优秀SAT写作范文赏析

优秀SAT写作范文赏析

为了帮助大家备考SAT写作,小编今天为大家搜集整理了一篇优秀的SAT作文,大家要知道,优秀的写作首先要文章整体轮廓清晰,首尾最不能忽视,表达的内容要简单精确,一般分三到四段为好;其次字数要适中,虽然SAT作文没有字数的限制,但四百左右为好,太短的文章不能够说明问题;最后就是文章内容要有论点有论据,例证要恰当。

Do we need other people in order to understand ourselves?

Most parents and teachers tell students the extremely tired cliché of the consequences of following the crowd. It is said that, in order to be a competely individual thinker, one must ignore what others say. Such advice is certainly true to some extent; unreasonable malice must be forgotten in order to keep some level of self-esteem. However, as with most ideas, this one can not be taken in absolute form. In at least some respects, we need other people in order to understand ourselves.

An excellent example of a literary character who could have psychologically benefitted from social interaction is J. Alfred Prufrock from T.S. Eliot’s poem “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.” In the poem, Prufrck desires a relationship with a woman very much, but he refrains from initiating conversation because he fears that he could not hold the interest of a sophisticated lady. Should Prufrock have taken the step to accept other people into his life, he most likely would have discovered, as the reader of the poem certainly did, that he is most articulate. Others would have impressed upon him the beauty of his words and his talent for prose. If Prufrock would have spoken his song a loud, the ladies surely would have shown him what he himself did not understand. Since the ladies would reveal Prufrock’s talents to him, it is true that we need others in order to understand ourselves.SAT

The lesson of learning from other’s opinions of yourself extends much farther than the song of a fictional character. Two days ago, in an art class, my group of students had assigned self portraits due. Most of us brought in photographs of ourselves. Nevertheless, one boy brought nothing and handed us all slips of paper. He told us to write a word to describe him, and when we had done so, he pasted the

words on a poster. This must have been a revealing exercise for him because, upon the sight of such descriptions as “bitter” and “sarcastic”, he was shocked. In the case of this boy, he had not realized how his personality appeared to others. Though he might not have thought himself “bitter”, his friend’s comments certainly made him seem that way. The fact that we need others in order to understand ourselves is clearly shown by this boy’s revelation.(389)

大家觉得这篇作文是不是有优秀呢,收尾表达明确,内容清晰明了,段落及字数都达到标准水平,希望大家能够参照此文章,顺利考取SAT写作高分,最后预祝大家在SAT写作中取得好成绩!(来源:.cn/)

 

第二篇:SAT写作范文

Abraham Lincoln said, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." In other words, our personal level of satisfaction is entirely within our control. Otherwise, why would the same experience disappoint one person but delight another? Happiness is not an accident but a choice.

Assignment: Is happiness something over which people have no control, or can people choose to be happy? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.

My Essay:

Happiness is an elixir to all diseases, so everyone wants happiness and most of them think that it comes from success. But even if we fail something, we can still choose to be happy.

Last year, our school held a basketball competition. Our class had entered into the semi-final and all the students in our class were very excited. Moreover, we had just beaten the team which was considered the best in our grade and my classmates were hopeful that we might enter the final game. On the day of the semi-final, the players of our team went to the field in our cheers. But as soon as we saw the members of the other team, we knew it would be a hard match. One of the players in their team is as tall as 1.93 m, much taller than any of our players and we also learned that their team was the only one which hadn’t lost a single game.

The match started. To our disappointment, our team wasn’t playing well, and the best player in our team was followed by the tallest in theirs at every pace. Anxious and worried, we girls jumped onto the platform beside and shouted at the top of our voices. After sometime, it seemed that our cheers had gave my classmates some energy and they began to catch up, slowly but gradually, we were only two points behind. But just at that time, the first ten minutes were over and we came to a stop. The players were tired but hopeful, and we kept cheering them. However, when the match started again, our opponents seemed to become stronger. They got more points and we were soon eleven points behind. Meanwhile, our throats were burning, but we kept shouting for our classmates. Though we caught up some points, at last we lost by only one point.

