搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》

搞笑5人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》

演员表：

西门吹雪

叶孤城

花满楼

打更的太监

旁白

道具：牛奶两袋，纸屑若干。

第一幕：决战乡村陌路

旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow.

Birds are dancing in the cold.

A man is walking along the street, step by step.

Wind is coming in silence.

Another mysterious man approaches.

打更的太监：The weather is dry and things are flammable, take care not catch the fire! I’m 打酱油的！

Y与X相遇．

X：Ohm, I’m sorry to knock you!

Y: Ha-ha, Never mind baby.

X: Excuse me, Could you tell me your name?

Y: ha ha, I won’t change my name! No matter what happens. I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng（登登登登！！！）. Who are you?

X: I’m ximenchuixue.

Y(惊讶): Ar, ximenchuixue?

X: Yes, what is wrong?

Y: I heard that you are the best Martial Arts?

X: Great, you know me!

Y(抱腿)：Please, please…… Don’t kill me! Let me go!

X: No, I must kill you!

Y: I don’t want to be killed. Let me go!

X: No way! You know?

Y(突然站起冷冷的说)：Don’t force me!

X: Pardon!

(Y拿出一袋牛奶)

X(抢过牛奶):Milk, very good! I like drinking it.

Y: Please drink it!

X(喝完牛奶):Thanks, ha-ha

Y: Do you still want to kill me?

X: Sure, must! Milk is milk.

Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good! Very good! I hope you will not forget what you said!?

X: I’m sure I won’t!

Y: I must give you a lesson! If I don’t beat you this time, I’ll never be having properly! 3-2-1-0

X(捂着肚子，蹲下)：Ouch, Ouch!

Y(大笑)：Ha Ha……

X(可怜状): Help! Help! Where is the washroom?

Y: What?

X: Toliet?

Y: What?

X: The “WC”?

Y: Oh, I see, go along this street and turn right when you see a crossing road! X: Thanks, bye-bye.

Y(掏出纸屑吹):This is genuine snow!

H: Stop! Protecting the environment is a basic obligation!

Y: Who are you?

H: Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?

Y: Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC” now, ha……

H(惊讶):Now you are the best in the world!

Y: You are right!

H: Teriffic! You are the one I’m looking for! Do you want to join in me? Y: Yes, It’s very good.

H: Ok, follow me; let’s go!

Y: Ok, Let’s go!

(To be continued…)

 

第二篇：白雪公主英语话剧剧本

本人20##年毕业于聊城大学英语语言文学专业， 20##年1月聘为讲师。一直工作于教学第一线，爱岗敬业，遵守每一项规章制度，积极参加学院的各项工作，现将任现职以来的工作总结如下：

一，思想政治方面

积极参加思想政治学习，拥护国家一切方针政策，拥护党的领导，践行社会主义核心价值观，积极向党组织靠拢， 20##年6月光荣成为中国共产党员。

二，教学工作方面

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受到学生好评和同行认可;

3.       除了完成正常教学任务以外,还积极开设《英汉翻译赏析》《职场英语》等选修课;

4.       提高现代教育技术应用水平，进行课件开发,获得第三届高职高专英语课堂教学课

件比赛公共组一等奖和二等奖，位次分别为2/4，4/4；

5.       注重教学基本功，20##年参加《首届全省高等学校教师微课教学比赛》获得三等奖；

6.       进修培训方面:在教学中精益求精,主动发现问题并完善自我,20##年，20##年，2013

年和20##年四次参加山东省教育厅高校教师师资培训中心和教育部高等教育司举行的培训，内容分别为《高校教师现代教育技术培训》《大学英语教改培训》《英汉口译》和《大学英语》。

7.       20##年年度考核为先进

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探索全方位的教学改革，包括教学模式,教学方法，评价方法和教学手段的改革，工作成果和研究成果如下：

