神探夏洛克有JQ的台词

神探夏洛克有 JQ 的台词 1 哈德森太太： “如果你们需要分开睡的话，楼上还有一间卧室。 ” 花生：我们当然需要两间卧室！ 2 麦哥哥：你和福尔摩斯什么关系？花生无知无辜状：我，我昨天才见到他。。麦哥哥：你昨天才见到他，今天就跟他到现场查案，明天是不是得宣布举办幸福的订婚仪式了？花生：…… 麦哥哥：请你住进去，把他的近况随时告诉我。花生：不。麦哥哥：我还没出价呢……（转口赞扬）多么忠诚啊。（哥哥您其实是想说你还没出嫁吧！！别死撑了，您就说您嫉妒么……） 3 花生：你不告诉警察吗？福尔摩斯：四个人死了我们没空和警察说。花生：那你为什么和我说？（ “我”字加重音。。花生你真的要问的这么直白吗。）。福楞了一下：因为哈德森太太拿走了我的骷髅。花生：所以我是它的代替品。。福：放轻松，你做得很好。（这个原文 Relax, you are doing fine.被那诡异的嗓子一说，意味就古怪了起来。）。然后福腹黑地说你可以坐在那里看一晚上无聊电视，或者…… 花生：你想我陪你一起去？（呆花生也会逗人啊）福：……我喜欢有伴这样可以有得谈话，而骷髅又太显眼了。（这个假矜持还能再明显点吗喂）花生：可是……刚刚那个女警官。。福（穿外套）：她跟你说什么了？花生：（还在扭捏）她说你很危险，要我远离你。（花生啊你这话和吃了我吧快来吧没有差别啊……）福（淡定）：我刚才发短信说“有危险” ，可你就来了。（原文被他一念：And I said dangerous, and here you are. 最后这个 and here you are.尾音已经是腹黑全开，然后十拿九稳，转身利落出门！）花生：可恶，被他看穿了！（一下从沙发站了起来）捂脸…… 4 餐馆老板：给你的约会对象来点什么？花生：我不是他的约会对象！说了一堆以后，老板：我给你们拿蜡烛来这样更浪漫。花生（朝着背影）：我不是他的约会对象！！ 5 花生：常人不会有死敌。福：那他们都有什么？花生：喜欢的人，讨厌的人，女朋友，男朋友…… 福：女朋友，所以我说很无聊。花生：这么说你从没有过女朋友？福（观察对街）：girlfriends? No, not really my area.字幕组翻译成： “女朋友？不，我志不在此。 ”也已经够腐的了，我觉得直译也很够劲道了： “女朋友？不，还真不是我的领域。 ”一击杀死啊！花生（还嫌不够，继续）然后你有男朋友吗？有的话我也无所谓哦。福（转过头有点警觉）：我知道你无所谓。花生一脸八卦表情：所以，你有男朋友吗？福：没有。花生的回答竟然是： Right. Good.然后舔了下嘴唇！！！然后寂寞地

笑了笑说：！！！ “挺好的，你无牵无挂，就像我。 ” 掀桌！这是寂寞 GAY 片的典型开场吗？！！6 麦哥哥：他要不就是救了歇洛克，要不就是让他陷得更深…… 跟班手机女：sir,有何指示？麦哥：提升监视级别：对歇洛克福尔摩斯和约翰华生医生。（随着这仿佛祝福一般的画外音的是，俩人相视而笑衣袂飘飞并肩走来……死腐导演故意用让群众失血的慢镜头！）！第2集 1 福在对墙射击，花生进门：上帝啊你在搞什么！福：本少爷无聊。（翻译组！你们真的没有意识到这是多傲娇的回答吗？）俩人火力来回几句之后，福竟然裹着毯子向里倒在沙发上（一副小媳妇赌气状）！花生沉默穿衣出门，福竟猛然转头：你要去哪里！花生：呼吸新鲜空气。（话说我觉得这一段都快逆我 CP 了）哈德森太太出现了（果然是您老最牛）：小俩口拌嘴啦？（原文 you two have some domestic?这样翻译十分准确。） -----------------------我看得翻译是“你们有一些家庭内部矛盾了？”不如“小俩口拌嘴”口语化，但却有着腹黑的调侃与讽刺~ 3 福：是雷斯垂德，他召唤我呢。你来吗？花生：如果你要我去的话。很自然的。福：of course。转头，没有我的博客作家，我会无所适从的。i will be lost without my blogger。 ---------------我反倒觉得“召唤”神马的，太过分了……蕾丝的召唤老福你怎么这样有求必应！于是小花太不放心了，一定要去亲眼见证。老福也觉得行为不妥，来一句“I will be lost……” 。你来我往心意相通神马的太有爱了。 5 福：给我手机。花生在两桌子对面：where？福若无其事根本不看他：我的上衣里。花生转了两下走了过来，从左后掏上衣兜。福嫌：轻点！花生于是又靠近了些掏出来。。 --------------------小花的动作比最后老福扒衣服更具有误导性不是吗……要我说如果拍下这个画面，people won't just talk,they will tell the truth. 6 喜欢福的法医 mm 带了个男生来：hi，这是 jim，我们是办公室恋情，他想见见你。福斜了一眼：gay。茉莉：什么？！福：哦，没什么，hey。男生尴尬走了以后，茉莉爆发了：你说谁是 gay，我们正在交往！福：他的打扮。花生：就因为他往头发上抹东西吗？我也抹啊。（小花你能别这么仗义么）福打断迅速说：你头发上抹的不一样。（说这话真的大概只用了两秒但是实在太亲昵了无法放过啊）他描了眉…… -----------我看到小花的插嘴的时候，不是觉得他仗义啊，反而觉得他在暗示些什么……【其实我也是 Gay 啊夏夏你怎么没有注意到我……】，而老福很懂，不想让两人的秘密人尽皆知，马上帮他掩饰。总之小花的

反应让我一下觉得【出轨也不要这么明显！大庭广众啊喂！】 11 死者弟弟一个胖大叔在调查中突然坐到花生身边，整个屋子只有两人，导演故意使用俯视镜头：我现在六神无主，我姐姐留给我这个房子……它，很可爱……但是没有她，已经家不成家…… 花生赶紧打断：哦这正是我的报社想要知道的……你觉得现在，你可以承受吗？胖大叔紧紧盯着他：我可以。（眼睛眨也不眨）你……尽管问。（原话是 you fire away，如果翻译成更劲爆的“你……尽管开火” ，估计姐妹们都要风中凌乱了吧！！字幕君真仁慈！！）之后福就马上接到了花生电话：你赶快过来！----------------------这个的确太绝了……导演故意卖腐神马的最讨厌了……小花花 call 老公来救神马的，昭然若揭啊昭然若揭。 12 超有爱的画面福蜷缩在沙发里吼：不！不不！他不可能是这男孩的爹！！看看他牛仔裤的卷边！！花生在背后灯下写他的小博客：我就知道这很危险，让你看垃圾电视。然后俩人无比温馨地扯了点话。。福：然后我哥再次，拿爵位威胁我。花生：你知道我一直在等。（you know i'm still waiting.说得淡定而清晰）福（听到背后这么说，表情终于变了，抬了抬眉毛）：哦？花生（好可爱地继续耕耘博客）：等你承认，要是对太阳系多点了解，你就能更快破解假画之谜了。福（往后一歪头)你也不知道啊？ -----------我觉得原句的意思应该是，你是知道太阳系的事情，这也没让你得到什么好处啊？花生（也往后一歪头)：可我不是这宇宙中唯一一个的咨询侦探呀。（好可爱！）第3集第三集的最后，花生身绑炸弹抱住莫里蒂亚准备和他同归于尽，然后叫福快跑，结果计划失败。最后福救了他，很着急地拖掉花生衣服，当然其实是绑着炸弹的衣服，丢开，然后很别扭地说，呃，你刚才。。。做的很好。。。花生：幸亏刚才没人看见，被别人看见你在黑暗的泳池边扒我衣服，别人会说闲话的。哇咔咔。。。。小夏真的是太傲娇了，花生也很忠犬啊。。。。。

第二篇：神探夏洛克S01E01 A_Study_in_Pink 全英台词

A Study in Pink S01E01

A Study in Pink

TH=Therapist JW=John Watson

TH : How's your blog going?

