reply.

Yours,

Li Ping

●教师点评:

本篇申请信格式正确,要点也全部叙述出来了,基本表达了作者想要加入诗社的意图。但也有不足之处:

1. 文章结构比较松散,缺乏连贯性和逻辑性。

2. 在陈述参加诗社的理由时,语言比较罗嗦,不够轻快自然。

3. 句式比较单一,缺乏长短结合的节奏感。

●成稿:

Dear Sir,

I am writing to you in the hope that I can join the English Poetry Society.

I have had a deep interest in poems since I was in junior middle school. It has inspired me to write poems in my spare time, especially poems about nature. I even once had two small Chinese poems published in the school paper. In addition, I really like English, and I can use simple English very well. I would like to improve my English by communicating with other members of the English Poetry Society and to learn more about English poems.

I am looking forward to your early reply.

Yours,

Li Ping

●教师点评:

1. 在语气上比较委婉,而且用自己曾经发表过两篇诗歌为例更具说服力。

2. 在用词方面更加精炼、准确。如:inspire me to ...等。

3. 作者对要点内容的适当发挥使这封申请信的内容更加充实。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. In my opinion, poems are an important part of our education.

2. A poem begins in delight and ends in wisdom.

3. Poetry is a very beautiful, impressive and widely effective way of saying things.

4. A great poem is like a fountain that is forever flowing with the waters of wisdom and delight.

5. The more poems I read, the crazier I become about them.

●巩固练习:

假如你们班刚参加了一个诗歌书法展,同学们感受颇多。请你写一篇120词左右的英语短文来陈述你的想法。可参照下列提示:

1. 古代诗歌是传统文化的结晶,它具有语言简练,意境优美等特点。

2. 努力发展现代诗歌。

3. 提议举办诗歌文化节,弘扬诗歌文化。

本期写作指导参考范文

It is said that poems are becoming less and less popular among young people, and fewer and fewer people like to read and write poems. This exhibition of poems reminds me of the beauty of

both ancient poems and modern poems.

Ancient poems show us Chinese traditional culture in a simple but rather beautiful way. Modern poems must keep up with the times and become a mirror of reality.

In my opinion, more activities like this exhibition should be held. They can help more people discover and learn about poems, which I think will encourage more and more people to write poems. I’m sure that poetry will regain its life in the future as long as we don’t give up.

61. Protect Relics

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你是李华,在某英文报纸上看到"Protect Relics"栏目正在征集优秀文章,请你根据给出的材料投稿给此栏目,号召大家保护文化遗址——荆州古城墙。

参考材料:

位置位于长江边上,湖北荆州城内时间有近20xx年的历史重要性

1. 曾是保存最完整的城墙之一,也是三国时期兵家必争之地, 现在仍发挥军事战略作用;

2. 古城墙不仅在建筑和历史上具有重要的研究价值,也是一个重要旅游景点。

存在问题

1. 由于开发商品房,一部分城墙被拆除;

2. 有一些人非法拆城砖,导致城墙破坏严重。

要求:100词左右。

参考词汇:古城墙ancient city wall

●分析:

1. 本次写作任务是号召大家保护古迹。文章体裁应该是说明文中夹有议论。此类以呼吁号召为写作目的的文章一般应包括:简介写作对象或意义阐述、提出问题、分析并解决问题几个方面。

2. 就本次写作任务而言,文章应该包括三部分内容:首先要对古城墙的地理位置和历史做简要介绍,并说明其历史意义及需要保护的必要性。接着提出问题,陈述古城墙保护目前所面临的困境,可以从提示中给出的两个方面分析商业发展和人为破坏给古城墙带来的威胁。最后要提出相应的解决问题的办法或建议,可以从法律、政府及群众的努力几个方面展开论述。

3. 介绍古迹、分析问题和提出方案这三部分是紧密相联的,在逻辑上是渐近的,因此组织语言时,要注意段落之间的衔接和过渡。

●初稿:

The Jingzhou ancient city wall lies in the bank of the Yangtze River. It has beautiful scenery and a long history. It is the ancient city wall that you can explore its long history and travel, which is called one of the best-kept ancient city walls in China. Besides, its history is more than 2000 years or less, and the city is still functioning well today. However, people destroy it seriously as the development of industry. Some of its bricks are missing. In my opinion, it’s time to protect the ancient city wall.

●教师点评:

文章尽管涵盖了要点内容,但从全篇布局看仍存在很多问题:

1. 文章对古城墙的介绍过于详细,而对主干部分的分析问题、解决问题一笔带过,使全篇布局头重脚轻。文章应在后两个部分上多着笔墨,给予更多有力的论据和建议。

2. 受中文思维的影响,有些句子的表达欠妥:

1) 句式不恰当:"It is the ancient city wall that you can explore ..."用了强调句型"It is ... that ...",这句话太长,中间没有停顿,使读者读起来很累。

2)介词使用错误:"as the development of industry"中as是连词,用来连接句子;应用with 连接名词短语。

●成稿:

I’m writing to call attention to Jingzhou ancient city wall. This wall has been standing for more than 2, 000 years. It’s not only a famous attraction, but also of great historical interest. It’s among the best-kept ancient city walls in China.

However, with the development of the economy, and an increase in tourism, it has begun to be damaged, and has even had bricks taken from it.

It’s high time we protected the city wall. It’s not wise to tear down a wall like this to make room for housing, or to re-move its bricks for construction purposes.

●赏析:

文章内容完整,涵盖了要点内容。将古城的介绍、现今存在的问题和自己的倡议分成三段,行文层次清楚明了。文中使用了not only ... but also ... 句式,it’s high time等句型,多种句式交替使用,避免了句式单调,给文章增色不少。本文虽然没有用到一些较复杂的高级词语,用词比较平实,但是贵在准确,所以整体上看来,是一篇成功之作

●Powerful sentences:

1. The government should also take mea-sures to bring it under the protection of the law.

2. We must realize that this ancient relic is threatened.

3. It’s never too late to take proper action.4. A wise use of technology will assist us in our efforts to ensure a well-kept city wall.

●巩固练习:

假如你是一位保护文化遗址的小志愿者,请你给世界文化组织写一封信,介绍你们当地的重要文化遗址——乌镇。

参考材料:

历史

1. 据说七千年前就有人居住;

2. 史料记载有一千两百年的历史。

地点位于杭州、苏州和上海三者形成的三角洲中间特色

1. 乌镇是江南水乡六大古镇之一,古风犹存的老街构成河街平行、水陆相邻的古镇格局。

2. 这里的民宅傍河而筑,街道两旁保存有大量明清建筑,辅以河上石桥,体现了小桥、流水、古宅的江南古镇风韵。

1. 开头已为你写好,不计入词数;

2. 字数100字左右。

Dear Sir,

I’d like to tell you about a relic in my hometown, Wuzhen._____________________________________________________________________________________________

_________

Yours,

Li Xiaohua

第7期巩固练习参考范文:

Dear Sir,

I’d like to tell you about a relic in my hometown, Wuzhen.Wuzhen, a town with a history of 1200 years, lies within the triangle formed by Hangzhou, Suzhou and Shanghai. Wuzhen displays its 1200-year history in its ancient stone bridges, still standing over clear water. The houses in this small town have white walls and black windows and roofs, looking as if they belong in a Chinese water and ink painting. The river running through the town was once the main local means of transportation, but these days is seldom used. It’s said that people have been living in Wuzhen for 7,000 years. Moreover, Wuzhen is a living town, with its ancient ways of life maintained.

Yours,

Li Xiaohua

62. Reading

写作指导

▲写作任务:

英语学习经验交流会上,你被要求向同学们推荐一种英语辅导刊物。请你从刊物的针对性、丰富性和实用性几个方面考虑,推荐一本适合中学生的英语杂志。要求条理清晰,词数100-120左右。内容提示:1.刊物类别说明;2.举例说明栏目版块及功能;3.对刊物进行简要评价。参考词汇:栏目column

▲任务分析:

本次的写作任务是介绍杂志,属于说明文写作。提示中要求通过举例说明栏目版块使读者了解所介绍的刊物,即把一个整体分为若干个部分逐个说明,这种写作手法是说明文中常用的分类法(division),就是把一个需要说明的事物按照一定的标准分为多个比较对象,分门别类进行说明。如,我们可以把一个超市分为食品区、日用品区、服装区和家电区等。与此类似的还有归类法(category),即把若干同类事物按照不同的标准分门别类。如,我们可以把手机按照功能分为通讯类、娱乐类和商务类等。使用分类法和归类法的关键是首先要为说明对象确定一个分类或归类的标准。就本次写作任务而言,我们要从刊物的不同栏目着手对其进行介绍。假设被推荐的刊物名为《英语拾零》(EnglishSidelights),文章首先要介绍此刊物的大致类别(英语学习类)、读者群体(高中生)等基本信息,使读者对所说明对象有一个概括性印象。第二部分逐点说明各个栏目的特征,并对其栏目内容进行举例说明。我们可以按照刊物在听、说、读、写方面的不同目标来对栏目进行分类。各个栏目的不同训练目标即是刊物不同版块进行分类的标准和依据。此部分还要结合举例法(exemplification),对每一个功能不同的版块进行列举。具体栏目可以自由发挥。由于本次写作是进行推荐,因此结尾还需要对该杂志的特点做个总结或进行简单评价。

▲初稿:

The English Sidelights is a good help to our English learning. It mainly trains 4 skills, as everyone knows, listening, speaking, reading and writing. The column of stories gives us a great deal of reading materials. The column of dialogue provides us with short talks. And the play part enclosed with CD, enables you to listen to the clips. Besides, the column of writing teaches us how to write an essay and gain some practical writing skills. To explain, the column of stories includes such programs as In the News, American Stories and Fun Story. They are about interesting news, which can greatly improve our abilities. To sum up, this magazine is designed

for English learners.