When we got back to the classroom, all of my classmates were disappointed and sad. One of the players even cried. But our teacher came in at that moment and said, “Cheer up everyone, we just lost by one point and we are already the top four. We still have a match and let’s get the third place!” Then one of my classmates suddenly went to the dais and wrote something encouraging on the blackboard and one by one, over ten of our classmates all wrote down the words they wanted to say. All of us were greatly encouraged and smiled. We felt a sense of happiness even though we didn’t win.

So if we choose to be happy, we’ll be happy. It’s all up to our choices.

The Official SAT Study Guide Avail Practice Test 3

Prompt

Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and

assignment below.

A mistakenly cynical view of human behavior holds that people are primarily driven by selfish motives: the desire for wealth, for power, or for fame. Yet history gives us many examples of individuals who have sacrificed their own welfare for a cause or a principle that they regarded as more important than their own lives. Conscience - that powerful inner voice that tells us what is right and what is wrong-can be a more compelling force than money, power, or fame.

Assignment

Is conscience a more powerful motivator than money, fame, or power? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your readings, studies, experience, and observations.

SAT Sample Essay - Score of 6 SAT作文6分范文

As society toils onward into its dreams of the future, the progress that accompanies this movement may be tainted by individual motives of avarice. However, as seen in various fields such as art, history, and science, the human conscience will limit the motivation of greed and inspire good works for the sake of morality. One’s sense of right and wrong forever impels one to be a decent, thoughtful person.

Such people widely populate the idealistic field of literature. Though novels may be rife with villainous, self-serving characters, only the heroic and moral personas emerge triumphant. For example, the well-known literary character

Huckleberry Finn, from Twain’s Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, rescinds his claim to a sizable fortune if possessing such wealth would diminish his safety. Furthermore, Huck will risk himself to ensure the security of his close comrade Jim. His loyalty, a facet of one’s conscience, compels him to sacrifice his safety to ensure the well-being of others, which is more than money has accomplished in motivating Huck. Thus, a person, however fictional, considers the rewards of acting on conscience to be more fruitful than to be possessed by greed.

Although such characters are fictional, the same motives of charity and morality have inspired numerous people in history to set aside their desires. Lyndon B. Johnson, Former President of the United States, pushed the Civil Rights Act of 1964 through Congress motivated by conscience and a desire to correct the immorality of racism in society. Though some Senators stridently opposed such a bill, the power

of motivation by conscience impassioned Johnson to strive even harder to remain loyal to the American precepts of equality. Such is fruition of conscientious actions.

Though the great figures of history seem out of reach in their stature, as an individual I am faced with moral dilemmas rather often. For example, I have been offered more weighty positions on the newspaper, but as a rule, I have always refused when there was someone better qualified than I. Consequently, their talents result in a more improved issue, thereby increasing the benefit for all.

There in lies the reason why we are compelled by conscience. Money, fame and power are fleeting and insubstantial, for they can never mend the integrity

sacrificed to obtain them. It is only when we act in the name of what is right that all of our possible talents may benefit ourselves, our peers, and our ideals.

Score Explanation SAT写作6分范文点评

This response demonstrates clear and consistent mastery. The writer effectively and insightfully develops the point of view that "the human conscience will limit the motivation of greed and inspire good works for the sake of morality." By focusing on fictional, historical, and personal examples of conscience as a compelling force, the writer demonstrates outstanding critical thinking. The first example is the fictional character of Huckleberry Finn, whose "loyalty, a facet of one's conscience, compels him to sacrifice his safety to ensure the well-being of others." The writer then moves to the historical figure Lyndon B. Johnson, who "pushed the Civil Rights Act of 1964 through Congress motivated by conscience and a desire to correct the immorality of racism in society." Finally, the writer offers the personal example of declining "more weighty positions on the newspaper . . . when there was someone better qualified." This essay organizes these clearly appropriate examples well, demonstrating clear coherence and a smooth progression of ideas. The essay exhibits skillful use of language and demonstrates meaningful variety in sentence structure ("Money, fame, and power are fleeting and insubstantial, for they can never mend the integrity sacrificed to obtain them. It is only when we act in the name of what is right that all of our possible talents may benefit ourselves, our peers, and our ideals"). Thus, this outstanding essay receives a score of 6.