1. 教育部高职高专英语教指委资助课题第二期《“教学做”一体化高职英语教学模式研究》，1/4，已结题

2. 教育部高职高专英语教指委资助课题第三期《《任务驱动式教学和情境教学法在高职英语教学中的应用研究》，1/6，已结题

3. 中国职业技术教育学会教工委课题《高职英语教学中的教学方法改革研究》，1/6，已结题。

4. 主持学院资助课题《高职英语教学模式改革研究》，1/6，已结题

5. 第二届院优秀教学成果奖三等奖《“教学做”一体化高职英语教学模式研究》，1/7

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到“自主”》,5/6，已结题

7. 参与《基于实践能力培养的大学英语多元化考核与评价方式改革研究》，6/6，结题。

8. 参与课题《大学英语》教学课件开发，5/8，已结项

9.《大学英语》精品课建设，主讲教师

10.参与教材建设，参加《建筑实用英语》编写，参编

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12. 论文《“教学做”一体化教学与PPP教学在高职英语教学中的对比研究》和《关于高职学生英语应用能力调查报告》分别发表于《海外英语》和《剑南文学》

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20##年学校成为6个“两结合,三育人”工作试点单位之一,我积极报名承担班主任工作,担任造价1213，造价1309两个班的班主任，定期召开主题班会，经常与辅导员交流班级情况，根据学生的具体情况，有针对性的与他们交流沟通。取得成绩如下：

1.       20##-2014第二学期优秀班主任；

2.       《感恩父母，拥抱亲情》优秀主题班会；

3.       主持的课题《“两结合,三育人” 班主任实践工作研究》获学院立项。

----音乐起， 旁白：A long time ago, there was a queen. She had a pretty daughter named Snow White. Soon after the child was born, the queen died. The king married another queen. The step mother didn’t like her very much. She made Snow White do the housework all day and all night.

----白雪出场( 扫地,做清洁.)

白雪：My name is Snow White , I am a beautiful princess, I miss my mother so much, Where is my mother? Where is my mother?

----音乐起，皇后出场

皇后：I’m the new queen. I’m very beautiful. you see. If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her. I have a magic mirror. If I want to know something, It will tell me. Now, mirror, mirror, come here!

魔镜：Yes, I’m coming. What do you want to know?

皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the wall. Who is the most beautiful?

魔镜：You are beautiful, I think. But there is a young lady. She is as white as snow, as red as rose. She is much more beautiful than you.

皇后：She is much more beautiful than me? Who is she? Tell me quickly.

魔镜：Yes. She is Snow White.

皇后：Snow White? No, I’m the most beautiful in the world. Oh, hunter, come here, come here!

猎人：Yes. I’m here now.

皇后：Hunter! Take Snow White far away to pick some flowers. Find a place and kill her.

猎人：But she is the princess. …

皇后：No, Kill her. Bring her heart to me. I don’t want to see her again.

猎人：Yes!

皇后：Here is a box. You must put her heart in it and bring it to me.

猎人：Yes!

----音乐起

白雪：( 高兴地摘花 ) One flower, two flowers, three flowers…. How many flowers! How beautiful!

猎人：( 慢慢地拔出刀,但犹豫着说 ) Oh! My God! She is so lovely and pretty! I can’t! I can’t kill her!

白雪：( 看到后大声哭叫)What are you doing? What’s the matter? Why do you kill me?

猎人： I’m very sorry. Someone wants me to kill you.

白雪：But who?

猎人：The queen.

白雪： But why?

猎人：You are more beautiful than her. So she wants to kill you.

白雪：My dear hunter. Don’t kill me. I will run far away and never come back again.

猎人：Ok. Run away, the poor child.

白雪：Thank you, my dear hunter.

旁白：At this time, a young bear was running by. The hunter shot it and took the heart to the queen. Snow White began to run into the wild forest until it was almost evening. She saw a little house.

白雪：Oh, my God! The queen can’t find me now, I think. How I am tired! How I want to have a rest! Ah, here is a house, there are seven small beds. They must be the beds of seven children. Oh, how I want to sleep!