JW: Yeah, good, very good.

TH: You haven't written a word, have you?

JW: You just wrote "still has trust issues".

TH: And you read my writing upside down. You see what I mean? John, you're a soldier and it's going to take you a while to adjust to civilian life and writing a blog about everything that happens to you will honestly help you. JW: Nothing happens to me.

【October 12th】

MAN: What do you mean, there's no ruddy car?

WOMAN: He went to Waterloo, I'm sorry. Get a cab!

MAN: I never get cabs!

WOMAN: I love you.

MAN: When?

WOMAN: Get a cab!

WIFE: My husband... was a happy man who lived life to the full. He loved his family and his work, and that he should have taken his own life in this way is a mystery and a shock to all who knew him.

【November 26th】

BOY A: Yes, yes! Taxi! I'll be back in two minutes, mate.

BOY B: What?

BOY A: I'm just going home to get my umbrella.

BOY B: You can share mine.

BOY A: Two minutes, all right?

【January 27th】

MAN: She still dancing?

WOMAN: Yeah, if you can call it that.

MAN: Did you get the car keys off her?

A Study in Pink

WOMAN: Got them out of her bag.

MAN: Where is she?

【At the press conference】

D=Donovan L=Lestrade R=Reporter

D: The body of Beth Davenport, Junior Minister for Transport, was found late last night on a building site in Greater London. Preliminary investigations suggest that this was suicide. We can confirm that this apparent suicide closely resembles those of Sir Jeffrey Patterson and James Phillimore. In the light of this, these incidents are now being treated as linked. The investigation is ongoing but Detective Inspector Lestrade will take questions now.

R: Detective Inspector, how can suicides be linked?

L: Well, they all took the same poison. They were all found in places they had no reason to be. None of them had shown any prior indication.

R: But you can't have serial suicides.

L: Well, apparently you can.

R: These three people, there's nothing that links them?

L: There's no link we've found yet but we're looking for it. There has to be one.

【Wrong!】

D: If you've all got texts, please ignore them.

R: It just says "Wrong".

D: Well, just ignore that. If there are no more questions, I'm going to bring this session to an end.

R: If they're suicides, what are you investigating?

L: As I say, these suicides are clearly linked. It's an unusual situation, we've got our best people investigating.

【Wrong!】

R: Says "Wrong" again.

D: One more question.

R: Is there any chance that these are murders? And if they are, is this the work of a serial killer?

L: I know that you like writing about these but these do appear to be suicides. We know the difference. The poison was clearly self-administered.

R: Yes, but if they are murders, how do people keep themselves safe?

A Study in Pink

L: Well, don't commit suicide.

D: Daily Mail!

L: Obviously, this is a frightening time for people, but all anyone has to do is exercise reasonable precautions. We are all as safe as we want to be.

【Wrong!】

【You know where to find me. SH】

L: Thank you.

D: You've got to stop him doing that. He's making us look like idiots.

L: If you can tell me how he does it, I'll stop him.

MI=Mike Stamford JW=John Watson

MI: John! John Watson!

MI: Stamford, Mike Stamford. We were at Barts together.

JW: Yes, sorry, yes, Mike, hello.

MI: Yeah, I know, I got fat.

JW: No, no.

MI: I heard you were abroad somewhere getting shot at. What happened?

JW: I got shot.

JW: Are you still at Barts, then?

MI: Teaching now, yeah. Bright young things like we used to be. God, I hate them. What about you? Just staying in town till you get yourself sorted?

JW: I can't afford London on an Army pension.

MI: You couldn't bear to be anywhere else. That's not the John Watson I know.

JW: Yeah, I'm not the John Watson...

MI: Couldn't Harry help?

JW: Yeah, like that's going to happen

MI: I don't know, get a flatshare or something?

JW: Come on, who'd want me for a flatmate? What?

MI: You're the second person to say that to me today.

JW: Who was the first?

A Study in Pink

SH=Sherlock Holmes MO=Molly

SH: How fresh?

MO: Just in. 67, natural causes. Used to work here. I knew him, he was nice.

SH: Fine. We'll start with the riding crop.

MO: So, bad day was it?

SH: I need to know what bruises form in the next 20 minutes. A man's alibi depends on it. Text me. MO: Listen, I was wondering. Maybe later, when you're finished...

SH: You're wearing lipstick. You weren't wearing lipstick before.

MO: I refreshed it a bit.

SH: Sorry, you were saying?

MO: I was wondering if you'd like to have coffee?

SH: Black, two sugars, please. I'll be upstairs.

MO: OK.

JW: Bit different from my day.

MI: You've no idea!

SH: Mike, can I borrow your phone? There's no signal on mine.

MI: And what's wrong with the landline?

SH: I prefer to text.

MI: Sorry, it's in my coat.

JW: Here, use mine.

SH: Oh, thank you.

MI: This is an old friend of mine, John Watson.

SH: Afghanistan or Iraq?

JW: Sorry?

SH: Which was it, in Afghanistan or Iraq?

JW: Afghanistan, sorry, how did you know?

SH: Ah! Coffee, thank you. What happened to the lipstick?

MO: It wasn't working for me.

A Study in Pink

SH: Really? It was a big improvement. Your mouth's too small now.

MO: OK.

SH: How do you feel about the violin?

JW: I'm sorry, what?

SH: I play the violin when I'm thinking and sometimes I don't talk for days on end. Would that bother you? Potential flatmates should know the worst about each other.

JW: You told him about me?

MI: Not a word.

JW: Who said anything about flatmates?

SH: I did. Told Mike this morning that I must be a difficult man to find a flatmate for. Now here he is just after lunch with an old friend clearly just home from military service in Afghanistan. Wasn't a difficult leap. JW: How did you know about Afghanistan?

SH: Got my eye on a nice little place in central London. We ought to be able to afford it. We'll meet there tomorrow evening, seven o'clock. Sorry, got to dash. I think I left my riding crop in the mortuary.

JW: Is that it?

SH: Is that what?

JW: We've only just met and we're going to go and look at a flat?

SH: Problem?

JW: We don't know a thing about each other. I don't know where we're meeting; I don't even know your name. SH: I know you're an Army doctor and you've been invalided home from Afghanistan. You've got a brother worried about you but you won't go to him for help because you don't approve of him, possibly because he's an alcoholic, more likely because he recently walked out on his wife. And I know that your therapist thinks your limp's psychosomatic, quite correctly, I'm afraid. That's enough to be going on with, don't you think?

SH: The name's Sherlock Holmes and the address is 221B Baker Street.

SH: Afternoon.

MI: Yeah, he's always like that.

HU=Mrs. Hudson

SH: Hello.

JW: Ah, Mr Holmes.

A Study in Pink

SH: Sherlock, please.

JW: Well, this is a prime spot. Must be expensive.

SH: Mrs Hudson, the landlady she's given me a special deal. Owes me a favour. A few years back, her husband got himself sentenced to death in Florida. I was able to help out.

JW: Sorry, you stopped her husband being executed?

SH: Oh, no, I ensured it.

HU: Sherlock!

SH: Mrs Hudson, DrJohn Watson.

HU: Hello. Come in.

JW: Thank you.

SH: Shall we...?

LE=Lestrade

JW: Well, this could be very nice. Very nice indeed.

SH: Yes. Yes, I think so, my thoughts precisely.

SH: So I went straight ahead and moved in. Soon as we get all this rubbish cleaned out...

JW: So this is all...

SH: Well, obviously I can erm...straighten things up a bit.