The Official SAT Study Guide Avail Practice Test 2

Prompt

Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and

assignment below.

Technology promises to make our lives easier, freeing up time for leisure pursuits. But the rapid pace of technological innovation and the split second processing capabilities of computers that can work virtually nonstop have made all

of us feel rushed. We have adopted the relentless pace of the very machines that were supposed to simplify our lives, with the result that , whether at work or play, people do not feel like their lives have changed for the better.

Adapted from Karen Finucan, "Life in the Fast Lane"

Assignment

Do changes that make our lives easier not necessarily make them better? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your readings, studies, experience, and observations.

Sample Essay - Score of 6 SAT写作6分范文

Throughout time mankind has strived to make his life easier. Whether it be through technology, science, or theories of social interaction every generation has made one contribution. From the idea of crop rotation to the cellular telephone mankind has advanced. It can be argued however, that not all of these advancements were beneficial. Many times people are accused of “taking the easy way out”, something that is looked down upon in today’s society.

Consider, if you will, ancient Greecian Society. With hardly any of the technological or scientific advancements we have today, they were able to produce some of the greatest thinkers of all time. Socrates and Plato still influence modern philosophical thought. In addition, these men were well versed in all disciplines. They were thinkers, mathematicians, writers, scientists, artists and much more. Examine some other great men in history. Leonardo Davinci was one of the greatest scientists and also one of the greatest artists of all time, he even invented and drew up early plans for the helicopter. These ancient men, without the technology and ease of life we have today, were able to produce some of the most prolific additions to human knowledge ever.

Now let us examine some men from our time. Bill Gates, while adding immensely to the pleasures and ease of man’s life, did so only by forcefully destroying many fledgling companies and completely undermining our capitalistic market place. Very few men in our time are leaders in more than one discipline. There are no

scientists/artists or writer/mathematicians. Men, while being able to more deeply delve into a discipline, are now restricted to it. I attribute this to technology. We now have a life outside of our work. A life with computers, cars, movies, and dinner with the family from across the country. Mankind can no longer devote himself to his work. He has his work life, and his home life. While a cell phone allows me to talk to anyone from anywhere, it prevents me from being alone and fully

concentrating. While the internet allows me to look at websites from around the world, it prevents me from doing the work I set out to do.

While technology and science have made man’s life easier, they have not made it better. Man has become less productive and less devoted, partly, as a result of this newfound ease of life. Therefore, What makes our lives easier does not necessarily make them better.

Score Explanation SAT写作6分范文点评

This outstanding essay insightfully and effectively develops the point of view that “What makes our lives easier does not necessarily make them better.” The writer demonstrates outstanding critical thinking by focusing on clearly appropriate examples throughout history to support the idea that not all of

mankind’s “advancements” to make life easier have been “beneficial.” The essay begins by describing the ancient scholars who, “without the technology and ease of life we have today, were able to produce some of the most prolific additions to human knowledge ever.” The writer continues by offering the idea that today, due to the incredible advancements in technology, “Very very few men . . . are leaders in more than one discipline.” The essay concludes with the idea that, due to the distractions and ease of a technologically advanced society, “Man has become less productive and less devoted.” This well organized and clearly focused essay demonstrates coherence and progression of ideas. The essay consistently exhibits skillful use of language and demonstrates meaningful variety in sentence structure (“Bill Gates, while adding immensely to the pleasures and ease of man’s life, did so only by forcefully destroying many fledgling companies and completely undermining our capitalistic marketplace. Very very few men in our time are leaders in more than one discipline”). This essay demonstrates clear and consistent mastery and is scored 6.