▲教师点评:

本篇作文成功地运用了分类法,结构基本符合内容提示的三要点,栏目介绍丰富充实。但在第二部分对栏目的分类介绍还有待提高,主要表现在以下方面:

1. 对栏目的介绍只是内容的单纯堆砌,没有明确分类依据。尽管栏目的功能能从其内容中体现出来,但最好还是明确说明。另外第二段在逐一介绍了四个方面的栏目后又对"Story"的栏目内容具体说明,破坏了文章的平衡性。

2. 结构上,作者在第一段里以listening, speaking, reading and writing的次序展开,而下面的段落里却是以reading, speaking, listening and writing 的顺序进行说明,导致前后不一致,打乱了逻辑顺序,需要调整,这也是我们在处理类似作文时需要格外留心的部分。其次,本文的最后一段行文略显仓促,对杂志的特色没做充分的说明。2. 表达上,首先是句式,虽然作者用了较多的定语从句,但是句子几乎都是以"The column of ..."开头,比较单一,建议多样化;此外,在第二段中,作者使用了you和us,犯了人称不一致的错误,应统一为第一或第二人称。 ▲成稿:

The magazine, English Sidelights, is designed to improve the four basic English language skills, namely reading, writing, speaking and listening. The story columns include: News,

American Story and Jokes. We also find well-written English articles which are informative and suitable for improving students’reading comprehension. In the writing column, writing skills are explained. In addition, there are also columns dealing with dialogues and plays, which can help us with our speaking and listening. The four parts are integrated together to provide all-round practice and are designed for English learners to improve their language abilities while being entertained.

▲成稿赏析:

本文内容全面,无论是开头、正文,还是结尾,在篇幅的把握上都恰到好处,在有限的字数要求里出色地完成了介绍任务,反映了作者统筹全文的思维比较缜密,值得借鉴。此外,在用词上,如:namely, well-written等词的应用,都是文章的亮点。

▲Powerful sentences:

1. It presents newsworthy events.

2. It is exclusively about world affairs.

3. Just like an encyclopedia, it contains such fields as ...

4. The magazine presents in-depth reports and objective articles.

5. The layout and design of the magazine is neat.

▲巩固练习:

你的外教刚到中国不久,到报亭买杂志时面对种类繁多的刊物感到难以取舍。请你向他介绍不同类别的刊物,以帮助他做出选择。

要求:1.分类合理,条理清晰;2.词数100-120左右。

第18期巩固练习参考范文

The magazines and newspapers in the news stand cover sports, fashion, travel and English study. The magazines and newspapers dealing with sports can be divided into several categories. For example, The World of Football, Sports Illustrated and Slam is about basketball. Fashion magazines include clothing trends, such as Bazaar, Cosmopolitan and Elle. They are a young lady’s favorite.

As for me, I am very interested in travel. I always choose Travel and Leisure.

And my favorite is the USA-based magazine National Geographic. It offers columns with

plentiful articles on travel in foreign countries and well-shot pictures. Last but not least, I also buy The China Daily and The 21st Century to improve my English.

63. Relationship

写作指导

●写作任务:

请写一篇文章记叙一件发生在你和邻居之间的事,刊登在你班的英语板报上。

写作要求:

1. 内容完整、主题突出;

2. 连贯通顺、语法正确;

3. 词数:120左右。

●写作分析:

本次写作任务要求记叙一件发生在你和邻居之间的事,属于记叙文范畴。记叙文须具备六个基本要素,即时间、地点、人物、起因、经过和结果。本次写作任务属于侧重记事的记叙文,应采取一定的叙述顺序,将基本要素组织成一篇通顺连贯的文章。本次的写作话题围绕我和邻居展开,这个话题是同学们十分熟悉的。在我们的生活中,你和自己的邻居之间想必也发生过一些让你印象深刻的事,也许是和邻居一起出门游玩,或是因为各家的宠物产生了小摩擦,更多的是邻里间的互相关爱与帮助,比如没带钥匙的时候,向邻居寻求帮助等,而这些都是同学可以用于写作的素材,当然文章所叙之事要客观真实,不可胡编乱造。

在写作过程中,同学们可以在第一段中用简单的一句话概括整件事,引出下文,或说明这件事发生的时间、地点和人物,总之第一段应起到引出下文的作用。紧接着在第二段中具体记叙这件事的经过,这一段是文章的重点,记叙文的要素也应在第二段中得到充分体现,这样文章读起来才会言之有物。在具体记叙事件时,应避免平铺直叙,细节的描写可以为文章增加可读性,比如增加对人物动作、语言和表情的刻画,或是对当时周围环境的描写。最后一段交代这件事的结果,或用一句话概括自己的感受,起到画龙点睛的作用。需要注意的是,最后一段并非文章的重点,因此应合理得体地抒发感受。

在语言方面,既然是记叙一件已经发生过的事,因此通篇时态应使用过去时。同学们可以尝试使用复合句,而不要过多地使用简单句,另外形容词和副词的合理使用也可为你的文章增色不少。

●初稿:

One day, my mom must take an operation in a hospital in another city. My father must look after her, so I could only stay at my neighbor’s house for about one week.

At the beginning, I was so nervous and worried about my mom. Mrs. Wang helped me a lot. Every day, she cooked different and delicious food, and spent a lot of time talking with me. One week passed quickly and I had a wonderful time there. When my parents came back, they were also very happy.

In my opinion, neighbors should respect each other, and offer help when needed. That is the key to keep a good relationship with each other.

●教师点评:

初稿是一篇合格的习作,基本完成了写作要求,但是文章还是存在一些不足。在内容安排上,初稿的结构不够合理,开篇没有对事件大体概况的介绍,而是直接描述事件的起因,令读者感到突兀茫然。第二段的内容不够丰富,太平淡,给人以白开水的感觉,应在成稿中加入一些更为

细致的描写,丰富此部分内容。此外,在语言上,第一段不够简洁,语言繁冗,且第二段缺少句与句之间的衔接,给人以生硬之感,这些都应在成稿中加以改正。

●成稿:

I once lived in my neighbor Mrs. Wang’s home for a week when my mom was having an operation in a hospital in another city and my dad went with her to look after her. At first I was so worried about my mom that I couldn’t concentrate on studying, but Mrs. Wang really helped me a lot. She cooked delicious food, talked with me, and invited me to go walking with her after supper. What she did made me less nervous, and I was gradually able to concentrate on my studies. When my mother came back, she was healthy and was happy to know that I had such a good week. I can still remember Mrs. Wang’s kind smile, and our two families are keeping good relationship with each other now.

●教师点评:

成稿内容充实、描写生动、结构合理、语言娴熟,很好地完成了写作任务。首先在内容方面,第一段用简洁的语言引出下文,第二段具体记叙了事件的经过,并在最后一段表达了自己的感受。结构清晰、主题突出。在语言上,成稿熟练地运用了状语从句及主语从句,如"... for a week when my mom ...", 和"What she did made me less nervous",令文章紧凑、通顺、连贯。 ●Powerful Sentences:

1. A distant relative is less likely to help you out than a near neighbor.

2. My neighbor ... is a(n) kind lady / cute boy / old man / pretty girl, who ...

3. I have a good / bad relationship with my neighbor, because ...

4. When I opened the door, I saw my neighbor standing in front of me with a bag of ...

5. Last Saturday, I went to the city park / cinema / concert / restaurant with my neighbor. ●巩固练习:

母亲节很快就要到了,请你写一篇英语短文记叙一次母亲节的经历,参加某英文网站主题为"Mother and I"的征文活动。词数:120左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

Mother and I

Mother’s Day is coming. On this day we can show our mothers our thanks.

Last Mother’s Day, I had a good time with my mom. I got up early in the morning and cooked a delicious breakfast. My mom said I was a wonderful cook. After that, we went to the park and took lots of pictures. The sky was blue, the sun was warm, and the air was fresh. We rented a boat and rowed around the lake. That day I said to my mom: thank you, mom. I will love you forever.

This year’s Mother’s Day will come in a month. I am planning for another celebration. I hope every mother will spend a wonderful time with her beloved children.

64. School Life

写作指导

■写作任务:

高一生活已经过去一半,在你的学习、校园活动和结交朋友等方面都

有哪些值得你回味的事情呢?请写一封信给你的英国笔友Max,向他讲讲高一

生活中让你觉得获益颇多的一件事。注意:词数100-120左右。

Dear Max,

______________________________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________

Best regards,

Wang Hui

■任务分析:

本次的写作任务是记叙让你获益颇多的事。对学生而言,高一生活所涵盖的内容有很多,难忘的事情也不止一件,但是我们不可能通过一篇小短文把所有内容都包涵在内,因此在选材方面就必须注意选取能够以小见大的"点",即有代表性的某件事,来反映整个"面",即宽泛的高一生活;在选定某"点"后,我们接下来就可以按"总—分—总"或"总—分"的结构展开叙述。 具体的写法如下:

首先在开头做总述,对高一生活进行总结性的回顾,如:高一生活带给我全新的体验,我学到了很多书本外的知识。在接下来的段落里,你需要给出具体的事例来支撑首段观点。由于是记叙文,因此在事件描述过程中要注意事件的层次发展。结尾段和开头相互照应,能够有所升华那就更好。

■初稿:

Dear Max,

My senior high school has begun for several months. Although it has not been long enough, I have learned about some experiences out of the books. One day, our math teacher introduced us a reference book and he said each of us should get one. I volunteered to buy the books for the whole class. And then I went to some book shops to select the book. When I finally found the book, I bargained with the shop owner. Successfully, every book was cut down to 8 yuan and the price tag read 10 yuan. Therefore, I made this deal. I collected the money in the class, paid for and checked the books and gave them to my classmates. I gained my knowledge from a larger book, our society.

Best regards,

Wang Hui

■教师点评:

文章条理比较清楚。正文第二段的叙述体现了细节,符合记叙文的要求。但是文章的开头和结尾稍显平淡,尤其是结尾太过仓促,有跑题之嫌,需要向更贴近"学校生活"的主题改进。此外,文章的句式比较单一,缺少变化;在一些词语的用法上还不够准确。具体表现在以下几个方面:

1. 在开头和结尾上,可以更简单明了些,建议改为:The senior high school has brought me a new experience. In addition to study, I have also grasped the chance to touch the society. 至于结尾,可以改为:As to this deed, I not only contributed to my class, but also enriched my school life with social experience.