JW: That's a skull.

SH: Friend of mine. When I say friend...

HU: What do you think, then, Dr Watson? There's another bedroom upstairs, if you'll be needing two bedrooms. JW: Of course we'll be needing two.

HU: Oh, don't worry, there's all sorts round here. Mrs. Turner next door's got married ones. Oh...Sherlock! The mess you've made.

JW: I looked you up on the internet last night.

SH: Anything interesting?

JW: Found your website. The Science of Deduction.

SH: What did you think?

JW: You said you could identify a software designer by his tie and an airline pilot by his left thumb?

SH: Yes. And I can read your military career in your face and your leg, and your brother's drinking habits on your 6

A Study in Pink

mobile phone.

JW: How?

HU: What about these suicides then, Sherlock? I thought that'd be right up your street. Three exactly the same. SH: Four. There's been a fourth. And there's something different this time.

HU: A fourth?

SH: Where?

LE: Brixton, Lauriston Gardens.

SH: What's new about this one? You wouldn't have come to me otherwise.

LE: You know how they never leave notes?

SH: Yeah.

LE: This one did. Will you come?

SH: Who's on forensics?

LE: Anderson.

SH: He doesn't work well with me.

LE: Well, he won't be your assistant.

SH: I NEED an assistant.

LE: Will you come?

SH: Not in a police car, I'll be right behind.

LE: Thank you.

SH: Brilliant! Yes! Four serial suicides, and now a note. Oh, it's Christmas. Mrs Hudson, I'll be late. Might need some food.

HU: I'm your landlady, dear, not your housekeeper.

SH: Something cold will do. John, have a cup of tea, make yourself at home. Don't wait up!

HU: Look at him, dashing about...My husband was just the same. But you're more the sitting-down type, I can tell. I'll make you that cuppa, you rest your leg.

JW: Damn my leg! Sorry, I'm so sorry - It's just sometimes this bloody thing...

HU: I understand, dear, I've got a hip.

JW: Cup of tea'd be lovely. Thank you.

HU: Just this once, dear, I'm not your housekeeper.

JW: Couple of biscuits too, if you've got 'em.

A Study in Pink

HU: Not your housekeeper!

SH: You're a doctor. In fact you're an Army doctor.

JW: Yes.

SH: Any good?

JW: Very good.

SH: Seen a lot of injuries, then. Violent deaths.

JW: Well, yes.

SH: Bit of trouble too, I bet?

JW: Of course. Yes. Enough for a lifetime, far too much.

SH: Want to see some more?

JW: Oh, God, yes.

Sorry Mrs. Hudson, I'll skip the tea. Off out.

HU: Both of you?

SH: Impossible suicides? Four of them? No point sitting at home when there's finally something fun going on! HU: Look at you, all happy. It's not decent.

SH: Who cares about decent? The game, Mrs. Hudson, is on! Taxi!

SH: OK, You've got questions...

JW: Yeah, where are we going?

SH: Crime scene. Next?

JW: Who are you, what do you do?

SH: What do you think?

JW: I'd say...private detective.

SH: But?

JW: But the police don't go to private detectives.

SH: I'm a consulting detective. Only one in the world, I invented the job.

JW: What does that mean?

SH: Means when the police are out of their depth, which is always, they consult me.

JW: The police don't consult amateurs.

SH: When I met you for the first time yesterday, I said Afghanistan or Iraq. You looked surprised. 8

A Study in Pink

JW: Yes, how did you know?

SH: I didn't know, I saw. 'Your haircut, the way you hold yourself says military. 'But your conversation...' Bit different from my day...said trained at Barts - so Army doctor, obvious. 'Your face is tanned... 'but no tan above the wrists. You've been abroad, but not sunbathing. 'Your limp's really bad when you walk, but you don't ask for a chair when you stand - 'so it's at least partly psychosomatic. 'That says the original circumstances of the injury were traumatic- Wounded in action then. Wounded in action, suntan - Afghanistan or Iraq.

JW: You said I had a therapist.

SH: You've got a psychosomatic limp, of course you've got a therapist. Then there's your brother.

JW: Mm?

SH: Your phone. 'It's expensive, e-mail enabled, MP3 player.' And you're looking for a flatshare. You wouldn't buy this - it's a gift. 'Scratches. Not one, many over time -' it's been in the same pocket as keys and coins. You wouldn't treat your one luxury item like this, so it's had a previous owner. Next bit's easy. You know it already.

JW: The engraving?

SH: Harry Watson. Clearly a family member who's given you his old phone. Not your father, this is a young man's gadget. Could be a cousin, but you're a war hero who can't find a place to live - unlikely you've got an extended family, not one you're close to. So brother it is. Now, who's Clara? Three kisses says it's a romantic attachment. The expense of the phone says wife, not girlfriend. Must have given it to him recently, it's only six months old. Marriage in trouble then - six months on he's given it away. If she'd left HIM, he would have kept it. Sentiment. No, he wanted rid of it. He left HER. He gave the phone to you, so he wants you to stay in touch. You're looking for cheap accommodation, but you're not going to your brother for help - that says you've got problems with him. Maybe you liked his wife, or don't like his drinking.

JW: How can you possibly know about the drinking?

SH: Shot in the dark. Good one, though. Power connection - tiny little scuff marks round it. Every night he plugs it in but his hands are shaking. You never see those marks on a sober man's phone, never see a drunk's without them. There you go, you were right.

JW: I was right? Right about what?

SH: The police don't consult amateurs.

JW: That...was amazing.

SH: Do you think so?

JW: Of course it was. It was extraordinary, it was quite extraordinary.

A Study in Pink

SH: That's not what people normally say.

JW: What do people normally say?

SH: Piss off!

DO=Donovan AN=Anderson LE=Lestrade

SH: Did I get anything wrong?

JW: Harry and me don't get on, never have, Clara and Harry split up three months ago and they're getting a divorce, and Harry is a drinker.

SH: Spot on, then. I didn't expect to be right about everything.

JW: Harry's short for Harriet.

SH: Harry's your sister.

JW: Look, what exactly am I supposed to be doing here?

SH: Sister!

JW: No - seriously, what am I doing here?

SH: There's always something.

DO: Hello, freak!

SH: I'm here to see Detective Inspector Lestrade.

DO: Why?

SH: I was invited.

DO: Why?

SH: I think he wants me to take a look.

DO: Well, you know what I think, don't you?

SH: Always Sally. I even know you didn't make it home last night.

DO: I don't... Who's this?

SH: Colleague of mine, Dr Watson. Dr Watson, Sergeant Sally Donovan. Old friend.

DO: A colleague(?) How do you get a colleague? Did he follow you home?

JW: Would it be better if I just waited...

SH: No.

DO: Freak's here. Bringing him in.

SH: Ah, Anderson. Here we are again.

A Study in Pink

AN: It's a crime scene. I don't want it contaminated. Are we clear on that?

SH: Quite clear. And is your wife away for long?

AN: Oh, don't pretend you worked that out. Somebody told you that.

SH: Your deodorant told me that.

AN: My deodorant?

SH: It's for men.

AN: Well, of course it's for men - I'm wearing it.

SH: So's Sergeant Donovan. Ooh... I think it just vaporised. May I go in?

AN: Whatever you're trying to imply...

SH: I'm not implying anything. I'm sure Sally came round for a nice little chat, and just happened to stay over. And I assume she scrubbed your floors, going by the state of her knees.

SH: You'll need to wear one of these.

LE: Who's this?

SH: He's with me.

LE: But who is he?

SH: I said he's with me.

JW: Aren't you going to put one on?

SH: So where are we?

LE: Upstairs.

LE: I can give you two minutes.

SH: May need longer.

LE: Her name's Jennifer Wilson according to her credit cards, we're running them now for contact details. Hasn't been here long. Some kids found her.

SH: Shut up.

LE: I didn't say anything.

SH: You were thinking. It's annoying.