The Official SAT Study Guide Avail Practice Test 1

Prompt

Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and assignment below.

To change is to risk something, making us feel insecure. Not to change is a bigger risk, though we seldom feel that way. There is no choice but to change. People, however, cannot be motivated to change from the outside. All of our motivation comes from within.

Adapted from Ward Sybouts, Planning in School Administration: A Handbook Assignment

What motivates people to change? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from you reading, studies, experience, or observations.

Sample Essay - 6分范文

What motivates people to change is a relentless and innate desire for

self-improvement. Rarely ever has history seen a man or society kick back, relax, and say “Well that about does it. Not much else to do here!” Within every person is the potential to achieve greatness in some form; be it athletically, mentally, spiritually. This inherent potential demands that people continue to explore and change both their environments and themselves throughout their life’s course. Never should a man be idle for too long. After acknowledging the changes a man has already made to his environment, the pursuit of self-improvement will once again stir within his soul and call him to action. This internal desire, this pursuit of challenge and perfection, does not prohibit man from being happy with his status and

achievements. On the contrary, the device serves more to allow the man to constantly strive for greater change, newer innovation. What motivates people to change is the ongoing need to redefine people’s lives and identities –to elevate them to higher levels of eminence and success.

A good example of this can be seen in clinical psychology. When patients seek therapy for difficulties that have encumbered their daily functioning, they most often arrive for treatment voluntarily and willingly- they consciously accept the necessity of therapy and so participate without any duress. During the course of clinical therapy, the patient’s concerns, anxieties, ideas, emotions, and fears are brought to light. However, the clinician does not try to alter the beliefs, feeling, and sentiments of his client; rather, he simply illuminates them in order to provide the patient with an accurate view of himself. The process, of raising concerns and ideas to the surface of conscious awareness, is known as clarification. Modern psychology is a far throw from the psychoanalysis of Freud’s time, in which psychologists attempted to “interpret” pre-and unconscious feelings that had been repressed by the patient. Because clinicians only clarify, and not dissect, alter, or interpret a client’s inner desires and emotions, the client himself is

responsible for instituting change. If he is to change, he must dictate the course of therapy, and make the conscious choice to improve himself. This widely used approach is called “client centered therapy.” If the client’s ennui or ill feelings are due to situational factors or internal designs (as oppose to biological changes that would qualify for a diagnosis of psychopathology (mental disorder)), he must change them on his own accord to precipitate change within himself. The therapist will not “cure” him in any way. He alone must answer the call within himself to refine and redefine his identity and place in society. This need, of self-improvement, also initially brought him to the therapist. He was able to recognize the disorder of his environment and acknowledge his own negative feelings.

This in turn brought him to therapy, where he was guided through a process of introspection that ultimately enabled him to improve himself, assuage his anxieties, and rightfully continue on his lifelong pursuit of even greater achievements.

Score Explanation 6分原因与点评

This outstanding essay effectively and insightfully develops the point of view that “What motivates people to change is the ongoing need to redefine people’s lives and identities – to elevate them to higher levels of eminence and sucess.” The writer demonstrates outstanding critical thinking by clearly focusing on “client centered therapy” to support this position. The writer begins by

explaining that “When patients seek therapy for difficulties that have encumbered their daily functioning, they most often arrive for treatment voluntarily and willingly.” The writer then describes the process of therapy and shows how, if the client “is to change, he must dictate the course of therapy, and make the conscious choice to improve himself.” The writer concludes with the idea that therapy is a tool for someone who wishes to change, and while the therapist will not “cure” a client, the introspection encouraged by the therapist can “refine and redefine” the client’s “identity and place in society.” The essay is well organized, demonstrating clear coherence and smooth progression of ideas. Throughout the essay, the writer exhibits the skillful use of language by using a varied, accurate, and apt vocabulary (“During the course of clinical therapy, the patient’s concerns, anxieties, ideas, emotions, and fears are brought to light. However, the clinician does not try to alter the beliefs, feelings, and sentiments of his client; rather, he simply illuminates them in order to provide the patient with an accurate view of himself. This process, of raising concerns and ideas to the surface of conscious awareness, is known as clarification”). This response demonstrates clear and consistent mastery and receives a score of 6.