旁白：When it was dark, the owners of the house came back. They were seven dwarfs. They were looking for gold in the mountain.

①老学究：Look, the lamp in our house is on!

②开心果：Who is it?

③喷嚏精：Maybe it’s the ghost!

④瞌睡虫：Let’s go into our house quietly.

⑤害羞鬼：Oh, someone has cleaned our house.

⑥老顽固：Maybe it’s the witch.

⑦手拿烛光照到白雪的脸. ①~⑦他们都惊叫起来

老学究：What a lovely child!

开心果：How beautiful!

喷嚏精：Who is she?

瞌睡虫：Don’t wake her up.

害羞鬼：Why is she coming here?

老顽固：Kill her.

白雪：  ( 醒来 ) What a nice sleep! Oh, who are you? Oh, I know. You are senven dwarfs.

七矮人：(齐说) Yes,But why are you in our house?

白雪：The queen wants to kill me. So I ran to your house. Don’t drive me away. Let me stay with you.

老学究：If you look after our house.

开心果：If you do some cooking for us.

喷嚏精：If you make the beds for us.

瞌睡虫：If you do some washing, you can stay with us.

害羞鬼：But you must be careful.

老顽固：Don’t go out. Don’t let anyone come in. Your stepmother will find you and kill you.

白雪：I know. I know. Thank you.

旁白：From then on, Snow White kept the house.

On the other hand, when the bad queen ate the heart, she took out the mirror and asked.

皇后：Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the most beautiful?

魔镜： You are beautiful. But Snow White is still alive and well. She lives with the seven dwarfs. No one is more beautiful than she.

皇后：What? Snow White is not dead?……Haha,I got a good idea.

旁白：The queen made a poisonous apple and dressed herself like an old woman. She came to the house .

皇后：Good things to sell. Pretty apples to sell. Cheap. Very cheap.

白雪：Hi, good day, my good grandmother.

皇后：Apples. Very delicious apples! Could you have a taste. This one, please!

白雪：OK! Thank you! ( 咬了一小口,死了 )

皇后：Hahaha….Now I’m the most beautiful in the world.

旁白：When the seven dwarfs came from work. They were greatly surprised to see Snow White dead

七矮人：What’s the matter?

老学究：Snow White is dead.

七矮人：Oh, my God! Who did it? It must be the bad queen. (哭着拣一些花放在白雪身上)

旁白：Although Snow White had been dead a long, long time. She looked as if she was living. She looked as white as snow, as red as rose. One day, it happened a prince came to the seven dwarfs’ house. When he saw Snow White, he fell in love with her.

王子：Please, let me have Snow White. I love her. I want her to be my wife.

七矮人：Ok! Carry Snow White with you to your palace. Be kind to her, please.

王子：Yes, I will. I will love her forever!( 吻白雪手)

旁白：As soon as the prince kissed Snow White, Snow White came to her life

白雪：Oh, my god! Where am I? What happened?

王子：You are with me, my dear. I love you. I love you more than everything in the world. Please be my queen, will you?

白雪：Yes, I will, my dear!

七矮人：Oh! Congratulations! Congratulations!

----音乐起,旁白：The prince took Snow White to the palace. Their wedding was held with great show

白雪：Good Bye!

七矮人：Bye-bye! May you Happy Forever!

白雪、王子：Thank you. Good Bye. See you later.

(谢幕)

doctor 这里的翻译是”万事通”。Doc是7个小矮人当中的领袖人物，尽管如此，他也是个迷糊的家伙；

Bashful 害羞鬼，特别特别爱脸红，跟大姑娘似的；

Sleepy 瞌睡虫，就是那种永远也睡不醒的家伙；

Sneezy 喷嚏精，据说一个喷嚏就能引起大灾难！

Happy 开心果，爱笑，乐观！

Dopey 迷糊鬼，不会说话但好可爱的一个，据说不会说话是因为找不到合适的配音演员；

Grumpy 中文名叫做爱生气，其实是七个小矮人中最勇敢的一个呢。