LE: Got anything?

SH: Not much.

LE: She's German. Rache. It's German for revenge. She could be trying to tell us something...

A Study in Pink

SH: Yes, thank you for your input.

LE: So she's German?

SH: Of course she's not. She's from out of town though. Intended to stay in London for one night before returning home to Cardiff. So far, so obvious.

JW: Sorry - obvious?

LE: What about the message though?

SH: Dr Watson, what do you think?

JW: Of the message?

SH: Of the body. You're a medical man.

L: We have a whole team right outside.

SH: They won't work with me.

LE: I'm breaking every rule letting YOU in here...

SH: Yes...because you need me.

LE: Yes, I do. God help me.

SH: Dr Watson!

JW: Hm?

LE: Oh, do as he says. Help yourself. Anderson, keep everyone out for a couple of minutes...

JW: Well? What am I doing here?

SH: Helping me make a point.

JW: I'm supposed to be helping you pay the rent.

SH: This is more fun.

JW: Fun? There's a woman lying dead.

SH: Perfectly sound analysis, but I WAS hoping you'd go deeper.

JW: Yeah... Asphyxiation, probably. Passed out, choked on her own vomit. Can't smell any alcohol on her. It could have been a seizure. Possibly drugs.

SH: You know what it was, you've read the papers.

JW: Well, she's one of the suicides. The fourth...?

LE: Sherlock - two minutes, I said, I need anything you got.

SH: Victim is in her late 30s. Professional person, going by her clothes - I'm guessing the media, going by the frankly alarming shade of pink. Travelled from Cardiff today intending to stay in London one night from the size 12

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of her suitcase.

LE: Suitcase?

SH: Yes. She's been married at least ten years, but not happily. She's had a string of lovers but none of them knew she was married.

LE: Oh, for God's sake, if you're just making this up...

SH: Her wedding ring. Ten years old at least. The rest of her jewellery has been regularly cleaned, but not her wedding ring. The inside is shinier than the outside. The only polishing it gets is when she works it off her finger. It's not for work, look at her nails. She doesn't work with her hands so who DOES she remove her rings for? Not ONE lover, she'd never sustain the fiction of being single for that long so more likely a string of them.

JW: Brilliant. Sorry.

LE: Cardiff?

SH: It's obvious, isn't it?

JW: It's not obvious to me.

SH: Dear God, what is it like in your funny little brains, it must be so boring. Her coat - it's slightly damp, she's been in heavy rain the last few hours - no rain anywhere in London in that time. Under her coat collar is damp too. She's turned it up against the wind. She's got an umbrella in her pocket but it's dry and unused. Not just wind, strong wind - too strong to use her umbrella. We know from her suitcase that she was intending to stay overnight but she can't have travelled more than two or three hours because her coat still hasn't dried. So - where has there been heavy rain and strong wind within the radius of that travel time? Cardiff.

JW: Fantastic.

SH: Do you know you do that out loud?

JW: Sorry, I'll shut up.

SH: No, it's...fine.

LE: Why do you keep saying suitcase?

SH: Yes, where is it? She must have had a phone or an organiser. Find out who Rachel is.

LE: She was writing Rachel?

SH: No, she was leaving an angry note in German - of course she was writing Rachel, no other word it can be. Why did she wait until she was dying to write it?

LE: How do you know she had a suitcase?

SH: Tiny splash marks on her right heel and calf not present on the left. She was dragging a wheeled suitcase 13

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behind her with her right hand, by that splash pattern. Smallish case, going by the spread. Case that size, woman this clothes-conscious - could only be an overnight bag so we know she was staying one night. Where is it, what have you done with it?

LE: There wasn't a case.

SH: Say that again.

LE: There wasn't a case. There was never any suitcase.

SH: Suitcase! Did anyone find a suitcase? Was there a suitcase in this house?

LE: Sir, there was no case!

SH: But they take the poison themselves, swallow the pills. There are clear signs, even you lot couldn't miss them. LE: Right, thanks. And...?

SH: It's murder, all of them. I don't know how. But they're not suicides, they're serial killings. We've got a serial killer. There's always something to look forward to.

LE: Why are you saying that?

SH: Her case! Come on, where is her case? Did she eat it(?) Someone else was here, and they took her case. So the killer must have driven here. Forgot the case was in the car.

JW: She could have checked into a hotel, left it there.

SH: No, look at her hair. She colour-coordinates her lipstick and her shoes. She'd never have left any hotel with her hair still looking... Oh... Oh!

LE: Sherlock? What is it, what?

SH: Serial killers, always hard. You have to wait for them to make a mistake.

LE: We can't just wait!

SH: Oh, we're done waiting. Look at her, really look! Houston, we have a mistake. Get on to Cardiff. Find out who Jennifer Wilson's family and friends were. Find Rachel!

LE: Of course, yeah - but what mistake?!

SH: Pink!

PO=Police

PO: Let's get on with it...

DO: He's gone.

JW: Who, Sherlock Holmes?

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DO: Yeah, he just took off. He does that.

JW: Is he coming back?

DO: Didn't look like it.

JW: Right. Right... Yes. Sorry, where am I?

DO: Brixton.

JW: Do you know where I could get a cab? It's just er... well - my leg.

DO: Er.....try the main road.

JW: Thanks.

DO: But you're not his friend. He doesn't HAVE friends. So who are you?

JW: I'm...I'm nobody. I just met him.

DO: OK, bit of advice then. Stay away from that guy.

JW: Why?

DO: You know why he's here? He's not paid or anything. He likes it. He gets off on it. The weirder the crime, the more he gets off. And you know what...? One day just showing up won't be enough. One day we'll be standing round a body and he'll be the one that put it there.

JW: Why would he do that?

Because he's a psychopath. Psychopaths get bored.

LE: Donovan!

DO: Coming. Stay away from Sherlock Holmes.

JW: Hello?

MAN: There is a security camera on the building to your left. 'Do you see it?

JW: Who's this? Who's speaking?

MAN: Do you see the camera, Dr Watson?

JW: Yeah, I see it.

MAN: Watch... There is another camera on the building opposite you. Do you see it?

JW: Mm-hm.

MAN: And finally, at the top of the building on your right.

JW: How are you doing this?

MAN: Get into the car, Dr Watson. 'I would make some sort of threat, but I'm sure your situation is quite clear to 15

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you.

JW: Hello.

Anthea: Hi.

JW: What's your name, then?

Anthea: Er...Anthea.

JW: Is that your real name?

Anthea: No.

JW: I'm John.

Anthea: Yes. I know.

JW: Any point in asking...where I'm going?

Anthea: None at all...John.

JW: OK.

MH=Mycroft Holmes

MH: Have a seat, John.

JW: You know, I've got a phone. I mean, very clever and all that, but er... you could just phone me. On my phone. MH: When one is avoiding the attention of Sherlock Holmes, one learns to be discreet, hence this place. Your leg must be hurting you. Sit down.

JW: I don't want to sit down.

MH: You don't seem very afraid.

JW: You don't seem very frightening.

MH: Yes...The bravery of the soldier. Bravery is by far the kindest word for stupidity, don't you think? What is your connection to Sherlock Holmes?

JW: I don't have one. I barely know him, I met him...yesterday.

MH: Mmm, and since yesterday you've moved in with him and now you're solving crimes together. Might we expect a happy announcement by the end of the week?

JW: Who are you?

MH: An interested party.

JW: Interested in Sherlock? Why? I'm guessing you're not friends.

MH: You've met him. How many friends do you imagine he has? I am the closest thing to a friend that Sherlock 16

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Holmes is capable of having.

JW: And what's that?

MH: An enemy.

JW: An enemy?

MH: In HIS mind, certainly. If you were to ask him, he'd probably say his arch-enemy. He does love to be dramatic.

JW: Well, thank God YOU'RE above all that.

MH: I hope I'm not distracting you.

JW: Not distracting me at all.