2. 在句法和词法上,简单句可以通过合并变成复合句。例如,every book was cut down to 8 yuan and the price tag read 10 yuan,这句话用定语从句合并成一句话后表达效果更好:every book was cut down to 8 yuan, whose price tag read 10 yuan。另外,文中还出现了一些时态和语法错误,例如:My senior high school has begun for several months, begun是不可持续的动词,用在该处不妥;再者,"获得知识"英文表达为gain knowledge,加上our显得画蛇添足了。另外,"得到……方面的知识"可以说gain knowledge of ...,例如gain knowledge of social science;learn只有与about搭配时才表示"了解"的意思,单独用时意思多为"学习,获悉,认识到"。

■成稿:

Dear Max,

Senior high school has provided me with a new start, including study and social practice as well.

In our first math class, our teacher told each of us to buy a new textbook. Considering the burdens each of us already had from our studies, I volunteered to buy the books for the whole class. I went to several bookshops to check and bargain before finally getting them for 8 yuan per book, down from 10 yuan. I collected the money and handed the books to my classmates. Everyone was pleased by the saving.

Through this experience, I became well known to the other students in the class.

Best regards,

Wang Hui

■Powerful sentences:

1. In addition to keeping us busy with study, the high school also provides us with

opportunities to get involved in the local community.

2. I was not used to haggling over prices in the beginning.

3. I’m happy to have been able to con- tribute to the class.

■巩固练习:

每个人都经历过尴尬的时刻,你经历过怎样的尴尬事呢?某英语网站就"An Embarrassing Moment"为话题展开网络调查,请你以此为题写一篇英语短文。注意:词数100左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

As is often the case, it’s embarrassing to mistake a stranger for someone you know.

Sometime last month, I was walking along the street when I noticed a girl that looked just like one of my classmates, but I couldn’t remember her name. I smiled at her and she smiled back. It was then that I decided to approach her and greet her. We had a pleasant conversation for ten minutes, but we didn’t mention our names. After we parted, I discovered that she was a saleswoman and she had also mistaken me for one of her childhood friends. This is one of the most embarrassing moments I’ve ever had!

65. School Life

写作任务:

假如你是李华,你的美国笔友Bob正在考虑来中国学习,但是他听说中国学生的学习生活非常紧张,经常考试,为此他感到很忧虑。请你给Bob写一封E-mail(词数不少于120),向他介绍国家提倡素质教育以后,你们校园生活所发生的巨大变化。

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是一篇书信体裁的作文。它要求学生能够将所学的知识充分运用到实际生活中去,能够清晰准确地用英语传达信息。

2. 本封信的内容是向你的一个外国朋友介绍你的校园生活。文章以第一人称为主,时态使用一般过去时和一般现在时。

3. 进行写作时,首先要问候对方;其次介绍原来国内中学生的学习状况;接下来介绍现在国内中学生的学习生活,包括课堂活动和课外活动两个方面;最后对Bob来中国学习表示欢迎。

4. 虽然题目要求写出国家提倡素质教育前后中学生学习生活的变化,但是切忌没有重点。要着重描述目前校园生活的多姿多彩。可适当发挥,增添细节。

初稿:

Dear Bob,

Hi! I heard that you want to come to China. I’m very happy to hear that.

Now, I will tell you something about my school life. In the past, students had to face lots of examinations. We had many classes, homework and exams. The school life was very tiring. Besides, too much homework left us little time to rest. So we often felt sleepy in class. One night, I even fell asleep while doing my homework. Now, the school life turns colorful. In class, students can discuss the questions. Sometimes students can play the role of the teacher. Students have many kinds of activities after class. We read interesting books, do some sports, join in English Corner and so on. This kind of school life is interesting.

Welcome to China! Welcome to our school. I’m looking forward to seeing you soon.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

这篇习作所使用的词汇和语法结构基本准确,能满足写作任务的要求,基本达到写作目的。 不足之处在于:

1.行文安排布置不流畅。开头未点明Bob来中国的目的是为了学习,所以后文介绍中国中学生的学习状况略显突兀。

2. 文章只是单纯地描述了两种学校生活,没有突出重点。因此也就没有很好地达到帮助朋友消除忧虑的目的。

成稿:

Dear Bob,

I’ve received your letter, and I am very glad to learn that you are coming to China to study. What you heard in the past about our schooling is true. We used to have a lot of homework every day, even on weekends and vacations. Having endless exams was another characteristic of our school.

However, now we have mastered studying, and our school life is getting more and more colorful and interesting. In class, we are active in discussing and solving problems. Sometimes one of the students is asked to teach other students. I love this kind of teaching method —it makes me feel I am a great student. After class, we enjoy a variety of activities, such as dancing, making speeches, and joining in English Corner. As far as I know, everyone is happy with their lives in our school.

I hope you come to my school to study. I’m sure that you will soon like it and we will become very close friends.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

这封邮件格式正确,内容衔接恰当,给人一气呵成之感。介绍素质教育改革前后的状况时,主次分明,详细生动。最让人称赞的是,本文人情味很浓,读起来好像真的是给自己的一个朋友写信。这也是英语新课程标准对写作的新要求,即增加了情感因素。在准确流畅表达写作要领的同时,适当增加句子的人情味,使文章读起来更亲切,完全达到与目标读者进行交流的目的。例如:"As far as I know, everyone is happy with their lives in our school."表示作者对现在生

活的喜悦心情。"I hope you can come to my school to study ... we will become very close friends."表示作者对朋友的浓厚情谊。

Powerful Sentences:

1. I’m very glad to learn that you are com-ing to China.

2. I’m writing to tell you something about ...

3. I have received your letter of May 20th.

4. Words can’t express my delight in finding your letter from yesterday.

5. I can’t wait for your arrival.

6. Waiting for your good news.

7. We did all kinds of exercises without stopping.

8. Now I have more free time, so I can develop my own interests such as reading, visiting museums and taking computer lessons. Also, I can go to bed earlier.

9. But now we often discuss and try to solve the problems raised by the teachers. After class, we enjoy different kinds of activities instead of doing endless homework.

10. I’m sure that our school life will be-come more and more colorful and interesting.

巩固练习:

你的外教Gabby向你了解你学校的课外活动情况,请你写一篇120词左右的E-mail,向他介绍你校的各项文体活动(包括运动、课外兴趣班)的具体时间和地点安排,以及同学们对课外活动的建议。

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Gabby,

I’m very happy to introduce our out-of-class activities to you. We have many kinds of out-of-class activities from 4:45 to 5:30 in the afternoon, including sports, reading, computer club, painting and handicraft making. Some students read their favorite books in the reading-room. Some play football or basketball on the playground. If you like creative activities, you can make websites in the computer club or make handicraft by yourself in the workshop. As for students who are fond of painting, they can choose one of the art studios to learn painting, like water color. You see, most of us can develop our own interests and enjoy our school life. In addition, we strongly suggest that an English Corner should be set up so that we can talk to each other in English. It may help improve our oral English. Best wishes.

Yours,

Bob

66. Science and Technology

写作任务:

假设你们班要开一次关于"发明创造"的英语主题班会,请你充分发挥自己的想象力,想象一种你认为最有用的机器并写一篇120词左右的短文,以这种机器的名称为题目,在文中详细描写它的功能、如何使用它以及它将如何改变人们的生活。写作分析:

这是一篇描写事物的开放性作文,要求学生充分发挥自己的想象力,想象出一个有用的机器并描述它。根据要求,在所写的作文中,必须覆盖以下三个要点:1. 想象中的机器;2. 它的使用方法;3. 介绍它如何改变人们的生活。文章应使用第一人称,时态使用将来时。 初稿:

A Sleeping Machine I think this useful machine can be called a sleeping machine. It can

make us fall asleep in the shortest time to have an enough rest. When we want to sleep, we can wear the machine around our heads, and then it can control our mind to fall into a deep sleep quickly.

As we all know, humans need at least 8-hour sleep every day. Or we will feel uncomfortable in the daytime, and even fall ill. If we have a sleeping machine, 3-hour sleep every day is enough for us. Then we can do more things that we didn’t have time to do. If we have sleeping machines, we can have a sleep whenever we like, so we can enjoy the midnight time. We can observe the behavior of bats, cats and mice at night. It must be very interesting. If we have a sleeping machine, we can also watch sunrise early in the morning without struggling to get up.

教师点评:

文中想象的机器有一定的合理性和实用性,而且作者将其使用方法和用途及它带来的生活变化描写得比较清楚。但不足之处在于:

一、文章的开头比较生硬,结尾处没有概括性的语言。

二、在表达"如果我们有了这种机器,我们就能……"的句式时,重复使用了一个结构,语言不够丰富。

成稿:

A Sleeping Machine

If we can only get 3 hours of sleep a day, we will need a sleeping machine which can make us fall into the deepest sleep in the shortest amount of time to get enough rest. Just 3 hours every day would make us feel refreshed.

It would be easy to manage. We would just put the machine around our heads, and then it would control our brains to make us fall into a deep sleep quickly.

With this machine we would be able to do more things that we couldn’t do before, such as watching movies and reading our favorite books. With sleeping machines, we would have a good rest whenever we like, so that we could enjoy our midnights. We could observe the behavior of bats, cats and mice at night. It would be very interesting. We could also watch the sunrise early in the morning without struggling to get up.

In a word, with this machine, we would have more time to enjoy life.

