20##年9月7日雅思写作分析与范文参考

小作文：A类小作文题 根据所给的两张图对比a typical Japanese office & a typical American office

答题策略：主体分两段，分别叙述日本和美国；在美国段落加入对比。日本的主要特点是group,而美国特点是individual.

大作文：

nuclear energy is the best source of power in meeting ever-increasing energy needs，to what extent do you agree or disagree.

 

相关题目：

Fossil fuels are the main sources in many countries, but in some countries the use of alternative sources of energy are encouraged. Is it a positive or negative development (2009.05.30)

提纲：

 

In the era of energy scarcity, diverse sources of energyare required to meet the growing need of the modern technology society. In addition to traditional fossil fuels, alternative energy resources such as nuclear and solar energy have been explored and developed. In this essay, the discussion will narrow down to nuclear power, which is raising controversy in terms of its advantages and disadvantages.  (被动句，定语从句)

Nuclear power gains support for some reasons and the most obvious one is its high efficiency. It is said that a single nuclear plant can generate several times as much power ascoal or natural gas. The second upside of this energy is the loweremission of carbon dioxidethan fossil fuels during the production. This clean energy power means significantly nowadays when global warming is threatening the survival of human being. Additionally the technology of nuclear power generation is relatively maturecompared with solar and this availability reduces its investment in technology development in nuclear plant construction and operation. （并列句，主语从句，对比句，时间状语从句）

However, it is the dangers of utilizing nuclear power thatarouses the public disapproval. Nuclear leak accidents and waste pollution were reported in some countries, evoking worldwide concern about its security issues like radiation and its negative influence on the environment. Unfortunately there is still no solution to nuclear waste disposal yet. Nuclear power is not a sustainable energy becauseuranium, the source of nuclear power, is not renewable and the reserve is very limited on the earth. （强调句，动名词，非谓语，there be，原因状语从句，并列句）

Based on the above analysis of the pros and cons of nuclear power, it is hard to deny that nuclear is a high efficient and clean source of electricity, but there exists some obstacles to make a safe use of it. Therefore, to answer the question above, nuclear power is one but not the best source of power to meet the demand for energy and other energy resources should be explored as well. (形式主语，宾语从句，转折句，并列句)

词汇拓展：

1.         era 时代

2.         energy scarcity 电能紧缺

3.         sources of energy 能源

4.         fossil fuel 化石燃料

5.         alternative 可替代的

6.         solar 太阳能

7.         narrow down 缩小

8.         controversy 争论

9.         nuclear plant 核电站

10.     generate 生产

11.     coal 煤

12.     natural gas 天然气

13.     carbon dioxide 二氧化碳

14.     emission 排放

15.     obstacle 障碍

16.     mature 成熟的

17.     utilize 利用

18.     arouse 引起

19.     disapproval 反对 n.

20.     leak 泄露

21.     evoke 激起

22.     security 安全

23.     radiation 辐射

24.     disposal 处理

25.     sustainable 可持续的

26.     uranium 镭

27.     reserve 储备

28.     survival 生存

 

第二篇：月考作文分析

1.审题立意上。选择“追求完美”题目的基本能够扣题。而选择“放弃完美”的，立意比较多偏题的。共同出现的问题是：（1）不管“追求”或者“放弃”，这都是主动选择的，而考生“主动选择”这个立意方向却表现淡薄。如刘伟和贝多芬等身体有残疾缺陷的，这是客观的“不完美”，由不得他们主动选择或者放弃。（2）议论文的是非判断不清晰，弱化了中心论点。“追求完美”是肯定自己选择的“完美”，“放弃完美”是否定自己选择的“完美”。议论文明确的是非观，需要对“完美”在特定环境的含义进行自我判定。如有学生把慈禧太后每天用鸡蛋清敷脸、玫瑰花洗澡保持了少女肌肤的美容定位为“追求完美”，立意较为肤浅。也有学生由于认识局限，知道批判“追求物质的完美”是奴役形体的自由，可惜又表现出对物质追求的羡慕。导致前后的不一致。这也就出现了问题（3）：论点升华不到位，甚至总结拖沓，不坚持自己的观点，引出对前文的质疑，文章前工后拙。

以上这些，归结是审题立意出现了偏差。

2.行文结构上：（1）C类班的刻意扣观点，通篇几个例子的摆陈不分析等现象还是存在，但比以前好了许多。不少同学基本能够运用月考前的作文练习分析论点方法：因果分析法、假设分析法。普通班的运用比较生硬。需要多加练习。

（2）文体选择，大多数是选择了议论文。改的6份卷子中，发现5个同学用了记叙文。运用记叙文由于铺垫太多，情节铺展缓慢，出现主题就结束了。但同学对于人物细节描写的把握还是较为到位的。

（3）比较多学生不大重视段与段之间、分论点之间的过渡。

3.书写上，文科班有明显优势，理科C类班稍觉潦草。