MH: Do you plan to continue your association with Sherlock Holmes?

JW: I could be wrong...but I think that's none of your business.

MH: It could be.

JW: It really couldn't.

MH: If you DO move into, erm.....221B Baker Street, I'd be happy to pay you a meaningful sum of money on a regular basis to ease your way.

JW: Why?

MH: Because you're not a wealthy man.

JW: In exchange for what?

MH: Information. Nothing indiscreet. Nothing you'd feel...uncomfortable with. Just tell me what he's up to. JW: Why?

MH: I worry about him. Constantly.

JW: That's nice of you.

MH: But I would prefer for various reasons that my concern go unmentioned, we have what you might call a... difficult relationship.

JW: No.

MH: But I haven't mentioned a figure.

JW: Don't bother.

MH: You're very loyal VERY quickly.

JW: No, I'm not, I'm just not interested.

MH: "Trust issues"...it says here.

A Study in Pink

JW: What's that?

MH: Could it be that you've decided to trust Sherlock Holmes of all people?

JW: Who says I trust him?

MH: You don't seem the kind to make friends easily.

JW: Are we done?

MH: You tell me. I imagine people have already warned you to stay away from him, but I can see from your left hand that's not going to happen.

JW: My what?

MH: Show me.

JW: Don't...

MH: Remarkable. What is? Most people...blunder round this city, and all they see are streets and shops and cars. When you walk with Sherlock Holmes, you see the battlefield. You've seen it already. Haven't you?

JW: What's wrong with my hand?

MH: You have an intermittent tremor in your left hand. Your therapist thinks it's post-traumatic stress disorder. She thinks you're haunted by memories of your military service.

JW: Who the hell are you? How do you know that?

MH: Fire her. She's got it the wrong way round. You're under stress right now and your hand is perfectly steady. You're not haunted by the war, Dr Watson... You miss it. Welcome back. Time to choose a side, Dr Watson. Anthea: I'm to take you home. Address?

JW: Er, Baker Street. 221B Baker Street. But I need to stop off somewhere first. Listen, your boss. Any chance you could not tell him this is where I went?

Anthea: Sure.

JW: You've told him already, haven't you?

Anthea: Yeah.

JW: Hey erm... do you ever get any free time?

Anthea: Oh, yeah. Lots. Bye...

JW: OK.

JW: What are you doing?

SH: Nicotine patch. Helps me think. Impossible to sustain a smoking habit in London these days. Bad news for 18

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brain work.

JW: It's good news for breathing.

SH: Oh... Breathing! Breathing's boring.

JW: Is that...three patches?

SH: It's a three-patch problem.

JW: Well...? You asked me to come, I'm assuming it's important.

SH: Oh - yeah, of course. Can I borrow your phone?

JW: My phone?

SH: Always a chance that my number will be recognised. It's on the website.

JW: Mrs Hudson's got a phone.

SH: Yeah, she's downstairs. I tried shouting but she didn't hear.

JW: I WAS the other side of London...

SH: There was no hurry.

JW: Here... So what's this about - the case?

SH: Her case...

JW: HER case?

SH: Her suitcase, yes, obviously. The murderer took her suitcase, first big mistake.

JW: OK, he took her case. So?

SH: It's no use, there's no other way. We'll have to risk it. On my desk there's a number. I want you to send a text. JW: You've brought me here... to send a text.

SH: Text, yes. The number on my desk. What's wrong?

JW: Just met a friend of yours.

SH: A friend?

JW: An enemy.

SH: Oh. Which one?

JW: Well, your arch-enemy, according to him. Do people have arch-enemies?

SH: Did he offer you money to spy on me?

JW: Yes.

SH: Did you take it?

JW: No.

A Study in Pink

SH: Pity, we could have split the fee. Think it through next time.

JW: Who is he?

SH: The most dangerous man you've ever met, and not my problem right now. On my desk, the number! JW: Jennifer Wilson. That was... Hang on. Wasn't that the dead woman?

SH: Yes. That's not important. Just enter the number. Are you doing it?

JW: Yes.

SH: Have you done it?

JW: Yeah - hang on!

SH: These words exactly. "What happened at Lauriston Gardens? "I must have blacked out. "22 Northumberland Street, please come."

JW: You blacked out?

SH: What? No... No! Type and send it. Quickly. Have you sent it?

JW: What's the address?

SH: 22 Northumberland Street. Hurry up!

JW: That's... That's the pink lady's case, that's Jennifer Wilson's case.

SH: Yes, obviously. Oh, perhaps I should mention - I didn't kill her.

JW: I never said you did.

SH: Why not? Given that text and the fact I have her case it's a perfectly logical assumption.

JW: Do people usually assume you're the murderer?

SH: Now and then, yes.

JW: OK...How did you get this?

SH: By looking.

JW: Where?

SH: The killer must have driven her to Lauriston Gardens. He could only keep her case by accident if it was in the car. Nobody could be seen with this case without drawing attention - particularly a man, which is statistically more likely. So obviously he'd feel compelled to get rid of it. Wouldn't have taken him more than five minutes to realise his mistake. I checked every backstreet wide enough for a car five minutes from Lauriston Gardens, 'and anywhere you could dispose of a bulky object without being observed. 'Took me less than an hour to find the right skip.'

JW: Pink. You got all that because you realised the case would be pink?

A Study in Pink

SH: It had to be pink, obviously.

JW: Why didn't I think of that(?)

SH: Because you're an idiot. No, no, no, don't look like that. Practically everyone is. Now, look. Do you see what's missing?

JW: From the case? How could I?

SH: Her phone. Where's her mobile phone? There was no phone on the body, there's no phone in the case. We know she had one. You just texted it.

JW: Maybe she left it at home.

SH: She has a string of lovers and she's careful about it. She never leaves her phone at home.

JW: Er... Why did I just send that text?

SH: Well, the question is where is her phone NOW?

JW: She could have lost it.

SH: Yes, or?

JW: The murderer... You think the murderer has the phone?

SH: Maybe she...left it when she left her case. Maybe he took it from her for some reason. Either way, the balance of probability is the murderer has her phone.

JW: Sorry...what are we doing - did I just text a murderer? What good will that do?

SH: A few hours after his last victim, and now he receives a text that can only be from her. If somebody had just found that phone they'd ignore a text like that, but the murderer... would panic.

JW: Have you talked to the police?

SH: Four people are dead, there isn't time.

JW: So why are you talking to ME?

SH: Mrs. Hudson took my skull.

JW: So I'm basically filling in for your skull?

SH: Relax, you're doing fine. Well?

JW: Well, what?

SH: Well - you could just sit there and...watch telly.

JW: What, you want me to come with you?

SH: I like company when I go out, and I think better when I talk aloud. The skull just attracts attention, so... Problem?

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JW: Yeah, Sergeant Donovan.

SH: What about her?

JW: She said...you get off on this. You enjoy it.

SH: And I said "dangerous", and here you are.

JW: Damn it!

JW: Where are we going?

SH: Northumberland Street's a five-minute walk from here.

JW: You think he's stupid enough to go there?

SH: No - I think he's brilliant enough. I love the brilliant ones. They're all so desperate to get caught.

JW: Why?

SH: Appreciation! Applause! At long last the spotlight. That's the frailty of genius, John, it needs an audience. JW: Yeah.

SH: This is his hunting ground. Right here in the heart of the city. Now that we know his victims were abducted, that changes everything. Because all of his victims disappeared from busy streets, crowded places, but nobody saw them go. Think! Who do we trust, even though we don't know them? Who passes unnoticed wherever they go? Who hunts in the middle of a crowd?

JW: Don't know. Who?

SH: Haven't the faintest. Hungry?

SH: Thank you, Billy. 22 Northumberland Street. Keep your eyes on it.

JW: He's not just going to ring the doorbell. He'd need to be mad.

SH: He has killed four people.

JW: OK.