教师点评:

本文的优点在于开头结尾相呼应,一脉相承。而且句式富于变化,衔接合理,使得语言表达非常流畅。

Powerful Sentences:

1. In the future, we may even be able to use machines to ...

2. With the development of technology, many changes have taken place in our lives.

3. Computers have developed very quickly and have greatly changed our lives.

4. The Internet is playing a more and more important role in our daily lives.

5. In a word, the Internet has made our lives more interesting.

巩固练习:

假设将来有一天能让你拥有一种超能来帮助那些需要帮助的人,你希望是什么样的能力?为什么?请据此写一篇文章,向某科技英语杂志社投稿,题目自拟。(词数:120左右)

本期写作指导参考范文

My Wish Computers have developed very quickly and have greatly changed our lives. Maybe one day I will be able to enter other people’s dreams and communicate with them with the help of computers. Many people who have been badly injured in accidents cannot speak, hear or

move. They accept their families’ care but they cannot communicate with them. Both the patients and the families are suffering, especially the patients who are very lonely. I would enter the patients’ dreams, tell them that their families care about them and listen to the patients. Then I would go to tell their families the thoughts of the patients. It would be an honor for me to do these kinds of things.

Of course, I would not enter other people’s dreams without permission, since people need to have their own personal space.

67. Space Science

写作指导

写作任务:

假如国际共青团为了提高中学生对太空科学的热爱,准备组织一个太空爱好者的夏令营活动,成员们可以互相交流,并允许去一个发射塔(launching tower)参观。假如你是李华,听到后非常感兴趣,请你用英语写一封申请信。

申请信的开头及结尾已给出:

Dear Sir, I was so excited to hear the news that

______________________________________________________________________

Yours,

Li Hua

写作分析:

1. 本次写作任务是写一封申请信,属于应用文,宜用一般现在时态和一般将来时态, 通篇文章宜使用第一人称。

2. 信的格式已给出,信的主体部分要简单介绍你的情况,并明确表达你想参加该夏令营的愿望及理由,同时注意写作要点之间衔接要自然流畅。

初稿:

Dear Sir,

I was so excited to hear the news that you are going to organize a summer camp for space lovers. I am writing to you to show my wish to become a member of it. I am a middle school student from China. I often wonder how large space is, what exists there and whether there is any life. I think this is a good chance to learn about space. I can take the opportunity to prepare myself as a future spacewoman. I can speak and listen to simple English well. I have the confidence of communicating with children from other countries. I want to learn more space knowledge. I am expecting for the visit to the launching tower. Therefore, I think I’m the best person. Please think about my application and answer me quickly.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

本文时态和人称运用正确,格式符合体裁要求。基本传递了想要参加本次夏令营活动的愿望,比较清晰地介绍了自己的情况,基本达到本次写作任务的目的。

但是本文的瑕疵也是很明显的。申请信的主体部分陈述原因时,简单堆砌,结构松散。此外,结尾Please think about my application and answer me quickly.语气生硬,影响交际的效果。 成稿:

Dear Sir,

I was so excited to hear the news that you are going to organize a summer camp for space lovers. I am writing to let you know that I would very much like to become a member of it. I am a middle school student in China. I am very curious about the mysteries of space. I have had a hobby of collecting various pictures of starry nights since primary school. I can also speak and understand simple English well, and I would like to communicate with children from other countries. I would like to share my knowledge of space with them, and to learn more from them. I am also very interested in visiting the launch tower. I know it will be very interesting and rewarding. I would appreciate it if you could take my application into consideration.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

1. 文章达到了用英语交际的目的,明确地传递了作者参与此次夏令营的渴望,同时还给出了充分的理由。

2. 文章逻辑顺畅,在每一个写作要点之间作者运用了恰当的连接词。

3. 文章结构严谨。第二段在简单自我介绍以及陈述理由后很自然地表达了自己的愿望。此外,第一段和最后一段前后照应。结尾委婉礼貌I would appreciate it if you could take my application into consideration.

Powerful Sentences:

1. I was very happy to receive your letter.

2. I’m writing to you mainly to ...

3. I’m so glad to hear the news that ...

4. Looking forward to your reply.

5. I would appreciate it if you could give me a chance to try.

6. I think I’m the best candidate.

7. I think I’m the most suitable person for the job.

巩固练习:

科学家一直在致力于寻找地球以外的生命,如果真的存在地球外生命(the intelligent life),你最想对他们说些什么呢?假如你校即将就此开展一次英语征文活动,请你写一篇短文谈谈自己的想法。

本期写作指导参考范文

Scientists have been making attempts to find intelligent life on other planets. If one day we really find them, I will tell them, "Let’s be friends. "We humans once had wars, bringing us countless problems, so I hope that the same thing doesn’t happen again. Let’s be friends! We have been living in the universe alone for thousands of years, and we are eager to find beings similar to us to share life with. Of course, I’ll also ask them some questions such as, "Do you live on rice or bread too?" "Do you also have pop stars like Jay Chou, or Cai Yilin?" and "Do you hate to go to hospital?"

I have such a strong desire to reach out to them that we will talk with each other for many days when we meet in future.

68. Sports

写作任务:

假如你是李华,你所在的学校下周要开运动会,请你根据以下要点给你的外教Peter写一封邀请信,邀请他来参加你校的运动会,并参加教师项目的比赛。(词数:120左右)信件要点如下:

开始时间:4月29日早上8:00

地点:北校区大操场

学生项目:田赛、径赛教师项目:4 ×100米接力赛,拍球跑

参考词汇:opening ceremony开幕式; 拍球跑running with a ball

写作分析:

1. 这是一封邀请信。邀请信涉及到一个即将举行的活动,因此时态应主要使用一般将来时;

2. 要合理安排所给材料的内容,注意上下文衔接,使文章条理清晰,逻辑严谨;

3. 作为邀请信,语气要恭敬,语言要言简意赅。

初稿:

Dear Peter,

How are you doing recently?

A sports meet will be held on April 29th in our school. The opening ceremony will begin at 8:00 in the morning. The sports meet will include field events and track events for students, such as the high jump and the long jump. Meanwhile, there are also some games for teachers, such as 4 ×100 relay race and running with a ball. They must be very interesting.

I wrote this letter to invite you to take part in the sports meet and take part in the teachers’ events. You are good enough to win the games. Please come on and join us. We will cheer for you. Be sure to come. Don’t let us down.

If you have any question, please call me as soon as possible. We’re looking forward to seeing you.

Best wishes.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

短文将运动会时间、地点等情况表达得很清楚,但作为邀请信还有以下几点不足:

1. 作为邀请信的开头,没有开门见山写清写信的目的,给目标读者一种"一头雾水"之感。

2. 文中"Please come on and join us." "Be sure to come. Don’t let me down."等句的表达使语气显得过于生硬。

成稿:

Dear Peter,

I am writing to invite you to take part in the teachers’ events at the sports meet at our school. The sports meet will be held on April 29th at our school. The opening ceremony will begin at 8:00 in the morning. The sports meet will include track and field events for students, such as the high jump and the long jump.

There will also be some games for teachers, such as the 4×100 relay race and running with a ball. It will be a lot of fun. I hope you are interested in the teachers’ events and we are all looking forward to your coming. Thank you and I will call you tomorrow.

Best wishes.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

成稿的最大优点在于尊重了英美文化习俗的差别。

首先,开门见山,信的第一句话就对目标读者进行邀请。

其次,在信中措辞谦和,不强加于人,给读者以礼貌却不失热情之感。

总之,此文符合邀请信的要求,达到了题目所要求的写作目的,不失为一篇佳作。

Powerful Sentences:

(表示"邀请")

1. We would like you to join us.

2. It will be a lot of fun if you come with us tonight.

3. We hope you can spare some time to come.

4. I will call you on Friday morning to make sure that you are coming.

巩固练习:

假如你是校报记者,请你将以下比赛的情况写成一篇小新闻,向校报"英文资讯专栏"投稿,可适当增添内容。(词数:100左右)

高一(1)班篮球队与高一(5)班篮球队于周五下午在学校操场举行了一场比赛,结果是高一(1)班以76比59取得了胜利。

本期写作指导参考范文

A basketball game between Class One and Class Five in Grade One took place last week. The game, held on the school playground last Friday afternoon, was organized by the Students’ Union. It was really very exciting. Many students stood around the playground cheering for the teams. All of the players did a good job. Class One won the game. The score was 76 to 59. Many students said that they enjoyed an excellent game.

69. The Internet

写作指导

●写作任务:

网络从开始发展到现在给我们的生活带来了极大的变化,请你写一篇文章,向某英文报刊投稿,联系实际,从一两个方面举例说明网络对自身生活的改变。词数:120左右。

●任务分析:

本次的写作任务要求就某一现象发表自己的看法。一般来说,这类作文的段落是由主题句(topic sentence),扩展句(development / supporting sentence)和结论句(concluding sentence)三部分构成。主题句要表述作者的态度和认识,观点要明确;扩展句必须清晰详实,就是要简明扼要并言之有物,本次话题涉及新事物带来的变化,因此要从新事物产生前后的差异体现"变化"这一内容,例证能充分地支持观点;结论句要对整篇文章进行概括总结,预测可能要发生的事,提出能引起读者兴趣或注意的观点,以表达更广的含义。

就本文而言,我们可以列出如下提纲:(1)提出观点。陈述网络发展的客观事实,引出话题。(2)论证观点。举例说明网络对人们的交流、学习、工作方式及其他领域的影响。另外,在举例中要突出"变化",还要对网络产生前后的生活变化进行对比。因此,这一部分不但要求作者条理清晰地给出例子,还考察作者对两种事物进行比较的能力。(3)总结。适当点评网络的影响力,发表自己的看法。如:网络为人们带来了便利,但也有其负面影响,因此,人们要扬长避短地使用网络。写作中要注意的问题:首先要切题,不能因"网络"这一话题的普遍性而宽泛地发挥,

要写出实实在在的内容来;其次,不要重复主题句,要用例证对主题句进行详细说明;最后,要用好过渡词,使文章连贯通顺。

●初稿:

Times are changing, and so is the way of communication, especially the Internet, which changes the world completely in recent years. The Internet is faster and much more convenient. And it has magically connected all the world as a whole! Through the Internet, people can learn about the latest news around the world with only a "click". It has really benefited people and has become a necessary part of life. It is the Internet that not only enables students to study at home in front of the computers, but also make people in different countries come together to hold a meeting.