The Official SAT Study Guide Avail Practice Test 4

Prompt

Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and assignment below.

The old saying, "be careful what you wish for," may be an appropriate warning. The drive to archive a particular goal can dangerously narrow one's perspective and encourage the fantasy that success in one endeavor will solve all of life's

difficulties. In fact, success can sometimes have unexpected consequences. Those

who propel themselves toward the achievement of one goal often find that their lives are worse once "success" is achieved than they were before.

Assignment

Can success be disastrous? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your readings, studies, experience, and observations.

Sample Essay - Score of 6 SAT写作6分范文

The power of success can be disastrous when placed in the wrong hands. Naturally, there are those who will always choose to manipulate conditions to succeed in their own endeavors, not taking into consideration the lives of those around them. On the other hand, there may be those who do not necessarily pursue selfish ends, but simply do not know where to take success once it has been achieved, thus resulting in their own self-sabotage.

Throughout history, we have seen success used wrongfully in the hands of the unworthy. Powerful leaders of nations, kingdoms, and empires, having succeeded in gaining leadership, have then used their influence wrongfully in achieving their own selfish (and sometimes twisted) goals. Nero, the Roman emperor who beat his pregnant wife to death and has been suspected of instigating the great fire of Rome in an attempt to boost his own political influence. Henry VIII of England, for whom women were beheaded for not bearing him a son, and who is rumored to have eaten eight chickens a night while English peasants starved. The notorious Ferdinand and Isabella of Spain, who carried out the Spanish Inquisition. The list is endless. Even in literature, we see the corruption and downfall of society and mankind as a whole as a result of the abuse of success in the possession of those who do not deserve it, as seen in William Shakespeare’s tragedy of King Lear. In the story, societal order is replaced with chaos when there is a power shift from Lear to his evil daughters, Regan and Goneril. This order only returns to a slight degree when virtue (in the form of Lear’s good daughter, Cordelia) returns to England. Success is hazardous when awarded to the unvirtuous.

However, there may be those who are not necessarily evil of greedy in their pursuits, but merely do not know how to handle success. This proves to be just more disastrous to the individual than to anyone else, since it is the individual who will then sabotage his own success to return to his former comfort zone. Success is meant to be grown upon, not exploited or feared.

Success, when achieved by the unworthy or inexperienced, is a most disastrous element. Success is not about being happy at the expense of those about you –it is about using one’s newly gained happiness to improve the lives of others. If one reflects on the wise words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, one will never go astray: “To

know that one person has breathed easier because you have lived -this is to have succeeded.”

Score Explanation SAT写作6分范文点评

This essay demonstrates outstanding critical thinking by insightfully

developing the point of view that, while "there are those who will always choose to manipulate conditions to succeed in their own endeavors, not taking into

consideration the lives of those around them," there are also "those who do not necessarily pursue selfish ends, but simply do not know where to take success once it has been achieved, thus resulting in their own self-sabotage." The essay

effectively supports this position by first focusing on multiple clearly appropriate examples from history and literature of "success used wrongfully in the hands of the unworthy." By describing corrupt or abusive actions of Nero, Henry VIII, "Ferdinand and Isabella of Spain," and the fictional daughters of King Lear in Shakespeare’s play. The essay develops the idea that a historical pattern exists in which, after successfully "gaining leadership," "Powerful leaders?have then used their influence wrongfully in achieving their own selfish (and sometimes twisted) goals." The essay easily moves to discuss how success can be disastrous for "those who are not necessarily evil or greedy in their pursuits, but merely do not know how to handle success," and therefore "sabotage" their success to return to a "former comfort zone." Finally, the essay supports the writer's own definition of success, with the appropriate words of Ralph Waldo Emerson ("To know that one person has breathed easier because you have lived--this is to have succeeded"). This well-organized and clearly focused essay demonstrates coherence and smooth

progression of ideas. The essay consistently demonstrates skillful use of language ("In the story, societal order is replaced with chaos when there is a power shift from Lear to his evil daughters, Regan and Goneril"). This essay demonstrates clear and consistent mastery and achieves the highest score of 6.