Angelo: Sherlock! Anything on the menu, whatever you want, free. On the house, for you and for your date. SH: Do you want to eat?

JW: I'm not his date.

Angelo: This man got me off a murder charge.

SH: This is Angelo. Three years ago I proved to Lestrade at the time of a particularly vicious triple murder that Angelo was elsewhere, house-breaking.

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Angelo: He cleared my name.

SH: I cleared it a bit. Anything happening opposite?

Angelo: Nothing. But for this man, I'd have gone to prison.

SH: You did go to prison.

Angelo: I'll get a candle for the table. It's more romantic.

JW: I'm not his date!

SH: You may as well eat. We might have a long wait.

JW: Thanks. People don't have arch-enemies.

SH: I'm sorry?

JW: In real life. There are no arch-enemies in real life. Doesn't happen.

SH: Doesn't it? Sounds a bit dull.

JW: So who did I meet?

SH: What do real people have, then, in their..."real lives"?

JW: Friends? People they know, people they like, people they don't like...Girlfriends, boyfriends.

SH: Yes, well, as I was saying - dull.

JW: You don't have a girlfriend, then.

SH: Girlfriend? No, not really my area.

JW: Mm. Oh, right. Do you have a...boyfriend? Which is fine, by the way.

SH: I know it's fine.

JW: So you've got a boyfriend then.

SH: No.

JW: Right. OK. You're unattached. Like me. Fine. Good.

SH: John, erm...I think you should know that I consider myself married to my work, and while I'm flattered, I'm really not looking for any...

JW: No, I'm...not asking. No. I'm just saying, it's all fine.

SH: Good. Thank you. Look across the street. Taxi. It's stopped. Nobody getting in, and nobody getting out. Why a taxi? Oh, that's clever. Is it clever? Why is it clever?

JW: That's him.

SH: Don't stare.

JW: You're staring.

A Study in Pink

SH: We can't both stare.

JW: Sorry... I've got the cab number.

SH: Good for you. Right turn, one way, roadworks, traffic lights, bus lane, pedestrian crossing, left turn only, traffic lights.

JW: Sorry.

SH: Come on, John...Come on, John. We're losing him! This way. No - THIS way!

JW: Sorry...

SH: Police! Open her up. No...Teeth, tan. What - Californian...? LA, Santa Monica. Just arrived.

JW: How could you possibly know that?

SH: The luggage. Probably your first trip to London, right? Going by your final destination and the cabbie's route. Passenger: Sorry - are you guys the police?

SH: Yeah. Everything all right?

Passenger: Yeah.

SH: Welcome to London.

JW: Er, any problems - just let us know. Basically just a cab that happened to slow down.

SH: Basically.

JW: Not the murderer.

SH: Not the murderer, no.

JW: Wrong country, good alibi.

SH: As they go.

JW: Hey, where did you get this? Detective Inspector Lestrade?

SH: Yeah. I pickpocket him when he's annoying. You can keep that one, I've got plenty at the flat. What? JW: Nothing, just..."Welcome to London".

SH: Got your breath back?

JW: Ready when you are.

HU=Mrs. Hudson

JW: OK...That was ridiculous. That was the most ridiculous thing...I've ever done.

SH: And you invaded Afghanistan.

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JW: That wasn't just me. Why aren't we back at the restaurant?

SH: They can keep an eye out. It was a long shot anyway.

JW: So what were we doing there?

SH: Oh, just passing the time. And proving a point.

JW: What point?

SH: You. Mrs. Hudson! Dr Watson WILL take the room upstairs.

JW: Says who?

SH: Says the man at the door.

Angelo: Sherlock texted me. He said you forgot this.

JW: Ah...Er, thank you. Thank you.

HU: Sherlock, what have you done?

SH: Mrs Hudson?

HU: Upstairs.

LE=Lestrade DO=Donovan AN=Anderson

SH: What are you doing?

LE: Well, I knew you'd find the case, I'm not stupid.

SH: You can't just break into my flat.

LE: You can't withhold evidence - and I didn't break in.

SH: Well, what do you call this then?

LE: It's a drugs bust.

JW: Seriously? This guy - a junkie? Have you met him?

SH: John...

JW: You could search this flat all day, you wouldn't find anything you could call recreational. SH: John, you probably want to shut up now.

JW: But come on...No...

SH: What?

JW: You?

SH: Shut up! I'm not your sniffer dog.

LE: No, Anderson's my sniffer dog.

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SH: Anderson, what are YOU doing here on a drugs bust?

AN: Oh, I volunteered.

LE: They all did. They're not strictly speaking ON the drug squad, but they're very keen.

DO: Are these human eyes?

SH: Put those back!

DO: They were in the microwave.

SH: It's an experiment.

LE: Keep looking, guys. Or you could help us properly and I'll stand them down.

SH: This is childish.

LE: Well, I'm dealing with a child. Sherlock, this is our case. I'm letting you in, but you do not go off on your own. Clear?

SH: What - so you set up a pretend drugs bust to bully me?

LE: It stops being pretend if we find anything.

SH: I am clean!

LE: Is your flat...? All of it?

SH: Don't even smoke.

JW: Neither do I.

LE: So let's work together. We've found Rachel.

SH: Who is she?

Jennifer Wilson's only daughter.

SH: Her daughter? Why would she write her daughter's name? Why?

AN: Never mind that, we found the case. According to SOMEONE the murderer has the case, and we found it in the hands of our favourite psychopath.

SH: I'm a high-functioning sociopath. Do your research. You need to bring Rachel in and I need to question her. LE: She's dead.

SH: Excellent. How, when and why? Is there a connection? There has to be.

LE: Well, I doubt it, since she's been dead for 14 years. Technically she was never alive. Rachel was Jennifer Wilson's stillborn daughter, 14 years ago.

SH: No, that's.....that's not right. How...Why would she do that? Why?

AN: Why would she think of her daughter in her last moments? Yup - sociopath, I'm seeing it now.

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SH: She didn't think about her daughter. She scratched her name on the floor with her fingernails. She was dying. It took effort, it would have hurt.

JW: You said that the victims all took the poison themselves, that he MAKES them take it - well, maybe he...I don't know, talks to them. Maybe he used the death of her daughter somehow.

SH: Yeah, but that was ages ago. Why would she still be upset? Not good?

JW: Bit not good, yeah.

SH: If you were dying... If you'd been murdered - in your very last few seconds what would you say?

JW: "Please, God, let me live."

SH: Use your imagination!

JW: I don't have to.

SH: Yeah, but if you were clever... Jennifer Wilson running all those lovers - she WAS clever. She's trying to tell us something.

HU: Isn't the doorbell working? Your taxi's here, Sherlock.

SH: I didn't order a taxi. Go away.

HU: Oh, dear. They're making such a mess. What are they looking for?

SH: It's a drugs bust, Mrs. Hudson.

HU: But they're just for my hip. They're herbal soothers...

SH: Shut up, everybody! Don't speak, don't breathe. I'm trying to think. Anderson, face the other way. You're putting me off.

AN: What? My face is?

LE: Everybody quiet and still. Anderson, turn your back.

AN: Oh, for God's sake!

LE: Your back, now, please!

SH: Come on, think. Quick!

HU: What about your taxi?

SH: MRS HUDSON! Oh... Ah! She was clever. Clever, yes! She's cleverer than you lot and she's dead. Do you see, do you get it? She didn't lose her phone, she never lost it. She PLANTED it on him. When she got out of the car, she knew that she was going to her death. She left the phone in order to lead us to her killer.

LE: But how?

SH: What do you mean, how? Rachel! Don't you see? Rachel! Oh... Look at you lot. You're all so vacant. Is it nice 27

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not being me? It must be so relaxing. Rachel is not a name.

JW: Then what is it?

SH: John - on the luggage, there's a label. E-mail address.

JW: Er, jennie.pink@mephone.org.uk.