In a word, without Internet, the world can not be the one we are living in.

●教师点评:

本文最明显的特点是句型结构较为丰富,如倒装句(... and so is the way of communication),强调句(it is the Internet that ...),not only ... but also ...等;文章多为长句和复杂句,显示了作者语言运用的基本功。但文章对于主题的论证技巧还有待提高。主要问题表现在:(1)第二部分对网络带给人们生活的变化的例证论述不够具体充分。如果作者将网络的其他功能,如影像传输(image transfer)、网上购物(Internet shopping)等内容加进来,这篇短文就会更丰富,更具说服力。(2)对于网络带来的变化没有充分体现。作者只是说明了人们网络生活的便利而没有将网络产生前后人们的生活变化加以对比。

另外,段落之间的过渡以及句子之间的衔接还有待改进,如a necessary part of life ...和It is the internet ...之间建议加上in addition之类的小词。文章在细节表达上也还存在一些小问题,例如,all the world的表达建议改为the entire world或the entire globe;结尾处的can换成would,表虚拟语气。

●成稿:

In modern society, the Internet has brought revolutionary changes to our life. It has not only brought the classroom into our homes, but it also helps businessmen trade faster and more efficiently. Before the Internet became available to the public, the main way people communicated was by post and telephone. Now we have new communication tools, such as QQ and MSN. With a computer and an Internet connection, we can call our friends or colleagues anytime and transfer documents by merely clicking the mouse. In addition, online learning provides us with many free study materials. Compared with the traditional "sit-in-the-classroom" method, the Internet enable students to share learning experiences with people who live in other cities, and to take part in discussions with pals around the world.

To sum up, the Internet has made a big difference to our life. Although there are negative sides of the Internet, we should make good use of its advantages to improve our life.

●成稿赏析:

文章涵盖了要点内容,三段式的结构条理清晰,使用了较多的复杂句式。尤其值得一提的是,

第二段作者在展开网络给人们生活带来的变化时,采用了对比法,更能说明网络的影响力。此外,文章的结尾提到了网络带来的消极影响,虽只是一笔带过,但显示了作者缜密的思维习惯。 ●Powerful sentences:

1. On the whole, we will benefit a lot from computers if we use them properly.

2. However, there still exist some problems, such as online scams.

3. All in all, there is still much room for improvement as concerns Internet service.

●巩固练习:

今年8月,奥运会在北京顺利召开了。奥运会带给我们的不仅仅是经济的快速增长,而且影响了我们生活的各个方面。请你以"Wind of the Olympics"为题写一篇英语短文,参与北京双语广播电台关于奥运改变生活的嘉宾谈话。要求:逻辑合理;内容充实。词数:120左右。

本期巩固练习参考

Wind of the Olympics

The 2008 Olympic Games held in Beijing affects the whole nation in many ways.

The greatest effect of the event is that it attracts more foreign capital into China. Many foreign investment businesses and individuals have been looking forward to this opportunity, hoping that they can make a profit investing in China. Also, it is a good chance to show ourselves. With large numbers of tourists coming to this event, Chinese tourism and service industries have an opportunity to advertise their good points. To meet the needs of foreign tourists, China has put its strength in construction in the hope of letting the world know about a modern China and making friends with the outside world. In a word, the influence of the 2008 Olympic Games is not just limited to the two weeks but will last in the coming years.

70. The Most Unforgettable Experience in My Life 写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你校英语报正在征集"The Most Unforgettable Experience in My Life"的稿件,请你写一篇110词左右的短文投稿。

分析:

1. 本次写作任务给出的是一篇命题作文——一次最难忘的经历,因此文章的体裁应该是记叙文。记叙文是写作训练中最普遍、最基本的一种文体。这种类型的作文关注的是一个特别的经历或者事件,要求学生根据话题或者提供的情景把经历或者事件叙述完整。记叙文应包含几个基本要素:when, where, who, what, how,有时可以加上why。由于事件总要经历一定的发展过程,因此记叙文的写作也要按照时间的推移或空间的位移来进行叙述。要注意的是,对事件的叙述不应是面面俱到的写实报道,而应着重于对关键人物和关键事件的描写。

2. 这类文章一般可以分为三个部分,下面就以本次写作任务来分析记叙文的写作。

第一部分,描述事件前的铺垫。开头可以交待事件发生的时间、地点和起因等基本信息,以便引入正文;也可以直接告知读者事件的结果,然后再倒叙事件发展的过程。也可以先交待事件的重要性,然后再引出事件内容。

第二部分,文章的主体部分。在这部分要详细介绍事件发生的时间、地点、人物以及事件发生、发展和结果等具体内容。叙述要遵循一定的时间顺序,并对关键人物和重要事件进行重点描写。注意事件之间的逻辑关系,使文章脉络清晰。可以使用过渡词或短语,比如then, therefore, as a result, so, finally, soon等来连接句子和段落。细节的描写可以使叙述内容更加生动、有趣。

第三部分,结尾。可以告诉读者事情的结果或者你的感受。要清晰地传达某种心情或者感受。也可以重申一下这次经历的重要性,并表述自己从这次经历中总结出的经验、教训等内容,使文章的内涵得到升华。

●初稿:

There was a big earthquake that happened in my hometown, Sichuan.

I was having English class with my classmates in the classroom. Suddenly, everything

around us began to shake. We were all very scared. The roof was falling. I felt someone pushing me, and I tried my best to run out of the classroom. Luckily, we all ran out of the classroom and only a few got hurt.

After the earthquake, we set up many tents to live in and received a lot of food.

●教师点评:

这篇文章基本上包含了事件发生的时间、地点、人物、经过和结果等基本要素,但是文章有几处明显的缺陷:

1. 文章的标题是"The Most Unforgettable Experience in My Life",但是全文都没有提到所叙述事件之难忘,没有突出这次经历的重要性。文章开头应该用一些总结性的语言将这次经历的重要性表述出来,以引出事件的具体内容。初稿忽略了这一点,使开头显得比较突兀。

2. 文章中细节描写较少。缺少细节描写的文章读起来淡而无味,不能引起读者的阅读兴趣。应该补充一些场景描写或心里活动的描写,这样可增强文章的可读性。

3. 句子之间的连贯性较差。句型以简单句为主,句子之间关系较松散。应对简单句进行合并,使用连接词或短语来加强句子之间的逻辑关系。

●成稿:

I had one of the most unforgettable experiences in my life a few months ago. There was a big earthquake in Sichuan, the province where I live.

When it happened, I was having an English class with my classmates. Suddenly, everything around us began to shake violently. We were too scared to move. Then the roof began to fall. I felt someone pushing me and I tried my best to run out of the classroom. Luckily, we all got out of the classroom and only a few people got hurt.

After the earthquake, with the help of the government and many warm-hearted people, we set up many tents to live in and received a lot of food from around our country. I will never forget the terrible experience and all of the enthusiastic help that we received from our brothers and sisters around the country.

●Powerful sentences:

1. My most unforgettable experience has been fresh in my mind since the day it happened.

2. Those things happened long ago but they are still fresh in my mind. It was really an

unforgettable experience for me.

3. It was an unforgettable travel experience. We had so much fun.

●巩固练习:

假如你叫李敏,刚收到你的美国笔友Wendy写来的一封信。信中告诉了你一些她暑假时的难忘经历,并且询问你的暑假过得怎么样。请你给她写一封信,向她讲述你暑假期间的一次难忘经历。词数120左右。

第4期巩固练习参考范文:

Dear Wendy,

How have you been these days? I am glad to know that you had a wonderful summer vacation. I had an unforgettable experience during my summer vacation, too.

I went to Sea World Park with my friends. We had a great time there. First we went to the jellyfish lake. There were hundreds of jellyfish. Some of them looked very cute and soft. Then we went to see the dolphins. We even got to touch them and swim with them! It was amazing. After that, we went to see the sharks. At the beginning, I was very scared because all of the sharks rushed towards us. I was afraid that they would eat me, but, in fact, the sharks were only rushing

towards the fish which our guide had prepared. We were safe. It was my first time to see sharks from so close. It was exciting. It was a fun and unforgettable trip! If you have time, you should go there too. I’m sure you’ll love it.

Yours,

Li Min

71. The Sea

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你校将于下周五组织全体师生去海洋公园参观,现请你根据以下表格内容,写一份英文通知,张贴在布告栏中。

英语写作指导及范文

写作要求:

1. 内容完整,语句连贯;

2. 词数:80-100。

写作分析:

本次写作任务要求写一个通知,属应用文体裁。通知一般有两种写法,一种是通过书信的形式,发给有关人员,这种通知的写作形式与普通书信类似,只须写明通知的具体内容即可,由于书信的写法同学们已经很清楚了,因此这里将重点介绍通知的第二种写法,即以布告的形式把事情通知给有关人员,如学生、观众等。通知的标题Notice 要大写,位于正中央,文章一般不必写称呼语和结束语。发布通知的单位或组织名称写在正文的右下角。通知的内容一般包括几个基本信息,如活动的目的、组织者、活动的时间、地点和参加者等。通知一般要先交代通知的目的,即要说明出于什么目的某单位组织了什么活动,邀请何人参加。然后具体说明一些必要的时间、地点以及注意事项等。通知重点在于向公众发布一个消息,因此语言须做到准确全面、言简意赅,只要将基本信息交代清楚即可,一般不会有叙述或描写性的语言。 本次写作任务是发布一个参观活动的通知,同学们应该首先说明组织参观的目的,组织者是谁,参与者都有哪些人,以使看到通知的人对参观活动有一个大致的了解。接下来应该具体说明参观活动的时间、地点、具体安排以及特别的注意事项,细节的说明使通知更有可行性。但需要注意的是,在写通知的时候切忌逐条翻译表格中的内容。在人称的使用方面,发通知的单位和被通知的对象应使用第三人称。

初稿:

Notice

Next Friday, all the teachers and students including American exchange students will visit the aquarium. We will get together at the school gate at nine o’clock in the morning. We will take three buses and spend one hour to get to the aquarium.