The Official SAT Study Guide Avail Practice Test 5

Prompt

Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and assignment below.

We shall be both kinder and fairer in our treatment of others if we understand them better. Understanding ourselves and understanding others are connected, since as human beings we all have things in common.

Assignment

Do we need other people in order to understand ourselves? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your readings, studies, experience, and observations.

Sample Essay - Score of 6 SAT写作6分范文

Most parents and teachers tell students the extremely tired cliché of the consequences of following the crowd. It is said that, in order to be a competely individual thinker, one must ignore what others say. Such advice is certainly true to some extent; unreasonable malice must be forgotten in order to keep some level of self-esteem. However, as with most ideas, this one can not be taken in absolute form. In at least some respects, we need other people in order to understand ourselves.

An excellent example of a literary character who could have psychologically benefitted from social interaction is J. Alfred Prufrock from T.S. Eliot’s poem “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.” In the poem, Prufrck desires a relationship with a woman very much, but he refrains from initiating conversation because he fears that he could not hold the interest of a sophisticated lady. Should Prufrock have taken the step to accept other people into his life, he most likely would have discovered, as the reader of the poem certainly did, that he is most articulate. Others would have impressed upon him the beauty of his words and his talent for prose. If Prufrock would have spoken his song a loud, the ladies surely would have shown him what he himself did not understand. Since the ladies would reveal Prufrock’s talents to him, it is true that we need others in order to understand ourselves.

The lesson of learning from other’s opinions of yourself extends much farther than the song of a fictional character. Two days ago, in an art class, my group of students had assigned self portraits due. Most of us brought in photographs of ourselves. Nevertheless, one boy brought nothing and handed us all slips of paper. He told us to write a word to describe him, and when we had done so, he pasted the words on a poster. This must have been a revealing exercise for him because, upon the sight of such descriptions as “bitter” and “sarcastic”, he was shocked. In the case of this boy, he had not realized how his personality appeared to others. Though he might not have thought himself “bitter”, his friend’s comments

certainly made him seem that way. The fact that we need others in order to understand ourselves is clearly shown by this boy’s revelation.

Score Explanation SAT写作6分范文点评

This outstanding essay effectively and insightfully develops the point of view that “In at least some respects, we need other people in order to understand ourselves.” The writer demonstrates outstanding critical thinking by focusing on

the differing examples of J. Alfred Prufrock and a peer from the writer’s own class to support this position. The essay first describes how, by not allowing himself to interact with women, Prufrock denies himself the approval necessary to “reveal Prufrock’s talents to him.” Next, the writer contrasts this with the shock a classmate feels after reading how his classmates describe him. Both of these clearly appropriate examples reinforce the writer’s position. This essay is well organized, focusing first on the character from Eliot’s poem and then smoothly shifting focus to the personal example of the writer’s peer. The strength of organization and focus allow this essay to demonstrate a depth of development, clear coherence, and smooth progression of ideas. The essay exhibits skillful use of language and demonstrates meaningful variety in sentence structure (“An excellent example of a literary character who could have psychologically benefitted from social interaction is J. Alfred Prufrock from T.S. Eliot’s poem ‘The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.’ In the poem, Prufrock desires a relationship with a woman very much, but he refrains from initiating conversation because he fears that he could not hold the interest of a sophisticated lady”). Demonstrating clear and consistent mastery, this essay receives the highest score of 6.

Prompt

Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and assignment below.

There is, of course, no legitimate branch of science that enables us to predict the future accurately. Yet the degree of change in the world is so overwhelming and so promising that the future, I believe, is far brighter than anyone has contemplated since the end of the Second World War.