SH: She didn't have a laptop, which means she did her business on her phone. A smartphone, it's e-mail enabled. So there was a website for her account. The username is her e-mail address - and all together, the password is? AN: Rachel. So we can read her e-mails. So what?

SH: Anderson, don't talk out loud. You lower the IQ of the whole street. We can do much more than that. It's a smartphone, it's got GPS. Which means if you lose it you can

locate it online. She's leading us directly to the man who killed her.

LE: Unless he got rid of it.

JW: We know he didn't.

SH: Come on, come on. Quickly!

HU: Sherlock, dear. This taxi driver...

SH: Mrs. Hudson, isn't it time for your evening soother? Get vehicles, get a helicopter. This phone battery won't last for ever.

LE: We'll just have a map reference, not a name.

SH: It's a start!

JW: Sherlock...

SH: Narrows it down from just anyone in London. It's the first proper lead that we've had.

JW: Sherlock...

SH: Where is it? Quickly, where?

JW: Here. It's...in 221 Baker Street.

SH: How can it be here? How?

LE: Maybe it was in the case when you brought it back and it...fell out somewhere.

SH: What, and I didn't notice it? Me - I didn't notice?

JW: Anyway, we texted him and he called back.

LE: Guys, we're also looking for a mobile somewhere here, belonged to the victim...

【Who do we trust, even if we don't know them?】

【Who passes unnoticed wherever they go?】

A Study in Pink

【Who hunts in the middle of a crowd?】

JW: Sherlock, you OK? What...?

SH: Yeah, yeah... I'm fine.

JW: So, how can the phone be here?

SH: Don't know.

JW: I'll try it again.

SH: Good idea.

JW: Where are you going?

SH: Fresh air, just popping outside for a moment. Won't be long.

JW: You sure you're all right?

SH: I'm fine.

CA=Cabbie

CA: Taxi for Sherlock Holmes.

SH: I didn't order a taxi.

CA: Doesn't mean you don't need one.

SH: You're the cabbie. The one who stopped outside Northumberland Street. It was you. Not your passenger.

CA: See? No-one ever thinks about the cabbie. It's like you're invisible. Just the back of an 'ead. Proper advantage for a serial killer.

SH: Is this a confession?

CA: Oh, yeah. I'll tell you what else... If you call the coppers now, I won't run. I'll sit quiet and they can take me down, I promise.

SH: Why?

CA: Cos you're not going to do that.

SH: Am I not?

CA: I didn't kill those four people, Mr. Holmes. I spoke to 'em...and they killed themselves. If you get the coppers now, I'll promise you one thing. I will never tell you what I said.

SH: No-one else will die, though, and I believe they call that a result.

CA: And you won't ever understand how those people died. What kind of result do you care about?

SH: If I wanted to understand.....what would I do?

A Study in Pink

CA: Let me take you for a ride.

SH: So you can kill me too?

CA: I don't want to kill you, Mr. Holmes. I'm going to talk to ya.....and then you're going to kill yourself.

JW: He just got in a cab...It's Sherlock. He just drove off in a cab.

DO: I told you, he does that. He bloody left again. We're wasting our time!

JW: I'm...calling the phone, it's ringing out.

LE: And if it's ringing, it's not here.

JW: I'll try the search again.

DO: Does it matter? Does any of it? He's just a lunatic, and he'll always let you down. And you're wasting your time. All our time.

LE: OK, everybody...done here.

SH: How did you find me?

CA: Oh, I recognised ya. Soon as I saw you chasing my cab. Sherlock Holmes! I was warned about you. I've been on your website, too. Brilliant stuff! Loved it.

SH: Who warned you about me?

CA: Just someone out there who's noticed.

SH: Who? Who would notice me?

CA:You're too modest, Mr Holmes.

SH: I'm really not.

CA:Got yourself a fan.

SH: Tell me more.

CA: That's all you're going to know. In THIS lifetime.

LE: Why did he do that? Why did he have to leave?

JW: You know him better than I do.

LE: I've known him for five years - and no, I don't.

JW: So why do you put up with him?

LE: Because I'm desperate, that's why. And because Sherlock Holmes is a great man - and I think one day, if we're 30

A Study in Pink

very, very lucky, he might even be a good one.

SH: Where are we?

CA: You know every street in London. You know exactly where we are.

SH: Roland-Kerr Further Education College. Why here?

It's open. Cleaners are in. One thing about being a cabbie - you always know a nice quiet spot for a murder. I'm surprised more of us don't branch out.

SH: And you just walk your victims in? How? Oh... Dull.

CA: Don't worry. It gets better.

SH: You can't make people take their own lives at gunpoint.

CA: I don't. It's much better than that. Don't need this with you. Cos you'll follow me. Well, what do you think? It's up to you. You're the one who's going to die here.

SH: No, I'm not.

CA: That's what they all say. Shall we talk?

SH: Bit risky, wasn't it? Took me away under the eye of about half a dozen policemen. They're not that stupid. And Mrs. Hudson will remember you.

CA: You call that a risk? Nah...THIS is a risk. Oh, I like this bit. Cos you don't get it yet, do ya? But you're about to. I just have to do this... Weren't expecting that, were ya? Oh, you're going to love this.

SH: Love what?

CA: Sherlock Holmes! Look at you! Here in the flesh. That website of yours, your fan told me about it. SH: My fan?

CA: You are brilliant. You are a proper genius. The Science of Deduction. Now, that...is proper thinking. Between you and me sitting here, why can't people think? Don't it make you mad? Why can't people just think?

SH: Oh, I see...So you're a proper genius too.

CA: Don't look it, do I? Funny little man driving a cab. But you'll know better in a minute. Chances are it'll be the last thing you ever know.

SH: OK, two bottles. Explain.

CA: There's a good bottle and a bad bottle. You take the pill from the good bottle, you live. You take the pill from the bad bottle...you die.

SH: Both bottles are of course identical.

A Study in Pink

CA: In every way.

SH: And you know which is which.

CA: Of course I know.

SH: But I don't.

CA: Wouldn't be a game if you knew. You're the one who chooses.

SH: Why should I? I've got nothing to go on. What's in it for me?

CA: I haven't told you the best bit yet. Whatever bottle YOU choose, I take the pill from the other one. And then together...we take our medicine. I won't cheat. It's your choice. I'll take whatever pill you don't. Didn't expect that, did you, Mr. Holmes?

SH: This is what you did to the rest of them - you gave them a choice?

CA: And now I'm giving you one. You take your time. Get yourself together. I want your best game.

SH: It's not a game, it's chance.

CA: I've played four times. I'm alive. It's not chance, Mr. Holmes, it's chess. It's a game of chess, with one move...and one survivor. And this - this...is the move. Did I just give you the good bottle or the bad bottle? You can choose either one.

JW: No, Detective Inspector Lestrade - I need to speak to him. It's important. It's an emergency.

JW: Er, left here, please. Left here...

CA: You ready yet, Mr. Holmes? Ready to play?

SH: Play what? It's a 50:50 chance.

CA: You're not playing the numbers, you're playing ME. Did I just give you the good pill or the bad pill? Is it a bluff, or a double bluff? Or a triple bluff?

SH: It's still just chance.

CA: Four people, in a row? It's not chance.

SH: Luck.

CA: It's genius! I know how people think. I know how people think I think. I can see it all like a map inside my head. Everyone's so stupid, even you. Or maybe God just loves me.

SH: Either way, you're wasted as a cabbie. So...You risked your life four times just to kill strangers? Why? CA: Time to play.

A Study in Pink

SH: Oh, I am playing. This is my turn. There's shaving foam behind your left ear. Nobody's pointed it out to you. Traces of where it's happened before, so obviously you live on your own - there's no-one to tell you. But there's a photograph of children. Their mother's been cut out. If she'd died, she'd still be there. The photograph's old, but the frame's new. You think of your children, but you don't get to see them. Estranged father. She took the kids, but you still love them and it still hurts. Ah, but there's more. Your clothes. Recently laundered, but everything you're wearing is at least...three years old? Keeping up appearances, but not planning ahead. And here you are on a kamikaze murder spree. What's that about? Ah...Three years ago. Is that when they told you?