The aim of this visit is to enrich the knowledge on the sea environment. The aquarium is very interesting. You can see lots of sea animals there. Through this visit, every teacher and student are expected to have a closer understanding of the sea.

The Students’Union

April 30th, 2009

教师点评:

初稿连贯通顺,基本无语法错误,但在内容结构方面存在一些明显的错误。首先,通知没有说明活动的目的,使得通知的意图性不强。应将第二段的参观目的调整至第一段。此外,活动的具体内容和注意事项应在通知的第二段中有所体现,但初稿作者并没有言明。整封通知读下来,让人觉得信息量不够,不知此次活动究竟有何安排。在语言表达方面,文章第二段对水族馆的描述是没有必要的,师生通过参观能收获些什么也无需在通知中体现,可以删去。 成稿:

Notice

To enrich students’knowledge on the sea and to draw students and teachers’attention to environmental problems with the sea, the Students’Union will organize a trip with all the teachers and students including exchange students from America to visit the aquarium next Friday.

The visit will begin at 9 a.m. and end at 4 p.m.. Everyone should gather at the school gate at 9 o’clock in the morning, and then we will go by bus. There will be a speech about the sea and a sea animal show at the aquarium during our visit. Everyone please arrive on time.

The Students’Union

April 30th, 2009

教师点评:

经过修改后的成稿语言简洁、结构合理、内容完整,是一篇优秀的通知范文。通知首先交代了此次活动的目的和组织者,在第二段细致说明了参观的时间、地点和注意事项,整个通知读下来内容充实、结构紧凑。在语言方面,成稿作者通过陈述句和祈使句的使用,令通知读起来简明扼要,如"Everyone should gather at the school gate ..."和"Everyone please arrive on time." Powerful Sentences:

1. We will have a party in our classroom this Friday.

2. All of you are expected to be there on time.

3. We will invite some American students / teachers / parents to join us.

4. All the teachers and students are requested to meet at the conference room on Friday at 2 p.m. to discuss how to welcome the American exchange student.

5. Please bring your pens and notebooks with you.

巩固练习:

假设你参加了你市举办的"中学生海洋知识竞赛"活动,请你写一篇英文日记记叙本次活动,并谈谈自己的感受。词数:120左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

April 30th Friday Sunny

This morning I took part in the Sea Knowledge Contest held in our School Hall. I learnt a lot about the sea. All the contestants were divided into four groups, and I was in the first group. I answered three questions. The first two were quite easy, but the third one was difficult, which was about the sea environment. Although I didn’t win the first prize, I received a toy dolphin as a gift. I thought that this experience would benefit me a lot. Through this contest, I not only enriched my knowledge about marine life, but also learnt a lot about the sea environment. I strongly believe that all of us should do whatever we can to protect the sea environment.

72. The World of Our Senses

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你是李华,近日在一份英语报纸上看到这样一则新闻:一个人自发创建免费盲人影院,每天精心挑选影片,为盲人讲解电影,受到盲人的喜爱。消息传开后,很多好心人都加入到为盲人服务的志愿者队伍中来。

请你给该报社写一封信发表你对此事的看法,并呼吁社会给予残疾人更多的关注。(词数:120左右)参考词汇:志愿者volunteer n.

写作分析:

1. 文章是书信体,应该注意英语书信的写作格式。内容以议论为主,叙述为辅。

2. 文章可分为两部分。第一部分为点题部分,从叙述中引出主题。第二部分是议论部分,阐述主题。

3. 注意文章的逻辑关系,适当地运用一些表示转折和并列的连接词。

初稿:

Dear editors,

Yesterday I read a piece of news in the newspaper. I learned that a man set up a free cinema for blind people. He picked films every day and described the films to the blind people. It has such a good comment that more and more volunteers take part in it. I think the man sets an example for a warm society, in which people should care for each other. Blind people want to watch movies like us. The warm-hearted man who set up the cinema really knew their feelings. He showed them the world in another way. He became their eyes. Society is a big family in which people should share with others. Let’s give our hands to disabled people to let them feel our love.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

初稿内容完整,叙述基本清楚,但仍然存在一些不足之处:

1. 叙述部分用了太多篇幅,造成文章主题不鲜明。

2. 没有运用表示转折或并列的词语,使文章缺乏连贯性和层次感。

成稿:

Dear editors,

Yesterday, I read in your paper that a man set up a free theatre for the blind, in which he "told" movies that he picked for them every day. It was thought highly of and attracted many volunteers. I think that he has set a good example to us on how to make a friendlier society, in which people take care of each other. Blind people can’t enjoy their lives in the same way as we do, even though they would like to. A society is like a big family, so we need to take care of each other. Those people deserve our attention, and it is also our duty to help them. Unfortunately, what we have done is far from enough. I hope that more and more warm-hearted people try to understand their feelings and help them "see" how beautiful our society is.

Yours,

Li Hua

教师点评:

1. 第一部分叙述比较简洁,开篇点题。

2. 文章连贯性很强,且语言精练:恰当地运用了定语从句:... in which he "told" movies that he had picked for them ...

Powerful Sentences:

1. At present, there is a widespread concern over ...

2. I hope that we can pay more attention to ...

3. It is high time for us to take action to ...

4. It is ... who should take the responsibility.

巩固练习:

假如你是王颖,读完这则新闻后,也想为盲人朋友们贡献自己的一份力量,但不知如何成为此活动的志愿者。为此,请你给该报社写一封自荐信,同时附上自己的简单情况,如年龄、什么时候有时间等。(词数:120左右)(参考范文见下期)上期写作指导参考范文

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear editors,

I am a loyal reader of your newspaper. Last week I read the news about the special theatre for the blind. I was deeply moved by those volunteers. In fact, now I also want to become a volunteer to help the blind. Could you please tell me what I should do? Let me tell you something about myself. I’m a middle school student, and go to school from Monday to Friday. I have to practice the piano on Saturday, so I can only offer my services on Sunday. I believe that I can "tell" movies well, especially movies about music. I’m looking forward to your reply. Best wishes!

Yours,

Wang Ying

73. Tomorrow’s World

写作指导

●写作任务:

你有没有设想过未来的学校生活会是怎样?请以"One Day in Future School"为题写一篇文章,投稿给校刊英文版的"异想天开"栏目。写作要求:

1. 合理发挥想象力;

2. 主题突出、结构完整、详略得当;

3. 语句通顺、上下文连贯、无语法错误;

4. 词数:120左右。

●写作分析:

本次写作任务要求记叙未来学校生活的一天,属于记叙文范畴。记叙文的文章发展要遵循一定的写作顺序来推进,如时间顺序或空间顺序等。本文所要记叙的内容并非一次具体事件,而是对日常生活的概括,因此按照时间的推移来记叙一天的生活是比较合理的写作思路。文章题目将写作话题限定在"未来"这一特定时间,这就要求同学们充分发挥想象力,畅想未来学校的生活情况。

在文章内容结构的安排上,同学们需要注意,尽管题目是"一天"的校园生活,但没有必要将每一时刻的活动安排都一一介绍,否则文章就会变成一篇没有重点的流水账。可以通过描述一天中较为典型的时刻或事件突出未来校园与现实校园不同的特色。想必同学们对于未来的学校生活有着各种各样的期待,未来学校的教学工具有何改变?课程设置有什么不同?或者有没有一些丰富多彩的课外活动? 这些都是同学们可以展开叙述的方面。另外,在文章的结尾部分,应用一两句话概括文章的主旨,起到点题的作用。

●初稿:

One Day in Future School

The technology is developing fast, which will greatly change our school life.

First, our teaching equipment will change and teaching will become more interesting. There will be a computer on each student’s desk. The computer will provide students with the content of their classes. And our teaching method and school activities will be greatly improved. There will be more interesting discussion classes. Our difficulties and problems can be solved when we discuss in class with classmates and teacher. Finally, we will have more colorful activities. For example, we may have a football game with other class in the afternoon, which seems impossible in today’s school life. The future school life will bring us into a wonderful world. We are looking forward to it.

●教师点评:

初稿文章结构清晰、内容完整,无语法错误;文章从教学设施、教学方法和校园生活三个方面说明未来校园的不同之处。但初稿最大的问题在于作者没有认真审题,写作任务要求写一篇记叙文,叙述未来生活的一天,但初稿更像是一篇说明文,介绍了未来学校生活有哪些变化,不符合写作任务的要求,可以说是一篇跑题文章。这点应在成稿中加以改正。

●成稿:

One Day in Future School

As soon as I enter the classroom in the morning, I press the red button on my desk and the computer screen on my desk comes on. After sending my homework to my teacher by email, I begin to read the content of today’s class on the screen. The bell is ringing as the teacher comes in. All the students turn off their screens because today we are going to have a discussion about global warming. This is the second discussion class this week. We all enjoy discussion classes because they are interesting and we can learn a lot from them. During lunch time, I can order my favorite food with the help of a computer. It can also tell me which food is the healthiest. In the afternoon we’ll have a football match with Class 3, which makes me excited the whole morning. This is one day in future school. It will bring us knowledge as well as interesting activities. ●教师点评:

修改后的成稿符合记叙文的写作要求。首先,文章按照时间顺序叙述了"我"在未来学校中的一天的生活,内容完整、主题突出。其次,文章的最后一段用一句话概括了文章的主旨大意,点明未来的学校生活既可以让我们学到知识,又能带来更多的课外活动。最后,成稿中不仅运用了定语从句"In the afternoon we’ll have a football match with Class 3, which makes me excited the whole morning.",还使用了较多的连接词和短语,如"as soon as"和"during lunch time",使文章读起来连贯通顺。

●Powerful Sentences:

1. In the future, people will make use of ... to make their lives easier. 2. People’s lives will be greatly improved with the use of ...