Adapted from Allan E.Goodman, A Brief History of the Future: The United States in a Changing World Order.

Assignment

Is the world changing for the better? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your readings, studies, experience, and observations.

Sample Essay - Score of 6 SAT写作6分范文

Reactions to World Wars one and two in expressed by the artistic community and historically do not support the idea that the world is changing for the better. One example of the negative effects of World War two psychologically may be taken from Leslie Marmon Silko’s novel Ceremony. The novel’s protagonist, Tayo, a young

native american veteran living on a reservation, returns from his war experience severely mentally damaged, referring to himself at one point as “white smoke”. The novel expresses several times that Tayo is only one case of many damaged young native americans who return from this war. Elders of the Laguna native american tribe express distress at the fact that they will not be able to heal their returning World War two warriors with traditional war healing ceremonies, and Tayo believes this is because warfare has changed dramatically.

The tribe, losing many members to the war physically and psychologically, suffers weakening blows. It is clear that the difference between old warfare in which warriors could face their enemies and new warfare in which soldiers shoot blindly across distances is great. The destruction of modern warfare witnessed by the new veterans was devastating in a ruinous way as it never had been. The resulting threat of the disintegration of the tribe as old healing techniques fail weakens the tribe in ways it had never been weakened before.

A similar mental disintegration, tied in with a lack of optimism was seen a great deal following World War one. Before the war, old Enlightenment ideas of rational thought, progress, and the goodness of mankind abounded. The incredible and unprecedented distruction seen in World War one, however, combined with the psychological effect of the use of the newest mass-destruction and chemical weapons proved to quash the pre-war sentiment of optimism and post-Enlightenment zeal. New weapons such as mustard gas and machine guns could kill thousands in unspeakably brutal ways, and the casualties of the war, greater than any in history, showed the weapons to be very effective. The loss of human life in hundreds of thousands, combined with the destruction of European land at the end of World War one proved to crush the morale of the European populace and to discourage optimism with regard to scientific progress; scientific progress had only served to cause destruction and horror in war.

The negative psychological repercussions of World War one and two served to give people, particulary Europeans, a less optimistic view of the world and of mankind. The change in weaponry and style of warfare, visible in the example of Silko’s Ceremony, contribute to the idea that the world was not changing for the better; the new warriors of Ceremony could not be healed, and the optimistic, naive vision of pre-world war two Europe could not be restored. If man could cause such immense physical and psychological destruction with the products of scientific change, the world could not have changed for the better.

Score Explanation SAT写作6分范文点评

This outstanding essay insightfully and effectively develops the point of view that “If man could cause such immense physical and psychological destruction with

the products of scientific change, the world could not have changed for the better.” The writer demonstrates outstanding critical thinking by focusing on clearly appropriate evidence from literature and history to support this position. The essay begins by describing Leslie Marmon Silko's Ceremony as a novel in which the

"protagonist, Tayo, a young native american veteran," becomes representative of the "many damaged young native americans" who returned from World War II. Traumatized by the "new warfare in which soldiers shoot blindly across distances," these former soldiers pose a threat of "disintegration of the tribe as old healing techniques fail." Next, the response discusses "A similar mental disintegration, tied in with a lack of optimism" in Europe following World War I, as "old Enlightenment ideas of rational thought, progress, and the goodness of mankind" were challenged by "New weapons such as mustard gas and machine guns" that "could kill thousands in

unspeakably brutal ways" and therefore "crush the morale of the European populace and ?discourage optimism with regard to scientific progress." This well-organized and clearly focused essay demonstrates coherence and progression of ideas. Several capitalization errors are offset by the essay's consistently skillful use of language and meaningful variety in sentence structure ("The change in weaponry and style of warfare, visible in the example of Silko's Ceremony, contribute to the idea that the world was not changing for the better; the new warriors of Ceremony could not be healed, and the optimistic, naive vision of pre-world war two Europe could not be restored"). This, this essay demonstrates clear and consistent mastery and is scored 6.

相关推荐