CA: Told me what?

SH: That you're a dead man walking.

CA: So are you.

SH: You don't have long, though. Am I right?

CA: Aneurism. Right in 'ere. Any breath could be my last.

SH: And because you're dying, you've just murdered four people.

CA: I've outlived four people. That's the most fun you can have with an aneurism.

SH: No... No, there's something else. You didn't just kill four people because you're bitter. Bitterness is a paralytic. Love is a much more vicious motivator. Somehow, this is about your children.

CA: Oh...You ARE good, in't ya?

SH: But how?

CA: When I die they won't get much, my kids. Not a lot of money in driving cabs.

SH: Or serial killing.

CA: You'd be surprised.

SH: Surprise me.

CA: I have a sponsor.

SH: You have a what?

CA: For every life I take, money goes to my kids. The more I kill...the better off they'll be. You see? It's nicer than you think.

SH: Who'd sponsor a serial killer?

CA: Who'd be a fan of Sherlock Holmes? You're not the only one to enjoy a good murder. There's others out there just like you, except you're just a man. And they're so much more than that.

SH: What do you mean...more than a man? An organisation...? What?

A Study in Pink

CA: There's a name, that no-one says. And I'm not going to say it either. Now, enough chatter. Time to choose.

JW: Sherlock?! Sherlock!

SH: What if I don't choose either? I could just walk out of here.

CA: You can take a 50:50 chance, or I can shoot you in the head. Funnily enough, no-one's ever gone for that option.

SH: I'll have the gun, please.

CA: Are you sure?

SH: Definitely. The gun.

CA: You don't want to phone a friend(?)

SH: The gun. I know a real gun when I see one.

CA: None of the others did. Clearly.

SH: Well, this has been very interesting. I look forward to the court case.

CA: Just before you go, did you figure it out? Which one's the good bottle?

SH: Course. Child's play.

CA: Well, which one, then? Which one would you have picked? Just so I know whether I could have beaten you. Come on! Play the game. Oh! Interesting. So what do you think? Shall we? Really... What do you think? Can you beat me? Are you clever enough.....to bet your life?

JW: SHERLOCK!

CA: I bet you get bored, don't you? I know you do. A man like you. So clever. But what's the point of being clever if you can't prove it? Still the addict. But this...this is what you're really addicted to. You'll do anything.....anything at all, to stop being bored. You're not bored now, are ya? Isn't it good?

SH: Was I right? I was, wasn't I? Did I get it right?! OK... Tell me this. Your sponsor. Who was it? The one who told you about me, my fan. I want a name.

CA: No...

SH: You're dying, but there's still time to hurt you. Give me...a name. A name! Now. The name!

CA: MORIARTY!

A Study in Pink

SH: Why have I got this blanket? They keep putting this blanket on me.

LE: Yeah, it's for shock.

SH: I'm not in shock.

LE: Yeah, but some of the guys want to take photographs.

SH: So, the shooter. No sign?

LE: Cleared off before we got here. But a guy like that would have had enemies, I suppose. One of them could have been following him, but...we've got nothing to go on.

SH: Oh, I wouldn't say that.

LE: OK. Give me.

SH: The bullet they just dug out of the wall's from a handgun. A kill shot over that distance, that's a crack shot. But not just a marksman, a fighter. His hands couldn't have shaken at all so clearly he's acclimatized to violence. He didn't fire until I was in immediate danger though, so strong moral principle. You're looking for a man probably with a history of military service, and...nerves of steel... Actually, do you know what? Ignore me. LE: Sorry?

SH: Ignore all of that. It's just the er...the shock talking.

LE: Where are you going?

SH: I just need to...talk about the rent.

LE: I've still got questions.

SH: What now? I'm in shock - look, I've got a blanket.

LE: Sherlock!

SH: And, I just caught you a serial killer... More or less.

LE: OK. We'll pull you in tomorrow, off you go.

JW: Erm - Sergeant Donovan has...just been explaining everything. The two pills...Dreadful business, isn't it? Dreadful.

SH: Good shot.

JW: Yes. Yes, must have been. Through that window.

SH: Well, you'd know. Need to get the powder burns out of your fingers. I don't suppose you'd serve time for this, but let's avoid the court case. Are you all right?

A Study in Pink

JW: Yes, of course I'm all right.

SH: Well, you have just killed a man.

JW: Yes...That's true, isn't it? But he wasn't a very nice man.

SH: No. No, he wasn't, really, was he?

JW: Frankly a bloody awful cabbie.

SH: That's true, he was a bad cabbie. You should have seen the route he took us to get here.

JW: Stop it! We can't giggle, it's a crime scene. Stop it.

SH: Well, you're the one who shot him.

JW: Keep your voice down. Sorry, it's just erm...nerves, I think.

SH: Sorry.

JW: You were going to take that damn pill, weren't you?

SH: Course I wasn't. Biding my time. Knew you'd turn up.

JW: No, you didn't. That's how you get your kicks, isn't it - you risk your life to prove you're clever.

SH: Why would I do that?

JW: Because you're an idiot.

SH: Dinner?

JW: Starving.

SH: End of Baker Street there's a good Chinese. Stays open till two. You can tell a good Chinese by the bottom third of the door handle.

MH=Mycroft Holmes

JW: Sherlock... That's him, that's the man I was talking to you about.

SH: I know exactly who that is.

MH: So... Another case cracked. How very public-spirited. Though that's never really your motivation, is it? SH: What are you doing here?

MH: As ever, I'm concerned about you.

SH: Yes, I've been hearing about your "concern".

MH: Always so aggressive. Did it never occur to you that you and I belong on the same side?

SH: Oddly enough - no.

MH: We have more in common than you'd like to believe. This petty feud between us is simply childish. People 36

A Study in Pink

will suffer. And you know how it always upset Mummy.

SH: I upset her? Me? It wasn't me that upset her, Mycroft.

JW: No. No, wait...Mummy? Who's Mummy?

SH: Mother. Our mother. This is my brother, Mycroft. Putting on weight again?

MH: Losing it, in fact.

JW: He's your brother?

SH: Course he's my brother.

JW: So he's not...

SH: Not what?

JW: I don't know... Criminal mastermind?

SH: Close enough.

MH: For goodness' sake. I occupy a minor position in the British government.

SH: He IS the British government, when he's not too busy being the British secret service or the CIA on a freelance basis. Good evening, Mycroft. Try not to start a war before I get home, you know what it does for the traffic.

JW: So, when you say you're concerned about him - you actually are concerned?

MH: Yes, of course.

JW: I mean, it actually is a childish feud?

MH: He's always been so resentful. You can imagine the Christmas dinners.

JW: Yeah...No... God, no. I'd better erm...Hello again.

Anthea: Hello.

JW: We met earlier on this evening.

Anthea: Oh!

JW: OK. Goodnight.

MH: Goodnight, Dr Watson.

JW: So, dim sum. Mmm!

SH: I can always predict the fortune cookies.

JW: No, you can't.

SH: Almost can. You did get shot, though.

JW: Sorry?

A Study in Pink

SH: In Afghanistan. There was an actual wound.

JW: Oh. Yeah, shoulder.

SH: Shoulder! I thought so.

JW: No, you didn't.

SH: The left one.

JW: Lucky guess.

SH: I never guess.

JW: Yes, you do. What are you so happy about?

SH: Moriarty.

JW: What's Moriarty?

SH: I've absolutely no idea.

Anthea: Sir, shall we go?

MH: Interesting, that soldier fellow. He could be the making of my brother...or make him worse than ever. Either way, we'd better upgrade their surveillance status. Grade three active.

Anthea: Sorry, sir - whose status?

MH: Sherlock Holmes, and Dr Watson.

--END

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