3. As soon as I turn on the computer, I can ...

4. Unlike today, future life will enable us to ...

5. We can save lots of money and energy with the help of ..., which is very different from today.

●巩固练习:

互联网的潜力正在不断地被挖掘出来,它可以为人们的生活带来更多的便利。也许有一天,

人们无需出门,在家就可利用互联网看病求医。现某英文医疗网站正在建设网络就医系统,请你发挥想像力,以"Internet Doctor System"为题写一篇英语短文,谈谈你的新点子。 词数:120左右。

写作要点:

1. 病人可以在电脑上点击感觉不适的身体部位;

2. 对应不同的症状描述找出病因,并在网上自助购药;

3. 只限小病,大病还需去医院。

本期巩固练习参考范文

Internet Doctor System

Due to rapid development in online technology, many people now can save time and money by getting a health check online.

If you have a headache, you can click the head of the person’s body on a computer screen. Then the screen will show different feelings your headache might cause. According to your situation, the computer will tell you the reason for your illness. After the examination, you will be able to go to the online drugstore to buy medicine for yourself. The Internet Doctor System makes our lives easier. However, if you have a serious illness or problem, you should go to see your doctor.

74. Tomorrow’s World

写作指导

写作任务:

假如你是李丽,你将代表你们学校参加20xx年国际中学生文化交流节,活动的主题是"未来在我们手中"。请你发挥自己的想象力拟一份关于月球旅游的报告。报告中要写明月球旅游的内容以及它会给人们带来什么感受。可参考以下信息:

目前月球的环形山中,共有五座以中国人的名字命名的,它们是石申环形山、张衡环形山、祖冲之环形山、郭守敬环形山和万户环形山。科学家建议进行一次登月旅行,到月球上的巨大的陨石坑中收集岩石样本,来研究月球上未知生命的痕迹。

参考词汇:

环形山ring mountain n.

陨石坑cloud stone pit n.

写作分析:

写作任务是以"月球旅游"为主题,对未来进行设想,是一篇开放性作文。

要求学生充分发挥自己的想象力,写作时可以有选择地使用一些参考资料。文章共分为两个部分,分别写月球旅游的内容和感受。两个部分要衔接流畅,逻辑严谨。

文章所使用的时态应为一般将来时。人称以第一人称为宜。

初稿:

My dear friends,

Tourism is developing very fast, and I am sure that in future the spaceship will manage to send people to have a travel on the moon. There are five ring mountains named after Chinese people, such as Zhang Heng ring mountain, Zu Chongzhi ring mountain, and so on. So we are certain to travel there. Besides, we will visit the huge cloud stone pit to take some stones so that we can study the unknown life on the moon. It is certain that moon travel will be very exciting. Besides, it must be very helpful for human beings to know more about the moon and the universe,

and it may help us build our future home there. That’s all. Thank you.

教师点评:

本篇短文基本覆盖了写作任务要求的内容,写出了月球旅游的内容和感受。所使用的词汇和语法结构也基本能满足写作要求。但仍存在一些不足:1. 文章的开头部分有些唐突,缺少过渡性话语。2. 在旅游内容方面,没有适当地发挥,所以使得文章的内容不太充实。 成稿:

My dear friends,

I believe that one day human beings will travel to the moon in spaceships just as easily as we fly to other countries now. On the moon, people in space suits will climb mountains, and enjoy the beautiful full view of the earth. Tour guides will take us to see cloud stone pits which may give us some clues of the origins of life. People will also be able to visit Guanghan Palace, and meet Chang’e and her rabbit, just like in the Chinese fairy tale. Traveling to the moon will be very exciting. It will also help us learn more about the moon and the universe. After we learn more about the moon, it will be possible for us to build homes on the moon too. That’s all. Thank you. 教师点评:

此文结构清晰,想象合理,内容充实,所使用的语法结构准确自然。对旅游内容进行了适当发挥。我们从小常听嫦娥玉兔的故事,中国的嫦娥一号又成功登月,这些都可以是我们写作灵感的源泉,使文章更加生动。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Because of the rapid development of technology, our world will change a lot in many ways in the future.

2. To our great joy, it is now getting easier for us to travel outside of the earth and go to places such as the moon.

3. What will the world be like in the future? We can only guess, but we can be sure that it will be much different from what it is today.

4. Scientists are finding new ways to make houses for us to live in.

5. Many changes are on the way for people in the near future.

巩固练习:

假如你是英国的中学生Lucy,你每天看到妈妈在厨房里忙碌的身影,觉得她很辛苦。于是你想象如果有一台能做饭的机器送给妈妈那该多好。请你给妈妈写一封信,把你的愿望告诉她。

本期写作指导参考范文

Dear Mum,

Thank you for loving and supporting me. I feel very happy to see you at home when I come back after school every day. At the same time I often feel sorry when I see you cooking and doing other housework. You must be tired. How I wish I could invent a cooking machine and give it to you as a gift!This machine would cook all kinds of delicious food. All you would need to do is buy all of the things that are needed for the dish and then tell it how to cook the meal. In that way, cooking will be very easy and relaxing and you will never be tired again. Then you will have more time to be with us. Wouldn’t that be great? I’m sure it will happen one day.

Your daughter, Lucy

75. Traffic and Transportation

写作指导

写作任务:

口语课上外教给大家展示了如下这幅图片,请你写一篇英语短文描述该图片所反映的问题,并发表自己的看法作为口语课的发言稿。词数:120左右。

写作要求:

1. 内容完整,主题突出;

2. 通顺连贯,衔接自然;

3. 无语法错误。参考词汇:

过街天桥street flyover

写作分析:

本次写作任务为开放式作文,要求根据图片,描述所反映问题并发表自己的观点。因此文章既有对图片的描述,也需对问题发表自己的看法,属于夹叙夹议体裁的文章写作。开放式作文需要同学们根据主题和写作要点,合理地发挥想像进行写作。因此,要想写好开放式作文,首先需要明确文章的主题,这需要认真观察题目给出的图片,再根据主题搭建文章结构,令文章主题明确、内容完整、结构清晰。

本次的写作话题围绕着城市交通展开,这幅图片描绘了城市中心商业区交通混乱的景象,在图片中,我们可以发现路人很少使用过街天桥,而是横穿马路,造成交通秩序混乱,同时也带来了安全隐患,这些都是同学们要对图片进行具体描述的方面,即文章中"叙"的部分。然后,应根据图片描绘的内容,并结合文章主题,合理地发表自己的看法,即文章中"议"的部分。这部分并没有固定的参考模式,同学们可以联系实际生活说说自己的看法,比如人们应为了自身和他人的安全遵守交通规则,加强繁华商业区的交通管理等等。由于是夹叙夹议体裁的文章写作,议论是在对图片的描述后自然而然产生的观点抒发,因此,文章的重点应放在对图片的描述上,议论部分放在描述部分后,起到点明主题、画龙点睛的作用。

初稿:

The traffic jam was very serious in downtown during holidays. In order to reduce the traffic jam, many street flyovers have been built in the busy streets. But many people didn’t obey the traffic rules. They crossed the street directly instead of using the street flyover, because they thought it was more convenient. Cars have to stop frequently to prevent running into the crowd. As a result, the traffic jam often takes place in the street, especially during holidays. I think, for our and other’s safety, it is very important for everyone to obey the traffic rules. Morever, I hope the traffic can be instructed by the police in downtown.

教师点评:

初稿能够描述图片内容并发表自己的看法,语句通顺,可以说基本完成了写作任务的要求。不足之处在于,文章开篇没有交代写作背景,直接描述交通状况让人感到茫然。另外,初稿文章对交通状况的描写太过笼统,不够具体,如"The traffic jam was very serious in downtown during holidays."与后面的"... the traffic jam often takes place in the street, especially during holidays."无论从内容上还是用词上都出现一定的重复,这也是同学们在写作过程中最容易出现的问题,描写大而空,不够具体。此外,初稿时态混乱,一般过去时与一般现在时交替使用,由于是描述图片内容,因此,文章应采用一般现在时。

成稿:

This picture shows the traffic condition of our city.

During the holidays, the city is filled with cars. Although street flyovers have been built in many streets, few people use them. They still cross roads instead of walking the flyovers. Cars have to move slowly or even stop to avoid running over people. What’s worse, some parents even

take their young children while crossing the streets, which really sets a bad example. I think, for our own and other’s safety, it is very important for everyone to obey the traffic rules. It may be less convenient to use a street flyover, but it is safer. Furthermore, I think that the government should take measures to educate the public on the importance of obeying traffic rules.

教师点评:

经过修改后的成稿结构更加清晰,内容更加充实,初稿中描写不够具体的缺点得以改正,不仅写到了司机,也写到了行人,细致具体,议论部分谈到遵守交通规则的重要性,并提出自己的合理建议。整篇文章读下来通顺连贯、浑然一体。另外在语言方面,成稿中使用了定语从句"... some parents even take their young children while crossing the streets, which really sets a bad example."及"What’s worse"和"Furthermore"表示衔接的短语,使表达更加连贯。

Powerful Sentences:

1. Today, in big cities, like Beijing and Guangzhou, private cars have become popular as means of transportation.

2. Although the police are often busy directing the traffic, almost all roads are crowded because there are too many cars on them.

3. I believe, for your own and other’s safety, it is very important that everyone should obey the traffic rules because safety is everyone’s business.

4. Effective measures should be taken before things get worse.

5. Quite a few people behave as if there are no traffic rules at all. They cross roads wherever they like, even though there is zebra-crossing line just a few yards away.

巩固练习:

假如今早你因为交通堵塞上学迟到了,请你写一篇日记记叙上学路上发生的事,并谈谈自己的感受。词数:120左右。

本期巩固练习参考范文

Monday May 14, 2009 Cloudy

This morning I was late for school because I became caught in a serious traffic jam on my way to school. The traffic jam was caused by an accident. A girl was hit by a bus while she was crossing the road. She was in a hurry and ran a red light. Just as she was crossing, a bus turned into her bike. It was too late for her to stop her bike so she was knocked over. She hurt her leg very badly.

I think that this accident is a good lesson for all of us. It tells us the importance of obeying the traffic rules even when we are in a hurry.

76. Travel

写作指导

●写作任务:

假如你是李华,最近你们班组织了一次秋游,请你根据以下表格提示的信息给你的美国笔友Peter写一封信,向他介绍你的游览经历。学校秋游的具体信息如下:

英语写作指导及范文

英语写作指导及范文

要求:

1. 词数:110左右;

2. 可以适当补充细节;

3. 参考词汇:古建筑群ancient architecture group 白塔White Tower 九龙壁Nine Dragon Wall ●分析:

1. 本次写作任务要求以信件形式描述一次秋游活动,信件正文属于记叙文。表格中的信息包含了记叙文的基本要点,在写作中不应遗漏。另外,游记题材的记叙文不能仅仅是对游览路线的介绍,否则就会变成流水帐。主要景点的描写及个人感情的抒发应该成为游记类记叙文的重点和亮点。

2. 文章可分为三部分:第一部分,在与对方进行简单的寒暄后,简要介绍一下这次秋游的时间、地点和总体感受。第二部分,详细描述这次秋游的活动内容,比如参观了哪些景点,参加了什么活动等。为了使文章条理分明,对景点的描述也必须依据一定的顺序,即先游览的先写,后游览的后写;著名的景点多写,普通的景点少写甚至不写。这样,文章才能体现一定的层次,描写才可能更加出彩。最后,总结这次秋游活动,并简要描述秋游感受。也可以用询问对方的一次难忘的游览经历的方式来结束信件,与对方产生互动。

●初稿:

Dear Peter,

My classmates, teachers, and I went to Beihai Park. It was a lot of fun and we really enjoyed ourselves.

We went there by bus. Once we were all there, we took pictures in front of the park. Then we went inside. First, we went to see the beautiful White Tower, which was built at the top of the hill. It looks like a giant bell. We took pictures there. Then we went to see the Nine Dragon Wall, which has all kinds of dragons carved into it. We took pictures there, too. Finally, we went boating on the lake in the park.

What do you think of our trip?

Looking forward to your reply!

Yours,

Li Hua

●教师点评:

这篇初稿遵循了信件的基本格式,并且介绍了这次秋游活动的地点、人物、观赏景点和参加的活动等,包含了材料中给出的大部分信息,但初稿仍存在几点明显的缺陷:

1. 文章遗漏了一项基本信息:游览的时间。

2. 对游览过程的介绍过于松散,读起来像流水帐,景点之间没有衔接,并且忽略了自己在这次秋游中的感受。整段读起来只有死板的介绍,不能引起对方的阅读兴趣。建议使用连接词来提示景点的转换,加强句子之间的联系。对主要景点要进行细节描写。

3. 句型结构枯燥单一,句子重复使用严重。比如,文中"we took pictures"出现了三次。对于这样的信息,我们可以选择用总结的语句来表达。对简单句进行合并,利用并列句、复合句、介词短语等增加句式的变化。

●成稿:

Dear Peter,

How are you these days?

Last Sunday, my classmates, teachers, and I went to Beihai Park. It was a lot of fun and we really enjoyed ourselves.

We went there by bus. Once we were all there, we took pictures in front of the park. Then we went inside. First, we went to see the beautiful White Tower, which was built at the top of the hill. It looks like a giant bell. We took a lot of pictures there because the scenery from the top of the hill is really beautiful. Then we went to see the Nine Dragon Wall, which has all kinds of dragons carved into it. It is a really interesting-looking wall. Finally, we went boating on the lake in the park, which was a lot of fun.

What do you think of our trip?

Looking forward to your reply!

Yours,

Li Hua

●Powerful sentences:

1. It was a fantastic trip that I will never forget.

2. I hope I will have more chances to enjoy trips like that in the future.

3. We had a great time not just because of the beautiful scenery, but also because the

activities we had there were really fun.

4. We all enjoyed ourselves on this lovely trip, and we sang all the way.

●巩固练习:

假如你是你们学校英文报的小记者,请你为你们学校附近的旅游景点——古庙独乐寺写一篇简短的英文介绍,向来你们学校参观的外国中学生朋友介绍一下这座千年古寺。古寺的基本信息如下:

独乐寺坐落于天津蓟县,始建于唐代,重建于辽,距今已有1000余年的历史。据说安禄山叛唐,就是在此处誓师,他喜独乐,因此得名。

观音阁高23米,木质,集我国木结构建筑之大成,是国内现存最早的木结构楼阁。阁内有一座高达16.27米的观音菩萨像,是辽代泥塑艺术珍品,又是国内最大的观音塑像。为显示观音法力高强,塑造者在观音头顶上又塑出10个小观音头,所以又有"十一面观音"之称。

要求:

1. 词数:110左右;

2. 参考词汇:独乐寺Temple of Solitary Joy观音阁Avalokitesvara Pavilion

第3期巩固练习参考范文:

Temple of Solitary Joy

The Temple of Solitary Joy is located in Ji County, Tianjin. It was first built in the Tang Dynasty and it has stood undamaged for more than a thousand years of rain, snow, wind, and frost.

When you enter the temple, the first thing you see is a 10-metre-tall gate, which has the name of the temple written on it. After passing through the gate, you come to the main building —the Avalokitesvara Pavilion, which is 23 meters tall. You will see the huge Avalokitesvara Statue standing at the centre of the pavilion. If you stand beside it, you will see how big it is. A person is only as tall as the ankle of the statue. The Statue, 16.27 meters in height, is the biggest clay sculpture of Avalokitesvara in China. On the crown of the head of Avalokitesvara, there are 10 small Avalokitesvara heads, so these are called the 11 faces Avalokitesvara.

77. Travel

写作任务:

假如你的学校正在举行一场英语演讲比赛,请你拟一篇关于"北京欢迎你"的演讲稿,向外国友人介绍长城,天安门广场,和颐和园三个景点。并邀请外国友人来北京旅游。(词数:不少于120)

写作分析:

1. 根据写作任务可知本文要求大家写一篇介绍北京的说明文,文章的主要时态为一般现在时。

2. 本文写作时可分为三大部分。第一部分为写作目的,欢迎国外朋友来北京,引出介绍北京的话题;第二部分介绍北京的三个著名景点:长城、天安门广场和颐和园;第三部分概括总结,紧扣文章中心"北京欢迎你"。

3. 第二部分可参照如下信息:

(1)长城:始建于2500年前;毛主席题词"不到长城非好汉"。

(2)天安门广场:世界最大的广场,广场 四周建筑有大会堂、博物馆、毛主席纪念堂等。

(3)颐和园:北京著名公园,坐落于北京东北部。

参考词汇:

天安门广场Tian’anmen Square;

颐和园the Summer Palace

初稿:

Welcome to China! Welcome to Beijing! Let me introduce some famous sights to you.

The Great Wall is an amazing sight. It was built 2,500 years ago. Chairman Mao once said, "He who does not reach the Great Wall is not a true man." There are some other spots, like Tian’anmen Square and the Summer Palace. Tian’anmen Square is one of the largest and oldest public squares in the world. Around it are halls, museums and monuments. Mao’s body rests in the Maozedong Memorial Hall. The Summer Palace is one of the best parks in the city, and lies in the northeast of the city. You can go there by bus or by car. There are many things to see in Beijing. I’m sure you will enjoy them all.

教师点评:

1. 初稿的优点:对文章的要点把握比较准确,文章的体裁及格式准确。

2. 不足之处在于文章的第一段和最后一段过于简单,因此难以激起读者了解北京的兴趣。

3. 在第二段的要点陈述中所运用的都是简单句,句型单调不够灵活,要点转换尤显生硬。 成稿:

Have you been to China? Have you been to Beijing? There are many cultural and natural sights in Beijing. The first place that you must visit is the Great Wall —a very beautiful place. It was built 2,500 years ago. As we all know, Chairman Mao once said, "He who does not reach the Great Wall is not a true man."

Next, let me tell you about Tian’anmen Square, the largest public square in the world. It was built as early as in 1651. Around it are halls, museums and monuments, including the Maozedong Memorial Hall, where Mao’s body rests.

The Summer Palace, one of the best parks in the city, is a favorite among tourists for sightseeing in Beijing. It is in the northeast part of the city. You may take a taxi or bus to get there.

There are also many other places to visit in Beijing. I’m sure you will enjoy them all.

教师点评:

1. 首尾呼应,画龙点睛。第一段提出了"Have you been to China? Have you been to Beijing?"的问题。而最后一段对文章概括之后,用一句"I’m sure you will enjoy them all."和第一段遥相呼

应,使整篇文章给读者以浑然一体之感。

2. 作者分三段来分别描写三个景点,层次分明,一目了然。

3. 更难能可贵的是使用了较为复杂的句型,例如定语从句和状语从句,并且逻辑关系表达准确。

Powerful Sentences:

1. I still remember my first trip to Beijing last year as if it were yesterday.

2. People in Beijing like morning markets, where they can get many kinds of delicious foods.

3. With the coming of the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games, more and more foreigners want to find out more about Beijing.

4. It is a dream for me to visit Beijing.

5. The Great Wall is actually over 6,000 kilometers long, 6 to 7 meters tall and 4 to 5 meters wide.

6. Every year many visitors from all over the world come to China to visit Beijing.

巩固练习:

你们班即将进行"热爱家乡"的英语主题班会,请你写一篇小短文来介绍你的家乡,并邀请你的同学们前去游玩。你的家乡在发展特色旅游,如举办篝火晚会,教做风味小吃等活动。(词数:120左右)参考词汇:篝火bonfire

本期写作指导参考范文

I love my hometown, which is located by the Yellow River. In the last five years, it has changed a lot by developing the tourism market. Its beautiful scenery is a big attraction for many people. To make the attraction stronger, we have decided to add some features to it. In the daytime tourists can learn about our food culture by taking part in a course to learn how to make our special food. At night there is a big bonfire party where tourists and local people can dance and sing happily together. I am sure there will be many other interesting activities there soon, too. You are all welcome to visit my hometown. I’m sure you will have a good time there.

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